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Conference hbahba::cam_sports

Title:Sports 93-96 Archive. No new notes allowed
Notice:Chainsaw's last standSPORTS_97
Moderator:HBAHBA::HAAS
Created:Mon Jan 11 1993
Last Modified:Tue Apr 15 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:302
Total number of notes:117855

143.0. "Veterans Day, 1993" by CAM3::WAY (You can't polish a turd) Thu Nov 11 1993 10:20

For me, this Veteran's Day is a little different than previous ones.
Bill knows why, and perhaps a couple other folks do too.   I hope the 
essay is okay......



			Veterans Day, 11 November, 1993


	He's old now, his once tall and lanky body bent by the weight
	of years piled on his shoulders like stones on a wall.  His hair, 
	once brown and full, is now snow white and thinning.  His hearing 
	isn't what it used to be, the small hearing aid giving a clue as 
	to just how bad it has gotten.

	But his eyes are bright and alive.  The same eyes that looked out
	over the blue-green Pacific waters, that watched the waves slip
	over the bow as their boat slipped under the sea to lurk and prowl
	the Japanese shipping lanes.  The same eyes that watched engine
	guages on the mid watch, that took the photographs of Japanese 
	ships, their backs broken by torpedoes, foundering, and sliding to 
	the bottom, that shot a roll of movie film of a rescue of a downed
	Navy flier.   Those same eyes that looked with longing and relief
	on Pearl Harbor, as their boat sailed proudly home.

	He never talks about it, and over the years the bits and pieces
	of stories that have been fitted together like a jigsaw puzzle
	by those of us who listen have been few and far between.  The
	stories, like the dog tags and dolphin pin and submariner's patrol
	pin, put into a box, on a closet shelf, put away in a dark corner
	of memory.  A dark corner not often visited.

	He quietly served, and our own growth and maturity have shown us
	that the stories of danger we thought so romantic and cool, when,
	as children we'd sneak out of bed and crouch on the stairway,
	listening to him and our Uncle open beers with a churchkey, and 
	tell stories, as only two men who have shared a common experience 
	can tell them, to each other, with unspoken understanding and 
	compassion, those stories were not romantic and cool, but stories 
	of horror and pain and fear, more gripping than any novel could 
	ever be.

	His is but one story among many.  His is but one gift, one small
	sacrifice among countless others, that range from the smallest, to 
	the most Supreme Sacrifice of all.  He is one in a long line, that
	stretches back to the first stirrings of revolution in Colonial
	times and carries forward to the young men and women of today, who 
	serve in places with names that sound just as foreign, and with 
	dangers	just as severe.

	Veterans.  Those who answered the call, whose deeds are often
	forgotten, whose gift to the rest of us often taken for granted. 
	There is no glory in war, there is only glory in the deeds of the
	men and women who serve, and preserve the freedoms that we all
	enjoy.
	
	Today, around the country, small American flags will flutter
	next to headstones, ceremonies will be held, the field drums muffled
	as the troops march into the Gardens of Stone, the haunting strains
	of Taps will echo on the November breeze, and new monuments will be 
	dedicated.  People will remember.

	And those who served, who sacrificed, will pull out that box of
	dusty memories, open the cover, and for a while remember what youth
	felt like in their bones, remember the laughter, the camraderie,
	and the common purpose, along with the sweat, the toil, the fear,
	and even the blood.   They will remember for themselves, and they
	will remember for those who can't, for those who gave all there was 
	to give.  

