Conference back40::soapbox

    Aren't you glad you use Dial?  Don't you wish everybody did?

    Come up to Kool.

    
    Chock-Full-O-Nuts is that heavenly coffee...

  a little dab'll do ya

 Mother *please* I can do it *myself*

When I was a kid, the jingle went "Chock Full O Nuts is such heavenly coffee,
better coffee a millionaire's money can't buy."  Apparently the original
line was "better coffee Rockefeller's money can't buy."

    Muriel Panatelas.  Why don't you pick one up an... smoke it sometime?

    
    <------
    
    Married to a certain Mr. Kovacs???
    

    .1064
    
    Yes.

Should a gentleman offer
A Tiparillo to a lady?
And what if he does?
Well baby it's all right.
Tiparillo tonight.

	it's a little late to be naming her now, isn't it?

    
    RE: .1065
    
    Darn!!!!!
    
    I can remember who she was married to, but can't remember her name!!
    

    
    
    Arrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
    
    
    I knew that!!!!
    

 You get a lot to like with Marlboro
 filter, flavor pack or box!

> You get a lot to like with Marlboro
> filter, flavor pack or box!

with a Marlboro
     ^

Hills Brothers coffee is unbeatable
And the truth of it is...
It's reheatable.

[The coffee industry group was very unhappy about this.  Their position is
 that reheating ruins coffee.]

 You'll wonder where the yellow went
 when you brush your teeth with pepsodent

    
    Gerald....
    
    Now I understand why you got rid of your TV!!!!!
    
    :)
    

    A long wait between rest stops? Wear a SAMPRAS!

Smoke Kent with the Micronite filter.
Refines away hot flavor.
Refines away hot taste.
It makes the taste of a cigarette mild
Like a modern day in the Month of May.
Kent is the best, for the flavor you like.
Kent is the best.
(doo-wah, doo-wah, doo-way)

    Jack:
    
    I thought the commercial started...
    
    "Kents....got it all together..Kent has got it all....together!

When you've got a job to do
Reach for something good to chew
Chewing helps you stand the pace
Anytime and anyplace.

So, hi ho hey hey,
Chew your little troubles away,
Hi ho hey hey,
Chew Wrigley's Spearmint gum.

Work goes faster, smoother too
Life seems brighter when you chew
...

That doesn't sound familiar, but I do recall something like -
You'll feel better about smoking with the taste of Kent.
Kent with the Micronite filter.
Refines away [etc.]

    
    
    Good 'n Plenty... Good 'n Plenty!!
    
    "Choo Choo Charlie was an engineer.."
    

    	Choo Choo Charlie was an engineer
    	Choo Choo Charlie was his name we hear.
    	He had an engine
    	and he sure had fun.
    	He used Good'n Plenty candy
    	to make his train run.
    
    	Charlie says,
    			"love my Good'n Plenty"
    	Charlie says,
    			"really rings the bell"
    	Charlie says,
    			"love my Good'n Plenty!
    			Don't know any other candy
    			that I love so well!"

    Jason Alexander did one of those Choo Choo Charlie commercials
    in the late 70's or early 80's, during one of their revivals
    when they used live actors to sing the jingle interspersed with
    the traditional cartoon characters.
    
    Chris

    
    What's with the jingles????
    
    Anyway -  if the best part of waking up is some freakin' cup
    of coffee, i'm going back to bed!
    
    	Skip

    
    <-----
    
    You're new to "rodent warren land"... aren't you?
    

Filter blend means fine tobacco
For the best taste yet
That's why Winston is America's favorite
Filter cigarette.

    
    Sooner or later
    You'll own General
    

    
    
    The chicks are back.......

 Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the USA
 in your Chevrolet

    
    
    Can I say a few words to you about......................
    
    
    diarrhea

    Plop Plop
    
    Fizz Fizz
    
    Oh whatta relief it is :-)

    Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions
    on a sesame seed bun!
    
    

    
    .1093 You're new to "rodent warren land"... aren't you?
    
    Actually, I've just been away for a couple of years.  I forgot
    the deep dark morass these notes can sometimes get caught up in.
    
    	Skip

    
    >deep dark morass
    
    Welcome back to SOAPBOX!!!!!!!!!!!
    

    
    "I can't believe I ate the whooooole thing"
    
    "You ate it Ralph!"

    Just Do It!
    		- SAMPRAS

    
    Helps keep wetness away

    Molson Export Ale keeps on tasting great!

    Labatt's Blue, smiles along with you!

    It's Shake and Bake and I haaaaaaaalllllped.
    

    BOAC takes good care of youooooooo!

    Weeeee start out with...an english muffin then add egg and cheese and 
    something...really gooood canadien bacon yes that's how we go about
    making...breakfast is a tasty treat will satisfy your every (?)
    made fresh from batter topped with butter it tastes better yes indeed
    it's breakfast...McDonalds breakfast...made from the very best
    ingredients we do it all for you at McDonaldsssss....We do it all for
    you!!!!!!!!
    
    This came out when McD's first started serving breakfast.
    
    -Jack

Ohhh, brew me no brew with artificial bubbles,
those carbonated beers of today,
'cause Utica Club will still take the trouble
To age beer the natural way.
Utica Club - UC!

