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Conference thebay::joyoflex

Title:	The Joy of Lex
Notice:	A Notes File even your grammar could love
Moderator:	THEBAY::SYSTEM

Created:	Fri Feb 28 1986
Last Modified:	Mon Jun 02 1997
Last Successful Update:	Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:	1192
Total number of notes:	42769

57.0. "Spellos, thinkos, and typos" by SOURCE::CHRISTENSEN () Wed Feb 27 1985 09:13

   (This was distributed in the DESPERADO newsletter from KERMIT::)

 
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		          ITS A PRIVILEDGE
 
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                            DEC STANDARD SPELLOS:
                     The Programmer's Spelling Dictionary
 
 
 
    "Make is possible for programmers to write in English, and 
    you will find that programmers cannot write in English."
 
                            -- a not very old programming maxim
 
    A typo is a misspelling that results from a slip of the finger on the
    keyboard.  If the author notices the mistake, it gets fixed.  A spello
    is a misspelling that results from a slip of the mind.  If the word is
    then accurately transcribed, the author beams with pride over the
    wording of the document while the reader winces.
 
    Most readers in this company are reluctant to correct the spelling in
    MAIL, memos, etc., for fear of being labeled "!@#$%^&*ing nitpickers."
    This guide is intended as a self-help manual for all who care.  More
    help is available in the orthography section in the back of a
    dictionary.
 
    I'm not perfect, either, of course.  Please feel free to complain
    about my sloppy grammar or informal idiom, or even spelling.
 
    Please do NOT complain to me, however, about RUNOFF's (incorrectly)
    placing two blanks after colons and semicolons as well as at the ends
    of sentences.
 
    DEC standard spellos (in no particular order)
    --- -------- -------
 
    KERNAL:  properly "kernel." There is a story, possibly apocryphal,
    that the first several dozen PDP-11/45 front panels had to be replaced
    in the field by field service because the label on the "kernel mode"
    light was misspelled this way.  Sometimes carelessness can cost real
    money.  Perhaps someone who remembers can enlighten us.
 
    SEPERATE:  properly "separate." A very common spello, not limited to
    computer people.
 
    PROTOCALL:  properly "protocol." Perhaps there is an image of one
    participant "calling" another that causes this spello.
 
    SUPERCEDE:  properly "supersede." A well-known file system product
    from this company shipped with this word spelled incorrectly when used
    as a switch for one of the utilities.  Future versions have had to
    support the error made in the first version.  How did it slip by the
    entire programming staff *and* documentation staff *and* all the field
    test sites?
 
    ITS vs IT'S, YOUR vs YOU'RE, THEIR vs THEY'RE:  the following table
    should clarify the differences.
    Possessive pronouns:
 
            its             of or belonging to it
            your            of or belonging to you
            their           of or belonging to them
 
    Pronominal phrases: 
 
            it's            it is
            you're          you are
            they're         they are
 
 
    Probably the most common error among these is the use of "it's" where
    "its" is intended.  The "'s" on "it's" looks like the possessive form,
    as in "Charles's," but it's not.  In "it's," it's a contraction.
 
    FLOURESCENT:  properly "fluorescent," unless you're referring to the
    glowing bread that's always warm from the Yucca Flats Bakery (or the
    cheap imitation from Three Mile Island Bakery).
 
    ROLL:  common misspelling for "role," "part taken or played by
    someone."
 
    EDITTING, EDITTED, TARGETTED:  in the U.S.A., forming the participle
    from the present requires doubling the terminal consonant only if the
    accent would then (in the participle) cause the preceding short vowel
    to become long.  This holds true generally for any suffix beginning
    with a vowel.
 
    Example:  "e'dit" (where the apostrophe indicates an accent) can
    become "e'dited" without a major change of pronunciation.  The "i" is
    still short because there is no accent on the syllable.  On the other
    hand, "re-fer'" cannot become "re-fer'ed" because it would then rhyme
    with "revered." Doubling the terminal consonant yields "re-ferr'ed"
    (rhymes with "absurd"), retaining the short vowel.  Simple, eh?
 
