Conference moira::parenting

    Another one:
    
    The son (around 8 or 9) of my husbands coworker was looking at the
    icicles hanging from the overhang of their roof when they let go and
    hit him in the head.  The doctors did all they could be the child will
    have brain damage.
    
    Seeing all of the icicles here in the New England area makes this an
    important reminder.  Kids are fascinated by things like this!
    
    sandy

    
       .1  That's so sad. I live on the 3rd floor and when I was passing
    the second floor porch I noticed a lot of icicles hanging. I went
    on the porch and knocked them down because I got this feeling that
    if someone was walking out of the house down below they could be
    hit by one if it started melting and fell. After reading that story,
    I'm so glad I did! Not only because it could have hit me, but the
    children in the building!
    
        Rosie
    

    - Keep your toilet seat cover down (Make this a habit for a 
      life-time, you *NEVER* know when a toddler will visit).
      Toddlers have toppled in head-first and drown.  Dear Abby
      had a very sad letter from a mother who had lost her son
      that way.  My newspaper was unusually wet that night.
    
    - Remove draw-strings from winter clothing.
      I've read of two cases where children have died.
      (One ten year old was dragged when the school bus door caught
       the drawstring, so it doesn't just happen to young children.)
    
    - Don't put your child's bed up against a window where they
      can accidentially push out the screen in the summer and
      fall out.  There are safety devices you can buy for windows.
      Eric Clapton lost his son out a ten story window.
    
    - Don't allow your children to play with ropes, unless you are
      *RIGHT* there.  There was a child in Sunday's Boston Globe
      (2?) who was found unconscience.  She had been playing with
      a scarf of a visitor.  It doesn't look good for her.
    
    - No peanut butter, grapes or peanuts for the real young ones.  
      They can't fully swallow the peanut butter and it could choke
      them and the grapes can get caught in their throats.
    
    - Cover your raised heath with a thick sleeping bag when young
      children are playing around it.
    
    - My older kids (8-10) think it is OK to put things in their
      mouths (paper clips, etc).  OVER MY DEAD BODY! 
    
    - BIKE HELMETS or no bike, but it's now the law in Massachusetts.
    
    - No sledding on inflatible tubes, one of my sisters is an
      Emergency Room nurse and she phoned me and asked me to 
      promise her I'd never buy one.  
    
    - Teach them young, only "walking feet" and "holding hands"
      in parking lots.  
    
    - Maybe now's a good time to check all your outlets and make
      sure that they have child safety caps on them.  Pick some
      up while you are buying your snow roof rake!
    
    - Keep kids away from borrowing in snow banks, period.  I've
      read of snow plows that are pushing snow further off the
      road on clear sunny days.  Children have been killed that
      way.  And some tunnels have simply collapsed while children
      were playing away from the roads.
    
    - AND NO WALKING ON RIVER ICE!  IF YOU DO, YOU ARE STUPID!
      (I only use the word "stupid" with my kids when I'm driving
      home very important [life saving] statements.)  Pond and
      Lake ice are safe if you are with an adult and safety 
      equipment (rope/ladder) are near by.  A 53 year old man
      drown this month in Massachusetts walking out on river ice
      to save his two dogs.  His 28 year old daughter ended up in
      the river, too.  The man died, the daughter was rescued and
      the dogs got to shore, too.  I read these stories to my kids
      and tell them our pet dog is not worth loosing your life over.
      

    re. -1 I've heard that the inflatable tubes for sledding are dangerous,
    but why?  I saw some children over the weekend using them and I
    couldn't figure out what the difference is between a sled, tobagan, or
    something like that.
    

    From what I understand the inflatable tubes take bumps differently and
    children are thrown off of the sled and don't always land safely.  The
    emergency rooms are seeing a lot injuries (minor to serious or life
    threatening) because of them.
    
    sandy

    I hadn't heard it before, but read it the note before Tina's and have
    the same question she asked. Why are the inflatables more dangerous 
    than other snow sliding things?  My sister has the inflatables for her
    her children, these are made specifically for snow, are donut shaped 
    with a covering across the middle and a handle on head side. If they 
    are dangerous, I'd like to let her know, and let her know why.

    Leslie

    
        After reading the list of dangers we see and don't realize until
    later I thought of one.
    
       When my boys were pre-teens they were in the same bedroom and it
    was a rather small bedroom. We bought a bunk-bed. The top bunk had
    a sliding guard rail. The older boy slept up there and he was forever
    sliding it to the end and leaving quite a large opening. Well, one
    night the husband walked past the bedroom and saw the child falling out
    of the top bunk. He ran and caught him just as he hit his head on
    the bureau, caught him in time to lighten the blow. The child was
    taken to the hospital because he immediately started bruising
    around the ear and face. He was lucky though. He had broken several
    blood vessels close to the ear and that's why he bruised so quickly.
    No damage. In thinking of what would have happened if the boy hadn't
    been caught in flight. He would have certainly been seriously injured.
    
       I would say for parents who use a bunk bed, make sure the guard
    rail is always in a position where the child can't fall out. If it's
    loose fix it immediately. Of course after that day we took the bed
    right down and didn't care for the crowded floor space anymore. I was
    too scared to let either one sleep on a top bunk. I had always
    'assumed'  that my son put the guard rail in the proper place and
    that he wasn't in any danger of falling. Children don't always think
    'danger'. I think just a little precaution in checking it can save
    a serious accident. 
    
