Conference moira::parenting

    One of my friends gave me an exersaucer for a gift. Natasha loves it.
    Sometimes bigger things are more helpful than alot of little things.
    Strollers, highchairs and carseats are also good. Have fun shopping.
    
     

    A couple things given to be that I have since given to others:
    
    . Multipack rolls of film
    
    . A couple of packages of baby gift Thank-you notes, and 
      accompanying stamps
    
    . Socks!  I never had enough baby socks, onesies, or newborn
      sleepers.  Everyone has the feeling that "oh they grow right
      out of the newborns"  and bought me all 3-6 month items.  I
      had to go buy a bunch of things to get her through the first
      couple of months
    
    						cj *->

    There's always a Moses basket (handy for letting baby sleep in if there
    isn't a crib or bassinett available) put in a pretty blanket or quilt,
    add other things like sleeper, receiving blankets, film (great idea!),
    blank video tapes for a camcorder, IOU's for babysitting services and
    gift certificate to a local (10 minute drive or less for the first time
    out away from the little guy!) restaurant...
    
    sandy                              

    Also, along the film idea, if you know the shop/service they
    frequent for developing, gift certificates.
    
    					cj *->

    
    I always thought that gifts for an older child were a great idea.
    At a baby shower, you get tons of stuff you'll need for the first
    6 months or so, but what about later on in the babys first year?
    
    Some ideas along that line:
    
    - childrens dish set(s), fork and spoon and some sippy cups
      (I highly recommend Playtex spillproof AND LEAKPROOF sippy cups, 
       $3 each so a bit expensive but great).
    - kiddie pottie and kiddie underpants (if you can find generic or know 
      the sex) and books on pottie training (childrens books, not adult)
    - gates for the door and other safety gadgets like cabinet clips
      and outlet covers
    - developmental toys suitable for a child 6 months plus (forget
      the rattles and teething rings and stuffed animals!).
    - a set of childrens books
    
    Karen
    
    
         

    or even.. for when the child is much older.  If I buy an outfit for a
    friend who's just had a baby, I usually buy something in 18-24 months.
    
    Holly
    
    p.s.  I LOVE the idea of the film!
    

I often give the Penelope Leach book "Your Baby and Child" (?)
which covers from birth to age 5.  Hasn't been duplicated
yet!  (And it appears to have been appreciated!! :-)

- Deb B.

    
    Here's a list of some of the things I received at my shower
    and love:
    
    - "Bouncy Seat".  I feed the baby in it because he's still
       too small for the high chair.  I sit him in it when I'm
       doing things around the house (on the kitchen table when
       I'm cooking, or on the floor with his activity gym* while
       I'm getting ready in the morning).  It's great.
    
    - Activity gym.  He started playing with this at about 6
      weeks old and still loves it.  Excellent for developing
      hand and eye coordination.
    
    - A case of pampers and baby wipes...
    
    - Is she a walker/runner?  Get her one of those "sport strollers".
      Light weight, easy to travel with.
    
    - You can never have enough onesies, Carter's sleepers (love them).
      Get them in the bigger sizes.
    
    - A BIG photo album.  I didn't get one and wished I had...
    
    - Sounds like this is going to be a fall/winter baby?  How about
      a little snow suit?
    
    Just a few ideas...
    
    Kristin
    
    P.S.  I love the film idea!!!
    - 

    Something I always liked to do at a baby shower was to make sure I got
    and item that would make the "Mom" feel special.  A pretty nightgown
    for the first night home, special lotions or bath oils and a great
    trashy novel to get your mind of baby for just a moment out of the day.
    
    I also agree with the Baby and Young Child book as it has descriptions
    of illnesses in the back and I use it as a great reference bible.
    
    My other suggestion is a book called "Meditations for new Mothers".  It
    was a sanity saving book.  I tended to appreciate it philosophical
    notations later in the first year when sleep deprivation and short
    tempers set in.

    Another vote for film....that's my new gift. Hallmark is always having
    photo albums on sale. Great if you can find purse/pocket size brag
    books. Also we love the 3 volume cases of photo albums.
    
