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Conference moira::parenting_v3

Title:Parenting
Notice:READ 1.27 BEFORE WRITING
Moderator:CSC32::DUBOIS
Created:Wed May 30 1990
Last Modified:Tue May 27 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1364
Total number of notes:23848

1359.0. "STARTING OVER AGAIN!!!" by WMOIS::DIPASQUALE_S () Thu Apr 09 1992 13:15

    Hi fellow Parents,
    
    I am new to this file so please be patient. I was reading the notes
    about 2nd delivery easier and found it quite interesting. I am going
    on my 3rd child, but it has been 12 YEARS! I feel like I am really
    starting over again. Is it going to be easier than the last two, will
    I be calmer raising this one?? 
    There are so many questions I have no answers to, but would like to
    hear from anybody that has had a long time span between children.
    Maybe you can calm my fears.
    
    Thanks,
    
    Sherry
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1359.1different childrenKAOFS::M_FETTalias Mrs.BarneyThu Apr 09 1992 14:0910
    Hi Sherry,
    My brother and I have 6.5 years between us -- my mother is of the
    opinion that having Steven was like having another first child --
    first because of the length of time between us, and secondly, because
    we were SUCH DIFFERENT KIDS! I think there is a note here about spacing
    between children which you may find interesting to read. The one 
    advantage is that your other children may be able to help rather than
    hinder you in the care of your new baby. 
    
    Monica
1359.2I was a 'special blessing'MIMS::GEIGER_ABack to the real worldThu Apr 09 1992 17:3818
    Sherry,
    
    There's 11 and 14 years difference between me and my sisters, and
    my mother said it wasn't any harder to have me (she was 42).  The
    big advantage is that I kept my parents young.  They are 71 and 68,
    play golf 3 times/week, bowl, bridge, and are very active.  Your
    new baby might have trouble when it gets older from the older
    siblings still wanting to 'mother' it, even at age 21 (I did, we
    came to an understanding and are very close now).  The big disadvantage
    for me personally was that due to my parents age, and consequently
    their parents age, I wasn't able to enjoy my grandparents as my
    sisters did.  Also, my children won't be able to enjoy my parents
    as my sisters kids have (teenagers now, I have a 4month old).  
    But, I loved being an only child.  The advantages far outweigh
    the disadvantages!!!  Good luck, I think frame of mind has a lot
    to do with how tough it will be!!
    
    Angie
1359.3Large gap between my childrenDEWEYD::CHADSEYFri Apr 10 1992 10:0522
    Sherry,
    
    I am expecting my 5th child.  My child ages are 16, 15, 4 and 3.  For
    me it does feel like having two groups of children.  The older two have
    similar interest and problems as do the younger two.   I sometimes find
    it exhausting on the most part I enjoy having children this far about
    in ages.  The two oldest are very helpful with the younger ones.  
    
    I know I am much more relaxed about when the 4 and 3 year do things.  I
    believe I am enjoying thier young childhood more then I did with the
    older ones.  Also after having a rather distressing disagreement with a
    teenage it is WONDERFUL to have a little one tell you that they will
    LOVE you forever.  
    
    As for an easier delivery, I don't know.  I had C-Sections for child
    1,2, and 3.  Child #4 was delivered vaginally but was only 1 lb 4 oz so
    it really wasn't difficult at all.   I will be attempting to deliver
    baby #5  vaginally.....  
    
    Good luck and enjoy!!!!
    
    Susan   
1359.4pointerTNPUBS::STEINHARTLauraMon Apr 13 1992 09:302
    Please reference note 730, which discusses spacing between children and
    has some family stories on this topic.