Conference moira::parenting

    LYNN:
    
    When Caitlin was due last year I had two due dates, May 22, May 30th
    and I didn't have her until June 8th and this was after being induced.
    
    I think they sometimes they give you an estimated date the first time
    that the doctor sees you. Then after a couple of months and after other
    ultrasounds they can get a better idea how fast the baby is developing,
    based on the cranial closure, femur length).
    
    So be be alarmed if they tell you a different date - you may not even
    go on the date - I was two weeks late !!
    

	Hi,

	I'm 20 1/2 weeks now and I just went for an appointment yesterday
        were my doctor discussed the results of my ultrasound.

	The ultrasound was done when I was 18 1/2 weeks but the baby's
	size showed that it was only 17 1/2 weeks.  My doctor said it's
	nothing to worry about and that I should plan on being late, although
        he's not going to change my due date (April 17th) at this time.

	He said that it will be taken into consideration if it becomes 
	necessary to induce labor.  He said if a women hasn't started
	labor 2 weeks after her due date then they usually induce her
	then, but in my case they may wait a few more days.  (All this
	sounds fine now, but from what I hear I'll be very anxious to
	deliver at that time, so I probably won't be happy waiting a few
	more days.  This is my first pregnancy).  Basically he said
	we'll wait and see what's happening when I get closer to the due
	date.

	Another factor is that at the time I became pregnant my cycle was
	about 35 days long (as opposed to 28 days).  So it's very likely
	that I ovulated later and that I am about a week behind.  I'm not
	too worried about the due date now, I just wish I would feel this
	little baby move, the doctor said I should feel movement any day
        now.  At least I got to hear the heart beat again yesterday.	

	Lynn, when your 9 months pregnant and uncomfortable, you'll probably
	be very happy to deliver on April 22nd instead of May 1st.
	If I deliver late, our babies will probably be born around the same
	day.

	Happy Pregnancy!
	Karen :)

    It is so funny to read this note because I had a ultrasound on November
    20th when I was 23 weeks pregnant. Based on the length, head size, and
    chest size of the fetus,the ultrasound technician moved my due date
    up by three weeks. Notice that the due date was moved up based on size
    alone not on developmental features of the baby. I know when I got 
    pregnant because I was on fertility drugs so I am assuming this is 
    just a big baby boy
    
    My doctor believes that two weeks after your due date, the placenta
    no longer nurishes the baby and the baby needs to come out (this
    belief is under debate in the OB\GYN community). The latest he
    wants me to deliver is March 19th, two weeks late from the new
    due date. I want to wait a week later, March 26th because that is
    was my original due date. So we are going to play the wait and see
    game. I had a C-section with Marisa and had planned to try a VBAC
    but with a baby that could be well over 10lbs. I think I will opt
    for a C-section again.
    
    Hope this gives you some insight into a similar situation.
    
    Donna                                                     
    
    

    
    
    This is great to read, with my first Emily my due date was May 28th she
    was induced June 12 and born that day.  I'm now 18 1/2 weeks and my 
    due date is May 3.  Boy it's going to be a baby boom at Dec from March
    thru May.  I have a feeling this one will be 10 lbs maybe a little more
    since Emily was 9 lbs.
    
    Well happy pregnancy evertone.
    Lisa

    I was told that my due date was August 9 but the ultrasound said
    August 1.  I believed the August 1 due date because I knew when 
    I got pregnant (long story).  They induced my on August 12 and Kendrick
    was born that day at 9lbs. 14ozs.  They said that my placenta was 
    definitely old (whatever that means) and he would have had to have
    been born within a couple more days or it would not nourish him any
    longer.  They said something about the placenta being greenish instead
    of reddish???  Anyway, Kendrick is almost four months old now and such
    a delightful baby:>)
    
    Good luck
    
    Vickie

    My original due date was May 17 (based upon last period).  The doctor
    who did my ultrasound gave me a due date of May 14.  Sarah was born May
    2 and weighed 7 lb 12oz.
    