        Rosie

    I think another reason the inflatables are dangerous is that you
    can't steer them!!!!!
    
    We have them but we only use them in our yard.  The rule is, FALL OFF
    ON PURPOSE if you're heading anywhere near the house or a tree.  (Why
    don't more people do this??  A sled/toboggan/tube is replaceable;
    people AREN'T.)
    
    Leslie

I don't mean to detract from the seriousness of the things listed here, but
let's be honest, living is a dangerous thing.

IF you take your child out in a car with barely a second thought, you are
exposing that child to a far higher risk of accident or death than most of
the things so far mentioned.

It is wise to be aware, but at the same time, you cannot cocoon kids away
from all the dangers of life.  To me it is far wiser to try to teach your
children of the dangers of things than to keep them from them.  There are
lots of things I'd have never learned were it not for the learning of the
dangers and trying.

For example, I was literally playing with live 110 V electricity at about
age 8 ... with light flashers and morse code etc.  I had learned how to
show proper respect for live terminals, and in all the 36 years since, I
have only had "shocking" electric shocks a handful of times ... especially
considering electricity was my livelihood for many years ... and I had to
learn "live line working".

Don't hide your kids from danger ... teach them about the dangers.  They'll
only get hurt by yet another one that you never thought of!

Stuart

    It's true that you have to teach your children about dangers, but you
    have to be aware of them yourselves.  That's the reason I brought up
    this topic.
    
    sandy

    Stuart,
    
    Reminds me of one of the differences between my parents (made it easy
    for me to understand their divorce): my dad gave me a jackknife when
    I was 7.  Mom flipped out (but let me keep it); Dad's reasoning was,
    "So she cuts herself, she learns that knives are sharp."
    
    The episode impressed me because Dad showed trust in me (and Mom's
    alarm probably increased my caution).  I ended up being closer to the 
    "go play in traffic" end of the spectrum as opposed to "live in a
    bubble".  (Though you'd never catch me bungee jumping, and IMO rock
    climbers have rocks in their *heads*!)
    
    Leslie 

    The inflatible tubes are not steerable, I assume.
    
    Good point on the bunk bed!
    We have bunk beds in our lake house.  I heard our
    friend's 8 year old whimpering in the bed room.
    I went in to check on the sound.
    He had slipped through the top bunk guard rail
    and was *HANGING* by his chin (face up and feet
    almost touching the bottom bed).  Scarey!
    

    I'll keep that in mind about the tubes, but..... we used to go like
    holy hell on the tobagan (sp?) when I was about 8 - 10 and we weren't
    strong enough to steer it.  We also had a real bob sled and when there
    was crust on the sno we used to *fly*.  Looking back we probably should
    have been killed somewhere along the line with these things.

Sandy,

I don't disagree, and I think you are right in helping everyone see the
dangers that we may not see in everyday things ... but my own impression
over the years is that there are a lot of parents out their now cocooning
their children and thus robbing them of other vital learning experiences.

When I was a child, kids literally roamed the neighbourhoods ... now you
hardly see them out in their own yards!

Stuart

Something I never thought about until lately...bookcases.

	Kids tend to climb on bookcases to get at the top shelves.
If the bookcase is not stable enough it could tip over and fall
on them. It's a good idea to check the stability of the bookcases
in the house or anything else they could climb on and tie them up
to the wall whenever possible.

<Harold>

I believe the issue with the tubes is that because of the air, if they hit a 
bump it magnifies the bounce and the child can get "thrown" from the tube.   

On a regular sled, if you hit the same bump, you get a good jolt, but don't go 
airborne.  

    
    re: sledding
    
    When I was 8 years old, I broke my femur on a steep hill when I
    colided with the remnants of a frozen snowman.  It had just snowed
    and I was "breaking a new trail".  I aimed my sled to go down
    the hill, aiming past the snowman.  I then went feet first on my
    stomach to avoid getting snow in my face.  Seconds later, I colided
    with the snowman, flew up in the air, then spent the next 6 weeks
    in the hospital with my leg in traction.  
    
    So... point here... teach your children that just because you aim
    a sled doesn't mean it will go where you aim it.  As parents, you
    should supervise of particularly steep hills and check all sledding
    courses for obstacles like a frozen snowman.
    
    re: food
    
    Spaghettio's with meatballs or with hotdogs are a chocking hazard.
    Make sure to cut all meatballs or hotdogs in half.
    
    Karen
    

    RE: Back a few - Grapes - slice them lengthwise, or otherwise "break"
    the skin.
    
    RE: Tubes .... how many people have gone to the emergency room with a
    broken tail bone whilst sledding on a "traditional" sled??  Well, I
    never went to the emergency room, but busted it - as did Mom.  I'd only
    ever sled on a tube these days.  
    
    No, you can't steer them much (but you can't steer those flying-saucer
    disks either), and they do have quite a bounce to them, but just once
    down them mandates you'll hold on tight on all the rest of the rides.
    
    POINT: Roby Park in Nashua has "mogul"-like trail.  The kids were down
    them on tubes and regular sleds.  The tubes were awesome.  On the
    regular sled, Chris got thrown from his sled, and landed on the edge of
    the hard plastic, bent up his glasses, and was quite dizzy for a while.
    I think he'd much rather have landed on a tube - plus it also absorbs
    some of the "SHOCK" of the hard bumps, and smooths the ride a lot.
    