	And while they remember, we, too, should remember.  We should
	remember their deeds, their sacrifice, and their uncommon
	valor.  The honor we owe them is more than they could ever
	know, and more than we could ever, ever forget.
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name		DateLines
143.1should *NOT* be in the Junk Note though....CSTEAM::FARLEYCarol's wearing maternity clothesThu Nov 11 1993 10:433
    
    Most Excellent Note 'Saw.  Note-of-the-Year, no doubt about it.
143.2MKFSA::LONGHelp! I've lost my OBL and can't get up!Thu Nov 11 1993 11:455
	Thanks, Frank.


	billl
	USAF 72-82
143.3PATE::MACNEALruck `n' rollThu Nov 11 1993 16:394
�                -< should *NOT* be in the Junk Note though.... >-
    
    You may have a point there.  Maybe we should create a topic called
    'Saw's Sappy Holiday Essay Topic.
143.4It's gonna be published....CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdThu Nov 11 1993 16:4212
|�                -< should *NOT* be in the Junk Note though.... >-
|    
|    You may have a point there.  Maybe we should create a topic called
|    'Saw's Sappy Holiday Essay Topic.

Do me, Mac.

That baby is gonna be published.....  Inked the deal earlier today....


'Saw
143.6CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdThu Nov 11 1993 16:4910
>
> Where? In 'Highlights'?
>

No.  Not in 'Highlights'.  A few years ago they asked me to stop
submitting to them.  I guess they didn't like my satires on 
Mr. McFeely.....


8^)
143.7MSBCS::BRYDIEI need somebody to shove!Thu Nov 11 1993 16:502
 Seriously though, 'Saw. Where?
143.8CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdThu Nov 11 1993 17:003
A small, military oriented publication.....

'Saw
143.9PFSVAX::JACOBI weren&#039;t hidden, I were DELETED!!Thu Nov 11 1993 17:147
    
>>A small, military oriented publication.....
    
    Frederick's of Hollywood catalog, eh???
    
    JaKe
143.10Better late than everSWAM2::MASSEY_VIHow do you stuff a live turkey?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:306
    I was gonna say that JaKe!!!
    
    Could be that Tattoo Mag I saw at the base barbar yesterday too.
    They have some very interesting articles.
    
    Gin
143.11GWEN::ASHEDo you have to let it linger?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:362
    I thought you were going home to pack...
143.12SheeeeeeeshSWAM2::MASSEY_VIHow do you stuff a live turkey?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:385
    What Walt?  You keeping tabs on me now?
    
    I'm going I'm going
    
    Gin
143.13GWEN::ASHEDo you have to let it linger?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:395
    That's what you said in your last message... just send me the flight
    info... ok?
    
    Do live turkeys fly once they've been stuffed?
143.14(8^)PFSVAX::JACOBSend a self-abused, stomped antelopeThu Nov 11 1993 17:439
    
    >>Do live turkeys fly once they've been stuffed?
    
    I saw some pictures of Marines stuffing turkeys once in a "small,
    military oriented magazine" and it weren't with bread and onions and
    the like, either.
    
    JaKe
143.15buhhhhSWAM2::MASSEY_VIHow do you stuff a live turkey?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:447
    Relax Walt, I will be there.  It still have to get that one item from
    the cleaners.
    
    If a stuffed turkey can fly, then how did it get stuffed in the first
    place?
    
    Gin
143.16GWEN::ASHEDo you have to let it linger?Thu Nov 11 1993 17:441
    I'd guess that didn't involve Les Nessman...
143.17CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 09:186
Sheesh....

Instead of congrats I get bullshit and abuse?

I don't need this crap.  I guess I'll have to find some new folks
I call friends.......
143.18MSBCS::BRYDIEI need somebody to shove!Fri Nov 12 1993 09:326
 >> I don't need this crap.  I guess I'll have to find some new folks
 >> I call friends.......
    
    You thought we were your friends? What other crazy nonsense do
    have floating around that big head of yours?
143.19That essay deserves publishingCTHQ::LEARYCorporate Telecom Technology SolutionsFri Nov 12 1993 09:5713
    Most excellent 'Saw.
    
    Reminds me of a certain person who served on a DE in WW11, his brother
    who drove landing barges in the Pacific, and a third brother who
    served on Pork Chop Hill with the Gyrenes.
    
