Conference trucks::football;1

RE;-1
	Are you alright ?

    I don't think he is... imagine supporting Swansea.... 
    
    Rick.

    Unfortunately, it's where I was born, and where I live (occaisionally),
    so if I supported anyone else, my mates would beat me up.
    
    We shall gain promotion!
    
    Oh yes!

    
    Hi Swansea fans,
    
    	The Swans beat Premier team Norwich at the Vetch on Tuesday night
    in the Coca Cola Cup. They won 1:0 but go out 1:3 on aggregate.
    
    JBG

Can somebody please tell this clown that I'm not talking to him.

    JBG
    
    CHEFS::GEORGEM isn't talkling to you....
    
    yours ever so helpfully,    Ray
    
    up the R's

    
    I think it was great to see little Swansea beat giants Norwich the
    other night, after all there are from a small country with a population
    of only a couple of 100 people and a few thousand sheep.
    
    Hopefully this will be the boost that Welsh football needs and maybe
    one day they will win the world cup like England did in 1966.

    
    Paul,
    
    	you can mock all you like, but the Swansea team which stuffed that
    English Premier side the other night included 4 sheep in the defence
    plus two dogs playing on the wings who kept running in circles 'cos the
    ref was alway using the whistle.
    
    8-)
    
    JBG 

    Yeah, and in return you inflicted Max bloody Boyceon us!
    
    Think that leaves us about equal ;-)
    

  Shirley Bassey
    
  The Alarm
    
  Neil Kinnock
    
  Sheep worrying 

    
    Matt,
    
    So, does penllagaer have a football team?
    
    Ian.

Weren't there any placements in Wales, you could have done us all a favour......
o'h to add to the list......Tom Jones too....(need i say more)

    
    3M? huh... Theyre the kind of people who employ the likes of Trevor Gorman.
    
    no comment!
    
    ;-)
    
    Ian.

>I'm not going to continue this line of conversation, because England has 
>undoubtedly produced the biggest list of morons and annoying freaks that the 
>world has ever seen (after america, that is).
    
    Actually, Matt, the theory you presented in note 142 works the opposite
    way here: there are 3 million of you and over 50 million (?) of us, so
    as a ratio, your list of "morons and annoying freaks" just about
    catapults Wales into the Guinness Book of Records ;-)
    
    Keep faith with that red and white strip, though. If Wales really want
    to lift the World Cup one day, it's a step in the right direction ;-)
    
    Dom
    
    P.S. Cliff Morgan...Richard Burton...Tony Lewis...Ivor the Engine...
    

    Matt,
    
    Perhaps you can help me out as we're on the subject of Welsh footie
    (I'll forget about all the other jingoistic crap). I saw on Football
    Focus a while ago that the centre forward for Portmadoc (Ian someone??)
    was on target to get the Golden Boot as Europe's leading scorer. Did he
    actually do it?
    
    Cheers,
    
    Paul. 

    
    How about swapping Colin Jackson for Elton John ?
    
    Paul
    
    PS - Do you want a box of matches and the address of my holiday home in
    Wales

    Re the Golden Boot award:
    
    Didn't it go to some Romanian whose record was suspect to say the
    least, or was that a couple of years ago?
    
    Stuart
    Minister for misleading information

    Apologies for further consolidating this rathole, but I recall reading
    that the Turkish forward, Colak, who won the Golden Boot about 5 years
    ago, was recently arrested and sentenced to 2 years imprisonment in
    Turkey for attempting to smuggle a car into the country.
    
    Dom

    
    re .25 
    
    Maybe not but I bet he'd swop Colin Jackson for David Gedge.
    
    UK_Music infiltration here.
    
    Andy

    .23
    
    Quite right Matt, I think all Welsh people get wound up about the
    (ENGLISH/BRITISH) thing.  Americans are the worst for it, they assume
    that because you come from Britain your English, half of them have
    never even heard of Wales.
    
    Trev

    >Quite right Matt, I think all Welsh people get wound up about the
    >(ENGLISH/BRITISH) thing.  Americans are the worst for it, they assume
    >that because you come from Britain your English, half of them have
    >never even heard of Wales.
    
    Quite frankly, I think this is true the world over. I spend my life
    here in Italy pointing out to the locals (not all, mind) that the
    Scots, Welsh and Irish (yes, even those from the Republic) are *not*
    subsets of the English, but it's a losing battle.
    
    Only last week, I had the following conversation with a colleague
    (regarding a common acquaintance who happens to be Welsh):
    
    ME: So you've met X, have you?
    HIM: Yes, nice guy. He's English, isn't he?
    ME: Welsh actually.
    
