Conference 7.286::digital

    You forgot perhaps the biggest revenue producer of all!  Pay toilets. 
    They could be set up with timers so that people pay according to the
    amount of time they sit on the can.  (This could be financially
    disastrous to some people) At $.25 per minute DEC could get rich off
    some people while making others more productive.
    
    And how about entrance fees?  50 cents to get in the building.
    
    I'd bet that the above would bring in at least $.5 billion a year.
    
    In Jest
    
    Ray

    ....then of course there is always building and grounds maintenance.
    We could start people out by vacuuming their own cubicles.
    
    ....as a last resort we could close all the cafeterias and have
    everyone brown-bag it.  Estimated savings:  one million alkabelchers
    annually.
    
    On a serious note, paying for your parking at a company-owned lot is
    not all that unusual.  My daughter-in-law (making <20K) pays 80 bucks
    a month in D.C.

    Well, thanks for the laugh. Don't forget to turn out the lights as you
    leave.
    
    
    /andy/

    We could all rent our terminals and desks from Digital for say, 
    $50 per month.
    
    Then, maybe we could be charged a notes fee, $.05 per DIGITAL note.
    

I've decided to do my part.  From now on, I'll bring my own toilet paper to
work.

Martin.

>I've decided to do my part.  From now on, I'll bring my own toilet paper to
>work.

	I don't need to do that.  I get enough stupid paper
	memos in my mail slot.  I'll just hang 'em on a 
	nail in the stalls instead of throwing them away.

    reminds me of a facet of our New England/Mill heritage - 
    company stores!  "you _must_ buy _everything_ at the company store"
    
    and we've been talking about grazing livestock on our acres of lawn - saves 
    on landscaping fees & produces a sale-able product!

    How about a coin slot on the side of all computer systems. We only
    work here for enjoyment anyway. If the revenue isnt sufficient
    from a machine it gets reallocated to another desk! Therefore user
    pays for the resources they most need. 
    
    Or a keyboard and mouse monitor that counts the clicks and sends a bill 
    at the end of the month. 
    Could be the follow-on product to LMF for really showing
    customers we trust them (we'd probably try and sell it as an "ASSET")
    Digital could alter its hiring policies to only employ Video game
    Junkies.
    
    What about "RDB/Tron Action Relational Database" or "Who killed the VAX?
    performance Monitor and mystery game". Let's reach a new, more fun, 
    regular paying audience, even if its only internally.
    
    
    John

>    manage to hide the $30/month in expenses, i.e. customer lunches that
>    never happened, etc.

Hmmm.  How many employees do this.  100?

$30/month*100*12

$36,000.  Find 30 more like that and you'll save a million.

Don't laugh...  I knew a guy in Shrewsbury who had a coin box attached to his
VT240.  Even had our logo on it, and yes, the keyboard locked up until you
put a quarter in.  I believe this thing was sold to libraries and what not
where they could charge for public access terminals...

cost a quarter!!

/mike

Hey - the Digital Library Network could actually start charging overdue
penalties on books kept out too long! And, patterning things after
the People's Republic of Mass., they could banish (i.e. layoff)
anyone too far in arrears!

-Jack

        Re: .13

> Hey - the Digital Library Network could actually start charging overdue
> penalties on books kept out too long! And, patterning things after
> the People's Republic of Mass., they could banish (i.e. layoff)
> anyone too far in arrears!

        It would cost money to lay them off.  Just automatically deduct
        the fines from their paycheck.  When the weekly fines equal
        their take-home pay they have reached their limit--don't let
        them take any more books from the library until they get a raise.

        					B.J.

    ----and DEC employees will no longer get vacation pay--no work, no pay.
    Same for company-paid holidays--all canceled effective immediately.
    
    Norm

Someone in our group suggested that we could auction off all the
"works of art" hanging on walls throughout the company. They could start
here at BXB1. The paintings in the entry way of MRO1-3 might also bring
a few dollars.

Another jokester suggested that we could double up people in offices and
increase the density per building. That way we could close some buildings
down and save money that way.

Also, receptionists should charge for questions and directions. Can't find
the "Mirrored-Sunset-on-Pearl-Lake" conference room? No problem, for $0.50
the receptionist will be glad to tell you. We could extend this to
secretaries answering the phone:

	"I'd like to leave a message"

	"Certainly, what cost center should I charge this to?"

   Why don't we take bets on which of these off the wall ideas actually end up
   getting implemented. 50% of the take for DEC and 10% for me...
   
   q
   
   

    Hey .9, that's defrauding the company, and grounds for summary firing.
    Funny, I don't remember any covered parking at the Phoenix Plant,
    and Phoenix is significantly cooler than Tucson.
    
    Thirty bucks a month sounds like a personal comfort issue to me. 

    Well folks, all this is fine but... let's not get away from the main
    topic and that is... to take things seriously and try to avoid wasteful
    lifestyles at work... I think that in these trying times we should do
    all we can to help the company... it is true that we are getting to the
    easy items... the hard ones and the ones that the company "would"
    significantly save millions... is a tough one that, upper management
    have not attacked yet, and that is...the elimination of dead wood that
    the company is stuck with...
    It is easier to cut costs on the easy things but they'll have to get to
    more serious things when they "run out" of the easy stuff...
    I think it is not EASY to implement all changes in a company this big,
    so, I have great respect for whatever measures upper management takes
    to turn it to proffitability, if that means to tight the belt, I am all
    for it. Digital deserves a long and healthy existence!
    Ana
    

re:                     <<< Note 1186.19 by DUGGAN::MAHONEY >>>

I think we all agree with you, Ana. But this string is for fun!

-Jack

    money saving ideas:
    
    o close down the health clubs.  Being healthy IS important.  BUT,
      instead of aerobics, why not shovel snow, push a lawn mover, push a
      broom, carry waste.
    
    o hold a walk-a-thong for DEC
    
    o hold a bake sale for DEC
    
    o each employee bring in a lump of coal to heat his/her cubical.
    
    o or, why not use excess people to accually *make* (manufacture) the
      products that we sell?  I bet that if we really try, we could design
      and make some proudcts that we sell.
    
    ed
    

    >  o hold a walk-a-thong for DEC
    
    	Sorry, I don't look good in those really skimpy beach outfits.
    

