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Conference moira::parenting

Title:Parenting
Notice:Previous PARENTING version at MOIRA::PARENTING_V3
Moderator:GEMEVN::FAIMANY
Created:Thu Apr 09 1992
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1292
Total number of notes:34837

523.0. "Sick time to be with sick kids" by SMAUG::COGAN (Kirsten A. Cogan) Thu May 27 1993 13:10

    
    Does anyone know if DEC has a policy on using sick time when your kids
    are sick?  Can your manager make you use vacation time?
    
    Kirsten Cogan
    
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523.1CNTROL::STOLICNYThu May 27 1993 13:1816
    
    RE: Does anyone know if DEC has a policy on using sick time when your
    kids are sick?
    
    No, but the orange-book undoubtedly has a section on sick time and
    I'm pretty sure it covers *personal* illnesses, not those of your
    children.
    
    RE: Can your manager make you use vacation time?
    
    I believe so.
    
    Probably not the answer you want to hear, but I agree with the
    policy.
    
    
523.2I think it depends...STAR::AWHITNEYThu May 27 1993 13:191
It's probably like everything else...."Up to your managers discretion.."
523.3sick vs vacOASS::FLASHE::BURDEN_DThis is a Studebaker YearThu May 27 1993 14:214
  I agree with .1 - Sick time is for when you are sick.  Time off to tend
  for a sick child/parent/spouse would be vacation.
  
  Dave
523.4CNTROL::JENNISONJohn 3:16 - Your life depends on it!Thu May 27 1993 14:329
	This question was asked at our site's meeting last fall to review
	changes to the disability plans.

	The personnell rep. unequivocally stated that sick time is *not*
	for taking time off to care for sick children.  It is only to be
	used if the employee herself is sick.

	Karen
523.5POBOX::PALASEK_LWed Jun 02 1993 15:388
    My husband's company provides 3 "family" sick days each year to be used
    for child/spouse/parent illness.  I very seldom use a sick day (maybe
    one a year).  When I have children, I would think that it shouldn't be
    any issue to stay home with a sick child considering I never use my own
    days.  I know several people who take 10-20 sick days a year and stay
    home "sick" if they stay out too late the night before.  I wish Digital 
    would allocate XXX number of sick days to each employee and allow us to
    use them for personal or family illness.
523.6any day my child is sick is a "sick day"MSHRMS::SCANLONWed Jun 02 1993 17:292
	I would use any time I had to use to take care of my sick child.....
523.7SMAUG::COGANKirsten A. CoganThu Jun 03 1993 12:0720
    
    I will stay home with my sick children no matter what I have to use for
    time - even if I had to take it unpaid.  
    
    I've been with Digital for 6 years and have never been asked to use
    vacation time to stay home with a sick kid.  I've allways had
    understanding managers when it came to my kids - probably because they
    too have children.  I allways thought it was a part of the sick time
    policy that you could use the time for your children.  I'm never out
    sick for myself - when my kids are sick is the only time I use it. 
    
    I've asked quite a few people in all different groups and couldn't find
    one person who doesn't use there sick time when there kids are sick. 
    
    The thing that really bugs me about this is the unfairness between the
    wage classes.  I'm sure that a wage class 4 person in my group would
    NOT be expected to take vacation time.  
    
    Kirsten
    
523.8flexibility has to go both ways.MARX::FLEURYThu Jun 03 1993 14:1918
Apparently official DEC policy clearly states that we should use vacation
time to stay home with sick kids.

But I am glad that most managers are flexible on this issue.  I asked my 
manager specifically about this recently.  His response was that although
official policy was that I should take vacation time to stay home when my
daughter was sick - he knew I put in plenty of extra time as needed and he
wasn't going to begrudge me a day here or there with a sick kid.

Conversely,my husbands company (MITRE) is extremely rigid and inflexible
when it comes to what hours you work and how you fill out your time card.
Since the company is inflexible about how employees work - the employees
tend to be equally inflexible (ie people rarely work long days, and nobody
ever gets any comp time)

Personally, I prefer working in a more flexible environment.

- Carol
523.9Take sick time if you have itNETWKS::COZZENSFri Jun 11 1993 10:358
    If you are entitled to sick time then why not take it.  Who is to say
    that you or your child is sick.  
    
    It comes down to manager/employee agreement.  I, personally, have taked
    sick time to stay home with a sick child and would do it again if I had
    to.   
    
    Lisa Cozzens
523.10BCSE::WEIERPatty, DTN 381-0877Fri Jun 11 1993 11:5112
    >>If you are entitled to sick time then why not take it.  Who is to say
    >>that you or your child is sick.
    