    At which point, he errupted into laughter, clapped me on the back, and
    said that I had a great sense of humour (I've never got such an easy
    laugh in my life ;-))
    
    If it consoles you, Matt, I can tell you that last year the Italian
    ceefax service recently showed the following league table for the
    European Pro-Circuit Golf (or whatever you golf fanatics call it):
    
    1 Woosnam (Wales)
    2 Montgomerie (Scotland)
    3 Faldo (Great Britain)
    .
    .
    .
    .
    
        
    I didn't sleep for a week...NOT!!
    
    Dom

>>    I don't want to get anti-American here, but the image that is
>>    presented of them over here is one of complete ignorance about anything
>>    that isn't happening in their own state.
    
    I suppose that happens when you come from the most powerful nation on
    earth - things happening anywhere else become unimportant.
    
    If it's any consolation to you, I met an American this weekend who
    thought Manchester was in Wales. He'd seen a map of Britain and assumed
    the large blue line up the middle (the M1) was the Welsh/English
    border (not sure where he thought Scotland was?). 
    He didn't know the world cup had taken place in the States either,
    and he didn't care. 
    
    Al

    congratulations to the last 25 or so notes. I've spotted at least a
    half dozen potential ratholes....just leave us unbiased Irish out of
    the argument....
    
    ps, late result from Stuttgart....Rep of Ireland 1 - 0 England
    					Houghton
    			 		 Euro88

    I'm surprised at the lack of knowledge of global events as I've never
    met an American who doesn't claim to be part-Irish, Polish, Italian,
    etc.
    
    Lets face it, the only reason they got the world cup was money and lots
    of it. FIFA really don't give a monkey's stuff whether they create a
    professional league or whether they sink...
    
    Right now I've got that off my chest, I wondered if we could try and
    solve this damn golden boot question (please)
    
    Stuart
    
    ps Is this still the Swansea topic or not?
    
    

    Matt,
    
    I hate to get picky but Anthony Hopkins was actually born in Port
    Talbot, which is some 12 miles from Swansea.
    
    Trev
    
    P.S. Do you log into every conference MATT !!
    

Trev,

Look at your postcode.  It says SA14, or something (no, hang on, thats probably 
turksville).  Anyway, it *is* in Swansea, just like Chelsea is *in* London.  
Port Talbot is part of Swansea, just like Morriston, or Penllergaer!

As for logging into every conference.....you should know!  You're bl**dy 
following me!

    A few back someone mentioned taking a British althletics tournament to
    Sheffield (quite right too!). This brings me onto a point which gets my
    back up. Why don't England play all over England instead of just at
    Wembley? They should really be called The Home Counties because only
    people in and around London get the chance to see them.
    
    The Spanish take the team all over and to Seville, presumably because
    the crowd is so hostile, for the really important matches. On the other
    hand the smaller footballing nations come to Wembley and play their
    hearts out simply for the reason that they are playing at one of the
    most famous stadiums in the world. I'm sure that playing in front of
    35,000 baying Yorkshiremen, Lancastrians or Geordies would be much
    better than a half-full Wembley.
    
    Paul.
    

    The main reason is that the FA are into Wembley with a stonking
    contract which prevents England playing anywhere else in England until
    either 2002/2004. This is why the new National Stadium that is
    continually gets proposed will never get off the ground. The trouble is
    that the FA place too much attendance to the "drawing power" of
    Wembley with foreign FA's. Personally, i think England would do better
    playng at Old Trafford or St James' Park with perhaps a hostile 30000
    crowd than they would with 50000 at Wembley. indeed when Utd get round
    to putting the third tier at OT, it will be a better stadium than
    Wembley.
    
    Stuart

    matt,
    
    aren't Swansea really only the third best team in Wales based on number 
    of Welsh Cup wins?
    
    and we have more F.A Cup wins than you (na na na)
    
    Regards,
    
    Andrew.D.Wicks (ex CF5 postcode)

    CF5 isn't Llandaff it's Canton

    
    
    Shouldn't all you Welsh bods support rugby and leave football to the
    countries that are actually capable of winning the world cup ?
    
    What have Cardiff, Wrexham and that other lot ever won beside one FA
    Cup victory in 1927 .
    
    Paul

    
    Well, they've regularly won the Welsh Cup (well, when Hereford &
    Shrewsbury aren't winning it!!! 8-)
    
    JBG

    Paul,
    
    You don't really want me to list all our Welsh Cup winning years
    do you?? (:==:) i'd have see the doctor about treatment for Cunnovitis
    
    and we reached the european cup winners cup semis once too 
    and well ....
    a lot more successful than two other teams in wales.
    
    regards,
    
    Andrew.D.Wicks
    P.S big Nev came from Wales and he's a lot taller than all the midgets
        in the everton side so yah boo sucks

    Actually, Swansea won the Autoglass trophy last season.  The final was
    at (spit) Wembley, and the attendance was something like 50 thousand. 
    That's a lot more people than England's national side tend to get for
    your average bog-standard trouncing of johnny-foreigner.

