Conference moira::parenting_v3

    There are two strings on alternative methods of education:
    
    35   Waldorf
    771  Montessori
    
    Laura

    I've now read at both the suggestions in .1.  Those of course don't get
    at the small, independent schools which are not part of a larger
    movement, so to speak.  Sudbury Valley School sounds like another
    Summerhill.  So many questions arise, like what if you have to move and
    there are only 'traditional' schools from which to choose?  How do the
    children take to that?  But I'm skipping ahead.  First thing is to
    understand the full range of what's out there.  
    
    I'm in correspondence with a man in California starting a school called
    the Academy of Self Governors, where the emphasis is on choice and
    independence.   He put me on to Sudbury Valley. 

    I saw an interesting documentary on PBS several months ago, about an
    alternative (private) school in California, that is one of the oldest. 
    The documentary was clearly slanted in favor of the school, granted,
    but it was very persuasive.
    
    Their graduates have done fine.  They go on to a public high school and
    perform at or above grade level, with many continuing on to college.
    
    I did not retain the name of the school, unfortunately.
    
    There must be an association for such schools, and perhaps an
    associated PTA or alumni group.  You could contact them for more
    information.  The local library should be of help.
    
    The school itself will probably be eager to answer your questions.  It
    sounds like your concerns would be those of any parent who sends their
    child there.  Have you talked to the administrators yet?   They can no
    doubt tell you about any associations to which they belong, as well as
    their philosophy of education.
    
    Laura 

I agree that the best thing is to pick up the phone and arrange for a visit.

I visited Sudbury Valley School eight years ago when looking for a school
for my son, Jamie, then four.  I really liked the feel of the place, but my
wife preferred a bit more traditional approach, so we compromised on another 
school, the Charles River School, in Dover. 

Also, I found a very detailed book in the Natick, MA, library about Sudbury 
Valley's philosophy, but probably the school has some updated literature.

What struck me the day I visited was a little boy (age 6?) who was sitting
comfortably in a massive easy chair surrounded by a pile of books.  I
commented to the school director, Mrs. Greenberg?, how happy he seemed, and
she said something like, "Oh, he just taught himself how to read two weeks
ago, and he's spent every day at school since then in that chair.  But,
he'll eventually become tired with reading and move on to the next challenge."  
I saw that as the basic concept: children "actively" involved in what they, 
themselves, were motivated to learn. 

Good luck, and it's never too early, as you say.  I found choosing the first 
school to be a major parenting decision.  Something you might also want to 
do is to make up two lists:

    What I want my child's school to be:

    What I DON't want my child's school to be:

I'd really like to hear your impressions after your visit.

    As my thinking has continued re schools, I find myself debating two
    opposite ends of the spectrum -- a complete curriculum vs. no
    curriculum at all, guiding the child (knowing what's best) vs. building
    on the child's self-knowledge of what s/he needs/can take at any time. 
    Certainly we trust this UNTIL it's time for school...we present
    opportunities but most of us don't do active "teaching" (not to mention
    that at 2 years the child won't stand or sit for it).  
    
    It also seems useful to challenge what I had been thinking which was
    basically along the lines of, if it was good enough for me (worksheets,
    drills, multiplication tables, memorizing the reigns of the kings and
    queens of england, plus a healthy dose of reading, writing, lots of
    math, in structured environments) and I turned into a reasonably
    creative person, able to survive in what is probably the world's most
    challenging, futuristic company, then my child should do the same and
    get a good liberal education in the old manner.  Then I stopped a
    moment and recognized that I had really only learnt to THINK in
    graduate school via the case study method.  From that, hearing about
    no-curriculum schools seemed a logical extension of what may be needed
    to prepare the child of today for being an adult 20 years from now.  
    
    What are the skills and abilities and knowledge someone will need 20
    years from now and how best can they acquire them?  That's a big
    question and I don't think I'm up to answering it all by myself. 
    Modifying existing schools, especially now that most of them seem to
    have degraded so much, seems a poor answer.  Are the Summerhill's and
    Sudbury Valley's the way of the future?  
    
    Educating one's child is a really big issue.  I hadn't quite expected
    this level of debate to be going on within myself.  As I write this,
    another thought pops into my mind...the image of helping Daniela with
    her homework.  I relish this idea.  But what if she had no homework
    because things were self-directed?  So many things driving major
    decisions and really only minor stuff.  Just because I have these urges
    to replicate what I felt was good about my childhood, or to do better
    things that weren't done well seems not sufficient rational reason to
    use to prepare this child for the future.  
    
    Obviously a lot comes down to trusting one's instincts in this
    parenting business, as has been said many times in these notes, but
    boy, style of education seems a real biggie.  

   See also    CRONIC::HOME_SCHOOLING
   
   This conference is fairly low-activity, but is devoted to the topic
   of home schooling.  May not be what you are interested in, but if
   you are, its out there.
   
   - Tom
   

    My nephew, now twenty-eight, went to Sudbury Valley from the time
    he would have been in fourth grade in public school to the time he
    graduated.  I don't know much about it personally, I was away in
    college etc. most of the time he was there.  I'm sure Sean would
    be willing to talk to you about his experience, by the way he loved
    it - of course my very traditional brother was always worried that
    Sean would never do more than fish all day.  By I could also ask
    my sister-in-law and brother if they would be willing to answer your
    questions, I'm sure they would.
    
    So let me know if you would like to talk to a past student or parents
    of a child that is now 28 that attended the school years ago.....you
    might want to talk to parents that have children there currently, I
    don't know..............
    
    send mail, I haven't gotten in here much.........
    
    Kathy

    Your child's interests, abilities, and personalities play a big
    role, too.  Alternative schools are perfect for some kids, but not
    so good for others. 
    
    It didn't take us long to figure out that Kat doesn't deal well
    with unstructured or loosely structured environments.  She's
    organized and disciplined herself, and she gets frustrated when
    things around her are disorganized.  She likes knowing what she's
    supposed to do next.  She hates noise.  She has trouble
    concentrating when other people in the same room are doing
    something else.  
    
    I imagine she would have done all right in an open environment,
    but she flourished in a traditional structured environment.  
    
    --bonnie

    When were some of the hints coming about what kind of environment
    children wanted?  Is two too young?  It's fair to say that Daniela
    likes people interaction.  She also likes to strike out on her own. 
    As in walking down the street, away from the house.  
    
    What were the cues people used to determine structured vs.
    unstructured, as Bonnie mentioned?