    Yassir, I remember one story this person told me, how he and his Navy
    bro met in 1946, not having seen each other since '42, and came
    walking down the street they lived on, arm in arm, seabags and
    Petty coats bedecked, surprising their family.  Salute.
    
    MikeL
143.20You may be right, I may be crazy....CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 10:0761
>    
>    You thought we were your friends? What other crazy nonsense do
>    have floating around that big head of yours?
>

Not you, Tommy...Them....  (Oh, I could borrow a line from King's "Christine"
but I'd get set hidden for sure)


Crazy nonsense --  well, let's see:

	o I believe that there WAS a conspiracy to kill JFK and that
	  the fatal and explosive shot came from the Grassy Knoll

	o I believe that the Universe is continually expanding and will
	  never contract.

	o I believe that a head shot from 1000 yards in high wind conditions
	  is one of the most elegant things an assassin can ever do.

	o I believe that beer is one of the finest things ever invented

	o I believe that if you work hard enough and you persevere
	  you'll only get shit on in the end.

	o I believe that Luke and Laura should never have come back
	
	o I believe that SKOAL is the work of the devil and that real
	  men chew Red Man.

	o I believe that everyone has 14� minutes of fame, not 15 like
	  Andy Warhol said

	o I believe that a bases loaded triple is one of the most exciting
	  things that can happen in a baseball game.
	
	o I believe that Erika Eleniak is one hot babe.

	o I believe that Fabio has implants

	o I believe that Coca-Cola, properly applied, will remove
	  Tammy Fae's eye makeup.

	o I believe that throwing yourself on a hand grenade to save your
	  friends is stupid -- you should always throw your no-brainer
	  project leader on the grenade instead.

	o I believe that the 12000 bottles of Bass Ale 13,000 feet down
	  on the floor of the Atlantic in the wreck of the Titanic is
	  still drinkable to this day.

	o I believe that reality is an illusion.

	o I believe that high maintenance women aren't worth the effort
	  you put into them, when you consider the return on your investment.


I guess that just about covers it.....


'Saw
143.21MSBCS::BRYDIEI need somebody to shove!Fri Nov 12 1993 10:126
    
     Bewtixt Sawman's syruppy essay and Leary's heartwrenching story,
    the faucet has been turned on and the tears are flowing. I don't
    think that I've ever been so proud to be an American. Well, of
    course there was that time we beat the dogsnot out of Grenada. I
    was pretty damn proud then.
143.22CTHQ::LEARYCorporate Telecom Technology SolutionsFri Nov 12 1993 10:1610
    Yabbut,
    
    That was the forties when men was men and women were damned glad of
    it.
    
    Shhhhh quiet Tommy, you'll wake up our British antagonist!
    
    8^)
    MikeL
143.23Red Man is fer sissies :*)GENRAL::WADEPull!Fri Nov 12 1993 10:366
    
    	Good stuff 'Saw.  Thanks for entering it.
    
    	However, Copenhagen roolz!  
    
    Claybone
143.24CTHQ::LEARYCorporate Telecom Technology SolutionsFri Nov 12 1993 10:4710
    COPENHAGEN!!
    
    You call yerself a homespun genuine Amuricain raidneck 'Bone?
    
    
    Why yer Alabammy forebears are turnin' in their RedMan graves.
    
    Fer shame!
    MikeL
143.25Ain't never chewed anything elseBSS::NEUZILJust call me FredFri Nov 12 1993 10:585

	Another vote for Copenhagen.

	Kevin
143.26Wrangle butts drive me nutsSWAM2::MASSEY_VIJust stuff me!!Fri Nov 12 1993 11:016
    Copenhagen rules!!
    
    Let's see a Red Man ride a bull.
    
    Gin
143.27CSC32::GAULKEFri Nov 12 1993 11:1312
    
    
     Hey, that garbage gives you, what is it, mouth cancer?
    	(and it don't matter which brand)
    
     Do that long enough, and your lips fall off.
    
