[Search for users] [Overall Top Noters] [List of all Conferences] [Download this site]

Conference back40::soapbox

Title:Soapbox. Just Soapbox.
Notice:No more new notes
Moderator:WAHOO::LEVESQUEONS
Created:Thu Nov 17 1994
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:862
Total number of notes:339684

245.0. "Odd First Dates" by PERFOM::LICEA_KANE (when it's comin' from the left) Thu Jan 12 1995 09:25

    
    In an article on tanning salons....
    
    	"It's really a mood enhancer," said Kellie Fallon, 25 of
    	Burlington, who was introduced to tanning on a first date
    	five years ago.  "There are no phones or husbands or kids
    	or bosses."
    
    
    Well, enough about tanning.  Are you two still seeing one another?
    
    								-mr. bill
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
245.1NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Thu Jan 12 1995 10:321
One would hope there are no husbands on a first date.
245.2MPGS::MARKEYHoist the Jolly Roger!Thu Jan 12 1995 15:2513
    I don't know whatever possessed me to do this (well, I do know: my
    wife)... but I once went to a (shock horror) Amway meeting. At
    this particular meeting, Ken and Barbie were the featured "You
    too can be dripping with money and brag about it every chance
    you get" speakers. Well, during this gag fest, the now happily
    married Ken and Barbie with 4 kids, 2 houses, 9 dogs, 3 cars
    and a country club membership, let it be known that their first
    date was at a similar meeting.
    
    Boy am I glad I never went back. Lord only knows who I'd end up
    marrying next! :-) :-)
    
    -b
245.3MOLAR::DELBALSOI (spade) my (dogface)Thu Jan 12 1995 15:342
The tic-tac lady?

245.4MPGS::MARKEYHoist the Jolly Roger!Thu Jan 12 1995 15:355
    >The tic-tac lady?
    
    This isn't the dream topic! :-)
    
    -b
245.5funny replies to his notes tho.NCMAIL::GEIBELLFISH NAKEDThu Jan 12 1995 15:3712
    
    
     -b.
    
        That last note reminds me of someone who left during the last
    soapbox session, his name escapes me but your discription fits him to 
    a T......... oh I remamber now I think Glen silva used to call him
    half life or something like that. I have seen some real arrogant people
    in my day but this guy took the cake.
    
                                                      Lee
    
245.6trey hafelyPENUTS::DDESMAISONStoo few argsThu Jan 12 1995 15:382
	       .5 yuppa
245.7NETCAD::WOODFORDI think I'll stop Counting Now.....Thu Jan 12 1995 15:3818
    
    
    Once, when I was in highschool, a boy came to pick me up for a 
    date. My dad was sitting in the living room, and said date was
    ushered into the livingroom to wait for me. (Picture of my father 
    needed here-very large born and bread Sicilian with black hair,
    and immaculate dresser...Mafiosa looking.)
    
    Dad was reading a book.  Date says 'gee Mr. DeFiore, you're really
    into that book.  It must be good.'  Dad looks up from book, and
    says 'It's the Bible,Son.'  Then he goes back to reading in silence.
    
    I never saw that boy again.....
    
    Thanks Dad. :*)
    
    Terrie
    
245.8MOLAR::DELBALSOI (spade) my (dogface)Thu Jan 12 1995 15:413
Sicilian bread is pretty good for those prosciutto and mozzarella
sandwiches.

245.9NETCAD::WOODFORDI think I'll stop Counting Now.....Thu Jan 12 1995 15:425
    
    re: .7
    
    that should have read 'bred, not bread.  
    
245.10PENUTS::DDESMAISONStoo few argsThu Jan 12 1995 15:422
 especially wild boar prosciutto!  oh my heavens, that stuff is so good.

245.11NETCAD::WOODFORDI think I'll stop Counting Now.....Thu Jan 12 1995 15:434
    
    
    re: .8  oops...you got me first... :*)
    
245.12MOLAR::DELBALSOI (spade) my (dogface)Thu Jan 12 1995 15:462
S'alright, Terrie. It's still good bread.

245.13GMT1::TEEKEMACount down 5..4..3..2...Thu Jan 12 1995 16:0618
	In college I used to manage a couple of houses that
were rented out to college students in exchange for free
rent.
	Once a (female) tenant could not make the rent and
offered to go on a date in exchange for my paying the rent.











	She is now my wife ............. %^) %^)
245.14BIGQ::SILVASquirrels R MeThu Jan 12 1995 16:428
| <<< Note 245.2 by MPGS::MARKEY "Hoist the Jolly Roger!" >>>



| Boy am I glad I never went back. Lord only knows who I'd end up
| marrying next! :-) :-)

	But it does explain why she married you....
245.15BIGQ::SILVASquirrels R MeThu Jan 12 1995 16:4415
| <<< Note 245.5 by NCMAIL::GEIBELL "FISH NAKED" >>>


| That last note reminds me of someone who left during the last soapbox session, 
| his name escapes me but your discription fits him to a T......... oh I 
| remamber now I think Glen silva used to call him half life or something like 
| that. 