    They're  cool - you should try them!! (-:
    
    Two other hidden dangers;
    
    Iron pills - can be fatal to young ones
    Cigarette butts - same.  
    
    Keep your ashtrays empty and out of reach (better yet, stop killing
    your kids by smoking around them).
    
    I'm more like Stuart - not big on precautions, but real big on TEACHING
    them.  And no gun gets aimed at ANY person, no matter how sure you are
    it's a toy gun.  (well, I guess we bend that one with water guns...)
    
    

    
    I read "somewhere" a long time ago that the old fasion sleds 
    that you can steer are the safest.   We went sledding with a friend
    who had one.  However, she's five and didn't even know it could steer 
    let alone try to steer it.  It really flew.
    
    Teri 

    My friend recently looked into her 3-year-old's room just in time to
    see him jump from the bed with the blind-cord around his neck.  She got
    there just in time to grab him as he was starting to choke.
    
    She (like all of us) had read about the dangers of those cords, but
    when the room was baby-proofed for him he was a baby and had not access
    to anything that hign.
    
    She tells me they now have cords that will separate when pressure is
    applied. 
    
    Check yours!

    The following may be obvious to an adult, but it certainly wasn't to
    this former youngster:
    
    Teach kids never to ride a sled "pig-pile" style with multiple riders
    heaped on top of one another.  Those on top might have plenty of 
    time to bail if they anticipate ominous trees quickly approaching, 
    but the poor "pig" on the bottom probably won't.  
    
                                      - LL the "Ouched Oinker"

    It's not funney, but I do have to chuckle when I see things like the
    tolet seat precaution.
    I'm sure there have been infants that drown in a tolit, but think about
    it, if the child is strong enough to get themselves into the tolit,
    then they can simply lift the seat, can't they?  The better precaution
    is for parents to keep an eye on infants!  Why on earth would they be
    in a bathroom, alone?
    
    I gotta agree with Stuart.  There are a lot of dangers, the biggest is
    lack of common sense in parents.  The second is when a parent will not
    take simple courses in first aid and CPR.  This should be manditory
    before issuing a license to have sex.
    
    then wait till they get older and drive.  you can make all the rules
    you want until they get out of sight of the driveway.
    
    ed
    

    
        We can do a lot for our children by way of precautions, but
    sometimes there will be days when something could STILL happen. The
    important thing is to be aware of what's going on and make every
    effort to keep an eye on the children. BUT there are times when
    you can take your eyes off a child for just a moment and that moment
    can be fatal......
    
    
         I can remember when we lived on the 3rd floor and the 3 children
    were all playing in a bedroom togethere. I decided to do the dishes.
    While I was washing the dishe my oldest who was about 8 years old came
    running into the kitchen saying that Johnie was hanging out the
    window! Johnie was about 4 years old at the time. He decided that if
    I wasn't going to let him out he was going to go via the window. He
    took the screen out and must have realized that it was a bit high
    and no way to go down. There had to have been an angel holding on
    to him because he was hanging there! I ran and grabbed him. AFter
    that, instead of putting the windows up, I put the screen up and both
    windows down. It was the summer time and I certainly didn't want to
    have to close the windows, but the screens were too easy to remove.
    He probably would never have tried that again, but who knows? How
    many times do we hear of children falling out of windows. Kids
    NEED constant supervision. some more than others. Little Johnie
    was a VERY hyperactive child and into all sorts of 'dangerous' stuff
    that other children probably wouldn't have even attempted.
    
        Another time I took 'little Johnie' to the grocery store. The
    carriage didn't have a seat, the carriages were very large and
    'none' of them had seats. a parent had to either put the child in
    with the groceries or let him walk. There was no way that little
    Johnie was going to walk, he would have been 'running' wild. Well,
    I was checking out the prices on some items when I thought I smelled
    'bleach'. I turned just in time to see 'little Johnie' starting to
    take a drink of the bleach. I got that from him just in time and
    his remark was "I'm so thirsty!" EVen the smell didn't stop him
    from wanting a drink! My other children would have said. "Ick, that
    stinks I don't want any!"  Little Johnie, gosh that kid! He even
    stuck things in wall sockets! I had to cover everything up, had
    to tie up the refridgerator, had to put high hooks on the bathroom
    and pantry door. I even slept on the floor with him sometimes if
    that was where he was sleeping. I had to be with him 24 hours a
    day! Some kids are just tooooooo much!
    
    
           Rosie

    Another item to be aware of is the 5 gallon buckets. These are the
    buckets you can buy laundrey detergent in bulk. After it is empty,
    people will use these to wash cars, etc. They are made not to tip over,
    so when a toddler falls in head first, they can not tip the bucket over
    to get back out. I believe that this is the same concern with toilets.
    When you see a toddler fall head first into something, you realize that
    this is a real possiblity. I was right next to my son when he almost
    fell head first into the bathtub as I was filling it up. I was less
    than 2 feet away, and it happened in a second.
    
    I should also mention that the plastic plugs used to plug up an outlet,
    can also be a choking hazard. I had it happen that my cleaning person
    took one out, set it on the floor to plug in the vacuum, and of course
    my toddler immediately found it. As a parent, I'm sure we know not to
    leave these in reach of children, but visitors to your house may not
    be aware.
    