            PRESENT         PARTICIPLE
 
            edit            edited, editing
            target          targeted (if you think it's a verb)
            travel          traveled, traveling
            consider        considered, considering
            layer           layered
            differ          differed
            journal         journaled, journaling (if it's a verb)
 
            club            clubbed
            plan            planned
            pet             petted
            jog             jogged
            defer           deferred
            refer           referred
            confer          conferred
            rebel (verb)    rebelled
            recap           recapped
 
 
    This rule differs in the U.K.  and probably in Australia, and I don't
    know about Canada.  In English English, the terminal consonant is
    (almost?) always doubled if it's an L.
 
    USEABLE, USEAGE:  properly, "usable" and "usage." There is some
    confusion about when you drop the e.  Similar rule to the one stated
    above about changing the pronunciation.  If dropping the e and adding
    the suffix would cause the pronunciation of the ultimate consonant to
    change (from soft to hard c or g, for instance), then don't drop the
    e.
 
    Keeping the e is quite rare, but mistakes can happen in both
    directions.
 
    ROOT            NO              YES
 
    use             useage          usage
    alternate       alternateing    alternating
    practice        practiceing     practicing
    surprise        surpriseing     surprising
 
    notice          noticable       noticeable
    manage          managable       manageable, management
    knowledge       knowledgable    knowledgeable
    trace           tracable        traceable
    advantage       advantagous     advantageous
 
 
    USEFULL:  properly "useful." Yes, a thing that is beautiful is full of
    beauty, but it isn't rendered that way in English anymore.
 
    PRACTICLY:  properly "practically." The adjective "practical" already
    contains the "-al" suffix, so add the "-ly" to it.  A common error
    modifying words that end in "-ic" or "-ical."
 
    EXISTANCE, NON-EXISTANT:  properly, these end in "-ence" and "-ent."
    There is a lot of confusion over endings such as "-ent" versus "-ant"
    and "-ible" versus "-able." Often our pronunciation simply doesn't
    reflect the spelling; that's what dictionaries are for.
 
    Misspellings of this type are extremely common, and our failure to
    challenge them when they appear in writing only perpetuates them by
    misleading a new generation of programmers.  Most of these mistakes
    are just plain careless.
 
            NO              YES
 
            existance       existence
            dependant       dependent
            independant     independent
            consistant      consistent (confused with constant?)
            consistancy     consistency
            inconsistant    inconsistent
            primative       primitive (confused with primary?)
            definately      definitely
            visable         visible (confused with viable?)
            flexable        flexible
            devine          divine
            compatable      compatible
            incompatable    incompatible
            occurrance      occurrence
 
 
    PRINCIPAL vs PRINCIPLE:  another confusion of endings.  A "principle"
    is an ethical doctrine (and a lot of other things:  look it up); a
    "principal" is a chief actor (and a lot of other things, too).  The
    most amusing misuse I've seen was the resume from the person claiming
    the title "Principle Software Writer." I don't think he/she got the
    job.
 
    MEDIA:  the plural of "medium." If a software product is distributed
    only in one magnetic form, then it uses "only one distribution
    medium," not "only one distribution media," as is commonly said and
    written.
 
    CRITERIA, PHENOMENA:  the plurals of "criterion" and "phenomenon,"
    respectively.
 
    Gross phonetic errors
    ----- -------- ------
 
    HOMOGENOUS:  properly "homogeneous." The word is supposed to sound
    like "hoe-moe-JEE-knee-us" because it has another "e" in it.  After
    you homogenize ("hoe-MA-jen-eyes") something, such as milk, it is
    homogeneous.
 
    BEARLY:  properly "barely," as in "Your performance is barely
    tolerable.  If it were any worse, it would be unbearable."
 
    EXPLANE (for explain)
 
    MUTE (for moot, which no one understands anyway)
 
    DEC standard thinkos
    --- -------- -------
 
    MORE or MOST UNIQUE, MOST FEASIBLE (comparative superlatives)
 
    COMPRISE:  often used backwards.  "Comprise" is a synonym for
    "include" or "contain" or "embrace." It is not a fancy version of
    "compose." Properly, the whole comprises the parts, just as the whole
    includes the parts.  The parts compose the whole.  The whole is
    composed of its parts, if you like passives (a subject for another
    day).  Yes, a story comprises three parts.  No, the several chapters
    do not comprise the book.
 
    PROACTIVE (by analogy with reactive, but nonexistent)
 
    RESPECTIVELY (malapropism for respectfully)
 
    Now, on the lighter side, we have a poem from a man who knows how to
    do it and simply doesn't want to.
 