	Lee, I used to call him �fly. :-)  I think his real last name was
Hafely, or something like that....

| I have seen some real arrogant people in my day but this guy took the cake.

	And he ate it too!

245.16MPGS::MARKEYHoist the Jolly Roger!Thu Jan 12 1995 16:446
    >But it does explain why she married you....
    
    Nope, 'fraid not. She's very bright. _Very_ attractive and a wonderful
    person. There's just no explaining her lapse... :-) :-) :-)
    
    -b
245.17BIGQ::SILVASquirrels R MeThu Jan 12 1995 16:4512
| <<< Note 245.13 by GMT1::TEEKEMA "Count down   5..4..3..2..." >>>


| Once a (female) tenant could not make the rent and offered to go on a date 
| in exchange for my paying the rent. She is now my wife ............. %^) %^)


	I knew she didn't marry you because she liked ya.... :-)  How much rent
did she owe that MADE her HAVE TO marry you?


Glen
245.18GMT1::TEEKEMACount down 5..4..3..2..1..Out o&#039; here.Fri Jan 13 1995 09:474
	Nothing Glen, she just liked the idea of a stable
level headed person providing for her for the rest of her
life.
245.19SUBPAC::JJENSENJojo the Fishing WidowFri Jan 13 1995 10:552
So what happened to the stable, level-headed guy that
forced her to marry you instead?	;^)
245.20RDGE44::ALEUC8Fri Jan 13 1995 10:579
    .18
    
    "providing for her for the rest of her life"
    
    us men get a raw deal don't we ? girlies witter on about their choices
    to career, motherhood, blah blah but wot choice do we get cept to slave
    away till we die ?
    
    ric
245.21POWDML::LAUERLittle Chamber of Oral ExploitsFri Jan 13 1995 11:003
    
    <-- Don't be such a dweeb.
        
245.22GMT1::TEEKEMACount down 5..4..3..2..1..Out o&#039; here.Fri Jan 13 1995 11:1018
>>So what happened to the stable, level-headed guy that
>>forced her to marry you instead?	;^)

	Bwahahah, I payed him off....... Money buy's anything %^)

>>"providing for her for the rest of her life"
    
>>    us men get a raw deal don't we ? girlies witter on about their choices
>>    to career, motherhood, blah blah but wot choice do we get cept to slave
>>    away till we die ?
    
 	I my case it is a mutually satisfying arrangement. She has the
option of going to work anytimne she wants, she is a RN. When we decided
to have kids we agreed one of us would stay home full time with the
kids. I at one time offered to be "Mr Mom" when she had a job 
oportunity that was equal in pay to mine. She chose not to.
	There are some women who have unrealistic expectations and others
who are happy being secure and cared for and loved...etc.....
245.23CONSLT::MCBRIDEaspiring peasantFri Jan 13 1995 11:314
    >        Bwahahah, I payed him off....... Money buy's anything %^)
    
    
    Yes it does, including my date for tonight....
245.24GMT1::TEEKEMACount down 5..4..3..2..1..Out o&#039; here.Fri Jan 13 1995 11:332
	Is it by the hour or for the entire evening......?? :-)
245.25BIGQ::SILVASquirrels R MeFri Jan 13 1995 14:457
| <<< Note 245.18 by GMT1::TEEKEMA "Count down   5..4..3..2..1..Out o' here." >>>


| Nothing Glen, she just liked the idea of a stable level headed person 
| providing for her for the rest of her life.       ^^^^^^^^^^^^

	So she married you, Frankenstien.... or is that Teekenstien???
245.26VMSNET::M_MACIOLEKFour54 Camaro/Only way to flyMon Jan 16 1995 15:2323
    My Z/28 was broken as usual (busted pushrod).  But my friend had his
    girl and a whole bunch of her friends in his car, so me and my other buddy
    jimbo hop into my Z and go out to show off.  I was out about 5 minutes
    when I saw a group of girls leaving the mall and they screamed at us
    (one of those primal deals, you know, the "good" scream).  So, I took
    off after them.  While in hot pursuit, I had to wait for
    some carload of bimbos to turn out of a parking lot, because I was
    taking a left turn.  The driver drove over the curb with her mommas
    car (I would come to understand why this happened later).  Anyway, I 
    roar by the tiny-boppers (3 chicks all in the front seat of a big
    impala) and pull in behind the lookers which cat-called us.  Now we're
    stuck at a red light.  I'm stuck in the middle of a tuna sandwich, er,
    so to speak, but behind us ms. driving instructor & co are blowing the 
    horn and waiving at us, so I say "This is different, WE'RE being chased.  
    Screw the babes in front of us, let's see what these gals have to say."  I
    pulled into the parking lot of another mall and they followed us in.
    We chatted for about 30 seconds and zoomed over to my house around the
    corner.
    