    Also, another favorite to give and very well received:
       Lullabye tapes - makes nice package with soft squishy animal or a quilt
       and/or lamp
    
    

    
    Along with the film/photo album, a journal and scrapbook.  If she
    doesn't have a point and shoot camera, perhaps that would be nice.  I
    have a camcorder and good Pentax but the camera I use most on Alex and 
    always leave ready and loaded is a point and shoot.  If you went with the
    lullabye tapes, a portable tape recorder (or kids portable for when the
    baby is older) if she doesn't have one.   I would have loved a jogger.
    My family and very close friends gave us most of the big staples which
    to us made them more a part of the experience.  One of my sister's bought 
    a child's unfinished wooden aderondack chair and painted it.  She gave it
    to us at the shower and we both flipped over it.  Now Alex really loves it.
    How about a painting or nice picture for the baby's room.  Thinking
    back I really loved that basket of miscellaneous things.  A lot of the
    stuff I hadn't thought of - like the pacefier and holder than snaps to
    clothing, baby clippers, nose suckers, and instead of rectal
    thermometer an ear thermometer, portable wipes holder (though I use a 
    ziplock bag now).
    
    Kathy  
    
      

    
    I agree with the idea of the ear thermometer.  That is something
    that is great to have.  Also, a diaper genie and a pack-n-play
    portable crib are great.
    
    ......................beth

    There are certainly a lot of good suggestions here!  
    
    One present that I got that was cute, and I have since duplicated is
    the baby tub and all the fixings.  It included:
    
    two hooded towel and washcloth sets
    Bath oil, lotion, powder, etc. (I only used the soap of this
        stuff...per my pediatrician)
    Rubber ducky
    
    It was very cute.  You can fill the tub, and then wrap it with the
    clear stuff that basket places use to shrink wrap a basket.  Use the
    duck for the bow and you're all set.
    
    (To wrap it in this way, you need to create an airtight seal of the
    celophane and then use a hairdryer to shrink it to the tub.  Try to
    make the initial seal as tight as possible, cause this works best.)
    
    judy

    Here's another request.  My sister is married to a commanding officer
    of a Marine squadron.  It is customary that they give a baby gift to
    each baby.
    
    The previous gifts that have been given were a spoon with the squadron
    number engraved on it and a bib with the number embroidered on it.
    
    Got any ideas about what they can give?  They'll only need a dozen or
    so a year for the next couple of years.  To add to the complexity, they
    are in Japan so I need to find the item here and ship it.  She doesn't
    want to spend a fortune buying it, and I don't want to spend a fortune
    shipping it.
    
    Thanks!
    
    judy

    If you're going with film and a photo album, may I suggest buying the
    archival quality pages for the film.  I would have really appreciated
    that as a gift.
    
    I second the activity gym, when we changed Aaron in the early months we
    would put the activity gym over him to keep him occupied.  He still
    likes it (at almost 7 months).  And the bouncy chair is great!  We
    would put Aaron in the bouncy chair on the table while we ate dinner
    and he would snooze or we'd have a nice "conversation" with him.  The
    ear thermometer is great, but also maybe a pacifier thermometer because
    the ear thermometer may not work very well for a little baby.
    
    Other things would be disney video tapes that will be unavailable when
    the little person is old enough to appreciate (I hate that!).
    
    sandy

You could get her a car seat or a high chair, or a stroller.

Lori

    
    Thanks so much for all these great ideas!!! I can't wait to go
    shopping!!
    
    Patty

    A few ideas, of things that I used the most when my daughter was first
    born.
    
    First, there is a gadget at Toys 'R Us, about $35, that holds 2 small
    bottles AND has a side attachment for heating.  If your friend lives in
    a 2-story house, most likely she has to go up and down the stairs every
    time she needs to heat a bottle (unless she's breast feeding) at night.
    
    This device holds 2 bottles, and with an ice pack keeps them cold for
    up to 12 hours.  You keep the device in the baby's bedroom, and when
    they wake up for their late night feedings, you simply take out the
    bottle and heat it in the attachment ... bottle is ready before you've
    even had time to change the baby's diaper!  No more trips up and down
    the stairs during the night.   
    
    The second gadget that we swore by was the swingy chair.  We liked the
    one that was battery operated (hand cranking is a pain), and the one
    that DIDN'T have the bar across the top, so that you didn't smack
    baby's head when you put them in.  It was expensive (about $80 on
    sale), but it really worked well in keeping the baby calm/quiet, they
    really like the motion.  I think my daughter used it until she was
    10-11 months old.  
    
    Also, I always liked those little one-piece sleepers ... you can get
    a package of 3 for about $10 ... never have enough of those.  Or the
    little individual jars (3 oz or 6 oz) of formula (again, if she's not 
    breast feeding).  They really come in handy if you run out for errands 
    with the baby, and don't want to bring a chilled bottle.  Pop the top
    of the jar bottle, attach a nipple, and you're ready to roll.

    For the Baby gift to Japan, what about a decorated T-Shirt or Onsie
    with the sqadron # and an airplane on it.  Its light weight for
    shipping and a lot of craft-wise people can decorate them beatifully. 
    I have a little T-Shirt that my daughter wore and now she uses it for
    dollies and stuffed animals.

