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Conference moira::parenting

Title:Parenting
Notice:Previous PARENTING version at MOIRA::PARENTING_V3
Moderator:GEMEVN::FAIMANY
Created:Thu Apr 09 1992
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1292
Total number of notes:34837

1180.0. "Child Support Problem" by SCAMP::PENNELLA () Thu Aug 29 1996 11:44

    Can any of you fellow parents help out with the legal issue?  I am the
    mother of a 13yr old daughter and have pretty much raised her on my
    own.  After her father and I divorced he was set to pay a certain
    amount in child support which he did for about 1 year until he was
    fired from that well paying job.  It's been down hill for him ever
    since (his own fault).  To make a really long story short I have been
    letting him pay half of what he's required to pay and he has bounced
    ALOT of checks followed by apology after apology.  Now it's starting
    again.  I sent him a letter 5 months ago that I was going to get his
    wages attached if he wasn't more responsible.  It hasn't worked... he
    just bounced another which messed up my account!!!  I'm so mad I could
    spit!  I guess I could call an attorney, but My God their so expensive
    the cost would hurt.  I don't qualify for pro-bono because I make too
    much (catch 22, huh?).  Should I call the district attorneys office? 
    Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.  I want his wages attached so I
    don't have to go through this anymore.  I probably should have done it
    years ago!
    
    Thanks,
    Terri
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1180.1HAZMAT::WEIERPatty, DTN 381-0877Thu Aug 29 1996 12:5142
Terri,

If you have a court-ordered child support agreement, and he is failing to meet 
in, then he is in contempt of court.  You don't need an attorney.  Usually the 
clerk at your local courthouse (actually, I think you'd have to go to the 
court in which the order was filed) can help you file the papers that you 
need, for a hearing.

Realize, that since you've been allowing him to pay less, he can use that as a 
precedent, and your support amount might actually be less than what is 
currently ordered -- it depends on how much/hard he fights it.

If you're in NH, then it's all different, and there's no squabbling about it.
As a general rule, it pretty much works out to about 1/4 of his salary, for 1 
child.  (1/3 for 2 children) The formulas they use are more complex than that,
but that's about how it works out. 

In NH, you would each need to fill out a Support Afidavit worksheet, which is 
presented to the courts.  They go over the figures, and plug them into the "NH 
Child Support Formula", and they come up with an amount.  And it doesn't 
usually differ much from this amount.  This can be re-adjusted every 3 years, 
or if circumstances change dramatically (someone loses a job).

Technically, when he lost his original job, HE should have taken it back to 
court to have the child-support amount adjusted.  By being the "nice gal" you 
sort of left yourself open to receiving less as ordered by courts, but it's 
still not hopeless.

You'll want to bring evidence that he's consistently not reliable with his 
payments, for them to attach wages.  For 1 bounced check in 6 mos you might 
have a hard time.  As for it messing up your account - that's your 'fault'.  
It's not legal to write checks for money you don't have.  You technically 
didn't have his money, UNTIL his check cleared.  The court might not be very 
sympathetic on that front, but I'd try it anyway.  

If they won't attach wages, a lot of people have support paid through a local 
"welfare" type office (may not be welfare, maybe social services??), and in 
theory, they are supposed to harrass him if he doesn't pay.  I don't have any 
more information about that process.

Good Luck!
Patty
1180.2CSLALL::JACQUES_CACrazy ways are evidentThu Aug 29 1996 13:498
    If the support was not court appointed to start with, you are in
    even deeper.  You have to file for support.  He is not responsible
    for paying you anything legally, and until you file, he could stop
    and not be responsible for the time he misses.   
    
    You are not able to get his pay attached as your first step.
    
    						cj *->
1180.3SHRCTR::PGILLThu Aug 29 1996 14:2513
    
    The base note stated he was ordered at the time of the divorce to pay 
    X amount of support.  
    
    I ran into a problem with my ex paying on time,
    etc.  I went to the courthouse where I got the divorce, filled out two
    forms and within two weeks started getting checks from his employer.  I
    did have my lawyer with me, but he didn't really do anything.  I just
    filled the forms and signed.
    
    Definately worth a call to the courthouse.
    
    
1180.4Check your divorce papers, maybe it was covered...MROA::DUPUISThu Aug 29 1996 14:444
    My divorce degree states in it that if my x defaults, his wages will be
    attached.  
    
    Roberta
1180.5hairsplitting dept.MPGS::WOOLNERYour dinner is in the supermarketThu Aug 29 1996 15:3512
    .0> ...he was set to pay
    
    does not equal
    
    .3> he was ordered at the time of the divorce to pay
    
    
    Being "set to pay" can mean financially in a position to pay, or even 
    *willing* to pay, but it doesn't imply a mandate from anyone at all. 
    Basenoter, was it stipulated in the divorce?
    
    Leslie
1180.6all in writing...SCAMP::PENNELLAThu Aug 29 1996 16:213
    Yes, it's stipulated in the divorce papers.  
    