      
    Just say NO to that junk
143.28REAL Chewin' pleasure....CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 11:2925
When I played ball I used to have a big ol' chaw stuffed in my cheek and
I got real good at spittin' that s___ all over the place.  

Never could stand what we called "dip" (skoal, copenhagen, crap like that).


Course, there was that one headfirst slide into 3rd base that time, when
the whole thing just took a ride right down my throat and into my stomach.
3rd base coach took a look at me as I stood up and he moved really quick.
I made sure I didn't hurl into the base coach box....

Then, before the game resumed, I got me a fresh one, and went on from
there....


Riders don't do Red Man cause all that janglin' around would send it 
out of their mouth -- one way or the other.  Hopefuly for them it'd
go OUT of their mouth, and not back down....


'Saw


PS  For fun, take a wad of Red Man, soak it in some Jack for a while
    then chew that.....
143.29CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 11:3016
>    
>    Why yer Alabammy forebears are turnin' in their RedMan graves.
>    

Nothin' like a grizzled old guy from Alabammy reachin' in his pocket,
getting out his plug and a knife, cutting a bit off the plug, poppin'
it in his mouth and puttin' the rest back...


Copenhagen indeed....  

Why, next thing you know, Claybone, you'll be tellin' me you use Quick Grits!


'Saw
143.30PATE::MACNEALruck `n&#039; rollFri Nov 12 1993 11:321
    Oh great, yet another Junk Note.
143.31CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 11:396
>
>    Oh great, yet another Junk Note.
>


Just lay back and enjoy it......
143.32GENRAL::WADEPull!Fri Nov 12 1993 14:2912
    
    	Red Man ain't plug.  You'ree talkin' 'bout Daay's Work or 
    	something like that.
    
    	Copenhagen is made in Nashville, TN Leary!  
    
    	Stevie_boy, quittin' chewin' is easy.  I've done it a thousand
    	times.  :*)  I'm flat out addicted to this stuff and really do
    	need to quit.  They say itt's tougher to give up than heroin.  
    	Any heroin users out there can verify this?
    
    Claybone
143.33BUUULLLLLL of the Woods !!! thats the oneSPECXN::BROWNReal Men only need 12 bitsFri Nov 12 1993 14:4110
	Bull of the Woods.  I myself was partial to Beech-Nut and I don't
mean chewing gum!!. 

  Hey Sawman  I had the same experience. Flipped over the 1st baseman, eat the
whole load. To make it worse three innings later some clown tries to run over
 me a home. Luckly I didn't swallow that one. I stopped chewing when behind
the plate after that one.  

  Cadzilla2
143.34CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 14:4729
>    	Red Man ain't plug.  You'ree talkin' 'bout Daay's Work or 
>    	something like that.

Red Man makes a plug now.  I don't remember what the other plugs are
called.
    
>    	Copenhagen is made in Nashville, TN Leary!  

Dip is for wimps [many 8^)]


    
>    	Stevie_boy, quittin' chewin' is easy.  I've done it a thousand
>    	times.  :*)  I'm flat out addicted to this stuff and really do
>    	need to quit.  They say itt's tougher to give up than heroin.  
>    	Any heroin users out there can verify this?
    
Yeah, I shoot up with horse all the time.  I've got tracks in places you
don't wanna know about.

Dip is harder to quit than heroin, for sure.  I mean, I can deal with the
runny nose, the aches and pains and lightheadedness, and crankiness I 
get when I can't get a fix, but man, I can't go an hour without dip.....


By the way, Clay, did I ever tell you about that land in Florida I was
hoping I could sell you????

'Saw
143.35CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 14:4918
>  Hey Sawman  I had the same experience. Flipped over the 1st baseman, eat the
>whole load. To make it worse three innings later some clown tries to run over
> me a home. Luckly I didn't swallow that one. I stopped chewing when behind
>the plate after that one.  


Yeah, that's the worst.

Fortunately thought, it doesn't really stay down there, it just kind 
of "bounces".