    This is a great idea!  I got one from the hospital that
    I'm keeping for my son, so I should have thought of this 
    myself...
    
    Of course, I'll accept other ideas too!
    
    judy

    Maybe a picture frame with the squadron name/number on it?  They
    might be a little heavy to ship, but I think they'd be nice gifts.
    
    Teddy bears (again, with the squadron name/number) might be cute,
    too.  
    
    I don't know how many people are in a squadron, but some places will
    give discounts if you buy 20 or more items.  This would be one way to
    save a little $$$.
    
    ****
    
    Regarding the baby shower gifts: Crib sheets and receiving blankets are
    always welcome.  Waterproof mattress pads for the crib are wonderful.
    Magazine/newspaper subscriptions for the mother.  Something (wrapped
    in non-baby shower gift wrap!) for the older child, such as a 
    suitable video (Sesame Street and Disney are terrific, my kids have
    been enjoying them since they were 6 months old!), paint-with-water
    books, etc.  Something small, but very much theirs.
    
    The shower gifts I welcomed most were the things I could use, like
    sleepers in larger (18 month) sizes, crib sheets, hooded bath towels,
    receiving blankets, the stroller, the walker, the high chair, the
    toys that were safe for the baby to mouth and chew (they start doing
    that sooner than you think!!).  A port-a-crib is a Godsend; a baby
    monitor is especially helpful if you have a two-story house.  Maybe 2
    or 3 people could chip in and pay for 1 or 2 months of diaper service.
    
    Biggest gift of all:  About a month to 6 weeks after the baby is born,
    call the new mother and offer to babysit.  It's nice if the parents can
    go out to dinner by themselves (especially if it's their second
    child!), or perhaps the mother needs time to herself.  Be creative, and
    remember, shower gifts aren't necessarily "things."
    

    
    Again, thanks for all the great ideas!!! I think I'm going to go with
    a large item (Exer-saucer, ear thermometer) and then maybe some small
    things in a small diaper bag. I remember having to go out and buy a
    small one for those short trips when you don't need a bunch of stuff.
    
    Again, thanks. If I see anything new or interesting at the party I'll
    put the info here.
    
    Patty

    I wonder how many of us are carrying the small diaper bag we recieved
    from Nashua Memorial (yes it has a different name now...) when we had our
    little bundles of joy.  You might want to make sure the hospital
    doesn't give the new mom one.  It really is a cute little pastel peter
    rabbit diaper bag and came with 6 bottles of one of the formulas (which
    I gave to the local soup kitchen).
    
    If you give the ear thermometer, you might want to include refills of
    the plastic thingies (I admit, I've hit a blank!) that you only use
    once (unless you want to get out the alcohol to clean it).  You can go
    through the original 20 pretty quick learning how to use it.  And
    watch for a good sale, I think my sister-in-law paid full price (from
    an exclusive catalog, what I could do with that extra $30, just think
    of all the sleepers I could buy!).  And if you want to buy a *big*
    ticket item, I would have loved for someone to buy one of the Fisher
    Price gyms that go outside or in a large in door room.  The ones that
    have slides and places to crawl through.  It's on our list of 
    Christmas presents for Aaron.
    
    For little items, if she's planning to use a bottle at some time, you
    might get her different nipples.  Yes really!  We bought the Johnson &
    Johnson bottles for Aaron (even though I was planning to breastfeed
    him, I knew he'd have to take the bottle when I returned to work) and
    he absolutely HATED the silicon nipples on them.  Fortunately I had
    another nipple in a basket someone had given me that he liked, so I
    could try that and found out that it was the nipple he rejected, not
    the bottle itself.  Another idea is to find out what kind of pacifier
    the hospital gives the baby (if the mom doesn't object to the baby
    having pacifiers).  The hospital we went to gave hima Mini Mam and we
    had bought some Nuk.  Well, Aaron hated the nuk so we bought a few more
    Mam's (at 6 plus months, Aaron very seldom uses his pacifier, only
    if he's extremely stressed or at bedtime). 
    
    If you're buying bib's for the baby, I hated the tie bibs.  You have
    this small creature with a very wobbly neck that your trying to tie
    something around it's neck, you're not happy, he/she's not happy... If
    the mom plans to use a bib on the little person while he/she's so
    small, the best (in MY opinion) is velcro, second is snap.  I like the
    velcro because it's so easy, I like the snap because as the baby get's
    bigger, the velcro may not attach as well and may irritate the little
    ones neck.
    