    Subj:   Starbuck is a Prof. at BU who resides in lovely Milford, NH...
    Subj:   fyi (and, to you Ripley Superspellers, SO THEIR!)
 
    *The Spell Against Spelling*
 
            a poem
    to be inscribed
                    in dark places
            and
    never to be spoken aloud
 
                                    GEORGE E. STARBUCK
 
 
 
    My favorite student lately is the one who wrote about feeling clumbsy.
    I mean if he wanted to say how it feels to be all thumbs he
    Certainly picked the write language to right in the first place.
    I mean better to clutter a word up like the old Hearst place
    Than to just walk off the job and not give a dam.
 
    Another student gave me a diagragm.
    "The Diagragm of the Plot in Henry the VIIIth."
 
    Those, though, were instances of the sublime.
    The wonder is in the wonders they can come up with every time.
 
    Why do they all say heighth, but never weighth?
    If chrystal can look like English to them, how come chryptic can't?
    I guess cwm, chthonic, qanat, or quattrocento
    Always gets looked up.  But never momento.
    Momento they know.  Like wierd.  Like differant.
    It is a part of their deep deep-structure vocabulary:
    Their stone axe, their dark bent-offering to the gods:
    Their protoCro-Magnon pre-pre-sapient survival-against-cultural-odds.
 
    You won't get ME deputized in some Spelling Constabulary.
    I'd sooner abandon the bag-toke-whiff system and go decimal.
    I'm on their side.  I better be, after my brush with "infinitessimal."
 
    There it was, right where I put it, in my brand-new book.
    And my friend Peter Davison read it, and he gave me this look,
    And he held the book for a little while and said, "George..."
 
    I needed my students at that moment.  I, their Scourge.
    I needed them.  Needed their sympathy.  Needed their care.
    "Their their," I needed to hear them say, "their their."
 
    You see, there are SPELLERS in this world, I mean mean ones too.
    They shadow us around like a posse of Joe Btfsplks
    Waiting for us to sit down at our study-desks and go shrdlu
    So they can pop in at the windows saying "tsk tsk."
 
    I know they're there.  I know where the beggars are,
    With their flash cards looking like prescriptions for the catarrh
    And their mnemnmonics, blast 'em.  They go too farrh.
    I do not stoop to impugn, indict, or condemn;
    But I know how to get at the likes of thegm.
 
    For a long time, I keep mumb.
    I let 'em wait, while a preternatural calmn
    Rises to me from the depths of my upwardly opened palmb.
    Then I raise my eyes like some wizened-and-wisened gnolmbn,
    Stranger to scissors, stranger to razor and coslmbn,
    And I fix those birds with my gaze till my gaze strikes hoslgmbn,
    And I say one word, and the word that I say is "Oslgmbnh."
 
    "Om?" they inquire.  "No, not exactly.  OSLGMBNH.
    Watch me carefully while I pronounce it because you've got only two 
                    more guesses
    And you only get one more hint:  there's an odd number of esses,
    And you only get ten more seconds no nine more seconds no eight
    And a right answer doesn't count if it comes in late
    And a wrong answer bumps you out of the losers' bracket
    And disqualifies you for the National Spellathon Contestant jacket
    And that's all the time extension you're going to gebt
    So go pick up your consolation prizes from the usherebt
    And don't be surprised if it's the bowdlerized regularized paperback 
                    abridgment of Pepys
    Because around here, gentlemen, we play for kepys."
 
    Then I drive off in my chauffeured Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham
    Like something out of the last days of Fellini's Rougham
    And leave them smiting their brows and exclaiming to each other
                    "Ougham!
    O-U-G-H-A-M Ougham!" and tearing their hair.
 
    Intricate are the compoundments of despair.
 
    Well, brevity must be the soul of something-or-other.
 
    Not, certainly, of spelling, in the good old mother
    Tongue of Shakespeare, Raleigh, Marvell, and Vaughan.
    But something.  One finds out as one goes aughan.
 