    LB
            

> I should also mention that the plastic plugs used to plug up an outlet,
> can also be a choking hazard. I had it happen that my cleaning person
> took one out, set it on the floor to plug in the vacuum, and of course
> my toddler immediately found it. As a parent, I'm sure we know not to
> leave these in reach of children, but visitors to your house may not
> be aware.

  They're too big to be an official "chocking hazard", even
  with the "prongs" broken off; they won't fit into a toddler's
  airway. But I can see where they'd get popped into a mouth and
  cause at least a momentary problem, and I suppose they might get
  swallowed.
                                   Atlant

    
    
    Re: plugs are too big.
    
    I disagree.  The general rule for determining if something
    is a choking hazard is if it can fit through the toilet
    paper roll, it is.  These can definately fit, at least
    the ones in my house.
    
    BTW, the small, square Duplo fall are considered a choking
    hazard if you apply that rule.  The age on these is 18 months
    and up.  However, I really don't see how anybody, even an
    adult could swallow one of these!  Those square points would
    make it impossible!
    
    Question about popcorn... at what age is it no longer a
    choking hazard?  
    
    Karen

  The "official" test tube has a smaller aperture than the
  opening in a US-standard toilet paper roll, as does your
  toddler's trachea and, in particular, larynx.

                                   Atlant

    RE. a few back...
    
    Many times I think, "well if you're watching them carefully,
    how could this happen".  As the case when someone tried chastising
    me for using a walker.  Their friend's son fell down a flight of
    stairs and lost an eye (he was in a walker).  I found myself thinking,
    "well, come on!  We're talking stairs and walker here.  EVERYONE 
    knows the danger there".  I felt the same when reading the story
    about the toilet.  Like, "how long was that kid out of your sight????"
    
    But you know....  it doesn't take long for some accidents... the
    blink of an eye.   I had my nephew burn his hands on a wood stove
    right in front of me.  I was watching him intently, someone showed
    me a Christmas card saying, and that was all it took.  That second
    or two it took for me to read the inside of the card.  
    
    Last night I was coloring with Angeline, a call came in.  I found
    out a friend had died.  Next thing you know, Angeline is coloring
    my ottoman.
    
    I truly believe a lot of these split second accidents can be traced
    back to something just that simple.  A phone call... taking your
    attention away just long enough.  I generally don't even answer it
    when Angeline is up, letting my machine take the call.  But, like
    last night, there are times when that phone catches you up.
    
    None of us can know how these things happen until we're there.  And
    I myself am ashamed of the times I've judged.
    
    						cj *->     

<    if the child is strong enough to get themselves into the toilet,
<    then they can simply lift the seat, can't they?  

It's not strength.  There's any number of ways a toddler can get into a 
toilet, and the problem is that they go head first, and can't get out.  Their
feet are up in the air, and his/her head is heavy, and they drown.

As for the inflatable tubes, a little girl in Acton, MA just severely 
fractured her skull because of one.  The Beacon (newspaper) gave a detailed 
explanation of why this happens more with the inflatable tubes.  I don't
recall the details, but it did have to do with how they bounce when they hit
a bump, as others have mentioned. 

       Carol

    Not sure if they make these anymore, but watch out for concrete bird
    baths -- the kind where the bowl simply rests on the pedestal.  Many
    years ago our neighbors' 3-year-old grandchild pulled on the edge of
    theirs to peer inside, but the bowl part toppled over on her.  She
    died of internal injuries.  
    
    I've long since moved away, and our new neighbors have a concrete
    bird bath in their back yard.  When I mentioned the possible hazzard to
    them, they didn't seem concerned even though they have two small boys who
    play near it all the time.  These parents are usually very concerned
    for their children's well-being so maybe I'm overreacting to a freak 
    accident that happened years ago.  Is this still a possibility with the
    way bird baths are constructed today?
    
                                            - LL
    

Just becuause you have the little plug-in safgety caps on your outlets, 
don't get a sense of confidence.  At Gymboree the other night I watched 
my 19 month old daughter pluck one out of the outlet easier than I can!
I think I'm about to invest in something a bit more secure.

Irene

There is a company somewhere that sells child safety equipment, and they don't
recommend the outlet plugs.  They sell outlet cover plates with permanently
attached sliding covers for the outlets, which they say are significantly
safer, much easier to use, and good for general use rather than just for child
safety.  (Sorry, I don't know the name or location of the company.)

						Brian

    I have some of those and I think they are from the Safety First
    company.  The only problem with them is that it is impossible to put
    some of the heavier plugs into them (like an AC adapater type).
    
    Otherwise, they work very well and I like the default being safer.  If
    you have a kid who pulls out a cord, the plate retracts and your child
    is safe.
    
    judy  

    re <<< Note 1078.32 by PERFOM::WIBECAN "Harpoon a tomata" >>>

>They sell outlet cover plates with permanently
>attached sliding covers for the outlets, which they say are significantly
>safer....

    The Safety Zone catalog has these. I don't have the phone number but
    1-800-555-1212 should have listing.

    Lisa

>>    The Safety Zone catalog has these. I don't have the phone number but
>>    1-800-555-1212 should have listing.

