| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 614.1 | convenient, delightful, charming = small | MARVIN::MACHIN | | Tue Jan 17 1989 16:24 | 10 |
| I'm looking right now. Over here, a popular term is 'delightful'.
Everything is delightful, even an outside toilet. 'Delightful victorian
cloakroom adjacent to rear'.
Also, it's surprising how a house can be extended and
enhanced, never just one or the other.
Keep your rear on your delightful cloakroom,
Richard.
|
| 614.2 | From the anent's mouth | FLASH9::KALLIS | Anger's no replacement for reason. | Tue Jan 17 1989 17:51 | 11 |
| Picked up in _The New Yorker_ was an Estate Agent's radio ads for
a condominium complex in Clearwater, Florida. Apparently the complex
was anything but small, and perhaps the Estate Agent's radio ad
spoke truer than he or she knew when it advised listeners,
"You must really visit [name of complex] to fully appreciate the
enormity of it."
Riiiiiight on!
Steve Kallis, Jr.
|
| 614.3 | We could market it in a low key fashion, sir | MARVIN::MACHIN | | Tue Jan 17 1989 18:22 | 14 |
| Here's a good one: "low-key marketing".
This is a means by which agent B sells your house while you have
an agreement with agent A that he/she, (i.e. agent A), is to be the
sole agent.
The phrase is supposed to allow both you and agent B to think you're
not doing the dirty on agent A. (You still get thew 'sole agent' lower
commission deal, while agent A never finds out what's happened).
Low key marketing actually involves surreptitious visits to the
house, under-the-table spec sheets and the like.
Richard.
|
| 614.4 | RealEstateSpeak - a non-communicative language | HSSWS1::GREG | Malice Aforethought | Tue Jan 17 1989 20:53 | 34 |
|
One of my favorite Real Estate Agent gimicks is "No Money
Down". Somehow, closing costs and earnest money are not
considered to be "money down" on a deal.
My brother tried to break into the real estate game a few
years ago on one of those "No money down, get rich quick" plans.
He had no money to put down, and found he was unable to acquire
any property without some cash. Duh! Needless to say, I was
anything but amazed at his decision to seek alternative employment,
particularly since he'd been sponging off me while trying to get
started in real estate.
And have you ever seen HUD homes? In RealEstateSpeak, these
are referred to as "fixer-uppers". You're usually better off
buying a vacant lot and erecting a log cabin than trying to fix
up one of these "bargain homes".
And repos... don't even talk to me about repos! I've had
it up to here with repos (see figure 1)!
Death to Real Estate Agents --+
| <-- I've had it up to here
Can't stand it any more --+
|
Uncontrollable fits of rage --+
|
I'm getting annoyed now --+
|
Get out of my face --+
Figure 1
- Greg
|
| 614.5 | Imaginary Estate Spelling? | DRUMS::FEHSKENS | | Thu Jan 19 1989 21:35 | 11 |
| Real Estate Agents apparently can't spell either:
disceptive
numberous
avolve
Or maybe they have larger vocabularies than I suspect? These look
like interesting words.
len.
|
| 614.6 | | EAGLE1::EGGERS | Tom, VAX & MIPS architecture | Thu Jan 19 1989 23:41 | 3 |
| "disceptive"?
Does that mean the septic system isn't working?
|
| 614.7 | One For Each Hand? | DRUMS::FEHSKENS | | Fri Jan 20 1989 22:21 | 5 |
| I would have guessed it meant "predisposed to hold two sceptors"
or is that "half a sceptor"?
len.
|
| 614.8 | sic/sick | MARVIN::MACHIN | | Tue Jan 24 1989 11:55 | 6 |
| Another real one this week:
"..having the definate (sic) feature and being a distinct advantage
it is totally private ".
Richard.
|
| 614.9 | Barf | AYOV27::ISMITH | Hugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew... | Thu Jul 20 1989 15:09 | 12 |
| "Occupying a preferred second floor position within this revered
building close to the town centre."
What?????
From another ad, this time (I think) dreamed up by the owner:
"Externally clad in that most regal of timbers, the cedar."
What makes then do it?
Ian.
|