 
 
 
    [Published in BOSTONIA, March 1984]
 
				=*=

T.R	Title	User	Personal Name	Date	Lines
57.1		NUHAVN::CANTOR		`Wed Feb 27 1985 18:36`	5
	I'd like to learn that poem by heart, but I need a pneumonic for it. :-) Dave C.
57.2		NY1MM::SWEENEY		`Wed Feb 27 1985 22:48`	4
	The problem is larger than DEC, it is part of a world-wide trend towards illiteracy among the literate. Pat Sweeney
57.3		TLE::WINALSKI	Paul S. Winalski	`Sun Mar 02 1986 15:29`	8
	My own favorite is LOOSE in place of LOSE, as in: The bug causes the program to loose the last few characters of any line. I think that functional illiteracy is one of the graduation requirements of MIT. --PSW
57.4		DONJON::MCVAY	Pete McVay	`Sun Mar 02 1986 22:29`	2
	See also Dave Barry's article "Hints for Writer's". It's in HYDRA::DAVE_BARRY.
57.5	P-r-i-v...	CHARON::MCGLINCHEY	Get a Bigger Hammer	`Wed Aug 19 1987 12:26`	45
	Found this in another conference and thought it made sense to put it here, too: <<< VAXWRK::NOTES$DEVICE:[NOTES$LIBRARY]RSX_SUPPORT.NOTE;1 >>> -< RSX-11 SUPPORT ISSUES >- ================================================================================ Note 779.3 Understanding uRSX CTRL/C 3 of 3 ALIEN::MCCARTHY 30 lines 18-AUG-1987 18:04 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- >> privledged and non-privledged UICs. These tasks were INStalled <IMPENDING_FLAME_WARNING_ON> I hoap know won wille teak offence at the folowing, butt ewe half hit uppon a hot button of the RXS enjineering groop. <IMPENDING_FLAME_WARNING_Off> <FLAME ON> It ain't priveleged. It ain't privleged. It ain't priviledged. It ain't even privledged. It's: ** *** * * ***** * *** * *** ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** ** * * * * * **** * ** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ***** * *** * * * ** Now, if I see it misspelled again, I'm going to take away all of your rights as a user. <FLAME OFF> I feel much better now. -Brian
57.6	I spell it 'priv'	MAGOO::PFC	What a concept!	`Thu Aug 20 1987 09:04`	7
	Re .5 Some one commented to me the other day that I must be an engineer because I couldn't spell "privilege."
57.7	Unprincipled engineer	IOSG::DUTT	Nigel Dutt	`Fri Aug 21 1987 14:11`	3
	We all received our new business cards the other day, and at least six of us now have 250 cards calling us "Principle (sic) Software Engineers".
57.8		MYCRFT::PARODI	John H. Parodi	`Fri Aug 21 1987 14:37`	8
	> We all received our new business cards the other day, and at least > six of us now have 250 cards calling us "Principle (sic) Software > Engineers". I guess that's ok, as long as they include the "(sic)." JP
57.9	sic indeed	ERASER::KALLIS	Raise Hallowe'en awareness.	`Fri Aug 21 1987 15:24`	9
	Re .8: Or that it means we create software that contains principles. :-P Steve Kallis, Jr.
57.10		MYCRFT::PARODI	John H. Parodi	`Fri Aug 21 1987 16:20`	8
	> Or that it means we create software that contains principles. How silly of me. Of course they were referring to rule-based, that is, AI software. Thanks, Steve... JP
57.13	****ware engineer	DECSIM::HEILMAN	Speak softly and wear a loud shirt	`Fri Aug 21 1987 18:20`	9
	Speaking of software engineers, I was recently in a local department store and filled out an application for a charge card. In the "Position" blank I filled out "Software Engineer". The person looking over the form had evidently forgotten their glasses (or couldn't read my handwriting) as they were double-checking my data by reading it out loud. Upon encountering my "position" they asked me what it was a "giftware engineer" does. Maybe in a large department store there is such a position! :-)
57.14	Speaking of meta-nits	TKOV52::DIAMOND		`Wed Feb 07 1990 11:23`	7
	Re .0 > Than to just walk off the job and not give a dam. In fact, this is the correct spelling, and it is not blasphemous. Most English speakers make a mistake because they believe that archaic Dutch coins of small denomination are all bound for hell.
57.15	title	LEDS::HAMBLEN	QUALITY doesn't cost. It PAYS!	`Wed Feb 07 1990 17:51`	16