The handy-dandy WWW 800-number listing (http://att.net/dir800/) shows the
Safety Zone at 800-999-3030.

re: safety and popcorn

I'm not really sure at what age popcorn is considered less of 
a choking hazard, but we initially (18 months?) would tear off
the white fluff and give that to Noelle.  As she grew older,
we showed her the kinds of popcorn that we didn't want her to
eat.  When she started showing them to us and asking us if
it was okay, we began to allow her more freedom in choosing
her kernels.  Even at 3 1/2, I believe there's still a hazard --
it's one of those trade-off decisions.  We've let her eat peanuts,
but we hand them to her one at a time and tell her to chew them
carefully.  

We still don't allow hard candy (except the occasional lollipop).
I think 6 or 7 is the "magic age", but then you read about some
adult dying by choking on a piece of steak and you realize that
eating can be hazardous (only half :-).

- Deb B.

    RE: CJ's comments a few back.
    
    I agree that it only takes a spit second for an accident to happen, 
    which is why I believe that precautions are so important. When my son
    went head first into the tub, I was RIGHT THERE. I was filling up the
    tub, trying to get the temp just right. He was standing next to me and
    all of a sudden there he goes, head first. If anyone saw Funniest Home
    Videos the other night, a toddler was feeding ducks with her mom right
    next to her. Before you know it, she went head first into the lake.
    Personally, I didn't find that too funny.
    
    Another recommendation is water temp. I live in an apartment complex
    where I can't regulate how hot the water is. And it is HOT. Hardware
    stores sell a device that you can attach to your sink faucet and bath
    faucetthat will shut off the flow of water when the temp becomes too
    hot. (There is also a reset switch to start the water again if you
    actually want it that hot). The best recommendation is to set your
    water heater appropriately. I don't remember what the exact temp should
    be, perhaps someone else can shed some light.
    
    LB
      

    
    	I had an incident once which is not a "regular"
    
    	One day my daughter was playing with my shoes in closet
    
    	(she was not in the closet-just pulling things out) she
    
    	was about a year then...I think to myself that can't have
    	any harm...I go into the kitchen and come out to see
    	her feeding something to the dog...
    
    	I grab it out of the dogs mouth..it was a silicone packet
    
    	(litte white packet with pellets in it) that comes in shoe
    
    	boxes..(also electronic equipment, even drups (one was in 
    
    	my antibiotics and had broken open..)
    
    
    	So now when I buy shoes I rummage thru the box at the store
    	and throw them away there...kids love boxes..!
    
    	Check out any packaging..it shows up in the oddest places.
    
     	And it says right on it..DO NOT EAT!
    
     

It's silica gel.  It's probably not too dangerous (except perhaps as a
choking hazard) -- otherwise the warning would be more emphatic than
"do not eat".

    
    Since I just got back from the Drs office ....
    
    They recommend (the poster...) setting your hot water tank no higher
    than 120 degrees.  (which seems cool to me...)
    
    We have a floaty-boat that has a temp strip across the bottom, so you
    KNOW how hot the water is.  It's wonderful cuz now the older kids can
    run the tub too, and we all know that it's about the right temp (~100
    degrees seems comfy - 98-102, at 104 they howl (-;).
    
    I believe the deal with the silica packets is that they're designed to
    absorb moisture, and I was always under the impression that they're
    potentially fatal if swallowed.  Perhaps that's just my paranoia??
    
    Blankets are one you might not think too much about ... and oversized
    shirts.  I used to let Jonathan, wear his older brother's t-shirts to
    bed.  When he was ~15 mos, he'd gotten himself SOOOOooo tangled up in
    it because of it's extra 'girth', that he couldn't roll over or move. 
    He'd also gotten himself face-down.
    
    Blankets present the same problem.  My nephew was 18 mos old when was
    "killed by his parent's blankets".  The sitter put him to bed in their
    bed because he had a hard time falling asleep in the crib.  The baby
    had rolled over, and gotten himself caught in the blanket.  He
    eventually suffocated.  Make sure that your childrens blankets can
    "pull free" if need be.
    
    I also read a story somewhere about a boy who'd gone to bed (on his top
    bunk) with his robe on.  The robe had a tie-string.  During the night,
    the boy fell off the bed, but the rope got caught and he strangled.
    
    One of the funnier things, that I REALLY goofed on .... Chris was about
    3, and we were on our way out, in the car, ready to go.  At the last
    minute, I realized I'd forgotten something in the house.  He was in his
    car seat, so I didn't want to get him out, told him to wait there, and
    ran back in the house.  This is one of the most PASSIVE kids you'd ever
    have hoped to meet.  No problem.
    
    I come back out, and the car's rocking a little bit, and Chris is up
    front.  Looking scared!  Not sure WHAT was going on, and figuring he'd
    just been jumping around, he hopped back in his seat, and we left. 
    When we got back, he wanted to ride his bike, but the pedal was all
    bent up.  Only then did I realize what had happened.
    
    When I was in the house, he'd slid out of his seat, into the driver's
    seat, saw the keys in the ignition, and turned them.  The car's
    standard, so it JERKED forward (thus the rocking), and ran over his own
    bike.  Certainly explains why he was so scared!
    
    When my brother-in-law was little, his mom left him in the car, with
    the car running.  He put the car from parked, into gear, and 'drove' it
    through the yard, into a tree in the back yard.  She was only gone for
    a second.  And he was only 2.
    
