Conference moira::parenting_v3

"The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" talks about alternatives for when you want 
to help your child wean sooner than they might on their own.

1.800.LALECHE, if not in your local bookstore.

=ss

Cut out one of the feeds at a time, and that will give you a better idea
as to whether she'll need a replacement comforter.  Probably the morning
will be easiest to give up first.  Sometimes a routine is all they really
need for comfort ... for our last daughter, it was ensuring that everybody
(her stuffed toys ... like Bert and Ernie and bear) were all there on the
bed and that she was tucked in.

It was when she got to 2 that she took a comforter ... a blanket that gets
dragged all over the place now!

Good luck,

Stuart

    Are you sure that your baby really needs a comforter of some kind?
    I assumed our daughter Sarah needed a comfort object, especially
    as she was being weaned at around six or seven months, so
    I always made sure to cover her with her favorite blanket
    and made a big deal of putting her favorite cuddly toys in bed
    with her. I think she appreciated them, but it slowly dawned
    on me that it was *me* insisting she have them, not her insisting
    she wanted them. [Maybe I needed the comfort of knowing she
    was comfortable? :-)] Sure enough, she can go to sleep just as
    easily with or without her favorite objects surrounding her.
    We'll see if this changes as she gets closer to age two
    (as the previous noter mentioned.)
    
    -Barbara                          

Kathryne never got attached to any object/blanket/animal in 
particular, so your child might not need a substitute.  

    I agree - I think it is the parents who think their child "needs" a
    comfort thing.  Niether of my kids have needed one, though my daughter
    will go and get a blanket when she is very tired and cranky.  I found
    that if I didn't ask them if they wanted to take "blanky" that they
    didn't miss it at all.  It gets to be the parent's habit to ask!
    

 
 .5 > I think it is the parents who think their child "needs" a comfort thing.  
 
 While some kids don't care about comfort objects, others very much do,
 regardless of their parents' feelings.  Kids differ on this dimension, as on
 most others.
 
 		- Bruce
 
 

    Some kids that don't appear to need the "comfort objects" in the
    beginning, eventually do want something.  My middle son didn't want
    anything until my mother gave him a stuffed dog.  Now he changes which
    animal it is, but usually wants one at bedtime.
    
    As for the original question, I weaned mine from one feeding at a time,
    the last one was the night-time feeding.  I don't remember them needing
    anything to replace the "comfort" of the feeding, but I still rock the
    baby (who is now 13 months) for a few minutes in the dark bedroom
    before putting him to bed - he is not asleep, just "slowed down" and
    ready.  He is so conditioned to this that when I come downstairs to get
    him after putting the older two to bed, he runs to dad and cries, stays
    "crying" until we get to the top of the stairs.  When we get into his
    room he immediately puts his head on my shoulder and cuddles in.  In
    five minutes he is ready for bed, and we are both "comforted" at the
    end of the day.  I'm not sure who needs this more...me or him....
    
    
    -Laura

    I think my 13 month old son David has taken the comfort object to
    extremes lately.  I bought him a stuffed cow for Christmas that is
    musical.  We used to rock and sing before bed, then when he slowed down
    I'd put him into the crib and he'd nod off.  Now, he can't WAIT to get
    into that crib and snuggle in with his musical cow!  I tried rocking
    and singing last night, and he sat bolt upright, pointed to his crib
    and whined.  I lay him down, pulled the cow to activate the music, and
    off he went.  Mind you, this USED to be the ONLY time during the day
    he'd permit cuddling...sigh : (
    
    Sarah
    

    Kat at 17 *still* uses her cuddle blanket -- a lightweight quilted
    coverlet -- when she's feeling sick or lonely . . . it's in
    tatters and sheds filling all over the living room, but that
    doesn't matter to her.
    
    Steven had a blanket and a favorite stuffed animal.  He now cycles
    through animals but generally has to have one with him in
    stressful or frightening situations.  He finds it especially
    comforting to borrow Kat's or my stuffed animals.
    
    David so far (15+ months) hasn't shown any interest in any comfort
    objects.  Interestingly, he's by far the most clinging and cuddly
    of our three.  I guess he gets it from us, rather than from the
    things around him.
    
    --bonnie

    re .8
    Sarah,
    
    Watch for him to change though!!  Christopher would NEVER let us cuddle
    with him, but somewhere around 3-4 he COMPLETELY changed his mind and
    he loves to cuddle now whenever he can.  Took us by surprise.  He's
    5 1/2 now, and gets more cuddly every day.
    
    BTW - Christopher has and always has had a 'blanky' (though I probably
    wanted him to have it more than he needed it), and Jason has his blanky
    that he will NEVER part with (washing is interesting (-:), and almost
    always has a stuffed animal to go with it, but the animal changes.

    re:  .7
    
    I like the approach that you used in weaning your child and have been
    working to cut out the morning feeding.  At what age did you cut out 
    the evening feeding?
    
    Thanks.