    Since the situation DEC in is management's fault (whether they want
    to accept the responsibility or not) how about if they apply the
    following cost-cutting algorithm:
    
    Until we return to profitability,
    
    	all first-level managers take a 5% pay cut
    	all second-level managers take a 10% cut
    	all third-level managers take a 15% cut
    	... repeat as necessary ...
    
    
    Actually, I did read somewhere that at some Japanese companies, the
    senior managers are the first to take reductions if the company is not
    doing well.  And I don't mean Lee Icocca's phoney $1.00 salary one year
    -- the year before he got $22,000,000 in salary, bonuses, and stock.

   re .-1
   Why is there this pervading concept that if the Japanese do it, it must be
   right.
   
   What we really need to do, is not cut back, retreat, ramp down or whatever,
   but go forward. Yeah, I know times are tough, but we are big kids now, and
   we have a bigger team than most others. If we haul *(@#(, and start
   agressively targeting the competition (and I dont' mean IBM), and grabbing
   market share while everyone else is hurting.
   
   Why not IBM? They are bigger than us, they can play the same tactic. We
   should be actively targetting transitioning customers from Bull, DG, Wang
   etc. By absorbing market share from them, we stand to grow easier and
   faster than if we took on IBM.
   
   q
   

    RE:-1
    >>> "Why is there this pervading concept that if the Japanese do it, it
    must be right."
    
    
      Well, they must be doing something right. They are't having the
    problems we are.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
    And lets turn the pay cuts around a little.
    
    First level managers take a 15% cut
    Second level 10%.
    First level 5%.
    Or maybe just a straight cut of 25% from all of them til things are on
    track. Think of the cost savings!

    	Yeah, lighten up! I'm really happy to see all the constructive
    ideas we can come up with when we put on our corporate hats and put our
    minds to it. Who needs the DELTA program!
    	Still I really like the idea of pay toilets and raising livestock
    on all this well-landscaped real estate that DEC owns. I had another
    comment to make about software engineers and livestock, but I'll
    control myself.
    	One scarey thing is that somebody pointed out to me that some of
    these "ridiculous" ideas are apparently being implemented. One is the
    elimination of product trinkets. Also, when the word came down that
    there would be no more bottled water, people in the Mill cancelled
    their contract with Belmont Springs...who happened to also own all the
    refrigerators and microwaves. Guess what? All the bottled water,
    refrigerators, and microwaves have been removed (by Belmont Springs)
    from certain parts of the Mill (maybe all for all I know).
    	So when you open your holiday turkey box this year and see a hot
    dog, don't be too surprised. Remember you heard it here first!

Charge a fee for the use of meeting rooms, plus an additional fee per 
participant. Not only would this produce revenue, it would speed up "process" 
activities of all kinds. 

Charge extra for overhead projectors; overhead slides; and each "open issue"
generated.
    

	We could also sell all the chairs in meeting rooms. We can make
	some money and any meeting that is too long to take standing up 
	is probably too long anyway.

				Alfred

    
    
    How about turning off your terminal/pc/workstation at the end of the
    day? I notice equipment powered up when people are not in. Sometimes
    for weeks when they are off site or on vacations. Collectivly this
    may save a few Mil. Maybe we can install Watthour meters on our
    tubes and charge the user for excess power consumption. This could
    be connected to the Decnet and report readings to payroll for auto-
    matic deduction.

   re .29
   
   Shoot that one down in flames.... Ask your local Hardware Maintainability
   people.  Switching electronic equipment on and off on a regular basis
   contributes to early failure, which is often more expensive (in terms of
   repair) than the additional power costs. ANd just think of all of the
   compute cycles wasted by mailers that keep trying to send to nodes that
   have been powered off for the weekend.
   
   q
   

...provide pay-showers for the DEC facilities that cater to joggers, 
bicyclists, etc...

    Our water machines and refrigerators are leaving after lunch tomorrow. 
    I still haven't figured out where the nearest water fountain actually
    is - there isn't one where John (Covert) said, unless he means there is
    one way over by the cafeteria, although of course there are sinks in
    the bathrooms.  We will miss the refrigerator, though!  This is going to
    make it hard on us brown-baggers.  I think the microwave ovens here in
    HLO belong to Tobins, so I hope they will still be here; most of my
    group packs their own lunches, and most of those who do are doing so to
    save money, like I am.  Though, come to think of it, it is so cold in
    our office area that a lunch is probably quite safe left sitting out
    for hours anyhow; this place is a perpetual icebox!  Our group is
    trying to figure out how to get another refrigerator in here; we may
    have to pay to rent one ourselves.  What a great way to save DEC money:
    steal it out of my pocket!  I might feel more charitable if it hadn't
    been more than two years since my last raise (maybe January....don't
    hold your breath!  Geesh!).
    
    /Charlotte

Sell the DEC Country Club!

    REgarding the idea of powering terminal on/off nightly.  
    
    Sounds like urban leagon here.  I've NEVER seen any data that suggests
    that this is a problem, nor what the problem really is [ya, I heard
    power surgess, ...]  what is the failure [if there really is one]
    
    I know for the 20 years I've turned my terminal off before going
    home and its never failed [granted some of those years it was an
    ASR33].  And my TV goes on/off several times daily.  It is over ten
    years old and hasn't failed once.
    ed
    

    Re: .34 by CGHUB::CONNELLY:
    
    > Sell the DEC Country Club!
    
    That's not by any chance an oblique reference to the ZKO facility is
    it.  :-)

re: .36

>    > Sell the DEC Country Club!
>    
>    That's not by any chance an oblique reference to the ZKO facility is
>    it.  :-)

Oh, and all this time i thought that little group of buildings near Hanscom
Field was our country club!
								paul

    
    Package the frigid air.  Call it "CHILL-OUT!" and sell it to the
    government, who will ship it to the troops in the desert.  Use 
    the profits to pay for the excessive air-conditioning.  If there's
    any money left over, hire a psychic who can find the location of
    the light switches.  Turn off the hundred-odd overhead florescent
    lights that play night and day, seven days a week, to a largely
    empty house.
    
