Conference moira::parenting

    Look up Montessori in the yellow pages and call -- they have lots of
    information available.  My son has been going since he turned 3 1/2. 
    At first I thought five mornings per week was too much -- it has been
    the best thing we have ever done for him.  The Montessori school he
    goes to only goes through Kinder.  If you cannot find any information,
    I can get you some.  Let me know.

    This is for my granddaughter.  She is very verbal and assertive and
    needs to learn more social skills.  She has been in daycare since
    infancy and in a group situation since 18 months, but her mother thinks
    she would benefit from more structure.  Is that what Montessori offers? 
    (Of course, she is the smartest kid in world.)
    
    Thanks.  Renee

    There is an informative book called (I think) "The Montessori
    Classroom" that describes how the curriculum and materials work.
    Let me know if you are interested and I will find out how you
    can order it. I believe the cost is around $5.00.
    
    As has been said before, the best thing to do is go visit some
    Montessori classrooms and see for yourself. There are so many
    variables that it is hard to say a definitive yes/no to the
    question of whether Montessori would suit an individual child. 
    
    Most schools are very happy to accommodate observers.
    
    Lucy

    I would like to order that book.  If you can find out how I do so, I
    would appreciate it.  Thanks.  Renee

    Hi Renee,
    
    You should have no trouble finding plenty to read about Montessori; 
    last time I was in the States, I picked up her biography and a book
    outlining her method. If you read about her method, you will get a
    better idea if it will benefit your grandchild. I also have an
    address of a place to order Montessori materials if you want that.
    
    Our child was in a Montessori school in the States and we loved it.
    Montessori schools seem much more expensive over in the UK, and not
    as geared up for working parents (for example, they expect your
    child to go home for lunch for 1.5 hours in the middle of the day...).
    
    The Montessori method is all about respect for your child and what
    he or she needs at each stage of its development. For example,
    Montessori places great emphasis on long walks outdoors and
    practical life exercises. So, for example, rather than playing
    with a Fisher-Price toy, your grandchild might plant some seeds
    outside or help clean up after lunch or serve food to the
    other children. Montessori felt children want to partake in
    actual life, not just be relegated to playing with toys.
    
    Well, this is all very general, but thought I'd enter it just
    to give you some idea.
    
    Elizabeth

    Renee,
    
    Last volume of parenting has few topics discussing Montessori
    schools.  You may want to look into it.  After you read about
    Montessori, do visit few Montessori schools.  Each school 
    partice the method differently.  Some schools are very
    Montessori and some schools are between traditional and
    Montessori.
    
    Wendy
    

    The book I have is called A Parents' Guide to the Montessori
    Classroom by Aline D. Wolf.
    
    You can order it by calling the Parent Child Press, (814) 946-5213.
    They publish a catalog of all their titles, which include several
    Montessori-related books.
    
    The address is P.O. Box 767 Altoona, PA 16603.
    
    Lucy

    
    The Holliston School system runs a public Montessori program.
    

    Renee,
    My daughter is currently at the Barat Montessori in Wayland, Ma. We
    chose Montessori over regular nursery school for its structured
    approach to learning. Even after reading everything you can on
    Montessori schools, you need to observe the schools in your area. Each
    school conforms differently to the Montessori method. The Barat school
    emphasizes personal care independence so that the children discuss 
    everything from tucking their mittens into their coat sleeves to
    washing tables after snack. (The table washing is my daughter's
    favorite.) I have also seen that in this school the teachers work
    one-on-one with the children to get them started on a project and then
    step out so that the child can learn on their own. Also most Montessori
    schools do not separate younger and older children. Everyone is part of
    a family. This is great but you need to make sure that the school you
    pick has children in your child's age group. 
    We have been thrilled with our daughter's progress. She is 4 1/2,
    starting to read simple books, and working out basic addition and
    subtraction. She is developing into a determined and hard working
    table-washer. And I have also seen a quest for more knowledge and more
    workbooks, something that daughter #1 didn't pick up in a more social
    oriented nursery school. My daughter is on to public kindergarten next
    year which will be an adjustment. I would prefer to leave her in
    Montessori but there don't seem to be lots of kindergarten children
    scheduled for next year...and the costs are high. This past year was
    $3100 for 5 mornings.
    
