Conference moira::parenting_v3

    
    I do know someone who has had much difficulty getting pregnant and she
    had an ectopic pregnancy about a year ago.  She did get pregnant again,
    this time not an ectopic pregnancy, but unfortunately lost the baby for
    other reasons early in the pregnancy.  The good news is that apparently
    her tubes are working as she was able to get pregnant again.
    
    Best of luck to you,  I can understand your concern.
    

    Please keep in mind when reading this reply, that this was MY
    experience only.  I'm writing not to scare you, but to give you hope
    for the future...
    
    My tubes were scarred and closed (like you) from having an IUD years
    ago.  Total time the IUD was used - only two months!  I didn't know
    this until I tried to become pregnant for the third time many years
    apart from my first two children.  After visiting a specialist and
    having the hysterosalpingogram, it was discovered that both were
    blocked.  I had reconstructive surgery, and was pregnant in six weeks. 
    This pregnancy ended in a miscarriage at ten weeks, though totally
    unrelated to the surgery; it was a blighted ovum, not a tubal
    pregnancy.  Without using any birth control I became pregnant five
    months later, and had a tubal pregnancy.  (Just prior to this I had the
    dye test again to see if both tubes were still patent (open), and
    learned that one tube had scarred closed again.  After losing the tubal
    pregnancy, my doctor managed to save the tube, but could not repair it
    then and there due to inflammation.  Three months later, I opted for
    total reconstructive surgery again.  (I'm a very determined person, and
    to this day wonder when I would have called it "quits" trying to having
    another child!)
    
    I conceived my son within a few weeks of the surgery!  (He's 2 1/2
    now.)  Last November, I had another tubal pregnancy that ruptured at 4
    weeks.  (I lost the tube that time.)  We never stopped trying to conceive
    because we wanted one more child, and with one tube left, it took us
    eleven months.  We're expecting in July!  
    
    To sum up, I was told that with the reconstructive surgery, there was
    only a 30% chance of ever becoming pregnant.  With that, I was told
    that I had a 10% higher chance of having a tubal pregnancy than that of
    a woman who had not had surgery.  After the first tubal pregnancy, I
    was told that I had an additional 10% higher likelihood of having a
    subsequent tubal (I guessed that increased my chances to 20%).  They
    way we looked at it, that still meant that we had an 80% possibility of
    NOT having another tubal!
    
    Bottom line is:  no one can decide what's best for you, but you!  I am
    so sorry for your loss.  If you would like to talk off-line, my DTN is
    341-6047.
    
    Know that you're not alone.  People care...

    Thank you both for sharing your experiences with me.  I also got
    another reply via VAXMail by someone who would rather stay
    anonomous.
    
    It sounds, depending on the extent of the scarring, as though I can 
    expect just about anything. 
    
    re: 684.2 / I too only had an IUD for a short time, 6 months.  All 
    those warnings just didn't prepare me for this.  
    
    I only have one tube patent (open).  Interestingly enough, this was 
    the tube I had the ectopic in.  The other tube is completely blocked.
    
    The doctor (a specialist at UMass) suggested I give it 6-12 mos.  If we
    don't concieve within that time frame, than I will have surgery to
    repair the blocked tube.
    
    It is comforting to hear other people talk of similiar experiences.
    And I very much appreciate the support and concern.
    
    Thanks again.
    Jayne
    
     
    
    
    

My sister-in-law has blocked tubes and other problems from a pelvic 
infection she had 15 years ago, when she was still in college.  

She's had at least two, and I think maybe three, tubal pregnancies,
and perhaps another miscarriage, not sure about that.  She's also 
had two successful pregnancies.  She had other complications during
both pregnancies that were related to the scarring from the infection
but not to the condition of her tubes.  

I'm not acquainted with the details of what she went through medically,
though I know she did have some experimental treatment using a balloon
to break the scarring -- I think that's now been approved as a regular 
medical technique.  The tubal pregnancies came shortly after that; after
the second she had the dye scan to make sure the tubes were still open,
and the dye itself apparently opened the tubes enough to let the next
pregnancy commence normally. 