------

Byrne Dairy milk is mighty fine
Chock full of vitamines
A wealth of health in every drop
Good for the kids, for mom and pop.

    Just a pinch between your cheek and gum.

[a college friend from Baltimore taught me this one from a Balto. dairy]

If you don't own a cow
Call Cloverland now.

 .14 isn't really a jingle.  Shouldn't it be in a different topic?

> .14 isn't really a jingle.  Shouldn't it be in a different topic?

Neither's .8.

>>[a college friend from Baltimore taught me this one from a Balto. dairy]

	"taught" you?  you mean like one line at a time?  i hope you 
	took breaks.

    It's sorta upsetting that far more half of these jingles are for drugs
    (nicotine, alcohol, caffeine)....
    
    "Never had it, never will."

Because there's something
about an Aqua Velva man.

    	Hold the pickles hold the lettuce.
    	Special orders don't upset us.
    	All we ask is that you let us
    	serve it your way.
    	
    	Have it yooooour waaay.
    	Have it your way.

    
    Conjunction Junction
    What's your function?
    Hooking up words
    And phrases
    And clauses.
    

    	You get a ring,
    	and then another ring
    	and then another ring
    	and you've got three rings...

    
    Schaffer - The one beer to have when you are having more than one
     {probably because you needed a lot to kill the test]
    
    Hey Mable - Black Lable.
    
    Miller high life - the champaign of bottled beers.
     [I wonder where they got their champaign - I'd check the cork]
    
    You always remember your first 'Girl.
    
    

    	It's a world of laughter,
    	a world of tears.
    	It's a world of hope,
    	and a world of fears.
    	There's so much that we share
    	that it's time we're aware
    	it's a small, small world....

    
    ...jingle begins with twin beach babes exchanging glances
       after sizing up a pair of studly dudes...
    
        Double your pleasure, double your fun,
        With Doublemint, Doublemint, Doublemint Gum.
    
    ...what happens off-camera is anyone's guess
         
                                             

>    Schaffer - The one beer to have when you are having more than one

Cerveza Schaeffer est lo mejor quando [something] mas de uno.

    	It's not a cola, it is something much, much more.
    	It's not a root beer.  There are root beers by the score.
    	Drink Dr. Pepper.  The joy of every boy and girl.
    	It's the most original soft dring ever in the whole wide world.
    
    	(or)
    
    	I'm a pepper, you're a pepper, he's a pepper, she's a pepper.
    	Wouldn't you like to be a pepper too?

>> Because there's something
>> about an Aqua Velva man.
    
    $ set voice/mode=paul_lynde
    
    Yes, he's a transsexual.
    

    >>    Double your pleasure, double your fun,
    >>    With Doublemint, Doublemint, Doublemint Gum.
    >>
    >> ...what happens off-camera is anyone's guess
    
    $ set voice/mode=paul_lynde (again)
    
    Whatever happens, we know it happens twice.
    

                             <<< Note 489.61 by SPSEG::COVINGTON >>>

    It's sorta upsetting that far more half of these jingles are for
    drugs (nicotine, alcohol, caffeine)....

    -----

    Why, our society is highly chemical dependent.  Starts when you 
    are a kid and are given aspirin or tylenol for all that ails
    you.  It Gets you used to the idea that drugs are good.  Which
    shows up the hypocrisy of the drug laws, but that is a subject
    for another topic.

    ------

    Flintstone Vitamins - 10 million strong - and growing.

    	(first few lines forgotten...)
    
    	Palisades from coast to coast
    	where a dime buys the most.
    	Palisades amusement park
    	swings all day and after dark.
    
    	Ride the coaster,
    	get cool
    	in the waves in the pool.
    	You'll have fun so
    	come on over.

    	The Spirit of Massachusetts is the
    	spirit of America.
    	The spirit of the Red, White and Blue...

    My bologna has a first name,
    it's O-S-C-A-R
    My bologna has a second name,
    it's M-A-Y-E-R
    Oh, I love to eat it every day,
    and if you ask me why I'll say,
    'Cause Oscar Mayer has a way
    with B-O-L-O-G-N-A

    
    Callllllll for ACTION - 
    Greenwood 7-5312!  
    

    
    Call Roto-Rooter, that's the name
    And away go troubles down the drain.
    {Roto-Rooter, sewer service!
     Roto-Rooter, sewer service!}

    
    Hot dogs!
    ARRRmor hot dogs!
    

    (Say this quick, then run like hell:)
    
    Geritol... I think I'll keep her.
    
    
    re: Flintstone Vitamins
    
    One wonders when we'll see Power Rangers Aspirin, or Big Bird Condoms.
    
    Chris

    And while I was writing that one, I remembered this:
    
    Hot Dogs, Amour hot dogs.
    What kind of kids eat Amour hot dogs?
    Fat kids, skinny kids, kids who climb on rocks,
    Tough kids, sissy kids, even kids with chicken pox
    Love hot dogs, Amour hot dogs,
    The dogs kids love to bite!

Where's the beef ???!!!

Try it. You'll liiikkkeee iiiittt.

Take a puff. It's springtime!

    Very Politically Incorrect
    
    ZZ    Hot dogs!
    ZZ    ARRRmor hot dogs!
    