	<<< Note 57.14 by TKOV52::DIAMOND >>> -< Speaking of meta-nits >- Re .0 > Than to just walk off the job and not give a dam. < In fact, this is the correct spelling, and it is not blasphemous. < Most English speakers make a mistake because they believe that < archaic Dutch coins of small denomination are all bound for hell. Hmmm. The version _I_ heard was that the expression referred to a tinker's dam - a small lump of clay used to keep the molten solder in place while repairing a hole in a pot. Usually just thrown away after use, so of little value. Dave
57.16	There's also a Hell in one of the Scandinavian countries	LESNET::KALLIS	Pumpkins -- Nature's greatest gift.	`Thu Feb 08 1990 16:19`	11
	Re .14: >Most English speakers make a mistake because they believe that >archaic Dutch coins of small denomination are all bound for hell. Another nit: To quote William F. Buckley, Jr, "Hell is spelled with an initial capital letter because it's the name of a place. Like Scarsdale." Steve Kallis, Jr.
57.17	It isn't a match for British ale	PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Mon Feb 12 1990 08:54`	2
	The title of .16 reminds me that a lot of Northern European beer is hell if it isn't dunkel.
57.18		RUBIK::SELL	Peter Sell UIA/ADG - 830 3966	`Fri May 04 1990 18:11`	16
	Let me add a few hoary old chestnuts: (in)dependant for (in)dependent compatable for compatible vise versa for vice versa antinatal for antenatal allways for always usefull for useful compleat for complete site for cite ... I don't know why I bother? In fifty years' time they will be acceptable alternatives. :-( Peter
57.19		POOL::TRUMPLER	Fahrverknoten	`Fri May 04 1990 19:05`	5
	In some code I'm maintaining there's a function called CATAGORIZE >M
57.20	A little fishy, perhaps?	SSDEVO::HUGHES	Doin' the Shift-Click Drag ....	`Sat May 05 1990 00:27`	8
	Re: > <<< Note 57.18 by RUBIK::SELL "Peter Sell UIA/ADG - 830 3966" >>> : > compleat for complete unless, of course, your name is Isaac Walton ... -Jim
57.21	Red sales in the sunset	MARVIN::KNOWLES	Per ardua ad nauseam	`Fri Dec 14 1990 11:14`	7
	Is this a thinko or just a pun? "sails of the flagship VAX line" [WSJ - 12-dec-1990] Makes you wonder if VAX is the same sort of line as P&O. b
57.22		STAR::CANTOR	What's the dif btw a burro & a burrow?	`Fri Dec 28 1990 04:47`	6
	re .21 It doesn't look like either a thinko or a pun to me. I think it's a simile, or possibly a metaphor. Dave C.
57.23	in a manor of speaking	CSSE32::RANDALL	Bonnie Randall Schutzman, CSSE/DSS	`Tue Apr 23 1991 19:08`	8
	Seen in a work-related notes conference: "I thought CDD/Plus could be used in a distributed manor?" Now that's taking geographical distribution to its logical extreme! --bonnie
57.24	... even disks have home blocks ...	MODEL::CIUFFINI	God must be a Gemini...	`Tue Apr 23 1991 20:34`	4
	re .23 If CDD/Plus requires a carriage return here or there, why not a carriage house? :-)
57.25		NOTIME::SACKS	Gerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085	`Wed Apr 24 1991 22:07`	2
	"The [censored] Newsletter is a semi-bi-monthly newsletter produced by [censored] product management ..."
57.26	Gotta add these...	SOFBAS::TRINWARD	ZAPPA: `read my lips - no MORE taxes'	`Fri Jun 14 1991 22:11`	13
	My favorites include the attempts by (barely) English-speaking persons trying to sound more educated, by using foreign phrases; to wit: Oh contrair Exsetera (often used as, "and exsetera") ... but I gotta admit, I've seldom seen as much "lexical creativity" elsewhere, as I have in the last few weeks browsing in VAX Notes -- esp. check out some of the would-be "literate" areas (PROSE, for one)... Oh, well, back to the LP (Literacy Patrol) beat... ;*} - Steve
57.27	Scannos	STAR::CANTOR	Have pun, will babble.	`Tue Oct 29 1991 22:01`	11
	I think I have spotted a new word. In _Instant_Message_ #503 (Oct 6, 1991), the official newsletter of the New England Science Fiction Association, Inc., p. 3, the word 'scannos' is used: ... One more story needs to be typed in and I have two more to clean up to remove their "scannos" [_cf_ "typos"]. (Quotation marks, italics, and editorial marks are reproduced as in the original.) Dave C.