    Stuart,
    
    I knew about the contract but I think it shows what the FA really are
    like when they tie themselves into a long contract without even
    considering that someone outside the Home Counties might actually want
    to see their national side and that it might even be in Englands favour
    to play at another venue. Also they didn't seem to see the changing
    nature of the game (all seater stadia, people expecting better
    facilities and service).
    
    Paul.
    

    Andrew,
    
    
    As a previous note said, the Welsh clubs only win the Welsh cup when
    Shrewsbury or Hereford have an off-day.....
    
    Okay so Big Nev's Welsh and Barry Horne (C*ap player, but scored one of
    the most important goals in Everton's history so I'll forgive him) but
    on the other hand so is DAI DAVIES he was the worst goalie I've ever
    seen.
    
    Paul
    
    PS Matt - Autoglass trophey - you're clutching at straws now..

    Re -2
    
>>    the most important goals in Everton's history so I'll forgive him) but
>>    on the other hand so is DAI DAVIES he was the worst goalie I've ever
>>    seen.
    
    Now, hang on a minute Watty, everyone knows that us English bigots only
    take the p*!@ out of Scottish goalies. Let's not go diluting the
    argument by talking about crap taffies as well !
    
    Rob
    
    ;-)

    re .52
    
    Paul,
    
    Couldn't agree more. The front row of the chamber at FA Council
    meetings is apparently called Death Row because all of its occupants
    are over 70 years old. That kind of sums up what is fundamentally wrong
    with the powers that be. The normal retirement age is 65 but like all
    other "establishments" the FA mistake length of service for quality of
    service when they let "pink gin swilling old dodderers" continue to
    have the power and influence. Bring in the young blood I say.
    
    On the subject of England playing elsewhere, I live in the home
    counties and would rather watch England anywhere other than Wembley 
    
    Stuart

    
    Re .53
    
>>    ......DAI DAVIES he was the worst goalie I've ever seen.
    
    I have only one thing to say to this..........
    
    
    				Alan Rough
    
    8-)
    
    JBG

    
    Yeh but Alan Rough never played for Everton - it was very depressing
    watching Dai make a brilliant save one minute, then let the ball roll
    through his legs the next.
    
    At least Alan Rough played for Scotland so you could laugh at him....
    
    Paul
    
    PS - Add Ruth Madoc to the Welsh 'hall of fame'

    
    and.....Prince Charles
    
    
    Ps. did you know he's been offered a directorship with Tampax Corp. 8-)
    
    JBG

    Re: -1   >>   I like to think
    
    Definitely a first for a Welshman !!!
    
    
    Yours helpfully,
    
    Jerry.

    
    Matt,
    
    	any ideas whats happened to the RUGBY conf. I keep getting node
    unobtainable!
    
    JBG

Haven't got a clue, mate.

It's been down since yesterday lunchtime-ish.

At the risk of polluting this conf with rugby (!), the Welsh team to face SA 
follows :

Clement
Proctor
Hall
Taylor (pontypool)
Hill
Jenkins
Moon
Evans
Jenkins
Davies
Jones
Llewellyn
Taylor
Collins (!)
Lewis

Absolute tripe, I think you'll agree.

Mind you, you are a Cardiff supporter, so I expect you'll think Hill is a 
wonderful choice!

Unbelievably, Vinny Jones has made himself available for the Welsh squad for 
the forthcoming Bulgaria match.  His grandfather was from North Wales, and 
according to new FIFA rules, he is therefore eligable to play for Wales.

What's the world coming to, for god's sake?

    
    Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo I can't be true. Please. Wales are bad but
    we don't need him.
    
    JBG

It's true.  And I quote :

"I am honoured.  I had given up hope.  Now I might join a choir"


Puleeeeeeez.  

    I know I know - I'll delete it before it gets set hidden, humble apologies
    to all sheep  err err I mean Welsh noters.

    Paul

    Well it had to happen. If memory serves, young Vincent tried to prove
    he was Irish a while ago and failed so the Welsh and the Scots were his
    next targets. 
    
    Trouble with this is that Vinnies grasp of the English language isn't
    spectacular so christ knows how he will cope with Welsh. It would be
    amusing to see him mark some of the world's greater players such as
    Baggio. Presumably the Welsh management are going to teach him how to
    say "I'm going to kick your b!@$#@ks so hard, you'll be wearing them as
    earrings" in 15 different languages ;-)
    
    Stuart

    Speaking of which - did anyone see the enlightening discussion between
    Danny Baker and Fat Boy on Sat night on BBC1 ???  He told a hilarious
    story about Vinnie Jones.   They certainly are lads aren't they ???
    
    Ray

Who did Swansea/Middlesborough draw in the next round?  I remember it was a 
choice of premiership giants.  It wasn't Blackburn/Newcastle was it?