    Hot dogs...Armour Hot dogs...what kind of kids eat Armour Hot dogs...
    Fat kids..dumpy kids..kids who climb on rocks...
    Tough kids...sissy kids...even kids with Chicken Pox
    love Hotdogs....Armour Hot Dogs....the
    dogs...kids...love...to...biiiittte!

    You deserve a break today,
    So get up and get away
    To McDonald's

    Hot Dogs, A mour hot dogs.
    What kind of kids eat A mour hot dogs?
    Fat kids, skinny kids, kids who climb on rocks,
    Tough kids, sissy kids, even kids with chicken pox
    Love hot dogs, A mour hot dogs,
    The dogs kids love to bite!
    

    McFebruary....that's a very special month at McDonald's every day a
    surprise holiday....
    
    A jingle promoting Mc February.  This was right when they came out with
    Cherry Pies...cerca 1973.
    
    -Jack

    
    You got trouble
    Wait, don't run
    This kind of Trouble
    Is lots of fun!
    

    
    
    
    ...Open wide for Chunkie.
    
    

>> Amour hot dogs.
    
    Well, I like hot dogs too, but that's going a bit far...
    
    Chris

    My dog's better than your dog,
    My dog's better than yours
    My dog's better cause he gets Kennel Ration
    My dog's better than yours

    
    .83> One wonders when we'll see Power Rangers Aspirin, or Big Bird
    >    Condoms.
    
    How 'bout Barney condoms - I got a purple dinosuar in my pants and
    it wants to come out!!!
    
    - - - - 
    
    I'd walk a mile for a camel 
    
    - Okay, so maybe it's not a jingle.

 
Let's get Mikey. He hates everything!

    Winston...tastes good like a cigaretter should....

    
    "It's the real thing.. Coke"

    It was the real thing before we changed it...Coke.

    Lestoil, Lestoil
    The liquid detergent modern as today
    There's less toil with Lestoil
    So clean the lestoil way
    
    Use it for your laundry
    or your painted wall
    floors or woodwork
    anything at all  
    wash away dirt, grease and grime
    
    It's so easy when you use lestoil!
    

    Commercial snarf

    Meow, meow, meow, meow,
    Meow, meow, meow, meow,
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow meow, meow meow, meow meow, meow meow
    Meow meow meow
    Mee-ow!

    
>>    It's so easy when you use lestoil!

    i remember only this line.  old, oh yes.
    

>    Winston...tastes good like a cigaretter should....

So that's where the "r" in Armour went!

    Brush-a, brush-a, brush-a,
    with the new Ipana...

    [sung by Bucky Beaver]

    Mary Michael:
    
    I went through it twice.  You have one more meow than you needed.  Go
    through it again.
    
    This is pretty pathetic!

    Take Sominex tonight.....and sleep

I suspect the Lestoil line that Di and I remember was a mere vestige of
the fine jingle.

    
    This string really p***es me off.  Now I'll probably actually
    watch those fool ads just to get some more material.
    
    - - - - 
    
    From the cartoon
    
    Teenage mutant ninja turtles.
    Hero in a half-shell!
    Turtle power.

>    Take Sominex tonight.....and sleep
	Safe and restful sleep....sleep....sleep.

    re: .105
    
    I beg to differ, I think it's exactly the right # of
    meows! :-)
    
    Which line?

Who's the first to conquer space?
It's incontrovertable!
First to conquer living space --
Castro Convertibles.

    Barbos, Barbos!
    The furniture you will live with
    Happily ever after
    

Another one for lucky Jack:

Seat covers
  that look so nice
Convertible tops
  at a low low price
Safety glass
  for motor cars
Drive right in to Bon Ton.

Bernie Mannheim's Bon Ton
Tops in tops and se-eat covers.
Bon Ton, Bernie Mannheim's Bon Ton!

    Mary Michael:
    
    Before the last ME-OW that you have at the end, you need to have 50
    meows.  You presently have 51.  I sang the song in my head and put my
    finger on the meows while singing it.
    
    -Jack

 .107  Elementary, my dear Watson.

    Jack:
    
    Remember each time the cat sings "Meow Mix" it's a 
    double meow, hence the "meow meow, meow meow...." 
    line.
    
    Mary-Michael

    
    > Take Sominex tonight.....and sleep
    
    My mind is in the gutter today.... When I saw this I thought it said
    
    "Take Some sex tonight......and sleep"
    
    :-) I'm warped :-)
    Dan
    

    When you're into perfection (keep on your toes)
    You have to be quick (cuz here's how it goes)
    Push the plunger down set the timer...put the pieces in place..
    don't be slow in Perfection...you gotta move on fast...move on fast...
    else the pieces pop out before you put in the last...you got
    perfection!
    
    

    Ultra Brite gives your mouth, {blown kiss}, sex appeal.

After a series of diagnostic testing, I have discovered the error that caused
Mary Michael to have one too many meows.  See below.



           <<< BACK40::BACK40$DKA500:[NOTES$LIBRARY]SOAPBOX.NOTE;1 >>>
                          -< Soapbox.  Just Soapbox. >-
================================================================================
Note 489.101                   Advertising Jingles                    101 of 118
SMURF::MSCANLON "alliaskofmyselfisthatiholdtogether" 13 lines  18-JUL-1995 16:34
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Meow, meow, meow, meow,
    Meow, meow, meow, meow,
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
ZZZZ    Meow, meow, meow, **meow**
    Meow, meow, meow, meow
    Meow meow, meow meow, meow meow, meow meow
    Meow meow meow
    Mee-ow!