    I have bunches of suggestions and oppinions, I'll just leave it for
    now!
    
    sandy

    
    If you artistically inclined and the baby's room has not
    yet been completed, you could offer to stencil! I did
    a Peter Rabbit motif for my sister, and then outfitted 
    the room with the matching crib ensemble. I even found
    a Peter Rabbit night light! BTW, if you are looking for
    theme things that are unusual (like the nightlight) Ralph
    Jordan on 2A in Acton, Ma carries a large selection - they
    have the Winnie the Pooh, Paddington Bear, Beatrix Potter, etc.
    They also gift wrap it beautifully! 
    

    Boy, I second the nixing tie bibs.  Those things are the
    biggest pain!  Especially when the baby is getting bigger
    and doesn't "want" a bib on.   Plus, my daughter had tons
    of hair, and with the ties - it was added confusion.
    
    					cj *->

    
    
    Sandy,
    
    I still use the little Peter Rabbit bag that was given
    to me at Leominster Hospital...I love it.
    
    But, good point!  You may want to check with the hospital (?)
    to be sure they don't give them to new mom's on the way out!
    
    Kristin

    
    At my shower, some relatives (who are crafty) got together and
    gave me this HUGE basket with a HUGE balloon attached on top (looked like
    a hot air balloon).  The basket was FILLED with little odds'n ends,
    like;  Q-tips, alcohol prep pads (for baby's belly-button stub), 
    powder, nursery vasaline, diapers, wipes, bibs, bottles, and tons
    of other things that are so useful.
    
    I'd have to say that it was one of my favorite gifts. You can always
    use duplicates of the things that were in that basket - and you will!
    
    I'd also recommend buying one of the larger items as mentioned in
    previous notes.  Try to coordinate with whoever is planning the 
    shower to see if someone else has already purchased the item first.
    Many times, family will buy things like the stroller, car seat, etc.
    
    Have fun with the gift - and get creative if you have the time.
    It makes it so much more memorable!
    
    julie
    

	Wow, this is a great note, it's given me some new ideas and here's
	a few of mine:

	- Regarding the film - great idea, if your crafty or can find this
	  in a craft store, I've given a fabric covered photo album covered
	  in "baby design" fabric, and people have loved that. 
	  Also along theses lines a "Baby's first year" calendar is nice.

	- Re: .14, Judy, I think someone already mentioned painting or 
	                 embroidering the squadron # on a onsie, what about
	                 a blanket?  Someone gave me a blanket with
	                 Stephanie's name and birthdate on it - it will be
                         a keepsake. Sorry I don't know where they got it.

	- I agree with checking with the hospital about the small diaper
	  bag, I got 2 of these for shower gifts and then the hospital
          gave me another one.  I find one really handy, but 3?  I use
	  one of the spares to carry the baby's toys in.

	- A great book that I received at my shower was "What to expect the
	  first year" and "What to expect the toddler years"

	- It is also wonderful to give something for mom-to-be.  My mother
	  and sister got me a night shirt with buttons (since they knew I
	  would be nursing) a light weight bathrobe since I was delivering
	  in april, and new slippers.  This was nice, it was practical,
	  not a sexy things, but pretty and new.  I really appreciated it.

	- Another really nice thing to do, that a few friends have done for
	  me and I've done for others now is help with food when the baby
          arrives.  I bring a casserole or stew or lasagna, something that
	  can be frozen if they don't want to eat it right away.  I bring
	  it the first time I visit and then sometimes a few weeks later.
          When the baby is new and mom & dad are sleep deprived, no one wants
	  to think about cooking dinner.  I didn't have to cook for 2 weeks
	  after Stephanie was born. 
	  Also, along these lines, if you go to visit, bring some cookies,
          a bread, muffins or pizza (don't ask, most mom's will say "oh, you
          don't need to do that" But if you bring it - they'll love it) At
	  least I did when people who visited brought something to eat.
          Call on your way and say you need to stop at the supermarket for 
	  bread or whatever (make something up) on your way over anyway and
	  since your stopping anyway, does the new mom need milk, diapers,
	  whipes, batteries, film???

	So many great ideas.... baby's are alot of fun!!!  I love giving
	presents!

	Karen T.

    Things that I really liked (either immediately when I got it, or
    when I started to use it):
    
    - baby socks and cotton knit hat (forgot to get those!)
    - a nursing nightgown for the mom 
    - tie-on TV booties
    - simple handmade baby quilt (a lovely surprise gift!)
    - bathtub sponge (the kind baby lies down in in the tub)                
    - handmade bibs (lasted like iron!)
    - any labor of love gifts: cross-stitched blankets, sheets, decorations,
      handmade sweater sets, etc..Wonderful for keeping til they are grown!
    - Since she's a special cousin, maybe you could ask her what some of
      HER favorite childhood items were and surprise her with some of
      similar items for her child (or look at some of her favorite baby
      photos for ideas).
    - How about pulling together a copy of the family tree for the new baby?   