Hmmm...Probably just as well we go out to 'boro then.

The bookies were offering 1000-1 on Swansea for the cup on Friday, and 
something much better for Wrexham (300-1 I think).  I wonder if Wrexham's odds 
have changed.

Anyone know when the Middlesborough v Swansea replay is/was, please?

    >>Anyone know when the Middlesborough v Swansea replay is/was, please?
    
    It'll be next week GEORGEM - probably Tuesday or Wednesday.

Thanks, EDWARDSD

    
    
    And so far tonight its;
    
    Middlesboro.........0    Swansea..........1

    
    
    Final score
    
    Middlesborough........1  Swansea............2
    
    
    Wee shock here methinks.

    
    That lines up an away tie at the winners of tonight's match........
    ie. Blackburn or Newcastle.
    
    JBG

Hoorah!  At least Swansea'll be able to get some cash out of this year's cup.  
Hope Bryan Robson is crying into his cornflakes at this moment.

BTW, Don Howe named as full-time English team coach.  It's not clear who'll be 
responsible for kicking his teeth in, and installing the 54 seats.

Stolenjokes 'R' Us.

Please can someone remind me when Newcastle play Swansea?

>Please can someone remind me when Newcastle play Swansea?

This Saturday - 28th.

g

    >Please can someone remind me when Newcastle play Swansea?
    
    	Shouldn't that be
    
    	"Please can someone remind me when Newcastle are going to knocked
    	 Swansea out of the FA Cup?
    
    	Rick.

What, like "Can someone remind me when Middlesborough are going to knock 
Swansea out of the cup"???? 

Looks like Swansea will be concentrating on the Welsh cup and heading for the 
play offs this year.  No retaining the Autoglass trophy this year, after those 
Brummies with the manageress beat us in extra time - 3 - 2.

pah! 

    Can it be !!
    
    Surely their aren't 2 Matt Georges !!
    
    But wait, whats this ?
    
    Matthew George of Reading, has got a letter read out on Points of View
    in front of the viewing TV nation !!
    
    Remarkable. Unfortunately Matt, I was so stunned by seeing your name
    appear on my TV screen that I didn't notice what your letter was about. 
    
    Sorry.
    
    
    Ian.

YES!  I WAS SPOTTED!

I was trying to prove the theory that in order to maintain their ratio of 
e-mails read out every week, they'll read any old crap out.  In the event, they 
happened to read my old crap out.  I missed most of it, cos I was watching the 
bloody rugby on SKY, but I caught the end of it.

Famous at last....maybe Warhol was right...points of view is on for 15 minutes, 
ain't it......

    
    Matt
    	Points of View was cut short last night cos of the prime ministers
    live speech to the nation so your moment of fame only lasted 10 minutes.
    Hard luck.
    
    	For those of us who missed this veritable televisual feast I don't
    suppose you would like to tell us what you were talking about ? You
    weren't trying to ascertain the nation's opinion on Patsy Kensit's
    hooters perchance ?
    
    Malc.
    

I'm afraid it was terribly dull, and irrelevant.  I wrote it on a day when I 
was particularly narked at the OJ Simpson bull$h!t that is continually on the 
cable.  Seeing as CNN doesn't appear to have a show in the style of points of 
view, I thought it'd be a grin if I wrote into the BBC and complained to them.  
A couple of us got together and thought out what we'd have to write in order 
for them to screen it.  We decided that there had to be some ar$e licking, some 
criticism, and some "humour".  If you want, I can post it in here, so long as 
some tetchy mod doesn't come along and stamp on it.

BLIMEY!  ANNE ROBINSON RAISED HER F*****G EYEBROW AT ME!

Matt$celebrity.

    
    Go on Matt, post it here.
    
    JBG
    
    Ps. we all know the real reason you got together with some mates is so
    they could help you with the grammar and spelling. 8-)

Alright, Jon.  As I said, it isn't particularly interesting, and I thought my 
grammar was Okay in the first place!  ;-)

err...just so this has some kind of football relevance (Soccer, that is, not Am. 
Ftbl.), ummm......BRISTOL CITY!!!!

Dear Points of View,

The BBC has always struck me as being a somewhat innovative television 
broadcaster.  It has always been the leader, not the follower.  However, I'm 
getting tired of the way that America is dictating our news these days.  I 
don't know of a single person who is the slightest bit interested in the trial 
of O.J.Simpson.  Thankfully, the BBC's coverage of his trial is only periodic, 
unlike some commercial stations, but it appears that when we're a bit low on 
news in Britain, you dredge up the Simpson case.  WE DON'T CARE!  He may be a 
star in America, but he is a nobody in the UK.  We know him, firstly as this 
American chap who is on trial for murder, and secondly  as a bit-part actor in 
some rather dodgy films.