Line 9 of her meow code has one too many meows.  My suggestion is for her to
resing the song in her head and on the particular line, rest after the third 
meow.  

This is neat...kind of like DECVuit...(Or was that DECFuse?)

-Jack

P.S.  I will not relent on this Mary Michael and if necessary, I will call your
Voicemail and sing it there!

    If it says:
    
    
    Libby's Libby's Libby's on the label label label you will like it like
    it like it on your table table table!

 Rice a Roni
 the San Francisco treat




 (I once convinced someone that RaR was such a big deal in SF that they sold
it in the airport so folks could take it home for the wife (or husband) and 
 kiddies).




 Jim

Suggested improvemnt to .74, Don

       Brylcreem,
       A little dab'll do ya,
       Brylcreem,
       You'll look so debonair;
       
       But watch out,
       The gals 'll all flock to ya,
	        ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
		   will pursue
       They love to put
       Their fingers in your hair

Suggested additions to .104

>    Brush-a, brush-a, brush-a,

     New Ipana toothpaste
     With the brand new flavor
     It's dandy for your tee-ee-th.

I had sent this to Gerald before catching up in here -

From:	MOLAR::DELBALSO     "Jack DelBalso 381-2324 ZKO1-3/H18" 18-JUL-1995
 18:20:10.98
To:	NOTIME::SACKS
CC:	DELBALSO
Subj:	I figured this was too regionally esoteric for the 'box, but you might
 enjoy it

Save your money. Save your money.
Save your money. Save it Honey.
Save it for a rainy day.
Open an account, with any amount
At Onondaga Savings don't delay.
With Money in the bank you're independent.
Be a thrifty lady and a thrifty gent.
And remember, at Onondaga Savings -
The dividend's a great big four percent.

    
    ...Onondaga has his own bank?!
          
    
    Wow.

    
    	It's slinky, it's slinky, 
    	for fun it's a wonderful toy.
    
    
    	(anyone remember all the verses?)
    
    ------------------------
    
    	Yipes, stripes, fruit stripe gum...
    
    	(anyone remember the types and names of the cartoon animals that
    	were on this commercial?)
    
    ------------------------
    
    	You can trust your car to the man who wears the star.
    	The big bright Texaco star!

 1800 USA LOAN 1800 USA LOAN 1800 USA LOAN 1800 USA LOAN 1800 USA LOAN
 

    	I can remember a piece of a jingle, but I can't remember what
    	it was for.
    
    
    	Oh, THAT's the way it is.  
    	Truly-uly-uly is.
    
    	(and then it ended with something about sharing.)

>    ...Onondaga has his own bank?!

Not to mention his own town and county.

Plus a cave southwest of St. Louis which I've never quite been able to
figure out.

A young man of import indeed, that lucky Onondaga.

    re: .120
    
    Line 9 of my meow code?!! Jack, Jack, you may be a lucky man,
    but you're working *far* too many hours! :-)
    
    Now that you've pointed it out, I see it, I always stuck an
    extra meow in there (poetic license?). I guess my cats are
    hungrier... :-)
    
    But I'd still LOVE to hear you singing it on my voicemail!
    
    :-) :-) :-)
    
    Mary-Michael

    The neat round spaghetti you can eat with your spoon
    Oh-oh Spaghetti-Os!
    
    .......I think there's another verse...I don't remember
    

    J-E-L-L-O!

    Snap! Crackle! Pop!
    Rice Krispies

 Kellllllllllllllllllogs's Sugar corn pops
 Sugar pops are tops!

    
    re .125, Joe
    
    What walks down stairs
    alone or in pairs
    and makes a slinkety sound
    a sling, a sling
    a marvelous thing
    Everyone knows it's Slinky
    
    It's Slinky, It's Slinky
    for fun it's a wonderful toy
    it's fun for a girl and a boy.
    
    
    I always wondered just what they were trying to get at with
    that last line.  ooh er, missus!
    
    
    
    
    Rob
    

    You can take Salem out of the country, but...
    You can't take the country out of Salem!
    ------------------
    Mama mia, that's a spicy meatball-a!
    ------------------
    Evening wear...Very nice!
    -----------------
    Where's the beef?!
    -----------------
    Call Roto-rooter, that's the name,
    and away go troubles, down the drain!
    

    Crest has been proven to be be a decay preventive dentifrice...
                                     ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    
    couldn't they have just said it's a toothpaste that prevents cavities?

Silly Rabbit Trix are for Kids...

    
    
    IIIIIYIIIIYIIIYIIIIIII, I AM THE FRITO BANITO,
    I LOVE FRITOS CORN CHIPS........

    
    IYIYIYIIY I am the frito bandito, I love frito corn chips, and I'll
    be your friend, the friti bandito, you must not offend....

 What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs
 rolls over your neighbor's dog
 it sits on your back it's great for a snack
 its log log log.



 

    
    <---- It's better than bad, it's good!
    

>    	Yipes, stripes, fruit stripe gum...

Yipes, stripes, Beechnut's got it,
Yipes, stripes, Fruit Stripe gum.
Yipes, stripes, five different flavors,
Get Beechnut Fruit Stripe gum.