57.28	Silly me - I thought it was still 100%.	DTIF::RUST		`Sun Dec 08 1991 15:06`	7
	Here's an "I know what they _meant_, but..." factoid that amused me: "He found that since World War II the death rate for people over age 85 has dropped dramatically, especially for women, who have a longer life span." -b
57.29	No room for variance	CUPMK::SLOANE	Communication is the key	`Mon Dec 09 1991 06:41`	4
	The death rate for people over 85 has always been and will always be 1 per person per lifetime. Bruce
57.30		SSDEVO::EGGERS	Anybody can fly with an engine.	`Mon Dec 09 1991 08:06`	1
	I think that applies to people under 85 as well.
57.31		SHALOT::ANDERSON	Great gift idea!	`Mon Dec 09 1991 08:11`	4
	Hmmm, if that's how you guys understand death rate, how do you understand birth rate? -- Cliff
57.32		SSDEVO::EGGERS	Anybody can fly with an engine.	`Mon Dec 09 1991 08:16`	1
	Exactly the same, I guess: everybody is born exactly once per lifetime.
57.33	Once is too much...	ESGWST::RDAVIS	William Dhalgren	`Mon Dec 09 1991 09:37`	11
	> Exactly the same, I guess: everybody is born exactly once per lifetime. Not true. I know many people who were born again. Sometimes they were born again several times before they got it right or gave up. On the other hand we have Big Billy Blake who engraved himself "Born in 17??� and have died several times since". Ray �My apologies for forgetting the date.
57.34		NOTIME::SACKS	Gerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085	`Mon Dec 09 1991 12:01`	1
	Then there are people who die and are resuscitated.
57.35		JIT081::DIAMOND	Order temporarily out of personal name	`Mon Dec 09 1991 17:53`	2
	And in classical poetry, there are those who speak of having died, perhaps several times in one evening.
57.36		DTIF::RUST		`Mon Dec 09 1991 18:30`	4
	Ah, now, if the news article had discussed the "little death" rate for people over 85, perhaps I could believe that it was, indeed, dropping... -b (who, if she lives long enough, hopes to give _that_ rate a boost)
57.37	statistics prove it!	AUSSIE::WHORLOW	Bushies do it for FREE!	`Thu Dec 12 1991 16:41`	13
	G'day, Ahhh but.... As you get older, the probability of dying decreases.... look it up... very few people die between their 101st (101nth)and 102nd birthdays..... and even fewer between their 115th and 116th birthdays... derek
57.38		UNXA::ADLER	Rich or poor, it's nice to have $$$	`Fri Dec 13 1991 13:58`	4
	The famous artist met his death, Because he couldn't draw his breath. /Ed
57.39		JIT081::DIAMOND	Order temporarily out of personal name	`Sun Dec 15 1991 18:45`	3
	In winter, it should be easy to draw his breath. (Even indoors, in countries where residences aren't heated :-( )
57.40		XANADU::RECKARD	Jon Reckard, 381-0878, ZKO3-2/T63	`Mon Dec 16 1991 04:17`	6
	Re: .38 >The famous artist met his death, >Because he couldn't draw his breath. The bank president fired the artist he commissioned to paint his portrait because he couldn't draw interest.
57.41		SSDEVO::EGGERS	Anybody can fly with an engine.	`Mon Dec 16 1991 07:27`	1
	He said, "It was the principle of the thing."
57.42	re .41 howcum not '..pAL' instead of 'pLE'?? :-)	RDVAX::KALIKOW	(-: Celebraturi Te Salutamus! :-)	`Mon Dec 16 1991 08:45`	1
	... but oh yeah, I fergot that this was the Spellos note. nevermind :-)
57.43		XANADU::RECKARD	Jon Reckard, 381-0878, ZKO3-2/T63	`Tue Mar 10 1992 11:59`	13
	[mail forwards edited] DECspell. . . I have a spelling checker, It came with my PC; It plainly marks four my revue Mistakes I cannot sea. I've run this poem threw it, I'm sure your please too no, Its letter perfect in it's weigh, My checker tolled me sew.
57.44	Add to "decision was mute" and so on	TLE::JBISHOP		`Tue Oct 13 1992 14:01`	5
	I've recently seen "right-to-passage" used where "rite-of-passage" was meant, and "on-sight service" used (in a glossy ad!) where "on-site service" was meant. -John Bishop
57.45	Maybe they meant	RICKS::PHIPPS		`Tue Oct 13 1992 15:28`	3
	If they could see it, the could service it. 8^) Sorry.