I, for one, would even rather have stereotypical stories about pandas being 
unable to mate, than be subjected to this nonsense!  At the moment, it appears 
that more coverage is being allocated to Simpson than was allocated to a much 
more significant case of a certain Mr.Frederick West, not so long ago.

Please, BBC, be the leaders, (not the followers), once again.  Bring us some 
news that is relevant to us in Britain.

Yours Sincerely,
Matthew George, Reading.

    Brilliant !!!
    
    A breath-taking display of innovative and concise writing that should
    be considered for a Booker Prize !!! :-)
    
    NOT !!!
    
    
    Ian.

If you send in a "breath-taking display of innovative and concise writing that 
should be considered for a Booker Prize", they ain't gonna show it, are they!  
You've got to write the typical "Why, oh why..." type letter to get aired.  
Anyway, we only did it to see whether POV are so dumb that they'd read it out, 
and the conclusion was that they certainly are.

    
    I'm impressed Matt.......you obviously have some friends who can at
    least spell. 8-)
    
    JBG

    
    	They know some quite big words as well. I DID notice a passing
    remark on the sexual habits of animals however. Who contributed that
    bit then ? (Don't all answer at once).
    
    Malc.
    

    Matt,
    
    Could you forward your letter to Mr ted Turner and jane Fonda care of
    CNN Center in downtown Atlanta GA cos if you think it's bad in the U.K you
    should try and survive one evening with 53 channels of O.J - he's even
    on the Home Shopping Channel and even on the ITN World News (Live from
    London!) we have to put up with it...
                                         
    
    Regards
    
    Andrew.D.Wicks
                                         

You have my deepest sympathies.  3 channels of 24 hour cable coverage is bad 
enough, but to have it on any more channels would make me even more unstable 
than I am at present.



er.....BRISTOL CITY....er....Ashton Gate.....umm....thingy Tinian...er....more 
pointless football references.......

    How sad, when your only claim to fame is that you had a letter
    read out on POV.... 
    
    Rick.
    

    You, of course, know quite a lot about being sad, Rick. At least Matt
    is capable of writing an original letter (well, admittedly with a
    little help from his friends !). Imagine how sad it would be to have to
    rely on compositions lifted off the Internet as your claim to fame !
    
    Jerry. ;-)  (Half-hearted). 

    what Matt doesn't tell you is that he originally wrote the letter with
    his crayon set but his friends then had to (1) show him how to write in
    joined up script and (2) check his spelling 8^)
    
    Stuart

It izzunt my ownlee clame too faim.  I've been on tellee a phew timez now, so 
I'm well faymuss.

Matt (aged 13 - friend of Chantelle)

p.s. Rick, what's your claim to fame then?

    
    Can anyone tell me if big Keith (sky) Walker is still playing for
    Swansea, and if he is is he playing , is it good or bad.
    We worked to-gether up in Scotland before he hit Stardome, and also
    played in the same juvenile team.
    
    					cheers,
    
    						The Bizzo.

    
    Jeem,
    
    Who is this person "Stardome" you refer to ? And why did Keith hit 
    him ?
    
    8*))
    
    

    Heres some info about Keith Walker from a mate who's a big Swansea fan:
    
    ***********************************************************************
    
    Keith Walker is playing in Central Defence for Swansea after a
    long injury spell last season. He is probably one of the most
    underated defenders in the division. Keith having been converted
    from midfield to Central defender can play the ball from the
    centre of the defence linking with the midfield very well. Our
    defence just isnt the same if he aint playing....Jon
    
    ***********************************************************************
    
    Trev

Can someone please post the current 2nd division table somewhere in here today?


Cheers.

    Is there anything in particular you want to know ?  I've got a paper
    with the league table in it, but I don't fancy typing the whole thing
    in !

Okay, how many points are the Swans off the 5th place team, and how many points 
are Cardiff <spit> from the next team above them?

Cheers,

    Swansea are 8pts behind Blackpool who are in 5th place but Swansea have
    played 3 games fewer.  
    
    Cardiff are 3rd botton, 4 pts behind the next team.

Cheers.  w.r.t. the table, No thx.  I've moved to Winnersh, so by the time it 
got here, it would've changed!  I suppose I can always keep uptodate with old 
Ceefax.

IMPORTANT, NAY (Arsenal reference...oops) CRUCIAL, RESULT.

Swansea City 16 - 0 Pembroke

phew, close one.

    is this the welsh cup? what round is it up to.
    
    regards
    
    Andrew.D.wicks

Didn't ex-Arsenal favourite, Martin Hayes , grab a few?

Stuart

Don't know any of the details.  I assume it was the Welsh cup tho'.

Oxford 1 - Swansea 2

Ha!  2nd goal was a penalty scored by keeper Roger Freestone.  Stick that in 
your pipe and smoke it, Andrew Melville (if he's still there, that is - 
defector!)