    
    
    What is it? Some type of "idiot savant" (sp) thing? Forgive me for not
    knowing the correct, new term for the above, and I'm not implying
    anyone's an idiot either...
    
     How do you people remember each and every word from those things? I
    can understand remembering a short, 4 or 5 word phrase, but a whole
    song??

    
    
    You calling us all idiot's, you dumb polack?

    
    .143:
    
    The PC term is `savant syndrome', Andy.   ;^)
    

    
>    The PC term is `savant syndrome', Andy.   ;^)
    

   And we're all victims..

    I am stuck on Band-Aids
    Cause Band-Aid's stuck on me
    

    
    re: .144
    
    >You calling us all idiot's, you dumb polack?
    
    Mike...
    
    
    from my .143
    
    
    >and I'm not implying anyone's an idiot either...
    
    
    
     You turning Polish on me??? 
    
     Careful, or I'll sew you too!!!!!!
    
    
    

    
    What's all this got to do with shoe polish?
    

 Wink the sassy one, from Canada dry


 wink

 
 wink
 
 wink
 wink
 wink
 wink
 wink
 wink
 wink
 wink

    
    RE: .149
    
    Go back to sleep Emily.... :)
    

    Gentlemen prefer Hanes :-)
    

<--- men prefer nuttin...

    Nothing beats a great pair of Leggs!
    

    
    > Mama mia, that's a spicy meatball-a!
    
    What was this an ad for ? ! ? !
    This has been bothering me since I saw the movie The Mask !
    
    Dan

    
    >> Mama mia, that's a spicy meatball-a!
    
    >    What was this an ad for ? ! ? !
    >    This has been bothering me since I saw the movie The Mask !
       
    Alkaselzer.

    
    
    Andy, I saw what you wrote, I just figured that you didn't know what
    you were writing, you being Polish and all.....

    
    
    My lawyer will be in touch...
    

    Haaaaavve...aaaaaa....nother nutter butter peanut butter sandwich
    cookie.........

    
    
    RE: .158  Hope she's good lookin.....

Some of these are slogans, not jingles.  It's gotta have music to properly
be in this topic.

>>      <<< Note 489.161 by SMURF::BINDER "Father, Son, and Holy Spigot" >>>

>>    Promise here anything...  But give her Arp�ge.

	um, i think that's "Promise here anything...  But give here Arp�ge."
	i could be mistaken though.

    This note used to say "Promise here anything...  But give her Arp�ge."
    
    But Gerald says that's not a jingle, and Lady Di is rapping on the
    typo, so this note doesn't say that anymore.

    I love Bosco, it's the drink for me.
    

The unauthorized version:

I hate Bosco, it's full of TNT
Mama put it in my milk
To try and poison me
But I fooled Mama, I put it in her tea
And now there is no Mama
to try and poison me.

>           <<< Note 489.26 by CSLALL::HENDERSON "Learning to lean" >>>
>
> You get a lot to like with Marlboro
> filter, flavor pack or box!
>
    
    Actually (or possibly another variant):
    
    	You get a lot to like with a Marlboro
    	Filter, flavor, flip-top box
    
    There was always
    
    	"We've only just begun..."
    
    (Incipid Carpenters song that began as a jingle for a California
    bank offering loans to newlyweds.)
    
    Or
    
    	I love those tiny little tea leaves
    	In Tetley's tea
    
    (not 100% sure of the first line)

>    Actually (or possibly another variant):
>    
>    	You get a lot to like with a Marlboro
>    	Filter, flavor, flip-top box

It's another variant.  I remember the "pack or box" line.    

>    	I love those tiny little tea leaves
>    	In Tetley's tea
>    
>    (not 100% sure of the first line)

First line is right.  Second line should be "In Tetley tea."

    "Arf!  Arf"
    That's my dog, Tige,
    He lives in a shoe.
    I'm Buster Brown.
    Look for me in there, too!

    
    
    Take it off, take it all off......

    > Filter, flavor, flip-top box
    
    That's the older variation.  When Marlboro was introduced, it was in
    boxes only.  That was considered a selling point because the boxes were
    "crush-proof" and because status brands like Benson & Hedges were in
    boxes.

Were Benson & Hedges even around when Marlboro first came out? I remember
Marlboros' arrival on the scene but didn't recall seeing Benson & Hedges
until years later.

Now, English Ovals were around in a box then, though not a flip-top.

    B&H were around before Marlboro.  When do you recall the advent of
    Marlboro?

I think Benson and Hedges were around years before they started advertising
heavily.

  I remember hearing the Marlboro commercial on the radio when I was about
  7 or 8 years old back when I wondered how they fit people who did the singing
  inside the radio.  Julie London (I think) sang the jingle.

Marlboro came out in the fifties along with a lot of other new filter
brands. In the early fifties, most everything was non-filtered (Pall
Mall, Camel, Old Gold, Luckies, non-filtered-Kools, etc.)

    Not to make this a thumper topic...just a point of interest.
    
    The Marlboro man is one of the lead singers for the Maranatha Singers
    at Calvary Chapel in Costa Mesa, Ca.  Just a point of interest for
    those in Christian circles.
    
    This issss....Marlboro Countryy.
    