    For the Squadron/Japan noter:  If the baby is a girl, take a pair of
    white cotton "fancy pants" the diaper cover type panties with lace
    around the legs and have the squadron number/color embroidered on the
    behind of the pants.  I did this for someone who was having a girl
    and embroidered her name on the behind in pink.  The panties were
    ~$5 at the local department store and ~$8 for the embroidering at
    a professional embroiderer.  I *can not* embroider and didn't know
    anyone who could.  If the baby is a boy, have a baby-size basecall cap
    embroidered or airbrush painted with the squadron number/color. 
    A silver baby rattle that looks like a barbell with squadron
    number/color engraved on it...
    
    
    For the other ideas:  If you don't want to use a diaper bag for all the
    misc. little items, I used one of those tall Baby bottle looking banks.
    They come in pink, blue, white, yellow.  This does double duty as well.
    For now it is a container, later the baby uses it as a toy, then a
    bank.  
    
    Food is what I appreciated most after I came home.  My husband was not
    familiar with the kitchen, so to speak....  Someone brought us a 
    Honey Baked Ham/Heavenly Ham.  This was greatly appreciated.  It lasted
    more than one meal, could be eaten hot, cold, sandwiches.. at midnight
    without cooking...versatile.   The idea of the functional gown,
    slippers, and robe is wonderful...
    
    

    When you bring food, keep in mind that the baby may be sensitive to
    certian foods mom may eat (if she's nursing, of course).  Now this is
    according to the lactation expert (and nurse/practitioner) at my
    pediatricians office.  My baby would seem to be miserable when I ate
    something with tomato sauce, he hated onions, he loved garlic....
    
    I received one of the covered albums from a friend and co-worker, I
    have it here at work in fact.  I took that and used it for inspiration
    and made 7 of them for family members who love them as much as I love
    mine.
    
    If you buy a car seat or big ticket item, make sure it's the one the
    mom and dad want or hold onto the receipt.  I was pretty particular
    about which style carseat, stroller, etc. that we used.  If someone is
    already getting a walker, it would still be a good idea to consider the
    excersaucer.  We have both.  When I'm getting ready in the morning and
    Aaron wants to be up and have fun, I'll put him in his excersaucer,
    when my husband or I are able to chase after him, he can go in his
    walker.
    
    Something that I would never had bought for myself that my
    sister-in-law bought for us was a hammock that attaches to the crib. 
    The baby can sleep in that while he or she is tiny.  We only used it
    for a couple of weeks, however, with the hammock came a little device
    that beats like a heart, we used that until very recently (the
    batteries just died and we haven't replaced them).  There are also
    teddybears that make "uterus" noises that you can buy.  I wouldn't buy
    one but if I received one I think I would really appreciate it.
    
    sandy

Gifts ideas that I thought were kind of "special"

If she likes to write, a journal.
How to take care of a new baby book: two I use
   all the time are "Dr Mom" and "What to Expect
   the First Year" 
A new robe, house coat or just something really
   comfortable.
A baby blanket.  My aunt gave me one from a 
   japanese store that was soft, colorful
   and easy to wash.  It seems like this 
   was out on the family room floor the first
   two years.
A photo album.  My cousin gave us a beautiful
   leather photo album so all those first year
   pictures were handy.
Of course the car seat and stroller were well
   used.

	My sister gave me a gift certificate for a massage as
	one of my baby shower gifts.  mmmmm!

	I like "theme" gifts.  Lately, I've gone with a "feeding baby"
	theme - bottles, a bottle "cooler", washable cotton nursing pads,
	burp rags (aka diapers), baby spoons, toddler utensils, baby bowls,
	formula can covers, a baby food grinder, a box of infant cereal...
	any combination of the above, which allows a flexible spending limit.

	I usually give a starter set of playtex nursers.  Nursing mom's
	can freeze breast milk right in the bottle liner.

	I've also given a gift certificate to a children's clothing store.
	I rolled up the certificate and put it inside a cute baby bottle,
	then wrapped the bottle.

	One of my favorite gifts was a wall hanging that matched the
	theme of my daughter's bedroom, but that I'd decided to forego
	because of the cost. 