EXCLUSIVE-----------------SWANSEA SIGN JOHN HARTSON!--------------------

In an amazing move, Hartson cites "ambition" as his prime motivator in his 
unexpected move back to his home town.  He feels that he "has more of a 
footballing future" at Swansea, and that Arsenal was proving to be a "graveyard 
of ambition".

Amongst those likely to follow Hartson back down the M4, are Barry Horne, Chris 
Coleman, and amazingly, Nick Barmby.

You heard it here first... 

    Too much sun eh Matt ?

    Matt,
    
    Had a couple of shandy's down the pub at dinnertime?
    
    Stuart

So I was bored, Okay!?!

Anyway....could happen...!

    
    >444.123*
    
    What does the asterisk after the note number mean ?
    
    Inquisitive of Ayr.
    

Conference attached.  Press Keypad 7, and watch in disbelief.


It's not really worth it...I was *very* bored....

    OK.

    I hit Keypad 7, got entry GAWD added to directory.

    Tried open GAWD, got File Specification Syntax Error.

    So what bit am I supposed to disbelieve ?

I believe it should go something like....


ARSE::GAWD,I'M_BLOODY_BORED added to your notebook  		...Press RETURN


It isn't a conference, I was just bored...<sigh>

Oh well, explaining this has taken up some time, so it's relieved the boredom 
for a short time.

    
    I definitely only got the GAWD bit, no Press RETURN.
    
    Things sound pretty bad down there Matt. Why not come up this end of
    the country and give me a hand with my stuff ? I'm up to my flipping
    eyes. In fact I don't even have time to write this ...
    

Oh, I've got some work....it's just dull, mundane work....

You probably only got the GAWD bit, cos I put a comma in the title. Try kp7 on 
my last note; that one should be Okay.  On 2nd thoughts, don't bother,  It's 
not remotely interesting.... 8-{,

    Matt,
    
    Have you been paid yet ?  I seem to recall some vague promise of a
    drink ........

shit.  umm...yep.

    Excellent - right then, Drinkies II is on.  Replies to note 479 please.
    How long do we have before you're spent up, Matt ?

    sorry to interrupt the flow, but can anyone tell what's happened to the
    rugby conf?...node SHAWBY:: is unreachable, (from Scotland, anyhoo)....
    
    back to football....
    
    Ray....

    
    	Same for me, Ray. Bummer.
    
    	Andy.

Has it disappeared with those interesting people for South Queensferry?

As Matt George was a mod of it we should divert all flak in his direction 
(smiley thing)

John

Watch it, y'arse!  I don't know what's happened to it.  Where's SHAWBY located?  
I assumed that it was Warrington...

All,

Each year, usually when the sun peeks out from behind those nasty rain clouds, 
I dust off my bike, oil the chain, pump up those tyres, and start getting in 
training for the big event.

"What event would this be?", I hear you cry.  Well, every year, in South Wales, 
there is a spate of "Charidee" bike rides.  Foolishly, I only tend to take part 
in the longest and most difficult one, the "South Wales Bike Ride".  The title 
is somewhat misleading, in that it only goes around the extremely hilly Gower 
peninsula.  This ride takes in hills that require a change down to 1st gear in 
your average family saloon car, and hence require more than a little leg power 
for your average 6'1", <insert large number between 10 and 20> stone Welshman 
on his Marin Mountain scaler.  This year's ride is on July the 9th (this coming
weekend).

The trek covers over 36 miles of beautiful South Wales coastline and valleys, 
and is usually participated in by over 7000 people (a heck of a lot of bikes 
to be ambling through the narrow lanes of Gower).

If the idea of me attempting to ride my bike over hills steeper than you could 
imagine (probably in the rain), amuses you, or makes you sit there with a warm 
glow of smugness and satisfaction, then prepare your cash for a donating 
situation.  The event is run for the benefit of the British Heart Foundation.  
I try and get a load of sponsors, and then bring my medal & certificate back to 
prove that I completed the course.  

If anyone is public spirited enough (of course you are) to help raise some cash 
for a charidee that a fair proportion of us will eventually/inevitably require 
the help of (in one way or another), speak up now.  Any contributions (However 
reasonably small) are welcome.

When cash is called for, I don't mind taking cheques (made out to the B.H.F.), 
so that there's no question of the money's ultimate destination.  As proof of 
my completion of the ride, I'll make a few .gifs available to people who aren't
based here at Winnersh or Reading, so that they can see my knackered state at 
various points around the course, and can see my lovely little brassy medal.

Thanks to contributions from a couple of other conferences, I'm up to over a 
hundred pounds at the moment.  I'd lo9ve to be able to go over the 200 pound 
mark, so dig deep into your pockets, and mail me if you feel like contributing.

Many thanks,

Matt.
Matthew George@WLC
CHEFS::GEORGEM
CHEFS::ANNWAT::MATT
[email protected]

    
    Matt
    
    	Try putting the bite on Dave Edwards. I know for a fact that he has
    fifteen quid.
    