57.46		PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Wed Oct 14 1992 01:37`	2
	Since we offer both DECsite and DECsight, I wonder how often we sell the wrong one?
57.47		COOKIE::EGGERS	Anybody can fly with an engine.	`Wed Oct 14 1992 22:38`	2
	Do we have a DECcite? A package, perhaps, for a city police department's traffic division.
57.48	I have a gut feel this might be a success.	PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Fri Oct 23 1992 05:16`	14
	PictureTel, Lotus - Developing video mail {The Boston Globe, 8-Oct-92, p. 51} PictureTel is announcing today an alliance with Lotus that will allow PictureTel's videoconferencing desktop system to work with Lotus Notes software. Under this agreement, the companies are exchanging software technology that will allow the two products to communicate. A person using Lotus Notes will be able to dial another person. That person's image will appear in a window on the computer screen - and the two can converse. If you want to leave a voice-mail message but want the caller to see you talking to him - you can leave a video message, too. "The real power is the liver part - when you want to make a decision ----- and you have the information contained in Lotus Notes, you can call your boss or subordinate and make a fast decision.
57.49		PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Fri Oct 23 1992 05:20`	6
	Somewhat along the same lines, though I think there might be a more appropriate note, yesterday Marks & Spencers opened a branch in Nice, their second branch in France (there is already one in Paris). Amongst other typical British items they were offering jackets made from Le vrai Harry's Tweed.
57.50		GAVEL::PCLX31::satow	gavel::satow or @mso	`Fri Apr 02 1993 12:51`	6
	Although we are very exited for Xxxx, as close colleagues of his ^^^^^^ we regret to announce that he has decided to leave the Digital XXX Department . . .
57.51		NOVA::FISHER	DEC Rdb/Dinosaur	`Tue Apr 06 1993 03:44`	14
	My favorite spelling lesson came when I was using a LISP based screen editer for a paper on context in character recognition a few decades ago. I noticed that I had used an a instead of an "e" in the word "occurance" so (the editer was under development) I checked the latest draft of the user's manual and found a global search replace command and gleefully typed SR /occurance/occurence/ and got the reply 17 occurrences of "occurance" replaced by "occurence" (Too bad I didn't have command recall and edit!) ed
57.52	Probably not exactly the right string, but... :-)	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Supplely Chained	`Sat Aug 21 1993 06:25`	7
	From the ::MARKETING notesfile... Compare the Compaq PRO running some game available on Nintendo; it would probably fair poorly even tho it costs 100x more relative to Nintendo. :-)
57.53		GIDDAY::BURT	Plot? What plot? Where?	`Tue Oct 05 1993 19:19`	6
	From the Newsletter at a Pre-School: "these events will co-inside with..."
57.54		DRDAN::KALIKOW	Technology hunter\gatherer	`Tue Oct 05 1993 20:02`	9
	Now that WOULD be ok, thus: Washington DC (Reuters): Augustus Flermp and Viktor Doofus were convicted of illegal dissemination of privileged securities information to the investment community in Federal Court today. The two co-inside traders were sentenced to four months confiement at the Danville (PA) Corrections, Tennis, Mah-Johngg, & Tiddlywinks Institution, to be served on weekends when weather does not permit golf.
57.55	co-inside incidents	GIDDAY::BURT	Plot? What plot? Where?	`Tue Oct 05 1993 22:24`	9
	re .-1 Ptui! My main gripe with the spelling is that the centre is supposedly a "learning" centre. "Co-inside" was not merely a typo, or an attack of linguistic cuteness. Chele
57.56		JIT081::DIAMOND	$ SET MIDNIGHT	`Tue Oct 05 1993 23:09`	7
	Re .54 >four months confiement Mr. Kalikow ought to be co-inside with them for dropping an apostrophe and misspelling "confinement" in addition to hypocritically taunting others who make typographical errors similar to the second of these.
57.57		GIDDAY::BURT	Plot? What plot? Where?	`Tue Oct 05 1993 23:34`	9