	I second the idea of bringing a meal after the baby is born.
	My sister sent me a honey baked ham after my daughter was born,
	and I loved it - I froze it in 10 different zip lock bags, and had
	instant meals as needed.  I also loved receiving casseroles and
	other meals that made great leftovers, especially after my second
	child, who was delivered by C-section.

	Lastly, I always try to bring something for Mom to eat when I
	visit in the hospital.  These days, I'd probably bring low-fat
	muffins (although most moms are released before you get to visit
	lately!), as long as the mom hasn't had surgery.  I remember 
	feeling starved after every nursing - hard to find good food at
	2 am!

	Karen

	.33 just reminded me of something.

	As a gift I received a diaper bag with decorated cloth diapers in
	it to use as burp cloths.  They were simply decorated with fabric
	paints and had hearts or bunnys in one color along the bottom 
	and top edges, not too much.  My favorite one is the one that says
	"I love mommy" on one end and "I love daddy" on the other end.
	I always get nice comments on these and they come in handy for
	those endless spit ups or spills.

	My mom liked the idea so after Kristen was born she made some
	up for her in pinks that say "Kristen" on either end. And my
	sister-in-law made some for a baby she knew was going to be a 
	boy with boats and trains.  

	This would work for the squadron in Japan too.  You could just
	paint the number on the bottom.

	Isn't gift giving so much fun!

	Karen T.

    Wow Karen!  I like that decorated burp cloth idea!  I'm going
    to incorporate that in my gift bag when my friend's baby is
    born in October!
    
    						cj *->

    It's not a very personal gift but if the family doesn't have a portable
    phone get them one! It's the one thing I used the most the months that
    I was home with the baby. 
    
    Gail

    There are so many good ideas here.  I'll call my sister (goodbye $$$ at
    over $1/minute!) and let her decide which gift to go with.
    
    I second the idea of a portable phone.  I wouldn't be able to talk to
    anyone without one.  I do the dishes, water the plants, sweep the
    floor, and do many other quiet tasks while I'm on the phone.  Plus,
    it's a great help to following the baby around since he never stays in
    the room that I'm in.  On a regular phone I would have to hang up.  Of
    course, that might help my phone budget!
    
    Thanks again for all the suggestions.
    
    judy

    
    Again, thanks everyone. I would love to have made something for the
    baby, but I didn't think ahead and there wasn't time from when I got
    the invitation to the party. I got the Thermoscan thermometer with a
    package of refill covers and then a bunch of little stuff (digital
    thermometer for travel, desitin, Tempra, Huggies travel wipes, bibs,
    night light, outlet covers, and a really cute colorful textured worm).
    When I find out the colors of the baby's room, I'll probably try to
    make something for him/her.
    
    I had a blast shopping and had to keep myself from buying more!!
    
    Patty

    I used to give humidifiers/vaporizor as baby gifts, because as a 
    new parent, I didn't know I needed one UNTIL THE BABY GOT SICK.
    By then it was late at night.  I can remember getting some funny
    looks from others at the shower, so I stopped doing it.  Although
    I still think it is a good idea.
    
    Then I started giving small comforters that acted like sleeping
    bags.  I thought they were the neatest.  A baby that rolls 
    around in it's sleep could still be kept warm.  Sometimes I 
    used them to keep the baby warm as I carried them to the car
    on those very cold winter days.  It can also be unzipped and
    used as a regular blanket.  My three year old still sleeps
    ON TOP of his.  He cuddles into it.  I don't discourage them
    if they bring them down to snuggle in the morning and I try
    to remember to bring them with me on long car rides in case
    they feel tired.  Stores may only carry them during certain
    times of the year, because they can get hard to find.
    
    I like to give "thought" presents to people I work with or
    know casually.  This can be expensive so I like to give them
    a cute bib that is appropriate.  "When I grow up I want to
    be a ....(fill in the blank to match the Mom's or Dad's
    occupation)."  Or I cross-stitch the name of the baby on
    a small bib.  It let's them know I thought of them.
    
    For all you dedicated readers who got this far down into this 
    notes, I'm giving you a bonus "thought" gift idea.  If you
    are close enough to know the day the baby is born, save the
    newspapers from that day in a large envelope.  I like to give
    it on the one year birthday.  What a great thing for the 
    child to see when they are old enough to read.

I agree a portable phone is a must with a 
new baby!!!

I have a friend who sews professionally.  She
offered to make the crib bumper pads, pillows,
comforter, ruffle and curtains.  I bought the
material and she did all the rest.  So if you
have a hidden talent and available time, something
along this line could be VERY special.