    Malc.
    

    It's already gone Malc - you don't fancy another wager do you, I'm
    short of a few quid at the moment ?

re .138

Malc, seeing as you're so easily separated from your cash, maybe you'd like to 
follow suit!?!

    Dave
    
    	You mean you've already spent ALL of it ????!!!! You spendthrift !
    It's quite obvious that all your holidays in Scotland are having no effect
    on you whatsoever.

    	How about a bet on the Tour de France ? I'll have Miguel Indurain,
    you can have Matt George. I'll give you odds...

    Matt
    
    	I'd love to but I have Dave Edwards to support (and I am an
    ex-resident of Aberdeen as well).
    
    Malc.
    

    
    Can any Swansea fan help.
    
    My old mate Mark "Curly" Harris spent a number of seasons 
    running around in the back four...
    
    Is he still there ??? if not where has he gone ???
    
    Pj

I read something about our "Chopper" Harris recently.  I can't for the life of 
me remember what, though.  Anyway, until recently he was still there, I 
believe.

hmm...might've been the Guinness book of records entry of "Most yellow and red 
cads in the Endsleigh"!

m.

According to BBC Wales, favourites for the new Welsh manager job are;

BFR
Neville Southall
Brian Flynn (Wrexham)
Kevin Ratcliffe

Obviously BFR is the desired chap, and he has expressed an interest.  However, 
I'd guess that he'd command a much higher salary than the others.

    I think BFR would make an excellent international manager.  His big
    strength is his ability to motivate players for one-off games, and I'm
    sure he would relish working with some of the quality players available
    to Wales at the moment (that's not a piss-take - honest !).  

    
    	I thought BFR would only be interested if the job was part-time.
    Oh hang on, didn't John Toshack have a go at that ?
    
    Malc.
    

>>>What am I doing in this note ? 

I dunno.  Sod off y'great big Scottish stereotype, you.

FWIW, I can't see them snaring BFR.  The administration is a joke, and I'd be 
amazed if they could be organised enough to attract the old fool to the job 
sufficiently.  However, as Dave said, it's a challenge with some pretty good 
possibility.  Maybe he could do a Jack Charlton...

m.

    
    > y'great big Scottish stereotype
    
    Bitch.
    

    I think Vinny Jones would make a great player-manager, isn't it....
    
    Ray, boyo....
    
    ps, Matt, how was Ireland?, or has the drink dulled your memory
    already?...  8_o

It was superb, thanks.  Hoping to go back for the rugby international next 
year...Hoping to try the remainder of Dublin's 1000 pubs out...

Matt$still_hazy

    Matt,
    
    Being our resident expert on Swansea, I notice one of last nights
    scorers was a chappie called Ampadu. Is this Kwame ampadu, formerly of
    WBA & Arsenal Youth System. If so, wasn't Martin Hayes enough or do
    Swansea like dodgy wingers from Arsenal?

    re .dodgy wingers from Arsenal.
    
    Swansea eh? Eddie McGoldrick's next club by the looks of things.

re .151

Aren't *all* Arsenal players dodgy whingers?
btw, umm....yes, I think.

Matt$invitingMancshilarity.

Now I'm not sure about this, because this bloke's name is similar to a RL 
player's, but I think soe geezer called Bobby Gould has been appointed Welsh 
manager.  Name rings a bell, but I'm rogered if I can remember his credentials, 
as it were.  Info please....

Ex-Arse and just about every other team as a player.

Ex-Coventry & Wombles manager among others.  Currently a writes a crap
weekly column in the Today & occasional 'expert' for TV.  Has a good skill
at plucking players from obscurity & making them Premiership players who
the Wombles sell on for outrageous fees!

Anyone got any info on this business about Cantona playing for the Swans in a 
testimonial?

FWIW, Cantona will be playing for Swansea against Wales, on Oct. 9th, I 
believe.  This is a testimonial for some old codger who scouted Alex Ferguson, 
hence Cantona's appearance.  Apparently, it'll be his first official match 
back.

    I thought he was going to be playing on Oct 1st against Liverpool?

Well, Cheerio everyone.  This is my final day, so I'll just say that it's been 
"interesting" and generally amusing noting in here.  I enjoyed the erm...banter 
that goes on in here, and I basked in that brief moment of glory when I was at 
the top of the predictions table on week 1 of this season.  <sigh> 
I wish you all well, and hope my stay here hasn't been too painful.  Talking of 
pains, give my regards to Paneso/Panesy/Pannekker/Paneschelskis/Panestrong as 
well.  Tell him he's still a git.

Iechyd da, 
Matt.

    Best of luck for the future, Matt.
    
    And may Wales steer clear of Western Samoa (XV) and Moldavia (XI) in
    the future ;-) (Cryptic enough for you?)
    