    My mom was early with all 3 of us, the closest she ever got to her due
    date was 10 days before.  I guess I just follow the family history. 
    When it's time for the next one I'm just going to assume my due date is
    2 weeks earlier than the doctor tells me.
    
    Susan

    With my first child 2 years ago, I was given a Nov. 14 due date.  The
    ultrasound gave a due date of Nov. 18.  My son was born on Nov. 11.
    My doctor didn't adjust the due date, he said if they are within a
    week of each other he will not change his date.  He also will not
    change a date just because of the ultrasound, he waits to see how
    the measurements coordinate with the due date for a while before he
    will change the date.  This time around he gave me a due date of Dec.
    19, the ultrasound said Dec. 21.  This one was kind of wierd, because
    it was calculated off 1/2 day of spotting, rather than a regular
    period.  Me being the optimist that I am decided they were both
    probably wrong and said the date would be Nov. 20.  Well, I'm still
    here and still pregnant, so I guess the doctor was right after all!
    My current prediction is for Dec. 12, only because my son's birthday
    is 11/11, and think it would be neat to have the second one be on
    12/12!  Ironically enough, my husbands sister had her 2 girls on 9/9
    and 10/10, so maybe we'll carry on the tradition!
    
    Best of luck to all of you to be moms out there, as the last noter
    said, the baby will come when it's ready, just hopefully for the mom's
    it's not too far past the due date.  I only have ~2 weeks to go and
    I can say I am very ready now...maybe that's due to it being my second
    child and I'm very anxious and excited to meet him/her.
    
    Again, best of luck and Happy Holidays to all,
    Von

    I can't resist telling my story here!  At my ultrasound, the technician
    reported an anticipated due date of March 27 based on measurements of
    the fetus.  My doctor did not change my due date of April 7 because we 
    both *knew* the date of conception!! 
    
    The doctor and I were right!  Even though I had Shannon at 26 weeks,
    she was gestationally exactly a 26 weeker...just a little larger than
    most!  (all 900 grams!)
    
    -beth

    I had no idea exactly when I bacame pregnant, so the original date was
    a pure guess at sometime the end of June.  After the first ultrasound,
    they moved the date to mid July.  After the second ultrasound the
    date was moved again to the end of July.  Stephanie was born the
    end of June.  My OB/GYN said she was just early, but I still believe
    the first guess was most accurate.
    
    					Mair
    

    
    
    My original due date was Feb. 12th.  I then had an ultrasound at
    11 1/2 weeks and they changed my due date to Feb. 16th.  I had
    Nicholas on Feb. 28th (2 hours before leap year) weighing in a
    9 lbs. 15oz and 22 1/2 inches long.  My husband said that i had
    delivered a 3 month old (felt like it too!).
    
    There were a lot of boys born around the time I had Nicholas (2/92).
    I wonder if the "new batch of bambinos" will be mostly girls?
    
    -chris

    The ultrasound measures (among other things) cranial closure,
    femur length, and I think the size of the liver or the stomach.
    It's been a couple of years....
    
    I had no ultrasounds with my first.  With my second, however,
    I had ovulated very irregularly before I got pregnant.  At my
    first prenatal exam, I was told my due date was June 6 (this is
    in '91), based on the date of the last menstrual period.  I thought
    this was off by at least 2 and possibly 3 weeks.  Early in what
    everyone thought was my second trimester, my doctor ordered the
    ultrasound because he said I was small for my dates.  The ultrasound
    was pretty inconclusive in that I was given three possible due dates,
    all around the middle of June.  The date the doctor wrote on his chart
    was June 17.  I remember saying to one of my sisters that I STILL
    thought that due date was wrong; that the baby "wasn't supposed to be
    born" till the 20th or 25th of June.  My daughter was born on June 24,
    48 hours after my OB/GYN stripped the membranes.  If he hadn't done
    that I suspect she'd still be in there.  BTW, she was 7 lbs. 9 oz.
    and 20 inches long.  That is about as average-sized as it gets.
    