    One of the favorite gifts I got for my baby shower was a gift
    certificate to Victoria's Secret.  That way, when the baby had a fussy
    evening, I could leave her with her daddy, and get out of the house on
    my own.  I could also buy something that would boost the morale a 
    little!!
    
    I've gotten that for showers I've attended, and it was always a hit. 
    
    Carolyn 

    
    Didn't make it through all the replies, but here's some ideas;
    
    - Film, but also include "developing" coupons, so she can get it
      developed right away without having to wait for cash.
    - Over-the-back-of-the-car-seat bag.  This straps over the back of a
      bucket seat, and is usually a mesh bag, to hold toys, diapers
      whatever, in the car (I STILL wish I had one!)
    - "Cup holder" that clips to the side of a stroller.  GREAT for mom to
      take a walk and have a drink at the same time.
    - Bathtub Thermometer.  The one we have is a tug boat, the bottom part
      is a thermometer strip.
    - Bottle sleeves - they're like those can-wraps to keep the soda cool -
      except this helps keep a bottle warm.  *WONDERFUL* for a winter baby
      when the bottles seem to cool too quickly.
    - Cloth diapers for spit-up rags.
    - Different style pacifiers - kids can be picky!!
    - Tylenol (Suspension drops!  GRAPE! They're the best!)
    - Tylenol? suppositories - necessary if baby is ill
    - 6-pack of ??I'm drawing a blank?? an elecrolyte-type solution for
      when/if the baby's sick and can't have formula/milk
    - 8-pack of ready-to-feed 8oz? cans of formula.  CVS carries them.  You
      might need to know what she plans to use, else get something more
      "harmless" like a soy (Isomil comes to mind).  They're small - just
      enough for 1 bottle.  GREAT for shopping trips!!
    - Jars of baby food and rice (dry) cereal.  I *NEVER* had baby food
      when I wanted to try it out with mine .... the stuff is good
      'forever' too.
    - Pajamas for Mom that have buttons or snaps down the front - makes
      breastfeeding a bazillion times easier!
    - A Little Golden Book or two
    - A subscription to a Parenting-type magazine.  
    - Newborn and 1 or 2 sizes up, diapers.  Newborn diapers don't usually 
      have girl/boys, and you can usually find "generic" Pampers etc in
      smaller quantities (and higher prices!) at convenience stores.  Or
      store brands usually don't discriminate between the sexes (-;
    - Diaper wipes, and/or a diaper-wipe warmer
    - *SMALL* bottles of baby bath/shampoo.  If you get the "trial size"
      bottles, they're perfect (I prefer the Baby Magic ones to Johnson and
      Johnson because B.M. has snap-lids.)  Toss the little bottles in the
      tub with baby, and by the time you need them, they soap inside is
      warm.  Refill from larger size bottles.
    - Small container of cornstarch baby powder - smaller's easier to
      handle with a wriggling baby!
    - Balmex ??  Is that the name of it?  Diaper-rash ointment.  It's been
      a while.!  Desitin is REALLY hard to get off of the skin after. 
      Balmex doesn't have that problem.  J&J makes an over-night zinc oxide
      ointment too, which is similar.
    - A baby monitor (PRICELESS!)  Make sure that BOTH ends can operate on
      a battery.
    - Blankets that are larger than the typical "receiving blanket" size. 
      I always had tons of tiny ones, but as the kids grew, they got cold
      (-:  ~3' square is a nice size.  Prefer cotton.
    - Nipple washer for the dishwasher.  It's a container to hold all the
      nipples etc so you can stick it in the dishwasher.
    - Baby food jar carousel
    - Room humidifier
    - A blank "journal" for Mom to write to her baby, different thoughts,
      milestones etc. 
    
    An idea for the shower .... get a blank book (as above), and have each
    person at the party write in at least two "tips" to help with the baby.
    Ideas might include ways to soothe them, tips for getting stains out of
    clothes, getting more sleep, less laundry - or whatever might help Mom
    learn how to be a less frazzled Mom!  Even just helpful words of
    wisdom - whatever.
    
    AFTER, definitely "bring food".  A friend of mine had no qualms asking.
    I called one time shortly after her baby was born, and asked "So, can
    we come visit you and Gabrielle?"  and she replied "Well, if you bring
    me lunch you can!".  FINE with me, and we all had a nice time.  And did
    some laundry and took out the trash while we were there.  Nice to be
    able to ask for help - and even nicer to be able to help!

    My husband and I picked something up this weekend that *I* think would
    make a good gift (at least I would have loved it, though maybe not at
    first).  Aaron wakes up most mornings kind of stuffy, so this weekend
    we picked up an aircleaner/humidifier combination.  It cleans pollen,
    smoke, dust, etc. out of the air through the summer and humidifies and
    cleans the air in the winter.  We've been using it for several days and
    Aaron hasn't been waking up stuffy at all.  I realize that there are
    other factors that could be effecting him as well, but I think it's
    helping.
    