    Always be aware of how a toy CAN be used, and not just as your children
    use them.  We've had play-knives that friends have used as throwing
    daggers, a rubber-band gun for display, that was used to shoot rubber
    bands and paper clips, water balloons tossed in the face, and water
    guns shot right in someone's ear/nose (intentionally).  Just because
    it's safe in your house, with your kids, doesn't mean it's safe ....

    We had a reminder of how fast a little one can discover that you did
    something that you don't usually do...
    
    Sunday we have a nice lazy morning.  I changed Aaron's diaper and
    changed him from his sleeper to his days clothes.  After I was finished
    let him get back up while I gathered up his sleeper and put away the
    lotriman (he's still on antibiotics so it's yeast infection prevention).
    I went into the kitchen to see what he was up to and saw him prying
    the cellar door open.  Apparently Steve went down stairs and didn't
    close the doors securely.
    
    I ran to Aaron but was too late.  All I could do was run down the stairs
    screaming for Steve as Aaron rolled to the bottom of the staircase. 
    When he reached the bottom Steve reached him before I did and picked him 
    up. That of course is the worst thing to do, fortunately it worked out ok.
    I took him and brought him upstairs and we checked him over (all this
    time he's crying, a good sign in my book).  His head was ok and he didn't
    seem to have any broken bones.  I called our clinics urgent care number and
    told them what happened and that we were going to bring Aaron in to
    have him checked over by the doctor.
    
    It's amazing.  Aaron went down 14 steps and all he got from this was
    a carpet burn over his lip that is healed already and a slightly
    swollen index finger (we had it x-rayed, there was no break) that he
    doesn't favor at all.  He has a guardian angel somewhere who's in
    traction with bumps and bruises all over him/her from protecting our
    little guy.
    
    We didn't put a gate on the cellar stairs because we always close the
    door when we go down there.  There is now a gate on the cellar stairs.
    
    Sandy

RE .41 - We had a similar incident, where my son, who was 3 at the time, slipped
on wallpaper scraps on our back stairwell where I was stripping the walls. The
stairs are fairly steep and have plastic tread covers which normally give extra
traction over the bare wood flooring. Naturally, he was not supposed to be
there, since it was a mess and we kept him away from that stairwell anyway, but
inquiring little minds want to know. He slid along his back feet first most of
the way down, probably over a dozen steps. Amazingly, he had no scrapes, cuts,
or bruises, not even on the back of his head, which surely must have bounced off
some stair edges. Yikes!

    Lisa has already fallen down a full flight of stairs, carpeted luckely.
    Mom didn't put up the gate upstairs. She (Lisa, not mom) cried for 
    a minute and went back to climbing up them, no worse for wear.
    
    On the cellar stairs door, we installed a door closer, the kind you'd
    find on a screen door, there is no forgetting to close it, it has a
    strong spring load. The only concern is that she doesn't get herself
    caught before it slams shut, but that is easier to police. 
    
    Gail

    How long did Mom cry!?  It took me a few minutes to gather my wits and
    calm down, as soon as I did tht Aaron did too.
    
    sandy

    
    We had the same mishap when Laura was @9.5 months old. She was 
    walking really well by then and was pretty quick. Kevin went
    downstairs and left the gate open. Next thing I hear ...bump,bump,bump
    THUMP! I flew down the steps with my heart in my throat. She was fine,
    not even a mark. We live in a split so it's actually a half flight of
    stairs but it was really scary. We learned the hard way to always make
    sure the gate is closed.
    
    Now she knows how to climb up and down the steps so I worry a little
    less. She's so cute when I let her go down, she'll sit down sometimes
    3 ft away and then wiggle backwards on her butt until she gets to the
    top step. At least she doesn't just step into midair anymore!
    
    That's been our only accident so far but when I think of all the things
    that can happen I start getting freaked out. So I just try to do the
    best I can and hope for the best. When I look back at my own childhood
    (youngest of 7) I'm amazed we all made it to adulthood. We grew up on a
    lake and talk about unsupervised! Nowadays they'd take your kids away
    for what was normal practice back then.
    
                          Barbara
    
    

    
    We had the same sort of thing when Jason decided to take his walker for
    a ride down the cellar stairs.  (The WALKER wasn't the problem - Mom
    leaving the cellar door open was the problem!!).
    
    We learned the hard way - you don't always remember IMMEDIATELY to
    close doors/gates, and that "second" can be all it takes.  For the
    gates, I made my own, with screen door-hinges, and we have a
    door-closer on the basement door.  The "default" position is closed, so
    no matter who goes through, when, the door/gate closes behind them. 
    With 2 older (forgetful) boys, this was an absolute necessity with
    Jonathan.
    
    Assume that you'll be 'lazy' or 'forgetful' - make whatever you use,
    SIMPLE to return to it's 'safe' state (if not automatic).
    
    

    When I was a kid, my younger brother was following me out the storm
    door of our house.  I released the door behind me, he held up his hands
    to push it just as the latch caught, and he flew through the glass.  He
    was ok, but my father replaced the lower half of the glass door with
    painted plywood until both of us were taller.  I suppose plexiglass is
    an alternative.
    
    Tony
    

    
    That's a good one - a friend of mine's child, lost a fingertip when he
    was just under 2.  The neighborhood kids were rushing out with his
    older brother, and 'the baby' was standing by the door.  As the last
    kid went out, the screen door slammed shut, and pinched the baby's
    finger in the door.  Since he usually cried when his brother went out,
    no one went to his rescue immediately, and when they did, it was very
    very bad.  Those edges are SHARP!!  Make sure your door-closer doesn't
    close too quick/hard....
    