	re .-1 All in favour, say 1. Aye 2. eye 3. I 4. None of the above
57.58	Fair 'n square	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Technology hunter\gatherer	`Wed Oct 06 1993 05:01`	5
	Moi :->
57.59		SMURF::BINDER	Sapientia Nulla Sine Pecunia	`Wed Oct 06 1993 08:16`	1
	Say Louis.
57.60		NOTIME::SACKS	Gerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085	`Wed Oct 06 1993 09:13`	1
	But he's right! Confiement is an expression of disgust for prisoners.
57.61	Hey, belay that!! Take it to 1007.* s'il vous pla�t... :-)	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Technology hunter\gatherer	`Wed Oct 06 1993 09:56`	2
	However, we DO appreciate your support, and we ARE amused... :>
57.62	Seen in the UK	WELSWS::HILLN	It's OK, it'll be dark by nightfall	`Mon May 09 1994 10:09`	7
	The Guardian newspaper had a certain notoriety for its typos... ^^^ Read no further if you have sensitivities... So, imagine the mirth when they recently described someone as 'a cult'
57.63		JIT081::DIAMOND	$ SET MIDNIGHT	`Mon May 16 1994 03:03`	1
	Was it as if produced by a cult hand?
57.64		WELSWS::HILLN	It's OK, it'll be dark by nightfall	`Mon May 16 1994 04:42`	6
	Delivery of a Micra car was attempted to the President's Palace in Pretoria, South Africa. But it was meant to go to ... Nissan Main Dealer
57.65		AUSSIE::WHORLOW	Bushies do it for FREE!	`Wed May 18 1994 16:54`	5
	ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh grown! djw magic!
57.66		NOTIME::SACKS	Gerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085	`Wed May 25 1994 12:57`	17
	RISKS-LIST: RISKS-FORUM Digest Weds 25 May 1994 Volume 16 : Issue 09 Date: Tue, 24 May 94 13:08:26 -0700 From: Martin Minow <[email protected]> Subject: Call Your OPERATER! From rec.humor.funny, but it belongs in Risks, too... (True) In an effort to snag more long distance telephone calls (charged to a credit card or a third number), AT&T reserved the toll-free number 1-800-OPERATOR. Not to be outdone, and perhaps knowing the public better, MCI reserved the number 1-800-OPERATER and has been scooping up calls intended for its arch-rival. Walter C. Daugherity Texas A&M University [email protected]
57.67	A clear rule?	KOLFAX::GOODMAN	I see you shiver with antici.........pation!	`Mon Jul 24 1995 11:25`	12
	Regarding possesive pronouns, I saw a letter to the editor that was more clear than any other explanation I've heard. Paraphrased, it said that possessive pronouns never have an apostrophe, whether you're talking about "his", "hers", "theirs", "yours", or "its". I think I've actually seen "her's", "their's", and "your's" written, but the day I see "hi's" written for "his" will be the day that I move to France and forswear any connection with English. :^) Cheers, Roy
57.68		AUSSIE::WHORLOW	Bushies do it for FREE!	`Mon Jul 24 1995 19:14`	12
	G'day, My, He's getting hi's knickers in a twist, isn't he? Bye Roy... derek ;-)
57.69		LJSRV2::KALIKOW	Hi-ho! Yow! I'm surfing Arpanet!	`Mon Jul 24 1995 20:14`	7
	Poor fellow doesn't realize that an accepted alternative punctuation of our Mother Tongue is Engli'sh It's twue, it's twue!
57.70		GIDDAY::BURT	DPD (tm)	`Mon Jul 24 1995 21:42`	8
	Language is what bwings us together. Chele
57.71		JRDV04::DIAMOND	segmentation fault (california dumped)	`Tue Jul 25 1995 18:29`	1
	Ya mis'pelled "bwing's" and "u's".
57.72		GIDDAY::BURT	DPD (tm)	`Tue Jul 25 1995 21:03`	3
	s'orry s'ir.
57.73	Herb Caen calls us(me) the "apostrophe police"	KOLFAX::GOODMAN	I see you shiver with antici.........pation!	`Wed Jul 26 1995 07:20`	10
	Saw a problem report the other day that said something very close to "The user's must then reboot before they can service any more customer's". AUGH. Didn't Dave Barry say that the an apostrophe is used in modern English to mean "a S is coming"? Roy
57.74	That reference is ...	KERNEL::MORRIS	Which universe did you dial?	`Thu Jul 27 1995 08:10`	9
	Re .73 Check out HYDRA::DAVE_BARRY 185.0 Press KP7 or the SELECT key to add this conference in the unlikely event that you haven't already got Mr Dave's conference in your Notebook. Jon