Conference thebay::joyoflex

    Run your finger along a clean plate and it'll whistle (squeek).
    A dirty one one won't.
    
    Heat water in a covered pan.  It'll make a noise when it boils,
    a kind of hiss, like air coming from a pipe.
    
    Hector was a major figure on the Trojan side of the Trojan war.
    He was young (a pup) around 1400 BC.
    
    				-John Bishop

              Are Lords always drunk ?
    
              Are judges always sober ?

    Re: .0
    
    What about the inside of a whistle when you're whittling one?
    
    [Any prizes for alliteration?]
    
    b

    Re .2:
    
    Mice aren't always quiet.
    
    Crystals aren't always clear (see quartz with inclusions).
    
    Witches' mammae aren't always cold.  Neither are their knees.
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr.

    Re: .4
    
    > Witches' mammae aren't always cold.  Neither are their knees.
    
    
    Would you care to elaborate on just how you came to obtain this 
    knowledge?  :^}
    

              Please don't tell me just accept my compliments
              on your courage in assuring scientific accuracy.
    
                                               Max

    Re .4 (Roy), .5 (Max):
    
    In deference to Max, I won't go into details.  I will hint, however:
    there are alternate sayings about those two portions of witches'
    anatomical parts. :-)
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr. 

    
    DO cookies always crumble??
    Bo

        Is rain always right ?
        Are houses always safe ?
        Is gold always good ?

    Re .9
    
    I think your last two are conflicting examples of investment advice.
    As long as the � was on the Gold Standard, gold was a safe investment
    (safe = good in some circles). More recently, houses have been more
    profitable (if not as safe).
    
    b

    Are birds always free?
    
    Are dogs always tired?
    
    Are oxen always strong?
    
    How does a horse eat?
    
    Spd

    Are rocks always solid?
    
    Ever hear of geodes? Or even pumice, for that matter?
    
    Do logs always sleep? Indeed, do logs _ever_ sleep?
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr.

    Do sleeping dogs lie?  Do dormant canines prevaricate?

   Do rivers rage?
   
   Does the wind really bite?
   
   Are cucumbers really cool?
   
   Is driven snow really pure?
   
   How long is a coon's age?
   
   

    Re .14:
    
    >Are cucumbers really cool? Actually, on a warm day, the center
    of a cucumber may be as much as 20 degrees Farenheit cooler than
    its surface.  This is due to the relatively poor thermal conductivity
    of cucumbers.
   
    >Is driven snow really pure? Depends where it's driven. :-)
   
    Steve Kallis, Jr.

    
    
    Must fires always race, then gut?
    
    Must the stock market always plunge (or plummet) in
    heavy, active, or light trading?
    
    

     re .17:
    
    >Must the stock market always plunge (or plummet) in
    >heavy, active, or light trading?
     
    No, sometimes it soars in heavy, active, or light trading.
    
    Though that's been rather rare these days ...

    
    
    When do the cows come home?
    
    How silly is a goose?
    
    How cold does it have to be for Hell to freeze over?

    
    Do a goose and a gander always agree on what sauce is?

    take my word for it..havin had some geese they are *very* silly

    Re .19:
    
    >How cold does it have to be for Hell to freeze over?
    
    Well, according to Dante (_Inferno_ of the _Divine Comedy_), the
    innermost circle of Hell is _already_ frozen mover.
    
    
    However, in real terms, I'd suggest: 
    
    -459 degrees Farenheit

    re:.22
    
    It never occurred to me until you brought this up, Steve, but
    if Dante was right, then a snowball has a pretty good chance
    in Hell after all.
    
    --- jerry

RE: .23

	I dunno -- it's still only one in seven, right?

					>>>==>PStJTT

    Re: .12
    
    True, lots of rocks aren't solid. But the version I usually hear
    is `steady as a rock'. OK, a few individual rocks aren't that stable;
    but most are - when you think of the Br English meaning of rock (which 
    rules out little pebbles).

    b

    Just how soft IS a baby's behind?
    
    Re: A while back:  I have heard the same references to a witch's
    bodily parts as to a welldigger's posterior.  Does anyone out there
    have scientific information about that old adage? :*)
    
    On a nobler quest,     
    How quiet are church mice?
                      
    Spd
    

    Re .26 (spd):
    
    >Just how soft IS a baby's behind?
    
    About as soft as it's smooth.  And how smooth _is_ it?
    
    >How quiet are church mice?
    Most mice are fairly quiet unless being attacked by cats.
    
    However, how _poor_ are churchmice?
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr.
    
    P.S.:  I haven't met any welldiggers, but I've heard the adage as
           involving their knees rather than their glutei.  On the
           other, I've already promised silence. :-)

    Churchmice, having little to forage through but the pantries of the
    clergy, are rather poor. 
    
    	Jon

    
    			, and just as flatheadded!
    

    
    How safe is a house ?
    
    How hard are nails ?
    
    Do fish drink ? And if so , how ?
    
    How bald is a coot ?
    
    And just how thick *are* two short planks ?
    
    
         
    John J
    

    Re .32:  
    
    >How hard are nails ?
    
    House or finger?
    
    >And just how thick *are* two short planks ?
    
    Should that be "plankth"? 
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr. 

    
    Re .32:  
    
>    >How hard are nails ?
>    
>    House or finger?

    Wood .
        
>    >And just how thick *are* two short planks ?
>    
>    Should that be "plankth"? 

    If you thay tho
        
    :-^;)>
      
    John J
    
    

    What is a Curate's Egg?
    
    And why is it only good in parts?
    
    Seriously, I've always been puzzled by this one ...
    
    -- brian

    The Curate's Egg is from a famous Punch cartoon in the late 19th
    century (?).  The curate is shown taking tea with his bishop, at
    which he has been served with a bad boiled egg.  Bishop asks curate
    "How is your egg?".  Curate, not wishing to offend his host, replies:
    "Parts of it are very good".

    Jeff.

Are parrots always sick?

Is Punch always pleased?

Are all posts deaf?

    I Don't know about the parrot, but In "Punch and Judy" shows Punch
    is sometimes deliriously happy! 
    
    Fence posts of wood are notoriously uncommunicative and keep secrets
    really relly well.  Now that's just between you, me, and the fence
    post.
    
    	Rick
    	Merrill
    

    For lack of a fence post, as I remember, one of the Canterbury Tales
    mentions a character who told her secret to a reed. I suspect there
    may have been a Middle English pun there (on `rede' or whatever
    the recognized spelling is - the wiser counsel that Ethelred the
    Unrede didn't take), but maybe talking to inanimate objects is an
    idea that's been around for quite a time.
    
    b

    Can somebody tell me what it means to "wear my heart on my sleeve?"

    I always figured they were wearing tears (the kind that come from your eyes)
    on their sleeves from crying or something, but recently I've been hearing
    people talk about how they wear all sorts of things on their sleeves,
    always something bad or negative.

    Recently a friend of mind said, "She wears her personal problems on her
    sleeve like a medal." That just confused me even more.

    Please help!

    - Jim

    They take some grit and crazy glue to make sandpaper out of their sleeve,
    and then they can wear anything on it.

     All it ever meant to me was that when you wore your heart, or
     whatever, on your sleeve, anyone who cared to, could understand your
     feelings/problems/whatever and you made no attempt to hide them.

             mikeP

    Wearing your heart on your sleeve meanings letting your feelings show
    to everybody.  There's a somewhat negative connotation to the phrase.
    
    					andrew