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Conference moira::parenting

Title:Parenting
Notice:Previous PARENTING version at MOIRA::PARENTING_V3
Moderator:GEMEVN::FAIMANY
Created:Thu Apr 09 1992
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1292
Total number of notes:34837

1138.0. "Hates getting dressed!" by MROA::CIUFFETTI () Fri May 10 1996 13:23

    Getting dressed with my son is becoming a major chore.  He screams the
    minute he feels the tee shirt touch his head, or arms, and doesn't stop
    screaming until I pick him up fully dressed.  He's 6 months old, and
    this has been going on for a while now...maybe 3 months.  Sometime's 
    he's better than other times.  We are trying different approaches like,
    dressing him elsewhere than the dressing table (our bed), keeping him
    occupied, distracting him, toys galore, singing, you name it.  I've
    just recently begun trying to reason with him, talking low and trying
    to get his attention.  Although I'm no expert on kids (this is my
    first), does anyone else out there have an alternate suggestion on
    how to handle this?  I appreciate it.........Dale
    
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1138.1Maybe a different type of clothingBASEX::WERNETTEFri May 10 1996 14:047
    Could it be the type of clothes you dress him in?  You mentioned
    putting a t-shirt over his head.  Perhaps a onesie that snaps up
    the front or a shirt with buttons half way down the front would
    help.  Maybe he doesn't like things pulled over his head.
    
    Good luck,
    Terry
1138.2BOBSBX::PENDAKpicture packin' mommaFri May 10 1996 14:2212
    Aaron has kind of a large head (he gets it from his father) and for a
    long time he hated having things put on over his head.  The way we
    handled it was to put on things that had buttons (like a polo) or a
    large head opening (a onsie that's one size larger than he actually
    needed).  I don't remember when he finally got over hating having it
    put over his head to a point where he helped.  I know it was before he
    turned a year, probably around 8 or 10 months.
    
    I second the suggestion, try something that has a larger opening if
    it's a pull on or something that button's up front.
    
    sandy
1138.3same hereUSOPS::CASEYSun May 12 1996 13:4710
    
    Must be the age, Bridget is 8 months old now and she hates anything
    pulled over her head.  I try to use the snap front onesies as much as
    possible or else we go one size larger and I avoid clothes that have
    a small head opening.  She also has a big head (which she gets from
    her father).  This has been going on for quite a few months, I just
    try to get it over with as quick as possible.
    
    Kathy
    
1138.4CSLALL::JACQUES_CATrust me, I'm a ratMon May 13 1996 09:479
    How well do I remember this!  It would sound like I was beating
    Angeline every time I dressed her.  Now, at 20 mths, she still
    hates getting dressed.  She'll start snuggling and cuddling with
    me to stall it.  Usually after I put on her onsie and shirt she'll
    look at me and say "all done?"  a couple of times.  "No, we still
    have the bottom half"., so then she just hugs me some more.
    
    Plays me like a fiddle, that kid.  :-)
    							cj *->
1138.5BOONETCAD::FERGUSONMon May 13 1996 11:529
    We turn getting dressed into a peek-a-boo game, since Lindsay
    was about six months old.
    I ask "ready to play boo?", she nods, we pull the shirt on 
    S L O W L Y, while I say "Where's Lindsay?", and as her head
    peeks out I say "BOO", as she's starting to learn to speak
    sometimes she says "BOO".  We have a blast getting her dressed.
    She's 16 months now.
    
    Janice
1138.6Try Ignoring HimMROA::LEMIREMon May 13 1996 18:0824
    This will take a while to kick in, but you can try ignoring him
    if he persists in crying or resisting after trying to distract
    him with 1 or 2 toys (at the most) or singing.  Don't look at
    him, don't say anything, just get the job done as quickly as
    possible.  When he realizes he isn't getting any response from
    you from his crying, he'll stop doing it.  This is based on the
    theory that his crying is just a mechanism to get a response from you.  
    This is also advice for children who don't like the diapering process.
    
    A key point is if he stops crying, start talking or singing to him
    again.  This reinforces his cooperation.  Ignore again if he starts
    crying again.
    
    By the way, I agree with the notes about trying to use as large as
    possible openings, and playing "peek a boo" or "where's (child's
    name's) fingers/toes?"
    
    But if Faye (13 months) can't be distracted or calmed off the bat, I 
    revert to ignoring her.  She stops her crying pretty quickly now, and 
    often it doesn't even start anymore.  She's happier, and I am, too!
    
    Come see me if you want to talk some more!  
    
    Jennie
1138.7Thanks!MROA::CIUFFETTITue May 14 1996 13:418
    Thanks for responses all.  I definitely have tried the larger clothing
    idea, snap front onsies, etc.  I was looking for ways of dealing with
    the negative reactions, rather than ways of trying to prevent it, ie
    larger clothing, since preventing it is not an option anymore.
    I like the peekaboo idea, I've been using that to keep him occupied, 
    but never thought of incorporating it into the dressing process.  I also 
    like the idea of ignoring the negative behavior.  I'll try those two 
    approaches, and let's see how it goes.