    

    Oh god Patty, that sounds awful! (-1)
    
    Maybe this note ought to be changed to "Our children's horror stories"
    :)
    
    This past summer Paul was 18 months old and we vacationed on a remote
    island off Casco Bay in Maine.  There were no telephones, radios,
    water, stores, police, cars, anything.  I asked the people what we
    would do in case of emergency and he said that many people had cellular
    phones and that one year a child broke his arm so they called ahead and
    used someone's boat to get him ashore, which took 20 minutes and by
    then the ambulance was waiting at the dock.  The hospital was another
    30 minutes from there.
    
    Anyways... I was watching the lobster boats come in and I thought my
    husband watching our son, who thought that I was watching our son. 
    Paul started up the very steep (old house) stairs to follow daddy with
    cracker in one hand and a book in another.  He lost his balance and
    when I heard him fall and looked back he was going over the balcony and
    landed on a desk.  If the desk was not there he would of gone several
    more feet onto the concrete floor.  When I got to him I picked him up
    and then remembered that I shouldn't of.  It was such an instant
    reaction though -- to pick him up.  Anyways... there was blood all in
    his mouth.  I thought he lost his teeth because I couldn't see them. 
    We got some ice out and started to clean the area when we found that he
    had bit his bottom lip clear through to his mouth with his bottom
    teeth.  It was clear that stitches were required.
    
    I had to go next door to ask a women to borrow her phone.  She was so
    calm as I think about it and tried to help.  There was a doctor on the
    island who she phoned and he came over in about 20 minutes but didn't
    have his bag.  He took us ashore with his boat and then to our car,
    which is parked 1/4 mile up from the dock.  The women called the
    Freeport pedi and arranged for us to be seen the minute we arrived at
    his office instead of waiting in an emergency room.  
    
    Paul got four stitched and it was the most traumatic thing I have ever
    been through.  My husband had to hold his arms and legs while I held
    his head so the doctor could stitch him up.  It was over 95 degrees
    that day and the doctor was totally drenched when he finished almost an
    hour later.  It was difficult to hold Paul still and he had to cover
    his face so he didn't see the needle and stitches coming because he
    would of moved.  I can still remember his trembling voice sobbing,
    "Mommy Daddy Mummy Daddy".  He couldn't see us and the terror in his
    voice left me numb for days.  I still blame myself for not watching
    him, although I know that accidents will happen.
    
    When you ask Paul about his scar and his stitches he will proudly tell
    you, "ALL GONE".
    
    cj

    Heard on the news this AM that a little boy at day care was choked to
    death while sliding since the strings on his jacket somehow got caught. 
    This was somewhere in MA, I have not other details.  My heart goes out
    to this family.
    
    Julie
    

>    Heard on the news this AM that a little boy at day care was choked to
>    death while sliding since the strings on his jacket somehow got caught. 
>    This was somewhere in MA, I have not other details.  My heart goes out
>    to this family.

    Wasn't there another incident of this recently?
    I seem to remember a discussion about this.
    bob

    There has been a few incidents lately.  Such as the girl who's
    string got caught in the schoolbus door and got dragged to her
    death.
    
    We will hear more and more as it is becoming more visible (sadly).
    
    Kind of like the drowning in the toilet incidents.  
    
    						cj

<    Wasn't there another incident of this recently?
<    I seem to remember a discussion about this.

1078.3, 1078.40...

I believe there was also a discussion in =wn=, where someone said that we
couldn't protect our children from *all* hazards.  

According to the Boston Globe this morning, one mother who lost her 5 year
old daughter to drawstrings and a slide (like this recent tragedy) worked with
many corporations to get drawstrings taken off children's clothing.  I noticed
that a jacket we bought at Sears lately had had the drawstring removed.

      Carol

    Re: .53
    
    I also purchased a spring jacket for my 3 yr. old and it didn't have
    strings on it.  Like a dummy I said to myself "How come this jacket
    doesn't have strings on it?  Oh well, I'll buy it anyway, it's cute." 
    I'm glad I have the parenting notes to read, it really helps me stay
    aware of issues regarding children.
    
    Marianne

My kids' day care center had a sign prominently displayed this morning, telling
parents (a) remove all drawstrings from kids' clothing, and (b) any drawstrings
on clothing worn by kids to day care will be removed by the staff.

						Brian

    Carol, regarding the discussion about this issue in the other
    notesfile...
    
    What kind of annoyed me was someones attitude towards parents who buy
    clothes on a budget.  She was saying that if people would buy "quality"
    implying (to me) more expensive clothes, there wouldn't be a problem
    like this.  Now this past fall and winter when I was looking for coats
    for Aaron I saw $25 and $100 coats that had strings.  Does that mean
    because the $100 coat is "better quality" that that coat wouldn't
    strangle a child like the $25 coat. 
    
    For some reason I just don't buy this line of thinking.
    
    For what it's worth,  I also saw $25 and $100 coats that didn't have
    strings.  We decided on one that didn't have a hood and instead used a
    nice warm hat with earflaps that fastened with velcro.
    
    sandy
                                                          

<    For some reason I just don't buy this line of thinking.