    Virginia
    

    I cannot understand how anyone can make light (read Poke fun) at such a
    serious thing in today's economy. If this note is a "LITE" one then
    label it so or move it to the HUMOR notesfile. DIGITAL needs some
    serious ideas NOT wisecracks.

    
     re. 39 
    
       When the decision-makers impose measures that are penny-wise    
    and pound-foolish, humor is probably the only resort for us grunts.
    So...I think DEC should 
    
      1. sell fishing licenses for its various ponds
    
      2. institute membership dues for committees
      
      3. create "Be a VP for a week program" so noters with all the
         answers could pay to be a VP. 
    
      4. Stop double-dipping - you know where both a husband and wife work 
         for DEC - let's introduce the concept of the 'virtual employee' 
         which encompasses all employee relatives/dependents in a 25 mile 
         radius! One paycheck/virtual employee.
     
      5. Sell popcorn at any meeting with overheads.
                                             
      6. How about a lottery, fill out 32 bit patterns at $1.00 a shot.
        Top prize winner is allowed to actually buy a 2 year old DEC
        workstation at transfer cost, software free!
    
      7. create a Booster Club, since school spirit is low, sell 
        pom-poms and d-i-g-i-t-a-l pendants. 
    
       Now this bottled water nonsense, I plan to find my Boy Scout
    canteen & belt this weekend, wear it to work. But it leaks, well
    wear dark pants.
                                               
      tomba ans
    

    We're probably getting silly, .39, because most of the real
    "management" solutions offered so far are silly.  Our real problem,
    articulated in a meeting a few months ago by a DEC VP, is "we either
    need $20 Billion in revenue, or 80,000 employees".  Guess which one
    is going to happen.

    I heard that the number was 54,000, not 80,000.
    
    Anyhow, back to practising Japanese....
    
(DEC 55 1/2, change -3 3/4; DJIA 2565.35, change -17.32 at 12:48.
Report entered at Fri Sep 14 09:55:02 1990.)

    God, all I remember is AH SO and ICHI BAN and HOW MUCH FOR......

...
    +---+---+---+---+---+---+
    | d | i | g | t | a | l |    INTEROFFICE MEMORANDUM
    +---+---+---+---+---+---+
    
    TO:  All Employees				Date: 12-Jul-79
    						From:
    						Dept: Accounting
    						Ext:
    						Loc/Mail Stop:
    
    Subject:  Traveling Expenses
    
    With the implementation of Functional Accounting, we have experienced
    many problems regarding personal expense vouchers.  As many of you are
    aware, Originator training classes are being held.  However, as with
    any training, items of an unusual nature are not covered in these
    classes, and clarifications have been made since you attended class. 
    This will hopefully answer questions you may have.  Also, since the
    1979 general budget was grossly underestimated, the General Accounting
    Office requests that you will make an effort to curtail spending. 
    Guidelines for this are also included.
    
    1.  Hotel Bills - In the future, all traveling personnel should refrain
    	from reserving 'singles'.  Doubles and/or triples should be utilized
    	whenever possible.  A practice revision is being prepared which outlines
    	procedures for soliciting roommates from lobbies, bars, etc. in order
    	to qualify for lower rates.  Ask at the hotel desk if a discount is
    	given if soap, toilet paper and postcards are not used, or if the bed
    	is not slept in.  Local telephone calls, laundry service and gratuities
    	should be charged to a room other than your own.
    
    2.	Personal Car Mileage - To be used only when absolutely necessary. 
    	First try all other means of obtaining transportation, i.e.,
    	hitchhiking, coercion, hijacking, etc.  If you must use your own car,
    	be sure to find all employees traveling to the same location...
    	Corporate findings have discovered that the average vehicle will hold
    	4 males and 7 females.
    
    3.	Meals - Meal allowance has been reduced to one meal per day per
    	employee at a cost of $1.97.  Studies have shown that one loaf of
    	bread, one jar of peanut butter and a six-pack will do nicely and still
    	leave change over for a tip, and will last 5 days.
    
    4.	Personal car parking - Way too much is being spent on this
    	frivolous activity.  The motor vehicle group suggests parking in the
    	middle of the street, putting the hood up and flashers on.  This is
    	usually good for one hour and 37 minutes, at which time the employee
    	should move the car to another street.
    
    5.	Entertainment - The only allowable entertainment from this time on
    	will be day-old newspapers, with a cost limit of 3�.  If current papers
    	or magazines are purchased, the employee must absorb the cost, less 3�. 
    	In lieu of theatres, find a drive-in and sit just outside the fence. 
    	In lieu of coin-operated television in hotel rooms, enter another room,
    	plead amnesia and ask to watch the news because you want to see if
    	you're a missing person.
    
    NOTE:  Because people traveling usually have extra personal time, the
    	   company is issuing every employee a tin cup and a handful of 
    	   pencils to peddle from a street corner.  Proceeds should be 
    	   turned in weekly to cover the cost of the accounting operation.

    
    
    REF:  <<< Note 1186.40 by STARVU::YOST >>>
        
    >><< 7. create a Booster Club, since school spirit is low, sell 
    pom-poms and d-i-g-i-t-a-l pendants.>>
    
    Mike Hammer reports that at the Atlanta ALF area hdqs and CSC facility,
    which hosts a regional educational services center, there is just off
    the lobby the Digital gift store!  It has Digital logo'd mugs and
    umbrellas and t-shirts and pens, and on and on!
    
    The future has arrived!  Low tech, high margin.
    
    Coming soon to YOUR neighborhood?
    

    .35:
    
    Terminals may be less sensitive to repeated power cycling than PCs and
    workstations.
    
    Dick (who still remembers the scenes when KLs lost power...)

>It has Digital logo'd mugs and umbrellas and t-shirts and pens, and on and on!

The one I'm drinking my coffee from right now is maroon.  I got it at the
Bedford school store (of course).  4 for my parents, 2 for us.
				/AHM

re: 1186.2 

>-< Give me a break! >-

OK, here goes ..

SNAP!

re .49

What are the lower cost alternatives.