    If you think you might be early/late, you are probably right.  My due
    date with my son was March 22.  Everyone said I would go early because
    I was so enormous.  I said the kid would be born between the 19th and
    the 26th of March, probably closer to the 26th.  He was born on the
    26th.  He was supposed to be taken by C-section on the 28th, but he
    had other ideas.  And he's had 'em ever since.

    RE. -7 and having a history of delivering early.  I, too, came from 
    a long family history of never making it to the due date.  Considering
    my mother, all of my aunts on my mother's side, and my only sister,
    every single delivery was at least 2 weeks before the due date, with 
    most about 1 month before the due date.  When I had Johnathan, I also
    delivered 2 weeks before my due date.
    
    The problem is that Digital uses the due date that the doctor writes on
    your short term disability paperwork in order to decide what day to 
    let you "out."  They let you out 2 weeks before your due date.  So if
    you're like me and my family, you end up having the baby on your last
    day of work, and never get that 2 week "rest" that you're entitled to.
    
    Jane
                                                   

    re: 12  digital and "expected" due date.
    
    I got bit by that. My last day before starting STD was Friday, May 1. 
    I had all sorts of plans for the next week, packing my bag, grocery
    shopping, cleaning, etc.  I never made it.  My daughter decided she
    wanted out and I went into labor Saturday, May 2 at 4 am.
    
    Next time I'll "know" better.
    
    Susan

    
    Your Dr. can take care of this if he feels you need to be out of work
    sooner.  With my first son, my due date was the middle of June ... but
    by the middle of May my Dr. said no way are you going to make it till
    June.  He wrote a letter to DEC and I was put on leave a month before
    my due date.  I didn't end up delivering until June 29th. I was out a full 
    6 weeks before the baby was born, and was paid the whole time.  I still 
    got my 6 weeks after too.  My Dr. had said he wished he new it was that 
    easy, he would have had me out of work even sooner.  He was definitely
    from the old school way of thinking ... pregnant women shouldn't be
    working.
    
    Joyce
       

    re: 14
    
    But, it really does depend upon your doctor.  Mine was very
    progressive, his philosophy was "You're not sick, you're pregnant."
    There were only 3 things he told me I had to stop: scuba diving,
    running after my 4th month (too much stress on my hips and knees) and
    no more flying lessons (unpressurized cabins are a no no), otherwise I
    could pretty much continue on as usual, within moderation, of course.
    
    I don't think he expected me to go so soon, my internal wasn't
    scheduled until the next visit, which I never made it to. As far as my
    mother's history went, he felt that every one was different and I'd go
    when I'd go.  
    
    I also think there has to be a medical reason for you to go out on STD
    earlier, or stay out longer.  I was perfectly healthy before, just
    tired, he really didn't have a reason to go them and say "She should be
    out now."    Now, if only I could have recouped those 2 weeks at the
    end!!!!! (I did try but was turned down, again, no medical reason and
    exhaustion doesn't cut it.)

    I have very irregular cycles so each of my girl's due dates were not
    correct.  
    
    My first was due on March 11.  Ultrasound agreed with this date.  She
    was born (induced) on March 22.  The doctor felt she was 40 weeks
    and not really late after she was born.
    
    With my second My first due date was October 11 however when I had my
    first internal exam the doctor felt that I was three weeks behind that
    so she adjusted my date to November 1 (I was only 10 weeks pregnant
    when she guessed this).  Ultrasounds during this time confirmed the
    November 1 date.  (Based on when I thought I got pregnant I said
    November 1-3 also.)
    
    I could have left work based on my October 11 work date but I decided
    to stay till two weeks before Nov 1.  I delivered on November 1...
    