    

>    The Marlboro man is one of the lead singers for the Maranatha Singers
>    at Calvary Chapel in Costa Mesa, Ca.

I assume that's not the dead one.

    I only rember the one that died recently from AIDS. He had the mustache
    and the horse.

>    I only rember the one that died recently from AIDS. He had the mustache
>    and the horse.

So one died actually using the product he pitched and then ANOTHER one
died of AIDS?

TTom

    Gosh...maybe my info was incorrect!
    
    

    .182
    O.K. Cancer...I barely rember that he died. They say the first to go is
    the mind. 

    
    "i'd rather light than fight..."
    
    "i'd like to teach the world to sing
    in perfect harmony (perfect harmony"
    i'd like to buy the world a coke
    and keep it company
    that's the song i sing..."
    (or something like that anyway...)
    
    
    "you can kiss a little longer
    say good-bye a little longer
    make it last a little longer
    longer with big red
    that big big red freshness 
    lasts right through it
    your fresh breathe goes on and on
    while you chew it..."
    
    "we wear short-shorts
    nair for short-shorts
    if you dare wear short-shorts
    nair for short-shorts..."
    

<- Note 489.165 
    
   Chocolate tastes like Bosco
             tastes like Bosco
             tastes like Bosco


  Very difficult to find.

kb

When you're smiling
In your Rambler
The whole world smiles with you.

    
    The unofficial version
    
    Comet - it makes your teeth turn green.
    Comet - it taste just like gas-o-line.
    Comet - try some Comet
    And vomit
    Todaaaaaaay!

Mr. Clean will clean your dirt and grime and grease in just a minute.
Mr. Clean will clean your whole [darn?] house and everything that's in it.

	>>whole [darn?] house

	nope.  "whole effing house".  i'm quite sure of this.

    Scrubbing Bubbles!

    He's the Tidy Bowl man.

    Band Aid.  Top bleeders recommend it.

I'd walk a mile for a Camel


unofficial:

... So I'd expect a Camel to walk a mile for me

    	Strong Wilamena 
    	eats her farina.
    	H.O. Farina.
    	Cream farina.
    	Tastes like dessert
    	and all boys and girls
    	love it so.
    	H.O.

re:       Lucky Strike Means Fine Tobacco

Ah, yes - L.S.M.F.T.

Also known as -
      Loose Suspenders Means Falling Trousers

And another I cannot repeat in here.

    Waal at LEAST you could put in the G-rated woids and we could buy
    vowels and suchlike???
    

Yes, I could.

But, I won't.

As if Kalikow doesn't know!

    
    Esso,
    o wareraga, 
    Esso!
    
    

    Sheesh, well *I* for one didn't misspend MY yout' smokin 'baccy 'n
    tradin' all the raunchy acronym jokes about Luckies.  I claim unclaimed
    brain-cells around any dirty incarnations of LSMFT.  Perhaps we should
    ask DelBalso, he's preternaturally lucky...
                                                         

    
    "if it's borden, it has to be good."
    
    "you can feel good...good about hood."
    
    
    

Mmmm, mmm, good.
Mmmm, mmm, good.
That's what Campbell's soup is.
Mmmm, mmm, good.

    	Brown eggs are local eggs
    	and local eggs are fresh.

    From the valley of the jolly!
    
    HO 
    	HO 
    	    HO
    
    Green Giant!

    ok, I won't. ;-)

    Reading through this topic (and this has come up somewhere else
    recently), it occurs to me that people get rich writing these
    simplistic little slogans and brief lyrics.  "Mmm mmm good"...
    fer cryin' out loud, how long did that take to write, a coffee
    break?  The agency must've gotten millions over the years.
    
    We're in the wrong business, folks.
    
    Chris

    And you're just realizing this now?

    No, no, it's been occurring to me for decades, unfortunately,
    but I can usually repress it.  It's just times like this, where
    the assembled brilliance of rich Madison Avenue climbers is
    on view all at once, that I'm reminded that I should have gone
    into something more lucrative and creative.  Oh well...
    
    I blame those blasted high school guidance counselors!  :-)
    
    Chris

Dominion.... it's mainly because of the meat !  (oooo-errr)

    
    Duff Beer for me
    Duff Beer for you
    I'll have a Duff
    You'll have one too.
    

    Have you driven a Ford lately?

My beer is Reingold, the dry beer.
Think of Reingold whenever you buy beer.
It's not bitter, not sweet.
Extra dry Reingold's neat.
Won't you try Extra dry Reingold beer?

    McDonalds is my kinda' place,
    they serve you rattlesnakes,
    french fries between your toes,
    hamburgers up your nose,
    McDonalds is my kinda' place!
    
this is a spoof of an old, old, McD's jingle that we used to sing as kids. 
    1968 or so.

    
    Have you driven over a Ford lately ?
    
    Ad for a Hummer
    
    :-)
    Dan

    > Have you driven a Ford lately?
    
    everyday... ;>
    
    
    and this one is for 'tine....
    
    "when you
    run out
    run out to white hen
    when you run out of anything
    run out to white hen"
    
    %^>
    

    > Have you driven a Ford lately ?
    
    Yup.  Thass why I haven't *bought* a Ford lately.

re .214:

Rheingold.  NNTTM.
And isn't there a line something like "It's an extra dry treat?"

    Better beer face!
    