    Now, I probably would have given the gift giver a funny look before
    lavishing my thanks on her/him, but I would have loved to have this
    thing long before now!  The aircleaner is supposed to get 97% of the
    pollutants in the air, it's not a class II medical device, but for the
    price it will do exactly what we want.  Now, if I can just figure out what
    the ionizer does and if it's good or bad...
    
    sandy

    
    hi sandy,
    
    i haven't seen an aircleaner/humidifer device.  i have a humidifier
    at home.  what brand makes the one you got?  i'd like to see one and
    possibley get one.
    
    jo

	Hi,

	My sister-in-law is pregnant and due Feb 8th.  She lives in Virginia
	and there is no family there.  My brother-in-laws relatives live
	in Washington state.  We all live in Mass.  (This is my husbands
	sister)  My mother-in-law would love to give her a shower when she
	comes home for Christmas.  But she is afraid that at 8months pregnant,
	AnnMarie will decide the 8-10 hr drive home is too much for the
	holidays.  So we're trying to decide if we should plan a shower	
	anyway and then if she doesn't come up, just have my mother-in-law
	bring the gifts down when the baby is born.  (She's planning a week
	long visit as soon as the baby is born - this is at my sister-in-laws
	request)  

	I thought I had read somewhere in here about giving a shower to a
	relative that lived far away, any ideas??

	My mother's suggestion is that we plan a shower and if AnnMarie can't
	make it one of us puts a pillow under our shirt and opens all the gifts
	and we video it.  But the gifts would still need to get brought down
	to AnnMarie via my mother-in-law and I think she would have more fun
	opening them herself.  But then she just gets a bunch of gifts with
	out the shower.

	Thanks for any ideas,
	Karen T. 

    Some people have done a "reverse" baby shower, where they get together
    and video tape wrapping the presents, and also add some of their own
    advice about babies and baby-raising.  
    
    meg

    In answering the question about the humidifier/air cleaner combo, we
    bought it at Walmart and it is made by Holmes (we also have a holmes
    humidifier we used last year and have been satisfied it).  Our only
    qualms was that we didn't see another winter filter (air cleaner and
    humidifier filter combined), but there's plenty of time for them to get
    one, and if they don't we'll either ask them to order some or order
    them from Holmes directly.  We like it so far, but we're only using the
    air cleaner right now (there's plenty of humidity in the air as it is!)
    
    sandy

    We did something like this, only for a bridal shower.  The reason we
    did was because we couldn't make the trip to Florida to have the shower
    in person, so those of us up here got together & had a gift wrapping
    party without the honored guest. We did everything - decorations, 
    refreshments etc., taped it all, everyone contributed some memory about 
    the bride which was also taped & then we sent the tape, gifts, and 
    decorations we'd used down to the bride's future mother-in-law. She had 
    a party down there, using the same decorations. After the gifts were 
    unwrapped, they played our video.  They also taped the party down there, 
    and sent the video up here. We passed it around to every guest who'd come 
    to the local party.  Worked out well where distance prevented us all from 
    getting together in person.

    The advice on parenting thing is a nice touch and could be done at a
    regular type shower as well. As the mother-to-be opens each gift, the 
    giver of the gift gives their advice.  Gee, you could even make an
    album like this, photo of each person on one page with their advice 
    written in on the adjoining page.

    Leslie

   Oops, I just discoverd by going back & reading the notes prior to yours
   that a long-distance situation is exactly what you were talking about
   Meg.  It pays to know the context I guess --- and to have a better
   memory than I do :-).

   Leslie

	We did the same thing for my sister-in-law.   After the
	shower, I packaged all the gifts into a large box and 
	shipped it, along with the video *and* the decorations, to
	my s-i-l.

	She opened the gifts first, then watched the video.

	It was a total surprise, and turned out to be the only shower
	she got.  She really appreciated it.

	We didn't need to stuff any pillows under shirts, though.  I
	was 8 months pregnant at the time, and big enough for both of
	us !

	Karen

    Karen,
    
    We must be living parallel lives!   We did the same (reverse
    shower) for my s-i-l.   Our babies were born 29 days apart and
    she hadn't seen any pictures of me pregnant.  We taped her baby
    shower when I was eight months, no scratch that, nine months
    along.  It, too, was her only baby shower.   Word has it, she
    cried!  Imagine that!  :-)
    
    						cj *->