| Title: | What's all this fuss about 'sax and violins'? |
| Notice: | Archived V1 - Current conference is QUARK::HUMAN_RELATIONS |
| Moderator: | ELESYS::JASNIEWSKI |
| Created: | Fri May 09 1986 |
| Last Modified: | Wed Jun 26 1996 |
| Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
| Number of topics: | 1327 |
| Total number of notes: | 28298 |
I just realized something...I do not know how to handle rejection...
I use to...I always knew I was going to fail so therefore rejection
having been anticipated was not a surprise and I was prepared.
I have tried to develop a better attitude...I consider myself
responsible for what happens to me and I try not to put any energy in
trying to put the blame on others for my failures.
I also have a positive attitude about myself...know what I am capable
off and go after it.
I think I want to go back to putting the blame....in one situation
I know for sure I did not get something because of my age...and
I am not sure what happened today. I applied to become a Weight
Watcher leader and they said I did not have the qualities they needed
and offered me the job of a receptionist.
I am sitting here wondering if I am getting egotistical...because
I "know" I can do a better job then some of the leaders I have seen...
My first reaction was to boycott the company but then I thought
about it and I realized that the people that made the decision were
not the company...so I think I am handling it...
But I am still p*ssed!
| T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 564.1 | It's all perceptions... | CSC32::DELKER | Thu Aug 18 1988 18:53 | 16 | |
Like yourself.
Remember, too, that there's what-you-know-about-you-that-others-don't,
what-others-know-about-you-that-you-don't, what-you-and-others-know-
about-you, and what-neither-you-nor-others-know. Maybe there's
something you know about yourself that makes you confident that
you would be a good Weight Watchers leader, but it's not apparent
to others. And maybe some of the other not-so-good leaders
project qualities that they don't really have. Remember, you're
dealing with the perceptions of others in this situation.
If you have good qualities which others aren't seeing, then you
might try to learn how to make them more visible. In the meantime,
be comfortable just knowing you have them.
Paula
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| 564.3 | Ask what qualities don't you have that they want? | YODA::BARANSKI | Searching the Clouds for Rainbows | Fri Aug 19 1988 10:08 | 0 |
| 564.4 | 16BITS::AITEL | Every little breeze.... | Fri Aug 19 1988 11:01 | 18 | |
I agree with Jim - find out what it is they're looking for that
they don't see in you. It's very difficult to handle a rejection
when you don't know the reason. You have to guess, and you end
up either finding something TERRIBLE in yourself, or in them, and
it doesn't solve anything either way. So ask them what qualities
they want in a leader, and which ones you need to work on. Perhaps
you could act as an assistant leader with someone who has the
qualities you are working on attaining. Volunteer to do it for
some finite period of time, to improve your skills.
What seems to be burning you up, in both the recent cases of rejection,
is your inability to do anything about them. You can't change your
age, and you can't improve something when you don't know what you're
trying to improve.
This sound right?
--Louise
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