    Actually, I like a good bitter.

re: .219
TYVM.
Cou'be. Cou'be.

ZZ    this is a spoof of an old, old, McD's jingle that we used to sing as
ZZ    kids.  1968 or so.
    
    Yeah and you screwed it up royally!
    
    McDonalds is your kind of place...
    It comes from out of space....
    They serve you rattlesnakes...
    They steal your parking place
    The last time I was there...
    They fried my underwaer McDonalds is your kind of place!
    
    
    YOU PHILISTINE!

    
    When the tablets get down to four, that's the time to buy somemore.
    
    Alkaselzer
    
    
    
    Caaaalllll for Philip Morrissssss.
    
    

N E S T L E S
Nestles spells the very best.
Chocolate!


Double your flavor, double your fun
With DoubleMint DoubleMint DoubleMint Gum.

Wait'll we get our Hanes on you!

We try harder.  (Even harder than OJ)

    re: .222
    
    No you both screwed it up!  The one I remember was:
    
    McDonald's is your kind of place
    They serve you rattlesnakes
    French fries between your toes
    Hamburgers up your nose
    The last time I was was there
    They fried my underwear
    McDonald's is your kind of place!
    
    

	I want my Maypo.

    No...that was a derivation of the one I did...to which you screwed the
    derivation up!
    
    Mcd's is your kind of place...it comes from outter space...
    French fries between your toes....dill pickles up your nose
    and don't forget those milkshakes wow!!!....They come from polutted cow
    McDonalds is your kind of place!

    
    ...polutted?
    
    

Double your pleasure, double your fun
With double-good, double-fresh, DoubleMint Gum!

    Sorry....must be that I'm getting more mature!
    
    -Jack

    
    Ohhh..
    
    A kid'll eat the middle of an Oreo first
    And leave the chocolate cookie outsides for last!
    
    

Ring around the collar!  Ring around the collar!

    At Ford, Quality is Job 1 !

    Hi neighbor
    Have a 'gansett
    Give this lager beer a chance
    it has that straight from the barrel taste
    in bottles, tap, on ice -- it's great
    yes, gansetts got the flavor, Narragansett flavor
    gansetts light but not too light
    straight from the barrel taste
    that's right , that's Gansett
    
    
    

We make our money the old-fashioned way.
We uuuuurrrrrrrrnnnn it.

re .234:

See .47.

    Mz. Debra:
    
    You screwed up.
    
    Well a kid'll eat the middle of an Orea first
    and SAVE the chocolate cookie outside for last!

    I've never seen an Orea in my life.

It's a female Oreo.

    re: Oreos
    
    In real life, it works a bit differently.  If Nabisco were to
    practice truth-in-advertising, the jingle might go:
    
    Well, a kid'll eat the middle of an Oreo first
    And leave a big messy pile of shattered chocolate cookie debris
    All over the table, chair, and floor for last!
    
    Chris

    And they're all named Cookie no doubt.

    re: Orea
    
    Orea:  A white crystalline or powdery compound, found in
           mammalian urine, other body fluids, and cookies.
    
    
    Chris

Call Rotarooter, that's the name,
And away go troubles down the drain.

Rotarooter.

    At AMC, we make weekends.
    
    (and)
    
    Weekends were made for Michelob.
    
    figger it out....

 .243  you might want to go back and read the replies from 
       the beginning.  you keep repeating things.

    The Orea Double stuff cookie was invented because a faulty PDP 11
    running RSTS caused a robot to break through a brick wall at Nabisco!
    
    -Jack

There will be no maligning of RSTS/E in this conference if you please.

      Irish Spring.
    
      Made for a man [or something like that]
    
      "But I like it too!"
    
    
      Secret.
    
      Strong enough for a man...
    
      ...but made for a woman!!

    RSTS ended up creating a multi million dollar marketing campaign for
    Nabisco.
    
    Is that better lucky Jack?!

Oh, much.

Things.  Things.  Things.

    
    Cup hands, here comes Cadbury's
    Cup hands, drinking chocolate
    Cup hands, here comes Cadbury's nowwwwwwwwwwwwwww.....
    
    

    
    weebles wobble, but they don't fall down.

    
    
    Twoallbeefpattiesspecialsaucelettucecheesepicklesonionsonasesameseedbun...

.256

I think you're repeating things.

    
    hold the pickle hold the lettuce, 
    special orders don't upset us.....

TANG!  The drink the astronauts took to the moon!

    Tang's Groce!

    Turn the handle turn it quick
    
    snap
    
    snap
    
    
    you'll never know when you'll get HIT!  
    
    It's Pie Face!!!!

    Get Twisterrrr...yes..Twisterrrrrrr...
    
    Turn the handle and touch the spot..
    Twister helps you get in a knot
    
    Get twisterrrr...get twisterrrrrr
    
    Right foot blue...left hand red......
    
    Get Twisterrrrrrrr...by MB!

>> TANG!  The drink the astronauts took to the moon!
    
    Not far enough, if you ask me.  It might still be able to
    come back!
    