    Nice noting with ya...
    
    Dom
    
    P.S. What did you mean when you said: "I'm no flippin' Taff"?
    

    Dom
    
    >P.S. What did you mean when you said: "I'm no flippin' Taff"?
    
    He's denying his birthright. He actually wants to be English.
    
    Stuart

Dom,

Gewn ni Gorffen means "Let's finish", or "Can we finish".

"I'm no flippin' Taff" was referring to the fact that to us 
"South Westerners", a Taff is someone from Cardiff (it originates from thr 
river Taff, y'see), and we don't tend to get on with that lot...except JBG of 
course.

    Stuart,
    
    Thought as much...I bet he's suffering. Awright, Matt - from today on 
    (i.e. in your absence), we'll refer to you as Matt "Ponsonby-Smythe" 
    George...man of England ;-)
    
    Dom
    
    P.S. There must be some pun in there about St. George slaying the
    (Welsh) dragon, but I'm damned if I can find it. 
                     

    
    Bye Matt.
    
    I've enjoyed reading your notes. Your good humour will be missed.
    Are you going to let us know what you're going to do beyond Digital?
    
    Neil

    
    Neil,
    
    Lucky old sod is off back to college for a year of drunken debauchery!
    
    Best of luck matt,
    
    Ian.

    See ya's Matt.
    
    Don't forget to come and visit us down in Pompey.
    
    I take it you've got Ants number etc.
    
    Hopefully see you's again soon.
    
    Trev$another_student_bum_who's_off_soon.

    Best of luck, Matt !!
    
    I'll say ta ta in this note rather thatn go round allthe other
    conferences that we meet up in.
    
    May the Wildhearts reign in your record collection for a long time (I'm
    sorry but they'll never reign in mine !!)
    
    I hope that your rugby career flourishes under the new WRU management,
    and that your given your chance like all the other kids that are
    playing for Wales at the moment !!
    
    And who knows, if Cantona plays well for Swansea, Moan Utd might be
    persuaded to let him go !!
    
    
    Cheers,
    
    		Ian.
    
    

    I'm rationing the goodbyes Matt so you'll get one in another
    conference.
    
    Barry.

    Well, just been with Mr Edwards to say goodbye to Matthew and
    basically, we got ignored (not that I blame him but it is something he
    will regret). I think it was something to do with the fact
    that he was with 5/6 women (of varying ages although one young lady was
    a bit of a babe). For the record Matt had a pint of a Hawley but it was
    a Hawley Special. A nice little pint of coke, complete with stirrer,
    ice and a slice, two cherries (good to see you didn't lose them) and an
    umbrella.  
    
    Hmmm, Matt's beer-swilling, anti-Greenpeace, student-of-the-world
    reputation may well take a bit of a battering this afternoon.
    
    Stuart

    >>although one young lady was
        a bit of a babe
    
    Shebnam perhaps? Definatley not Hayley.
    
    >>Matt had a pint of a Hawley 
    I thought you said Hayley then!!!  :-O

    >Shebnam perhaps? Definatley not Hayley.
    
    Dunno, long(ish) dark hair. Whats this Hayley look like. Oh and by the
    way,  
    
    >Definatley
    
    	part of your grant could usefully be spent on a dictionary.
    
    Stuart

re Stuart

The babe in question was the rather wonderful, even though she's foreign...,  
Shebnem.

The Coke was a mixer in between my pint of Krony and my pint of Caffreys.

Matt$Sheb_fan_but_not_a_Hawley.

    Matt,
    
    re the coke, etc. 
    
    Yeah, yeah we believe you.
    
    Stuart

    Matt,
    
    Face facts - you were a great big girlie-woofter in the pub today.  I'm
    only sorry it took us so long to find out !

    I could have told you he's a big gurls blouse ages ago.

re .176

I'll break your legs, Eric...

re James and beached

Chaps, I'm glad you took pleasure in another man's misfortune.  You sick, sick 
lads.

    
    I don't know. I have 1 pint of coke in my entire life and no-one lets
    me forget it!
    
    Talk about giving a dog a bad name!
    
    Hawley$coke_peddlar

>>   <<< Note 444.166 by COMICS::HAWLEYI "Mr Flibble says: Game Over Boys!" >>>
>>                         -< try and avoid the library >-

    
    
    
>>    Lucky old sod is off back to college for a year of drunken debauchery!
    
      no change there then !
    
>>    Best of luck matt,
    
      You've probably already departed, but ditto (except on November 25th
    when The 'Pies will wreak havoc at the Vetch)
    
    Cheers
    
    Rob
    

Thanks all.

I'm off in about 20 mins, so I'll bid a final farewell.

Best wishes,
m.

    Matt,
    
    We miss you; especially after results like Saturday's !
    
    Rob