Another relative (my brother's brother-in-law's wife's sister, if anyone
cares) had a tubal pregnancy and wound up in the hospital having
emergency surgery.  She had no previous problems with her tubes, it
was apparently just something that happens sometimes.  They have at 
least two kids now. 

Hope this helps.

--bonnie


 

    40 years ago my mother survived an ectopic and went on to have
    my younger sister 2 years later.
    
    BJ

    
    What are the symptoms of an Ectopic Pregnancy????
    How do you know???
    
    
    Chris
    (3+ weeks along, and having cramps)
    
    

    	My symptoms were a small amount of bleeding every day.  When
    I was seven weeks along, I began having steady pain in my stomach
    which at first lasted a half hour and gradually increased to lasting
    over two hours with the time inbetween the pains quickly decreasing.
    My stomach also felt really tender.
    	My doctor immediately sent me to the emergency room.

    With my first ectopic pregnancy, I felt throbbing pain on one side (not
    unlike the pain you get from ovulation, or the pain your ovary gives
    you in early pregnancy).  I also experienced shoulder pain (in the
    cavity between neck and shoulder).  At one point, I was in a meeting
    and my hands were shaking!
    
    The second ectopic pregnancy, I experienced a period that wouldn't
    quite end -- I kept getting slight brown spotting, sometimes turning
    red.  I would then lie down, and it would get better.  The symptom that
    I had for several days (but never mentioned to my doctor because it
    seemed silly) was what I had "gas" pains for several days.  As time
    went on the session of these "gas" pains would become more and more
    severe and last longer and longer.  I was popping rolaids, gas-x,
    anything and everything that I could get my hands on, but nothing would
    relieve the pain.  I was also experiencing the shoulder pain, and was
    certain that it was another tubal pregnancy -- the doctor kept telling
    me, however, that it was too early to spot it with ultrasound at this
    point.  When the pain became unbearable, my husband called the doctor
    back who said to meet him at the hospital immediately.  Within a couple
    of hours I was in the operating room -- my tube had ruptured.  As it
    turns out, the "gas pain" was from internal bleeding that was pooling
    behind my uterus, and the shoulder pain is one of the most common
    ectopic pregnancy symptoms.
    
    To answer your question more specifically, I never felt like I was
    having "cramps" like when you get your period.  For me, it was
    different.  At the beginning of my current pregnancy, I sometimes felt
    a bit crampy -- like I was about to start my period any minute -- but
    everything was fine!
    
    Your doctor can run a quantitative beta blood test to obtain 
    the exact HCG count, and monitor your count looking for this condition. 
    Some ultrasounds, too, can be performed very early in pregnancy to
    rule out ectopic, and try to locate the embryo in your uterus.
    
    My thoughts are with you.  Please let us know.
    
    Dale
    

    
    An update...
    
    I went to the OB yesterday and got checked out. He said something
    (I had a hard time understanding him - oriental) about it possibly
    being my ovarys stretching????  Or something to that effect. I had an
    internal exam and it wasn't very painful, and so far, no spotting or
    anything like that. So he's "pretty sure" I'm okay...but wants to do an 
    ultrasound next week to make sure it IS in my uterus. 
    
    My cramping has been kinda like .8's ...like I'm getting my period any
    minute. Just a low dull ache...with a sharp pain maybe twice a day.
    
    So...we shall see.  Its probably just me, over-worrying as usual...but
    I'll feel better when I know for sure.  This is my "first", so its all
    new to me.
      
    Chris
    

	re: .9  

	This is a little off the subject, but what the hey?  I would make SURE 
that I could understand my OB.  If you don't understand, ask him him to repeat
what he said.  If you feel uncomfortable asking him to repeat what he says, go
to another OB.   