Be sure you consider the _exact_ location of the traveller.  I used to
save money by renting a car for trips to and from the airport.  I'd have
to spend the extra time and effort to pick up and return the car in Maynard,
but from Acton this was (and I believe still is) the lowest cost option
short of leaving your car at Logan for up to six or seven days, something
the company should not require anyone who doesn't have a theft-proof junk-
mobile to do.

My secretary couldn't understand why I was spending the money for a rental
car when the limo services to and from Nashua were cheaper.  I told her to
try to find a cheaper option from Acton.  She couldn't.

/john

    Sounds like someone either flew on a holiday (I flew home from my last
    business trip on the 4th of July, and the only limo running cost $50)
    or called the wrong limo company.  It would not make sense to require
    an employee to leave the family car at Logan or even at the Logan
    Express depot in Framingham.  This crazy company tried to tell me to
    get some neighbor or friend to drive into Boston to pick me up on the
    4th of July instead of paying that much for a limo!  I thought that was
    absurd.  What I finally did was to have my husband leave a car at Logan
    Express, since they were running that day.  That wouldn't work these
    days, now that we are down to only one car (which sucks!).
    
    Normally I use either Littleton Limo or Worcester Airport Limo.  Both
    are cheaper than renting a car, and lot less of a nuisance than
    sticking the family car in an inaccessible place like the airport for
    several days.  Worcester Airport Limo runs hourly and stops running
    late at night, so I don't use them for pickup in Boston anymore after a
    late flight stuck me with having to rent a car to drive home in the
    middle of the night.  Littleton Limo meets your plane - they charge
    extra if it comes in after some hour (1AM?) but at least they will pick
    you up.
    
    /Charlotte
     

RE: .26 ... Refrigerator removals

That happened to us too.  One day it was there, the next it was gone.  So what
did we do?  We went out and bought our own!  Our coffee fund had almost enough
to purchase a small fridge, with the difference coming from a small contribution
from each group member.

Now we gotta figure out this water cooler situation...

...Roger...

re: 1186.50

The dollar cost of doing something also has to include the people/time cost.
Alas, profit/loss figures do not take this into account, that's why there are 
lots of illogical accounting/finance rules at all companies.

I've parked at Logan for up to 2 weeks. I realize that I can get to/from the 
airport for less bucks, however, there are at least the following costs to 
consider:

	1. Flexibility of getting to the airport is limited by limo schedules

           I often work at home or in my office until it is time to leave for
           the airport. I can't afford to lose the (productive) time being
           tied to a limo schedule.

	2. Upon return, the limo schedule could cause one to wait for some time
           at Logan. In most cases, I have no idea what my return flight will 
           be.

	3. Business travel is exhausting enough as is. The last thing I am 
           willing to do is wait for a limo upon return.

           With normal traffic, I am home about 75-90 minutes after the plane 
           gets to the gate. Worst case has been 2.5-3 hours.

	4. Limos from Nashua are getting a lot more expensive. I think it is now
           over $20 each way.

    RE .52 and other abot refrigerater removals.
    
    What is happening to these refrigeraters that are removed?
    
    Are they being sold or were they rented? 
    
    OR...Are simpy using expensive warehouse space to store them until 
    its ok to have a refrigerater in the office.
    

    Today at MKO the Library is having an open house with demos of their PC
    based CDROM information retrieval system, free copies of books that
    have been withdrawn from the collection, screenings of their videos
    and, get this, REFRESHMENTS.  
    
    Not just donuts, either, but imported cheeses, crackers, baked goodies,
    coffee, punch, etc.  Somebody said "Wait 'til Jack Smith hears about
    this".  And well he should, because I found out that all the refreshments
    were provided for out of the pockets of the Library staff.  
    
    This is outrageous.  One person spent about $40 of their own money on
    cheese and crackers.  Others baked cakes, pastries, even home-made
    calzones.  I think it's a wonderfull showing of initiative, but I felt
    guilty when I realized this was coming out of their own pockets.  Gee,
    if we had Belmont Springs here, we could've used the money we saved on
    water to reimburse them for the punch.  
    
    What's even worse, I was introduced to a very useful tool for gathering
    information usable in my current project, only to find out that they
    are unable to get the two additional PCs they need because of the IEG
    freeze.  Several people had asked why they didn't have the Bookreader
    available with all the CDROM documentation that's available.  Again,
    they can't get the hardware.
    

RE: .55

Our refrigerator was leased from Belmont Springs.  It was about a 3.5 cu. ft.
fridge with the hole for the water bottle on top and hot/cold taps on the front.
Belmont came in and dragged it away last Tuesday, 9/11.

Now all we have is our new fridge, and we're checking on reacquiring the water
cooler, probably at our own expense, and maybe with another vendor, like Poland
Springs.

...Roger...

RE:          <<< Note 1186.57 by ROGER::GAUDET "Nothing unreal exists" >>>
                   -< They took their fridge and went home >-

>Now all we have is our new fridge, and we're checking on reacquiring the water
>cooler, probably at our own expense, and maybe with another vendor, like Poland
>Springs.

Our group here in NR5 decided to have our own "water fund." and have 
Belmont or Poland make on site deliveries.  However, we got shot down. 
We were informed by someone in purchasing that only vendors with DEC 
contracts could make on site deliveries (for liability reasons?).  
Ours wasn't a DEC contract so the water vendors could not deliver to our 
site!  (What's next, no pizza deliveries!)

    Have them ship the water to you UPS.  The loading dock will accept
    anything.  Just kidding.
    
    Little known fact about bottled water:  the one-gallon and 2.5 gallon
    bottles you can buy at a grocery store are cheaper per gallon than the
    big bottles they deliver.  And if you will take a non-name-brand water,
    you can save over 40%.  (But you don't know where some of that stuff
    has been.)

    RE: Buying our own water.
    RE: Employee paid water coolers!

    I am in one of several groups with a number of people interested in the
    convenience, time saving, and productivity enhancement potential of
    getting an water cooler to be paid for by the employees.

    Most of us understand the $'s the company will save by not buying water
    is a small gesture, however it is a step in the direction of economy.

    (flame on)
    BUT, PROHIBITING employees for paying for the water is a real slap in
    the face.
    (flame off)

    A number of calls to purchasing ended with a call to Mick Prokopis of
    Jack Smith's staff. Several calls to his line, answered by his
    secretary, resulted in being referred to Murvin Lackey of purchasing.