    Chris

    >> Get Twisterrrr...yes..Twisterrrrrrr...
    >> Turn the handle and touch the spot..
    >> Twister helps you get in a knot
    
    You forgot the line (that should have been there):
    
       Twister helps you get a cheap feel
    
    
    That was the whole point of the game, in case anyone missed it.
    When Twister first came out, sales were in the dumper.  Then one
    night, Carson played it with one of the Gabor sisters on "The
    Tonight Show".  Ho-ho!  The next day the shelves were cleaned out.
    
    Chris

    "here's to good friends
    tonite is kind of special
    the beer we'll pour
    must be something more, somehow,
    let it be lowenbrau (sp/accents)"
    
    

re .264:

Chris, Tang does serve a useful purpose.  It's great for cleaning the brown
crud from your dishwasher (according to some notes in HOME_WORK).

    Raq:  
    
    You forgot...
    
    But toniiiiiiight......
    then comes,
    Let it be Lowenbrau!
    
    Go 1977 Bruins!

Tang makes me repeat.
I prefer Zarex.  Or Bosco.
 
Lik-A-Maid is good too.
But not as good as raw jello.

    
    Lowenbrau was great !
    
    'til some effing US company bought it !
    
    Dan
    

Mabel!  Black Label!

Schlitz!  The beer that made Milwaukee famous!

    Old Milwaukee...tastes as great as its name.
    
    So, it tastes like the waste from an industrial town?

Yup, rhymes with Schlitz.

    
    I liken the taste of Old milwaukee, to beaver piss. About the same
    flavor and color too.

    
    
    When's the last time you drank beaver piss?

    Schaeffer...is the....one beer to have when your...havin more than
    one!

Art thou a connoisseur of l'eau du beavre?

Schaeffer was THE absolute WORST.

And it used to be the absolute cheapest, which is of course the principal
reason for buying it.

TTom

    Weideman's, 3.99 a case.  Goebel (pronounced zho-BELL), a premium
    quaff, about 4.65 a case.  

Weideman's always recommended giving the high sign which they claimed was
a "W" but I always thought they were talking about the gesture that shows
people that you think they're no. 1.

Another old beer, 14-K Hudepoll and I know I'm not even close to the
correct spelling.

Richer, keener, Augustiner

TTom

      Hamm's...as clear as sky blue waters!

 Olympia...It's the water

JAX of New Orleans, brewed with fresh Mississippi River water...

    
    
    	What about Schlitz or Red White and Blue?
    

    
    Stroh's the only fire brewed beer.

    Dow Black Horse Ale.

    My beer is fire brewed. Stroh is a liar.

    
    <---  sure Leslie

    Stroh's backwards is Shorts, sort of.

JAX of New Orleans, brewed with fresh Mississippi River water...
				^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Re: 289

See .274

I can see it now:

The new DECbelcher900TP, the port-switching belcher.

TTom

    You haven't lived (more likely died from hangover) if you haven't
    had Stegmeier's beer!!
    
    

My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R
My bologna has a last name, it's M-E-Y-E-R
I like to eat it everyday
And if you ask me WHY?, I'll say
That Oscar Meyer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A

    muncha,muncha,muncha,muncha
    muncha,muncha,muncha,bunch-a
    fritos goes with lunch
    (repeat)
    
    

    Lather
    
      Rinse
    
        Repeat
    

    Not appropriate to repeat in the shower!

    
    A sprinkle a DAYYYY
    helps keep odor AWAYYYYY!
    
    

Re: .302

>My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R
>My bologna has a last name, it's M-E-Y-E-R
                                    ^
                                    A?

    
    So, it's Jewish bologna.
    
    

  .310  See .30.

	maybe it would be easier if we just duplicated the
	first 200 replies.  save everyone some time.

    
    Time to write-lock this topic, eh?   :^)
    

You'll wonder where that note went
When you write the word Pepsodent.

    > My bologna has a last name
                       ^^^^
                      second
    
    NNTTM.

    
    
    RE: The Oscar Mayer Bologna commercial....
    
    
    
    We had our own words for that one.....went something like this:
    
    
    My hobby has a first name
    It's S M O K E
    My hobby has a second name
    It's J O I N T
    Ohhhhhhh, I love to smoke it every day
    And if you ask me why I'll sayyyy
    'Cuz marajuana has a way of keeping people high all day.
    
    
    (Disclaimer-I NEVER smoked pot!!  Tried it once when I was 23 yrs. old,
    hated it, and never tried it again.)
    
    
    Terrie
    

    So which was it, you never smoked it or you tried it once.  Can't have
    it both ways Terrie, no, no you can't.  

    
    >I tried it once when I was XX yrs. old, hated it, 
    >and never tried it again.
    
    Why does EVERYone say this?    ;^)
    

She didn't inhale.

    
    
    
    Actually, that's true.  I was on my way home from The Pago Pago
    in Milford, MA.   A group of us had gone there after work for
    a drink.  THe girl I rode there with lit up a joint on the way back
    to get my car.  I took one hit, and gagged on it.  Never even got it
    into my lungs I don't think.  I choked and coughed for about 15 minutes
    straight after that.  It was GROSS!!!
    
    
    Terrie
    

I tried it, loved it.
Tried it again, loved it.
Tried it some more, liked it.
Tried it, got bored with it.
Stopped trying it.

    It's not for everyone...
    
    Then again, not everyone likes, alcohol, nicotine, or caffeine...

    
    Hey 'tine.......
    
    The last few.....
    
    :-))))))))))
    Dan