    -Terri
1180.7what bounced check?SCAMP::PENNELLAThu Aug 29 1996 16:258
    ... oh one more thing regarding 
    
    <.1
    "I" didn't bounce checks... he did.  "It" messed up my account because
    the money wasnt in my account when I went to access it.  Please do not
    assume I go around writing bad checks!
    
    -Terri
1180.8Doesn't seem *fair*, but...MPGS::WOOLNERYour dinner is in the supermarketThu Aug 29 1996 17:259
    He burned you, but Patty is correct that the check you wrote on
    an *assumed* bank balance is technically your "fault."  It's the
    account holder's responsibility to know his/her bank balance and be
    *sure* it's sufficient for the check(s) s/he's writing.
    
    Maybe you can get future payments (either from him or wage garnishing)
    paid to you in bank checks (certified checks/money orders)?
    
    Leslie
1180.9You don't get it?SCAMP::PENNELLAThu Aug 29 1996 17:298
    Leslie and Patty,
    *** I did not write check(s) that bounced.. I thought I just said it
    on the previous memo???  If your REREAD my note is said "he bounced
    a check which messed up my account"  That does not mean "I" bounced
    anything... the money was not there when I called the DCU!!  That's all
    I'm just asking for legal info... not financial!
    
    Terri
1180.10read for comprehension folksSCAMP::MINICHINOThu Aug 29 1996 17:2912
    I think the noter said that she "didn't write checks against" a
    insufficient account....Maybe you guys should read for comprehension...
    
    now the point in fact is this....he's not paying his support...can
    someone help the base noter with a logical and non judgemental
    resolution.....
    
    
    again......the noter said that she DID NOT WRTIE AGAINST THIS
    CHECK****HELLO, he's done it before...
    
    
1180.11CSC32::M_EVANSwatch this spaceThu Aug 29 1996 17:475
    The DA's office in CO has a child support enforcement unit.  i don't
    know about your state.  I have found that if you are not on state aid,
    you are put on a lower priority, but they can help you out.
    
    meg
1180.12BIGQ::MARCHANDFri Aug 30 1996 08:4622
    
       I understand what she's saying how 'his' bounced check messing her
    up. I was in a situation where someone wrote me out a $300 and it
    'bounced', DCU deposited into my account twice and then finally mailed
    it to me and 'substracted' another $15 from my account. I asked the 
    person in question for $315 in cash after that. This took about two
    weeks to get. IF the person had honored the check, I wouldn't have to
    have gone through the BULL and FRUSTRATION of seeing the money added, 
    then subtracted, then added, then subrated and finally charged me
    $15! This if frustrating and they shouldn't have done this in the first
    place, that was truelly their fault. I didn't PLAN on what to do
    with the money until after I got it, but it was still frustrating to
    go through it. 
    
        When others WRONG US, we have a right to feel anger and
    frustration, and there's nothing wrong with having these healthy
    emotions. I know I didn't do anything wrong by asking for the money
    in cash, PLUS the $15 the DCU charged my account for what THEY did to
    me. 
    
       Just my 2 cents
         Rosie
1180.13I should've engaged brain B4 operating keyboardMPGS::WOOLNERYour dinner is in the supermarketFri Aug 30 1996 10:054
    My apologies.  I forgot about banks assessing processing charges for an
    incoming rubber check (which really is IMO punishing the innocent!).
    
    Leslie
1180.14Where are you located.....MROA::DUPUISFri Aug 30 1996 10:384
    Terri--what state are you in....I think in Mass you can notify the
    department of revenue to have his wages attached.
    
    Roberta
1180.15MROA::SPICERFri Aug 30 1996 15:2530
    Terri,
    
    You do not have to go to court or hire a lawyer in MA (I'm not sure
    if NH is the same). If you have an order, call the Dept. of Revenue 
    Child Support Enforcement. 
    
    You have to prove that there is an order, it helps if you have some
    evidence of non payment but it's not vital (proving what hasn't
    happened isn't easy) and they will then open a case on your behalf.
    
    Typically they will contact your ex, work out a repayment schedule for
    what he has not paid, add that to the ordered payments and attach his
    pay. 
    
    Frankly, his allowing it to get to this stage is about as stupid as you
    can get. HE should have been in court having the amount adjusted as
    soon as he was fired. I guess the question you have to ask yourself is,
    given what he earns, is he paying a reasonable (to guidelines) amount ? 
    i.e. would a court order him to pay more or less than what you are 
    actually getting ? 
    
    You should expect that the minute he hears from the DOR he will get the 
    amount changed to reflect his current income.
                                                                       
    Martin
    
    
    
      
    
1180.16HAZMAT::WEIERPatty, DTN 381-0877Mon Sep 09 1996 11:4313
Terri,

Sorry for misunderstanding .... I guess when I say it "messed up my account"
it means to me, that the balance dipped into the negative numbers.  Ooops!

It would definitely help if we knew what state you are in.  Also, you may find
a bunch of information (flip side, but still good info) in
NON_CUSTODIAL_PARENTS .... but be a little careful asking questions - they can 
be a fiesty bunch! (-; 

-Apologies again ...

Patty