    Murvin's phone was answered by someone other than his secretary, who
    informed me that Murvin's secretary is a temp and would not be able to
    help me and she would have Murvin return my call. (25 min ago)

    (flames showing)
    Should we be paying for the electricity to run employee purchased
    refrigerators & micro waves?  If we can have employee purchased micro
    waves & fridges, can we bring a cooler from home and carry in the
    bottles? What if one of us falls during an exercise class on company
    property, or slips in the shower after a noon run, or, or!!  
    OOPS, would some one get me some water, I think I burned my self.
    JACRH  				(c = crooked)
    

    
    RE:58 and getting water delivered.
    
    i have just finished close to two weeks of B.S. but finally have water
    delivery and an account. Though I don't have time for a lot of this I
    was reffered to this note by another employee to share the information.
    
    (Please 'scuse the spelling, I'm not backing out to checker because I
    want this to be quick and short as possible.)
    
    Company policy has been and is - if the water tests bad, bottled water
    is provided.
    Jack Smith's Aug 29 memo was clear - if the water tests good, no more
    company paid water deliveries. He further identified employees buying
    their own water as a good thing.
    Corp. purchasing has a problem. They want company policy on the issue
    of any non-required bottled water in a DEC facility. They have
    expressed an interest in eliminating ALL bottled water deliveries. They
    have indicated to water companies that NO bottled water is to be
    delivered to Digital facilities. They are saying DON'T start 'Water
    Clubs' on your own. They evern indicated the REAL alternative was for
    everyone to carry their own jugs! 
    
    Now...none of these Purchasing 'calls' are company policy. I know. I
    tried to get 'policy' changed and it dosen't exist!
    
    The real way to get bottled water at your site (pauid for by you, of
    course) is to contact the site facilities manager. The manager along
    with the Site Host Management committee can decide to allow individual
    water funds paying for their own deliveries. This is fact!
    
    A real concern of purchasing (as opposed to other concerns) is that
    bills will not be paid and DEC will get stiffed. My solution to this
    was simple- everyone pays a deposit up front to cover three deliveries.
    A collection is made after the second delivery. If there isn't enough
    cash to pay for the third delivery - the account is cancelled, and the
    remaining funds (after the last payment) are disbursed. ALL DELIVERIES
    SHOULD BE STRICTLY CASH ON DELIVERY. Then - no potential DEC liability
    for payments. (Purchasing didn't seem impressed, but who knows why?)
    
    Poland Springs provides our account with the corporate rates for cooler
    and water and the price is WELL BELOW what we would have to pay in
    stores. 
    
    The thought of an employee having a 2 1/2 gal. jug of water slip from
    their hand while climbing the stairs in the morning, and the resulting
    impact on the folks behind them, should cause purchasing more concern
    than any pusedo concerns over the liability of a Poland Springs driver,
    insured, trained, equipped and more than willing to deliver!
    
    Purchasing dosen't have it easy. Jack Smith dosen't have it easy. But
    when purchasing gets between a reasonable solution to a necessary and
    justifed company change, it just makes my job, and the jobs of those
    around me more difficult.  Credibilty for Corp. purchasing is
    non-existent as far as I'm concerned. To make defacto 'company policy,'
    to fail to put it in writing and to ignore and confuse inquires on the
    matter, is not helping.
    
    Let's face it - bottled water and subscriptions are not the stuff of
    increased net. There's real work to be done. But, somewhere, somehow,
    the Digital way (that brought me aboard 10 years ago) is slipping away.
    I found people telling me "Don't make waves." Others said "Get
    permission in writing."  WHAT? Uh-unh. The open door works - and when
    it quits - use the front door. Get forgiveness - not permission says
    Amazing Grace, quite rightly. And lastly, Post the results in NOTES so
    the blundering bureaucrats can't prevail. 
    
    
    Anyone say's you can't do it - make them put it in writing.
    
    J.B.

    As noted in -.2 I also have been following up and have come to much the
    same conclusion as -.1. Purchasing said it was POLICY and pointed to
    Mick Prokopis of Jack Smith office. Mick returned my call and was most
    helpful. NOT POLICY! But a purchasing call. Still  waiting for
    Purchasing.
    

    Would someone kindly tell me why all this fuss is being made about
    bottled water? JS said you can have bottled water if the tap water
    tastes bad. So that implies that all the places that don't now have
    bottled water have good tap water.
    
    Also at school I did a project that involved looking at water quality
    in Mass. One of the interesting things we found out was that public
    water is tested often and tested for all sorts of different
    contaminants. There is far less testing of bottled water, basically any
    old shit goes. Apparently the Perrier Benzene thing was only discovered
    by accident by some random test somewhere.
    
    I've also heard that some bottled water is gotten from local taps
    anyway.
    
    So what's the big deal about bottled water that makes people willing to
    move heaven and earth to get it? Can't the energy be redirected to
    something more useful?
    
    Dave

    Seen recently on a local water cooler:
    
    	" Notice 
    
    Digital Equipment Corporation will no longer pay
    for bottled water. Henceforth, this water cooler
    will be filled with dry, Beefeater martinis.
    
    Employees MUST supply their own olives."
    
    /se
    

    From a European perspective (we don't have water coolers in the UK
    anyways), I cannot understand why this announcement was made by a
    senior Vice-President. If it takes an SVP to announce this, then
    I'd say there's some serious focus problems at a very high level
    within the company. Sure, the IEG announcement made sound sense
    and came from the right source, but Water Coolers?
    
    Surely any top personnel manager could have announced this with
    some attendant update to company policy, after all would George
    Bush announce on National News that the government is to reduce
    funding on Raccoon studies in Montana - I think not!
    
    Perhaps Water Coolers are an institution in the US and perhaps are
    regarded as sacrosanct by some, what SVP's should realise is that
    these announcements are greeted with amazement in Europe and perhaps
    elsewhere and do not instill any sense of well-being for the future.
    
    Don H.
    

    
    
    Might as well add my two cents......
    