    "Hi Mom & Dad, say hello to some girls we just met.  They're nice."
    (The driver will become your daughter-in-law in 4 years.)  :^)
    
    MadMike
245.27MOLAR::DELBALSOI (spade) my (dogface)Mon Jan 16 1995 20:575
>    when I saw a group of girls leaving the mall and they screamed at us

And to think that prior to my marriage they
hadn't such things as malls . . . 

245.28CSC32::J_OPPELTWhatever happened to ADDATA?Tue Jan 17 1995 11:577
    	I remember malls back when I was about 6 or so.  It was Christmas
    	time.  We went into a Sears store, and we all had our coats in
    	the shopping cart.  When we were about to go out of the store,
    	we didn't put our coats back on, and I was worried about being
    	cold.  But to my amazement when we stepped outside, we were still	
    	inside!  And there were trees in there, and a whole bunch of other
    	stores!
245.29(it was pretty funny tho...)GAVEL::JANDROWbrain crampWed Jan 18 1995 15:2415
    
    well, just heed this bit of advice:
    
    don't order a hotdog on your first date.
    
    i did that once.  no idea why i did it.  i don't even really like
    hotdogs.  but my first date with said guy was a lunch date at
    papagino's in acton.  didn't even think anything of it at first until i
    caught him watching (briefly) as i bit into it.  i couldn't finish my
    lunch.  i said something to him a few dates later and he said he could
    help but watch me...
    
    i don't think i have had a hot dog since...
    
    
245.30TROOA::COLLINSRogering The ShrubberWed Jan 18 1995 15:475
    
    Once took a woman to a movie on a first date...and then became 
    extremely uncomfortable with the constant use of the word `orgasm' 
    by the characters.  :^)
    
245.3145777::ALEUC8Thu Jan 19 1995 06:347
    .29
    
    similarly bananas
    
    8-)
    
    ric
245.32WMOIS::GIROUARD_CThu Jan 19 1995 06:478
    Had a first date with a girl back in '75. I took her to the Pioneer
    Valley (Orange, Ma). Went to leave and pulled the entire speaker
    post out of the ground. First time, only time I ever did that.
    
    Must've made quite an impression. We ended up living together
    for 5 years! That shoulda been a sign!
    
    Chip
245.33LJSRV2::KALIKOWUNISYS: ``Beware .GIFt horses!&#039;&#039;Thu Jan 19 1995 07:089
    Prolly fergot you were in a drive-in...  Musta had the speaker turned
    down so as to have fewer distractions, and had the windows all fogged
    up.  So who could blame you for uprooting a speaker you didn't know was
    attached to yer window?
    
    No court would convict you!!
    
    |-{:-)
    
245.34WMOIS::GIROUARD_CThu Jan 19 1995 07:143
    well, uh... yes. were you there?   :-)
    
    Chip
245.35It seemed like the logical thing to do at the timeDECWIN::RALTOGala 10th Year ECAD SW AnniversaryThu Jan 19 1995 12:216
    Driving along on one first date twenty years ago, I made a somewhat
    off-color joke when passing a sign reading "Entering Beverly"
    (Beverly, Mass.), that was characteristically silly and adolescent,
    but she ended up marrying me anyway.
    
    Chris
245.36POWDML::LAUERLittle Chamber of Belgian BurgersThu Jan 19 1995 12:254
    
    I hear the same thing every time I tell someone I live about a mile
    past the "Entering Shirley" sign on Route 2A 8^).
                                         
245.37ASABET::YANNEKISMon Jan 23 1995 10:538
    
>    I hear the same thing every time I tell someone I live about a mile
>    past the "Entering Shirley" sign on Route 2A 8^).
    
 hmmm ... on route 81 in PA you drive by "Intercourse" PA ... never had the
    right passenger to check out intercourse.
    
    
245.3845777::ALEUC8Mon Jan 23 1995 11:036
    there is a roadsign in the UK "Hump"
    
    any excuse
    
    ric
    :-)
245.39DELNI::CRITZScott Critz, LKG2/1, Pole V3Mon Jan 23 1995 12:178
    	My daughter's college roommate was from Intercourse, PA.
    	Before I knew this, I asked, "Where are you from in PA?"
    	She said (asked) "Do you know Intercourse?"
    
    	I almost died right there. I musta turned 10 shades of red
    	trying not to say something smart.
    
    	Scott