    By the way, my doctor not only guessed right on the due date she also
    was only ounces off on her weight predictions by just feeling my
    stomach.  
    
    Angie

	My doctor never suggested moving my due date, but after my
	first ultrasound, said the baby seemed to be about 1/2 week
	ahead of schedule.  

	My water broke 4 days before my due date, and Emily was born
	2 days before the due date.

	Funny thing about my STD:  Everyone asked me if I was "dying"
	for the baby to be born before I left work.  I said "No, I
	want her to come on time.  I want my two weeks off to 'prepare'."

	I had my two weeks, and Emily was born on the Saturday before
	my due date.  As far as work went, my leave was textbook.  Exactly
	2 weeks before the due date, exactly six weeks after.

	Karen

    
    	I had the same problem with my "expected due date" as far as my DEC
    	let out date. I had an ultrasound at 17 weeks because my dr thought
    	I was carrying big. The ultrasound tech said that the baby looked 
    	about 2 weeks older than my original date. But my doctor didn't
    	change my date. By the end of my 8th month I was having severe back
    	pain, and asked my OB about resetting my due date to allow me out
    	2 weeks earlier. He denied me, so I went to my regular family
    	doctor who was more sympathetic to the pain I was enduring while
    	sitting all day at my terminal, and wrote up the paperwork for my
    	STD to start on Oct 1. My OB's due date had me at Oct 31-Nov 1., 
    	so I would not of been let out of work until Oct 18 if it hadn't
    	been intervened by my family doctor.  
    
    	I delivered on Oct 17.  2 weeks early (as expected by the
    	ultrasound!) And I did get my 2 weeks to "rest" thanks to my family
    	doctor. If I hadn't pressed it, I would of been at work the day
    	I went into labor!
    
    	Chris
    

My wife knew exactly when we conceived the baby due to the fact that she kept a
temperature chart.  She actually ovulated on day 24 of her cycle, but all the
doctors and midwives insisted on working out her due date as 40 weeks after the
first day of her last cycle where day 14 is the "typical" day of ovulation.
Supposedly 266 days after ovulation is the more accurate way of calculating the
average time of when a baby pops out.

Needless to say, after working out all the calculations the doctors and midwives
were adamment that Jane was due 10 days before Jane's calculations.

When the official due date came and went Jane had a lot of arguments about all
the dates.  Luckly enough Jane went into labour 266 days after we conceived :-)

So to conclude, take all the dates you're given with a pinch of salt.  He/she
will come when he/she is ready.


Cheers

Steven

My first pregnancy I was unsure how far along I was. (I'm very irregular and have 
a long cycle) The ultrasound showed I was appx 12 weeks when my doctor thought I 
was about 14 weeks. My due date was set for April 7th based on the ultrasound. 
I went into labor April 7th and delivered Kevin April 9th.  My last pregnancy, 
just eighteen months ago the ultrasound based due date for May 12th.  Michael 
was born May 14th.  The original due date was May 8th based on basal chart. I took
fertility medicine, Clomid so I knew when I became pregnant for Michael.

Tomorrow I go for an ultrasound and an amio (Maybe, if I don't cancel) for my 
third pregnancy.  Currently, the due date is May 17th, but that will probably be 
adjusted after tomorrow. Here I thought it was stress from work and my father 
dieing this past September and actually I am pregnant.

re .19:
    For my second child, I knew how they calculated dates, and I knew the
    conception date for the baby, so I calculated a date for my last period
    to make the doc's calculation come out to the "correct" due date.
    Worked just fine - I went into labor on the afternoon of that "correct"
    date.  :)

		cheryl

    I just had an ultrasound yesterday afternoon.  My original due date
    (from my first pre-natal visit) was April 27th (based on the first day
    of my last cycle...you know, the little dial charts they use).  Then when 
    I had my first ultrasound (@ 9 wks) the due date moved up to April 25th.  
    From yesterday's ultrasound, they moved it up to april 21st. 
    