    
    Certain buildings around here had bottled water brought in and existing
    bubblers removed because, after some testing in the DEC buildings, a 
    high lead content was found in the water......Supposedly due to the 
    plumbing. Now people are hearing that to save money the bubblers are
    now safe to use.
    
    
    
    
    That seems to be what I hear from most of the people that report to me.
    
    Lou

    Quote from a poster in a Lescofier museum ( a very famous French chef,
    creator of "peche Melba" etc).

    	" Don't drink water ".

    
    If every employee were to give up one week's pay and give it back to
    DEC, How many dollars would go into the bank and would it help?
    
    Rick

Was the rule:

	Can have bottled water if the local water TASTES bad

		or

	Can have bottled water if the local water TESTS bad

I have had water out west that had such a high mineral content
that it TASTED awful but was deemed to be healthy otherwise.

Maybe we shold bottle Hudson's (and other sites) wonder water and sell it.
Look at Perrier (sp?).

				Bill

    RE: -1
    The rule was, and still is, if it TESTS bad, etc.
    
    RE: .62
    
    If you want to install a bottled water fund at your site -
         contact the facilities manager and/or the site management
          committee.
    
    If you want to engage in a discussion of bottled water -
         contact purchasing.
    
    J.B.

I'm sure that the water out of the water fountains at Hudson and PK3
would test as tasting bad.

Part of the problem is the reservoirs in the coolers themselves!

/john

    In the spirit of charging for things that used to free, Digital is
    implementing a new fee schedule to collect revenue on the
    following activities:

    The fee for the use of the Digital logo in a memo is $1 per
    recipient. The fee is to be paid by author of the memo as an
    automatic payroll deduction.  

    Only licensed employees will be allow to make decisions. The
    decision license annual fee is $10,000. Any employee making a
    decision will be paid $10 per decision.
    
    A policy and procedure fee of $1 per word added to an existing
    policy, $2 per word for new policy. 

    A complaint fee of $1 per notesfile note. The fee for a 
    complaint about a complaint is $2.

    Membership on any committee requires payment of a fee of $50. The
    Corporate Committee membership fee is $500. A Corporate Policy
    Committee membership fee is $1000.

    mike

    Try the following formulas, see how much will be saved.
    
    For those making more than 200k a year, cutback to 200k.
    For those making between 200k and 100k a year, cutback to 100k.
    For those making between 100k to 75k a year, take a 20% cut or cutback
    to 75k.
    For those making between 75k to 50k a year, take a 10% cut or cutback
    to 50k.
    For those making between 50k to 40k a year, take a 5% cut or cutback to
    40k.
    
    Nay, it may work in Japan, but will never work in America.
    

    Re the scale in -1:
    
    Drat, I miss my chance to make a contribution!
    
    I'm reminded of the Wizard of Id cartoon, a year or so back:
    
    The King:  	    And so, I've decided to do away with the penny.
    
    First Peasant:  First the penny... Next the nickel... Where will it
    		    end?
    
    Next Peasant:   At the nickel, for me.
    
    
    :)
    aq
    

    
    
    Well, the stock price is still plummeting, there's rumors of layoffs in
    January, the water coolers are gone, and what does my wife come
    strolling in the door with yesterday after work:
    
                     yet another Digital Coffee Mug
    
    We got a cabinet full of them now.
    
    I swear the company could save a few million a year just by getting
    rid of the coffee mugs and other assorted trinkets.

	MORE COST SAVING IDEAS HEARD ON THE LUNCH TABLE TODAY

	    		IN A FRIVOLOUS MOOD 
    
* No more office cleaning staff. Every employee is expected to empty their trash
can at the end of the day in bin. Each employee will be responsible for cleaning
their office garbage. Hallway cleaning will be shared by all employees. Your 
PSA will post the weekly cleaning schedule..

* Machines will be installed in the microwaves, refrigerators etc to 
collect the usage fee of 25 cents for each use, to cover electricity expenses.

* To mimimize the hotel expenses, each employee is required to accomodate the 
fellow out of town employees for , at least a minimum of 2 working 
days per month, including bed, food. 

* Cost center manager will organize pot luck lunches on a regular basis in 
lieu of entertaining the customers for lunch. Each employee shall provide at 
least one main dish or 2 side dishes per week.

* The following guidelines will apply for customers lunches or dinners whenever
the pot luck lunches are not feasible.

	Suggested restaurants :

	Mcdonalds
	Burger King
	Wendys
	Friendly
	Jack in the Box
	International Pan cake house
	Dairy Queen

Employees should take advantage of the promotional offers such as 99 cents 
big mac etc where ever available. All the free toys, game pieces should be 
handed over to PSA for further use or auctioning.	

* To minimise electricity costs, every other tube light in the offices will be
switched off, effective immediately.  All lights will be switched off for those
having offices near windows.







    

    How about a corporate version of Megabucks?  The company sponsors
    a weekly lottery, pockets half the cash, and pays the rest out to
    the winners.  Since the company is much smaller (Population) than
    the state, the odds can be made more favorable.  Maybe it would
    have to be called KiloBucks instead of Megabucks.

re: trinkets --

A few weeks ago, I heard an interview (on NPR's Fresh Air) with the
head of Bell Labs.  He said that he used "trinkets" as simple "thank
you" rewards: books, candy bars, dinners.  Nothing special
or expensive, but as tangible indications that the person being
rewarded was doing a good job.

In 1974 or thereabouts, when I was a software specialist in Sweden, I
came to Maynard to do some special work for a customer.  With my boss'es
permission, I took the entire RSTS/E engineering group (about 6 people)
out to the Wooden Shoe for lunch.  Total cost ran around $30.  After that,
I was no longer a nagging voice on the telex, but a real person, and I
had no problem getting anything I wanted for my customers, and then some.

About that time, we started installing significant numbers of RSTS/E systems
in commercial sites.  My part of the installation usually took two days:
one day to build and configure the software and help the f/s guy do the
final check-out and one day to make sure the customer understood how
it all worked.  I usually invited the customer grunt folk (software folk
and operators) to lunch.   We had happy customers who cut us some slack
when bugs cropped up.  "Trinkets" can be cheap investments in the long run.

So, be proud of your collection of Dec coffee mugs.