    Why not?  Because if you get caught, and your mgr wants to make a beef
    about it, it's grounds for termination .... falsifying your time card.
    Misuse of time off ... I'm sure there's a few others, but I know of a 
    guy who called in sick (and wasn't), and popped down to the store for
    a minute.  His mgr just HAPPENED to be at the same store on lunch
    break, saw him, and fired him.
    
    I'd work it out ahead of time with your mgr!
    
523.11I'm sick Not DEADWMOIS::REILLY_RMon Jun 14 1993 13:1011
    Well I would also take a "sick"day if my child was sick......I would 
    challage "ANY" Manager to "PROVE" that I wasn't sick!!!! Just because
    I went to the store doesn't mean I did not need to get ,Medication, go
    to the Doctors office....or any number of things....I might have been
    really sick @8:00 in the morning and by 1:00 felt well enough to get
    some food......Who knows.........And unless A Manager wants to deal w/
    and employee that is really sick and personal,,,,,I would not worry,,,,
    unless of course you call in sick and are found at the local
    "bar"hmmmmmm...................just my 2cents
                                              Bob
    
523.12Family leave takes effect August 5SALES::LTRIPPMon Jun 14 1993 13:4920
    I scanned an article in the June issue of Working Mother Magazine last
    week.  It seem that as of August 5, if your company has more than 50
    employees you are entitled, by law, to family leave for the illness of
    a child, spouse, parent (I think there were more categories) you get
    the idea.  Now this won't help with the day here, day there situation,
    but in the case of extended illness, or long term injury it is a real
    blessing!  Trust me, I'm the mom who has spent literally up to a month
    at the side of a sick, post operative child, more times than I care to
    remember.  and during this time there was NO PAY!  I had simply left
    work to care for my child, because HE was my priority.  Yes the budget
    was extremely tight, but my son means more to me than any job!
    
    I think the law requires a 30 day or some time frame notice, but in
    sudden illness or injury I think it has to be waived by the employer. 
    There is an appeal process spelled out as well.  I think the whole
    period is understood to be unpaid, unless the employer has a payment
    policy.
    
    FYI,
    Lyn
523.13Mental Health Important!!ZEKE::DYERMon Jun 14 1993 15:2722
    I agree with you Bob.  Let some manager tell me I wasn't sick cause
    I went to the store!!!!!!!??????  You've got to be kidding me!  That
    guy must have been awful stupid!!   I have been very sick and HAD to
    go to the store for one reason or another cause no one else was there
    to wait on me!
    
    I, too, do not take all my sick days so if my kid is sick I am also
    sick!!  Flexibility does go both ways!  If you aren't flexible and
    trusting of your employees then you create a hostile environment
    in which employees will never work overtime and will take ALL their
    sick time no matter what!
    
    Vacation time is vacation time and should be used as such!  Mental
    health is also very important!!!!!!!!  Too many people disregard 
    mental health and end up too stressed and burnout comes after that.
    When people get to burnout and are stressed you don't get too much
    productivity out of them!
    
    Blah Blah..blah...  I could get carried away with this one!  It 
    hits a cord with me.
    
    Nancy
523.14Moderator suggestionMOIRA::FAIMANlight upon the figured leafMon Jun 14 1993 16:249
As is clear from the notes here, some managers are more less flexible than
others.  However, it seems fairly clear that, if your manager does not allow you
to take sick time for a sick child, you're way outside the bounds of the
company's personnel policies if you lie to him or her about it.  I, for one,
would be more than a little hesitant to boast in a notes file, in front of an
audience of thousands (possibly including my manager) about my willingness to
violate company rules and lie to him or her.

	-Neil Faiman, PARENTING co-moderator
523.15Unfair!SALEM::GILMANMon Jul 12 1993 12:5614
    Fired because the manager saw him at the store......
    
    Geez.  I was out with a strep throat and didn't WANT to go out... but
    for two reasons had to. 
    
    1. To go to the Dr. to get a diagnosis and prescripion for an
    antibiotic.... and  2. to the local Store 24 for shut in material:
    tissues, soft drinks.... and 'survival' while I was sick stuff.
    There was noone to go for me... had to do it myself.
    
    Now if I had been at a bar or movie on on some obviously recreational
    persuit that would be another matter, but the store! Give me a break.
    
    Jeff
523.16CSC32::S_MAUFEthis space for rentMon Jul 12 1993 14:5113
    
    I think Digital is reasonable enough to listen to why the employee was
    in the store when off ill. Some employers would probably fire you
    without listening, I don't think Digital would.
    
    I'm in a different bind. I seem to be slated to work the next 7 Sundays
    in a row. So I sit here in CXO waiting for customers call. On a Sunday
    its kind quiet, so I made a suggestion. Pay me for 6 hours rather than
    8, and I'll work 8 hours from home. I have 2 lines, it a win-win.
    
    Nope! My manager didn't nibble, its a shame!
    
    Simon