    Which is usually the most accurate??  I have three due dates and don't
    know which to go by.
    
    Julie Plourde
    

    Just go with....
    
    
    			end of April
    
    					8^)
    
    
    
    That's probably the most accurate you'll get!  As far as maternity
    leave goes, it will be whatever the doctor has on record - so see if 
    s/he changes it at your next appointment.
    
    -sandy
    

Also, and maybe more importantly to your sanity at least, whatever your due date
you eventually feel comfortable with add on at least a week in terms of when you
emotionally think your due date is.  The reason for this is that I have heard
that if your baby doesn't actually arrive by your original due date it's natural
to become anxious and impatient.

Cheers

Steven

    My first baby was exactly a week "late."  My second baby was 10 days
    "late" and was induced.  OUCH.
    
    Interestingly enough, both babies were exactly 9 months and 2 days old
    when they were born.
    
    Both babies also had adjusted due dates based on an ultrasound at 9
    weeks.  Of course, both baby's due dates were wrong!  We knew when we
    made them and we knew when they would be here. :^)
    
    Kathy
         

    Boy am I glad I found this note.  I am having problems with my OB and
    my due date.  I say I am about 3-4 weeks ahead of what he said.  His
    original date was September 10th and then at a 9week ultasound changed
    to October 13th.  Everytime I have a new symptom, I have checked my
    book and it seems as though its for the month after.  He said at my
    fifth month appointment that I was the right size.  Since then (3
    weeks) I have gained 1 1/2 inches in my belly but only 1 pound with a
    total of 10 lbs at 6.1 months.  I don't want to lose the 2 weeks prior
    as we have many things to do including possibly moving.  How can I get
    him to look into this further.  He has absolutely not to another
    ultrasound.  Oh, I also started producing milk this past weekend which
    I thought was alittle early for 6 months.
    
    cj
    

    I would believe the ultrasound.  They are the most accurate.
    
    With my 1st, my dates were showing due date of Oct 18th.  I
    had an ultrasound on Monday, Oct 22nd and went into labor that
    night.  The ultrasound had shown due date of the 22nd.
    
    With my 2nd, the ultrasound showed my due date the same as my
    dates.  She ended up being 5 days overdue.  She just didn't 
    want to come out!
    
    I am now on my 3rd and my dates and 2 ultrasounds are showing
    August 18th!
    
    Your dates can always be miscalculated.  The ultrasound measures
    the size of different parts of the baby and that is how the
    due date is determined.  
    
    If there is a questions, your OB will probably do another ultrasound
    when you're further along.
    
    Producing colostrum isn't a sign of how far along you are.  With
    this pregnancy, I started dripping right away!  I mean, this is
    how I knew I was pregnant, before I did a test!
    
    

    Well I am 34 weeks now and I wondering. If most people came early or
    late for their 1st baby? I am getting to the point that 2 weeks early
    sounds good (even though I would have to loose my 2 weeks maternity
    leave). My mother said she was a couple of days late with her first and
    the other 3 of us were early. I was 3 weeks early. Has any one followed
    their mother's pattern?
    
                                         Alice

In one of the (many!) pregnancy books I read, it said that the first baby
is *usually* (emphasis mine) no different from subsequent babies --
that if a woman's first baby is early, then subsequent babies are
usually early and vice versa.  This surprised me because I thought I
had heard that first babies are usually late.

As for me, I delivered one hour before my due date.

And no, I did not follow my mother's pattern -- she delivered both
her children ~2 weeks early.  She had a theory that there's a correlation
between length of cycle and due date:  if your cycle is shorter than
average, you'll deliver early;  if your cycle is longer than average,
you'll deliver late.  Her theory worked for her (her avg. cycle
was 21 days) and for me (I'm pretty average in this regard).  Dunno
what her theory was for those with irregular cycles.