It hits bottom, and your stomach says YUKKO! and WHAM BLAM up it comes
and out, along with anything you had in your pre-game meal...

I played the outfield and never had a problem out there, including collisions.


'Saw
143.36Just remember: All things in moderation.RHETT::KNORRCarolina BlueFri Nov 12 1993 14:537
    Red Main has made a plug for years.  Personally I prefer Apple Jack,
    admittedly a wimpy chew.
    
    Nothin' like goin' out to walk the dawg late and night and have a chew.
    
    
    - ACC Chris
143.37Huh?CSTEAM::FARLEYCarol&#039;s wearing maternity clothesFri Nov 12 1993 14:5912
    
    
    >> Any heroin users out there.....
    
    
    Yabbut izzat anything like radion users?  So who uses hero's anyway
    besides noo yawk sandwich makers?
    
    I remain,
    always picking a hero instead of pita bread too
    Kev
143.38MSBCS::BRYDIEI need somebody to shove!Fri Nov 12 1993 15:0719
    
     Note 143.29                    
  
    "Nothin' like a grizzled old guy from Alabammy reachin' in his pocket,
     getting out his plug and a knife, cutting a bit off the plug, poppin'
     it in his mouth and puttin' the rest back..."

    
     Note 143.36                    
    
    "Nothin' like goin' out to walk the dawg late and night and have a
     chew."
    
     Yeah, there ain't nothing like having stank breath and spitting foul
     substances hither and yon. And thank goodness for that. Lip cancer
     stopped being cool in the '80s, boys.
143.39You & my wife oughta git together Brydie ....RHETT::KNORRCarolina BlueFri Nov 12 1993 15:281
143.40MSBCS::BRYDIEI need somebody to shove!Fri Nov 12 1993 15:302
 We have.
143.41Red Man leaf is for nancy boys!GENRAL::WADEPull!Fri Nov 12 1993 15:3211
    
    	I started dippin' before it was cool Tommy.  Quite an
    	accomplishment huh?  No stanky breath here.  I've got
    	my personal size janitor-in-a-drum right here in the
    	desk.
    
    	Enjoyin' this stuff makes it even harder to quit.  I'd 
    	better do it soon though or my boys will be copyin' dad.
    
    Claybone
143.42CSC32::GAULKEFri Nov 12 1993 15:3511
    
    
     re .39
    
    >> You & my wife oughta git together Brydie ....
    
      
      What brand does she chew?
143.43Rollin' Thomas!!!GENRAL::WADEPull!Fri Nov 12 1993 15:351
143.45PFSVAX::JACOBSend a self-abused, stomped antelopeFri Nov 12 1993 15:5411
    Ever seen a "chewer" with his "spitter", a styrofoam coffee cup, and he
    walks around with it everywear, and puts it down one day right next to
    somebody's styrofoam cup of coffee, and the coffee drinker grabs the
    wrong cup, not paying attention, takes a short swig, and technocolor
    yawns all over the place??????
    
    Saw it happen a year and a half ago, and the coffee guy is still
    plotting revenge on the chewer.
    
    JaKe
143.46CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdFri Nov 12 1993 16:0813
Chris,

You're cool.  I like that.  Take the dog for a walk and have a little
chew.  As Hawk would say, "I wanna party with you!"


I haven't chewed in a while, but it has fond memories...


What this country needs is more brass spitoons in bars.....


'Saw
143.47Just a wimp, I'm afraid...NAC::G_WAUGAMANFri Nov 12 1993 16:3513
    > Saw it happen a year and a half ago, and the coffee guy is still
    > plotting revenge on the chewer.
    