Gee, I can't understand why.  ;-)
    
Another article in the Globe this morning talked about Venetian blinds and
how the cords easily strangle (which I'm sure is listed here also).  If you've
already got the blinds, what is the best way to fix them so they won't 
endanger your child?

      Carol

    
    	We've got clear plastic brackets attached to the window trim,
    	and wind the cords around the brackets.
    
    

    Carol,
    
    Cut the loop so you have two halves, instead of the loop.  This is the
    way VB's used to come.  You can hang tassles or something from the ends
    or wax them to keep them from raveling.  
    
    meg

    Thank you, Meg.  I was just looking at mine this a.m. thinking 
    what to do with them.  
    
    					cj

    I am just old enough to remember how they used to look
    
    ;-)
    
    meg

Re: Venetian blinds

I think the double cord used to raise and lower the blinds, not just the
cord(s) used to open and close the slats, could be a problem.  We have some
pull-cord (non-Venetian, maybe they're from Palermo :-) type blinds, and we
hang the cord up on the top of the blinds after we raise them.  That way,
nothing is hanging down below a height of about six feet.

Or maybe they don't raise and lower anymore, and I'm showing my age...

						Brian

    There is actually a "fix" for venetian blinds.  It's like a plastic
    "snap", and I've seen it advertised in the Drs office, and at places
    that sell them.
    
    Basically you cut the cord, then attach this plastic clip to 'reattach"
    the cord together.  If there's any 'real' amount of pressure put on the
    cord, the plastic piece comes unclipped, thus saving your child.  I
    suppose you could use several of them on one cord if you were really
    worried.
    
    We use shades .... of course occassionally we pull them down and they
    land on our heads - nothing's perfect (-:
    
    -Patty

    Yes, I just bought some of these at Home Depot in their home deco
    section.  Giving them to my daughter; so much to think about all the
    time.....have to be 10 steps ahead of them constantly!!
    
    Lorraine

    As if we don't have enough to worry about...
    
    I heard a report on the news this morning (well, I only half paid
    attention to it, Aaron gets most of my attention) that sites a
    government report regarding mini-blinds.  This isn't the one that talks
    about them as a choking hazard...
    
    Aparently lead is used in the manufacturing process.  When the
    mini-blinds are exposed to sunlight and the heat from it they start to
    break down and become covered with lead dust.  The concern is that
    children will touch the blinds, put their hand in the their mouth and
    ingest the lead.
    
    This is just a brief synopsis and may not be correct.  There will
    probably be something in your newspaper of choice or another news
    report regarding it.
    
    sandy

    Whoops I meant to say  "that cites a government..." instead of "sites a
    government...."
    
    sandy

    I heard this on the radio. It stated that Home Depot is removing about 500
     different brands of mini-blinds off their shelves on all their stores.
    
    Same thing about being a lead hazard.  Didn't hear much more than
    that.

    I heard that it was plastic mini blinds and the older style of
    mini-blinds.

    
    	The Consumer Products Safety Commission has reported that
    	lead is used in the manufacture of vinyl mini-blinds.  
    	Over time, the lead surfaces on the blinds in the form of dust.
    
    	The recommendation is that if you have children under six in
    	your home, that you remove all vinyl mini-blinds.  The exception
    	is the glossy type of vinyl blind - they are not considered
    	a risk.
    
    	The risk is in ingesting the lead by touching the blinds, then
    	putting fingers in the mouth.  The spokewoman said that 
    	inhaling the dust was not a risk factor (which is why the
    	recommendation is for homes with children under age six).
    
    	Home Depot is actually giving refunds to people that bought
    	their mini-blinds there, which I find quite admirable.
    
    	Karen
    

    


         Heard in the news this morning that a woman visiting from
     Sweden(?) had her daughter with her and the baby was sleeping.
     The mother wanted to eat lunch but didn't want to wake the baby
     up by bringing her into the restaurant so she parked the baby and
     carriage outside the window of the table she was sitting at.  The 
     cops came by, took the baby and arrested the mother.  Baby now
     with DSS.
                                        BJ

>
>         Heard in the news this morning that a woman visiting from
>     Sweden(?) had her daughter with her and the baby was sleeping.
>     The mother wanted to eat lunch but didn't want to wake the baby
>     up by bringing her into the restaurant so she parked the baby and
>     carriage outside the window of the table she was sitting at.  The 
>     cops came by, took the baby and arrested the mother.  Baby now
>     with DSS.
>                                        BJ


This is totally a normal thing to do in Europe ... outisde shops etc. you
often find a row of baby carriages ... Apart from the fact that there is
no room in the stores.  In Europe, this is NOT considered neglect ... and
the fact that she was visiting, how was she to know that this is considered
a mega no-no here.  Again police and DSS going overboard.

Stuart

There were more details in this morning's Boston Globe.  It said that
the baby was awake and crying, that it was cold outside, and that the
baby didn't have a jacket.

It also said that some of the patrons of the establishment went to the
parents (the mom's from Europe, but the dad's an American) and told them
these things and tried to get them to take care of the baby, but that
they refused.

      Carol

    >it was cold outside, and that the baby didn't have a jacket.
    
     The baby was under a blanket.

    Looks like the baby was returned to the parents today, but they still
    face a court date to see if this was actually a case of neglect, or
    cultural differences.
    
    Holly