Martin.

re: .79

You probably already know this, but there are 2 ways to get a DEC trinket
in the field:

	1) Buy one from EAC (Employee Activities Committee).

	2) Be a customer.

Bob

    Trinkets are great
    targets! Bring 'em to the rifle range and make 'em dance.
    
    Seriously, when I see mugs and hats and t-shirts I'm reminded
    of that extra 9 months a few years ago when there were no 
    raises being given, my standard of living went down a bit,
    and likewise my attitude. If somebody wants to praise my
    effort they can say it in greenbacks. I'll drink my coffee 
    out of a paper cup, thank you.

Re .76:

>* No more office cleaning staff. Every employee is expected to empty their trash
>can at the end of the day in bin. ...

OK by me.  It still sickens me to think that when I joined the company in '81 it
was each individual's responsibility to pitch recycle paper into a dumpster down
the hall, but in 1990, we bought a few thousand wastebaskets so that everyone at
ZK had *2*, apparently because people couldn't be trusted to walk down to the
machine room to recycle their laser printer output every once in a while.

>	Suggested restaurants :
>
>	Mcdonalds
>	Burger King
>	Wendys
>	Friendly
>	Jack in the Box
>	International Pan cake house
>	Dairy Queen

None of those chains have their own notes file.  You should have started the
list with White Castle (q.v.).
				/AHM

        Re: .82

>OK by me.  It still sickens me to think that when I joined the company in '81 it
>was each individual's responsibility to pitch recycle paper into a dumpster down
>the hall, but in 1990, we bought a few thousand wastebaskets so that everyone at
>ZK had *2*, apparently because people couldn't be trusted to walk down to the
>machine room to recycle their laser printer output every once in a while.

        In case you haven't noticed, most people *can't* be expected to
        go out of their way to recycle.  The recycle rate is much higher
        with two wastebaskets, but there are still people who can't be
        bothered to separate paper that can be recycled from other trash.

        					B.J.

    How about cutting down the weeked to just Sunday and WORKING
    Saturday for free. 
    
    David Buswell
    buz
    

    Well, I was hired in the beginning of 1976, right after a hiring
    freeze.  At that time, people who were here before the freeze had
    various stories to tell.  One of them was that they were asked to work
    45 hour weeks, as a "contribution" to the company.  Most engineers
    laughed and asked why they were being asked to cut BACk to only 45
    hours??
    
    I usually work 45-50 hours a week, more if really necessary (as happens
    sometimes).  But there's no way I am working this Saturday - it's Yom
    Kippur.
    
    /Charlotte

    REF:  <<< Note 1186.84 by JUPITR::BUSWELL "We're all temporary" >>>

    >><<How about cutting down the weeked to just Sunday and WORKING
    Saturday for free.>>
    
    I would observe that many employees in the field for the last three
    years have been working more than 40 hours, doing more work.
    
    But despite all this quantitative effort for the last three years,
    Digital still has declined steadily in revenue, margin and net
    operating income.
    
    The Puritan work ethic of working longer hours does not appear to have
    much real impact in today's complex organizations and aggressive world.
    
    Perhaps a change to a "qualitative" effort would be in order as a
    different way of addressing the problem; working smarter, methodically
    changing in a million subtle ways the "how" of all Digital actions
    thereby leading to more success in increasing both efficiency and
    effectiveness in making money with assets from the marketplace.
    

    re: .86
    
    Yes, David, but the question is, "WHY do the sales people have to put
    in so much O.T. and get no real return in increased sales?"
    
    It's because they spend most of their time "hunting for resources". I
    know, I'm on the other end of the phone trying to help them.
    
    Examples from this week alone:
    
    "I've spent the last 2 days on the phone trying to find a DS 5000 to do
    a benchmark for a $650K sale. It should only take about 30 minutes to
    run the test."  (Customer is in L.A. but we'll do the benchmark in
    Andover MA. Does this make sense?)
    
    "I'm desparate for about 6 RZ55's or 56's for a [corporate account]
    technology day ... I was able to beg 6 workstations, but they're all
    diskless!"
    
    "I have a big technology day scheduled at a local college, and we have
    been calling around, writing memos, and doing everything we can to get
    someone there for the day to demo [product]."
    
    "We've been trying for 3 weeks to get someone to do a CASE
    presentation for this Friday."
    
    "I've been trying to sell [product] for about a year to 2 customers,
    now they want to buy it and I hear it's on engineering hold and will
    probably be canceled ... I need someone to help me talk the customer
    out of this product and help me figure out what we can sell them
    instead."
    
    Even our best sales people don't get much of a chance to SELL. They
    spend too much time looking for the support they need to back them up
    and trying to read between the lines on our product strategies.
    
    Selling is nose-to-nose time with people who work for the account you
    are supposed to be working. It isn't time spent on the phone with DEC
    employees begging for help.
    
    (All examples are REAL from this week, and only edited slightly to
    provide a little anonymity ... and these are only the calls I got.)
    
    /se
    
    
    

    As I've written before, every major undertaking in the field starts
    with negotiation for the most elementary resources because teams which
    are ready to work have not been formed and equipped.
    
    There's a misconception thruout Digital that every attempted sale will
    pull in special people, special equipment, etc. and this needs to be
    coordinated.  Coordination takes time.
    
    This was and is utter nonsense.  Our lack of preparedness to do the
    ordinary is a fundamental problem.

    Here's some of the ways money is being saved at our facility:
    
    	- The security guard now sits on a bicycle contraption all day.
    	  This is hooked to a generator and provides power for the
          facility.
    
    	- Hot air from conference rooms is used to heat the water in the
    	  bathrooms.
    
    	- Employees come in at weekends to cut the grass outside.
    
    	- The facility's crew has stopped repainting the walls every
    	  couple of months.
    
    	- Everybody has volunteered to take a 10% pay cut.
    
    Dave

This'll save a _fortune_


	Put all US employees on Euro equivalant wages.


	Craig.

    But it will probably cost us an RA92 for all the hate notes you are 
    about to recieve !

re: .90

Well, if we also got the European vacation schedule...

Bob

    ...and the 13 months pay they get in Germany....lead me to it!!!