    I was two weeks early, Alyssa arrived during the summer heat wave.  The
    nurses at the hospital stated that there was a higher than usual
    percentage of early births during the warm weather this past summer.
    I had heard that first babies were late, however my ob/gyn stated that
    within 2 weeks early and within 2 weeks late is approximately the same
    probability.  I was glad that I was early!
    
    Nancy 

    I asked my doctor about this one -> taking after my mother wrt having
    babies. He said no. My pregnancy, labor and delivery turned out to be
    very different than my mother's. She was at least a week late with all
    3 babies and had to be induced every time. Labor dragged on forever. 
    
    I on the other hand went a week early and had a text book labor and
    delivery. Well, the pushing part was much shorter than textbook so I
    was lucky. Now I'm hoping baby #2 will be as "easy". I'm also 34 weeks. 
    
    Good luck!
    
    Karen 

    
    My cycle is very regular and at 28 days.  My daughter was 9 days late
    and my son was 11.
    
    judy

    
    	My cycle is very regular - 25 days.  My daughter was 2 days early
    	(though my water broke 4 days early), and my son was 9 days late.
    
    	(I really did expect my son to be early, and think he would have
    	been if he wasn't so big.)
    
    	Karen
    

	With my daughter my cycle was long and my doctor had the same theory
	as a previous noters mother -> that with the long cycle (32days) I
	would deliver late.  My doctor also had the data from the ultra sound
	and my belly measurements.  I really believed I'd be 2 weeks late
	and felt great so I didn't mind at all - SURPRISE - Kristen was
	born 1 week early.

	Now with my second I'm at 37 weeks and really starting to go crazy
	wondering when this baby will be born.  My cycle was a little shorter
	this time (29 days), but my belly is measuring the same.  I feel 
	about the same, except that this time I feel like I've been huge 
	forever....  I'm very anxious to get my shape back and to see this
	little one, but I don't feel ready.  This causes me anxioty every
	night... with Kristen my water broke upon returning to bed after
	a trip to the bathroom around 3:00am.  So now that I know what that
	feels like, each time I return to bed in the middle of the night
	I think "Oh no, is this going to be it, I'm not ready..."  I decide
	this morning, the only way I'm going to relax is to wash those
	baby clothes (at least an outfit to come home from the hospital in)
	and get the bassinet from my mother-in-law this weekend.

	Oh, by the way, my mother was 3 weeks early with both me (started
	labor on her own) and my twin brother&sister (doctor induced her
	3 weeks early because she was so big).

	Good luck everyone,
	Karen T.

    
    My mom was 2 weeks early with her first (me), and 2 weeks late with
    her third.  
    
    I had Lauren 2 days early.  
    
    In all other aspects though, my pregnancy was very much like my
    mothers (no sickness, no swelling, no problem whatsoever).  And no
    stretch marks (which I believe is hereditary).
    
    
    
    Karen

    I think I entered this earlier, but...
    
    My mom was 10 days early with me, 18 days early with my sister and 14
    days early with my brother.  I was 15 days early with my daughter,
    we'll see what this next one decides to do but I suspect it will be
    early.  My mother and I also had similar labors, very easy, very quick.
    As far as cycles go, mine are very short ~24/25 days and regular, my moms 
    were very irregular.
    
    I don't know how hereditary stretch marks are, my mom said she got her
    worst marks from me (oldest), and she has a lot of them and I have none
    from my daughter.  We are built very similar.
    
    Susan

    I wish I followed family history......
    
    Mom was 4 days early with me (oldest), had her 2nd at 4:00am the day
    after her due date, and had my youngest sister on her due date.
    
    My middle sister had the first grandchild.  If she had been in labor
    another 1/2 hr, she would have delivered on her due date.
    
    I was induced at 42 weeks.  At one point they were going to send me
    home to rest.  
    
    Since Russell was 10+lbs at birth, my new Dr has promised that he won't
    let me go 2 weeks late again...Hope hope!
    
    	marianne