	(A few years back I was taking my cats to a vet who while very good
technically, had such a strong country/southern accent that I was constanly 
asking him to repeat.  One of my cats had a chronic condition and I got so 
tired of asking him to repeat (I swear that the Dr. thought I was either deaf 
or stupid by then :-) ) that I switched vets.  It was one of the best decisions
I've made in my adult life.  The difference in my comfort level and under-
standing of the treatment was dramatic.  And as a result, my cat got better 
much faster even though the treatment was the largely the same.  I just better 
understood what I was supoosed to be doing. ) 

Tracey

    
    This is kind of off the subject, Chris, but I think it's worth
    saying anyways....I found during my pregnancies (one hit, one miss)
    that it is very important to have a good relationship with your
    ob/gyn....to be able to *talk* to him/her.  If you have a hard time
    understanding your doctor, you might consider switching or listening
    harder :-).   Just my opinion,   Carol

    
    Re .10 and .11
    
    Thanks...and I know what you mean. He had explained it once in the 
    examining room...and I reaslised I didn't understand. Then when we 
    went ot his office...I asked again...Saying "I'm sorry, but I didn't
    understand what you meant..."...and he told me again...but as hard as
    I lisened, I still wasn't really SURE I was geting the gist.  So, I
    didn't ask a 3rd time so not to look stupid.   
    
    But I do AGREE with you both whole-heartedly. I have decided to go for
    the ultrasound next week....and then I was suppose to go back in 3
    weeks to see him again. But I've decided to check out someone else
    instead of go for that visit (probably the visit they take allt he
    blood samples etc). I was referred to this dr (I saw yesterday) by a
    friend...and I'm sure he his probably a great doctor etc..But I feel/and
    have been told that I should really be comfortable with the OB...and I
    just don't think I could be comfortable not being able to understand
    everything he says.  Also...I was very suprised, being my first
    pregnancy, that he didn't tell me much. About diet, do's and don'ts
    etc...    Do they just assume that you KNOW all these things? 
    
    I guess this is getting off the topic, but thanks for the opinions
    I appreciate all the advice I can get.  
    
    Regards,
    Chris
    
      

    re: understanding your doctor
    
    Another thing you can do to help understanding is to ask the
    doctor to write it down.  I know, some doctors have worse
    handwriting than they do speech habits, but depending on you and
    the doctor it might work -- this is how my aunt, who is hard of
    hearing, makes sure she gets the dosages and such right when she
    visits the doctor.  
    
    Try repeating back what you think the doctor said.  This will also
    help when you clearly heard all the words and discover they didn't
    make any sense to you.  "You mean the frizzbuzz is really growing
    out of the side of my ear????"
    
    You can also ask the doctor to show you the body parts -- most OBs
    have a plastic model of the internal organs perched around the
    room somewhere.  Asking the doctor to explain this to you can be
    very educational even when you DO understand.
    
    And you can ask the nurse for clarification, elaboration, and so
    on.  Often they know more about nutrition, rest, and stuff like
    that than the doctor does. 
    
    --bonnie

    Back on understanding the doctor, I like the suggestion of having
    him/her write it down. I just went through a similar situation.
    I brought my daughter in to the ped's and she was diagnosed with
    a perforated eardrum. Then when I repeated this to my husband and
    the sitter, they said, "are you sure, that doesn't sound right
    because..."
    
    I guess my point is I felt I fully understood in the Doc's office
    but started to doubt my understanding when others asked questions.

    I have recently recovered (almost) from my second ectopic pregnancy (no
    children yet - sigh).  Both were diagnosed very early on (about four
    weeks from conception) so that the tube did not have to be removed.  As
    things look pretty good in my left tube, I will start back on clomid
    and pray for a normal pregnancy next time!  If it happens a third time
    other options will have to be considered.
    
    However, don't be put off by my experience of multiple ectopics - there
    is always a risk, but you have much higher chance of having a normal
    pregnancy.  The chapter of RESOLVE in your area would put you in touch
    with RESOLVE members who have had ectopics, and you would find that
    many of them have gone on to have children.  I spoke to a lovely woman
    from RESOLVE who had multiple ectopics and was very encouraged to hear
    the sounds of an infant crying in the background at the end of our
    conversation.
    
    When you try again, I would insist on a sonogram as soon as possible
    after you know you are pregnant.  My second ectopic was discovered that
    way.  The early you are diagnosed the greater the likelihood of
    preserving the tube.
    
    I wish you luck.  If you would like to talk to someone who has been
    through a similar experience, my DTN is 427-5073.
    
    Cathryn