When one relocates from the states in most cases, isn't there a stipend added to 
their base pay to bring them into alignment with the same level in Europe ??

>(Customer is in L.A. but we'll do the benchmark in Andover MA. Does this make
>sense?)

Maybe.  There are only 47 on the Enet as of a couple of weeks ago.  I see one
in Sacramento, one in Oakland, and one in Santa Barbara.

Of course, I wouldn't know what one looked like if it fell on my foot.
				/AHM

    I just saw a printed circular in my desk from MRO4 building services..
    Since the contracts for Green Plants whave been eliminated, the
    building service has asked for volunteers to take care of the plants
    and they have given a new name for that " GREEN THUMB CLUB".. 
    
    It looks they will soon ask all the employees to come with the lawn
    mowers for mowing the lawns....
    
    

    re -1
    
    >It looks they will soon ask all the employees to come with the lawn 
    mowers for mowing the lawns....                                     
    
    Don't you mean shoveling the snow? :^)
    
    Mark

    re -1 
    
    ...it depends on the location (So. Cal or Phoenix vs Minnesota
    or New England)....
    
    pat :-)

    I think that's a great idea!  I'd love to take care of plants in the 
    office. We had a zillion plants in KDT....and got a memo not
    to water them.   
    
    I'd like to see this kind of "group effort" catch on instead of
    everyone b*tching about  being put out.   
    
    

        
        I was asked to post this suggestion by an individual that wishes
        to remain anonymous.

        
        "Why weren't we given the option, through the democratic process,
         of choosing bottled water by eliminating our company picnic or
         holiday turkey or other company sponsered activity?"
        
        Here in Phoenix, the tap water is heavily chlorinated and tastes
        like it.  It also contains at various times, other elements and
        is quite hard - it is the main source of kidney stone formation
        here.
        
        A large percentage of the population in Phoenix buys bottled
        water or filters the water used for drinking and cooking.  I,
        myself, filter my tap water.
        
        The other point is that water, here, does have a high usage - it
        is a desert and even with air conditioning, the body needs a lot
        of fluid replenshment.  For us, the decision to eliminate bottled
        water is seen as a punishment, not a cost savings.

        And earlier, speaking of the Country Club reminded me of the time
        I worked in Tewksbury, where in the winter the nurse send around
        a memo stating that we shouldn't drink coffee made with tap
        water, eat in the cafeteria (because the food was cooked with tap
        water) or drink from the fountions because the sodium levels were
        way above acceptable recommendations for human consumption.
        (This was due to the salt usage on the roads.)
        
        Bob

    Isn't is possible for employees to purchase their own water if they so
    desire?  We just eliminated CORPORATE purchase of bottled water,
    correct?  So, get your group together, contact the local bottled water
    company, and get a fund together from the employees for the purchase of
    bottled water!
    
    Dave

    
    	Re: .102
    
    	We tried that and were told that we couldn't.
    
    	Although your group may rent the cooler and pay for the water,
    	the delivery person must walk on and through Digital property
    	and that makes the company liable for any accident that may
    	occur.  Apparently, it is either not possible or extremely
    	complicated for individuals to assume insurance and other
    	related responsibilities.
    
    	We ended up sharing the responsibility of buying 2 1/2 gallon
    	spring water containers available in grocery stores.  They're
    	purchased by group members in rotation and kept in a small
    	refrigerator we obtained.
    
    

    re: 103
    
    If anyone accepts hauling water as real alternative to deliveries  -
    they almost deserve the hassle.
    
    Someone is always talking about what 'they' said or ment.
    
    Guess what? The liability in terms of Digital and bottled water has
    nothing to do with injury to third parties. The real liability concern
    of purchasing (from whence the situation was blown up in regards to
    Jack Smith's memo) is that local water funds will not continue to PAY
    for their own water and Digital will get stuck with the bill.
    
    Earlier on in this note I offered advice and consent on how to get an
    employee paid water fund going. I repeat that offer. This isn't theory
    or skull duggry(sp), it's just that I carried the issue of buying our
    own water up and back down the line already. We have a water fund. It
    is in Digital's and our best interest to have the fund and to have it
    set up the way we did it. Yes, there are other ways, but this is one
    that works.
    
    In terms of liability, I almost hesitate to add, the physical liability 
    for Digital is better seen if you consider the following:
    
    
    Employee carries a jug of water up crowded stairs in morning. Halfway
    up, sweating jug comes loose from employee's hand and crashes down
    steps knocking another employee and setting off chain reaction of
    injuries. 
    
    One of these could (would?) negate the total savings of the cancelled
    contracts.
    
    (I do favor the water directive. I am really ticked with the way it was
    mis-quoted and mis-applied by purchasing.)
    
    John Baird

    re: 103
    
    > We tried that and were told we couldn't
    
    Could be your problem is that you asked permission. (?)
    
    I think it has worked elsewhere ... water is delivered C.O.D.
    
    /se

	My friends americans,

	what the h*** is going on over there?!

	You know, replies .103-.105 looks like a a piece of bad
	science fiction. A society, that was once known as the land
	of freedome, has become so complicated that you can't even
	handle such a simple thing as bottled water. What's next?

	When I go to the US I usually bring some wine , calvados or
	similar products of my country of residence. Maybe I'll bring
	some bottled water next time. Benzene-free :-)

	Regards from the other side of the pond,
	Ake

    
    Re .103:
    
    Sounds like the work of a petty bureaucrat. This kind of silliness is
    one of the may small symptoms that add up to company paralysis.
    
    We had privately funded bottled water for a coffee mess in MRO long
    before it was installed site-wide, and to my knowledge no one ever said
    squat about it.
    
    Now I'll misquote Grace Hopper: It's easier to apologize afterward than
    to ask permission. DO IT.
    

Re: .106

yes, I think we are [in trouble].

    you are right over there. re .106.
    
    but do remember this is MA. We have more lawers, doctors, 
    and indian chiefs than anywhere in the world. People here
    are condition to accept what ever is handed to them,( as 
    long as it isn't a lower tax bill, or a higher pay check 
    they are all set). 
    
    Remember to Mass. isn't even a state. It's a "common wealth"
    sounds un-american!!
    
    
    David Buswell