    And once something like that happens it leaves an indelible
    psychological impression.  Once upon a time I chewed a little bit of
    leaf tobacco (couldn't stand the dip; stuff wouldn't stay in one place)
    and then one night out drinking I ingested about equal parts of each,
    and after that I couldn't look at the stuff anymore.  Sorry to say, I'm
    in the "disgusting skunkweed" camp now...
    
    glenn
143.48PFSVAX::JACOBSend a self-abused, stomped antelopeFri Nov 12 1993 17:086
    I've never put any kinda "baccy" in mymouth.  I sucked down the smoke
    of 3 or 4 packs of cigs a day for some time, but never chewed, nor do I
    ever want to.
    
    JaKe
143.49I'm just looking for one divine hammer...DECWET::METZGERAmerica&#039;s most beloved game show hostFri Nov 12 1993 17:2715
Chewing has to be one of the most vile disgusting habits on the planet....I'd
equate it to picking your nose and eating it....

I almost puke watching those baseball players squirt wads of spit onto the
dugout floor...they must have some serious drainage in the floors of those
puppies....You couldn't pay me enough to be a groundskeep at a MLB ball park..


That's the way I see it...

gross,


 Metz
143.50(8^)PFSVAX::JACOBSend a self-abused, stomped antelopeFri Nov 12 1993 19:1210
    
>>Chewing has to be one of the most vile disgusting habits on the planet....I'd
>>equate it to picking your nose and eating it....
    
    Chewing is disgusting, but a good sinus oyster is a work of art. 
    Right, Saw????
    
    
    JaKe
143.51There are very few who never let you downAKOCOA::BREENRudy,Rudy,RudySun Nov 14 1993 10:091
143.52CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdMon Nov 15 1993 09:129
While this isn't the topic for it, I've always been amazed at people
who rag so much on folks who chew.

Save for the spitting, which, in most instances can be done very 
discreetly, there's nothing about chewing which is physically dangerous
to another person -- unlike smoking.


'Saw
143.53big brass spittoon in me garage needs emptyin'GENRAL::WADEPull!Mon Nov 15 1993 10:074
    
    	You tell 'em 'Saw!  I've never spit in anybody's lungs!  :*)
    
    Claybone
143.54PFSVAX::JACOBSend a self-abused, stomped antelopeMon Nov 15 1993 15:449
    
    >>               <<< Note 143.53 by GENRAL::WADE "Pull!" >>>
    >>          -< big brass spittoon in me garage needs emptyin' >-
    
    BUT, is it all one strand????????????????
    
    
    JaKe
143.55PFSVAX::JACOBHo, Ho, Freakin&#039; Ho!!!Mon Nov 15 1993 16:0717
    
>>           <<< Note 143.52 by CAM3::WAY "You can't polish a turd" >>>

>>While this isn't the topic for it, I've always been amazed at people
>>who rag so much on folks who chew.
    
    Saw_for_MAC??????????//   (8^)
    
    Actually, I think smoking AND chewing/spitting/dribbling are both
    putrid vile habits.
    
    Anybody comes up to me and says, "Mind if I smoke?", I just reply, "Not
    as long as you don't mind if I fart while yer smoking!"  Nobodys lit up
    by me yet.
    
    Santa
143.56Eternal Father strong to save.....CAM3::WAYYou can&#039;t polish a turdTue Dec 07 1993 10:164

Fifty-two years.  Lest we forget.......
143.57MKFSA::LONGT- 2 days and counting...Tue Dec 07 1993 10:334
	Lest we never underestimate an adversary again!


	billl
143.58a day that will live in infamyMSE1::FRANCUSMets in &#039;94Tue Dec 07 1993 11:028
    They were showing Tora,Tora,Tora on Singapore TV tonight - actually
    might have been tje Malaysian channel. One error piled
    on top of another with a few doses of misjudgment thrown in for good
    measure. AN the ending "I am afraid we have awoken
    a sleeping giant" (or close to that).
    
    The Crazy Met
143.59PTOVAX::JACOBIt happened again!!!!!!Tue Dec 07 1993 16:048
    One thing's fer sure, the Japanese will NEVER suprise bomb us again
    because they'd blow up all these beautiful buildings here in the states
    that they own.
    
    (8^)*
    
    JaKe