    Hope this helps,
    Marjorie Blackwell 
     

    
    Just last week I visited the Montessori school in Nashua, NH.  I was
    impressed with the knowledge that the small children possessed. 
    However, it seemed like such a pressure-filled situation, and it didn't
    look like a real fun place to go to school.
    
    The owner thinks I should enroll my 2 1/2 year old daughter for
    orientation in July and school in September (she'll be 3).  I would
    love to hear any experiences with this particular school.  The learning
    methods seem great, but I have my doubts.
    
    I also couldn't find any other schools in this area, but expected there
    to be one in the Manchester area.  Does anyone know of any other
    Montessori schools in the Southern NH area?
    
    Any input would be appreciated!
    Carol

    Montessori is anything but "pressure-filled."  My son has been going
    for two years and absolutely loves is.  He chooses what he wants to
    work in at a given time with very little assistance from the teachers. 
    As in the last noters comment, my son will be going to kindergarten
    next year as oppossed to staying at Montessori (I have my daugher
    entering Montessori in Sept.).  No one is forced to learn to read or
    add, etc.  He tends to love to work with numbers and can add, subtract
    and do easy multiplication -- because he WANTS to.  All the practical
    life stuff is fun for them...........he can come home and play with
    trucks and other toys.
    

    Most of the notes here appear to be from the States, is there anybody
    who has tried Montessori schools in the UK. My wife's been reading
    "Montessori Play & Learn" which  suggests ways of introducing the
    method at home but is now looking for nursery schools in the Oxford
    area.
    
    Thanks,
    
    David.
    

    
    I was wondering if anyone has had any experiences with Oak Meadow 
    Montessori school in Little Mass (U.S.A).  If you would prefer not to
    post the response here, please contact me at AKOCOA::BOLAND or
    244-7989.
    
    We are planning to enroll our daughter in January (she is 2.9 in Dec).
    She will be attending full time, they have an extended day program.
    I was surprised at the cost.  Full time Montessori, plus summer camps,
    - so full year, full time, was $1000.00 at cheaper than what I'm paying
    at daycare.  Her daycare price will go down as she gets older, but it 
    doesn't have a pre-school and other pre-schools in the area only offer
    part time, not great if mom and dad are working full time.
    
    We go for a classroom visit next Thursday.  Any inputs would be
    helpful.
    
    Rose Marie

    I'm looking for anyone who has had experience (good or bad!) with any
    of the Montessori schools in the Colorado Springs area.  You can
    send me mail if you wish at CSC32::L_WHITMORE.  Thanks!  Lila
    

    Hi,
    
       I am looking for anyone who has some info on the Montessori school
    in Shrewsbury, MASS.  I would like to look into that possibility for my
    daughter who is going to be 3 in January.  Is 3 to early to enroll them
    in schools.  What is the cut-off time and do you know what the
    registration requirements - how soon do the classes fill up....
    
    Thanks for all the replies.
    
    Jay.

    My son attended the Shrewsbury Montessori Center for 2 years.
    They accept children as young as 2 years 9 months old.  The cut-off
    time is September 1.  Your daughter will be a little too young
    this year (she will only be 2 years 7 months by September).  They
    usually don't accept new students in the winter.  Therefore, your
    daugher may have to start in the summer of 1994.  The classes do
    fill up quickly.  I would suggest you call the school now and
    put your name on the waiting list.  They will contact you in the
    spring of 1994.  BTW, the kids must be potty trained to be accepted.
    
    If you have more questions, give me a call.
    
    Wendy

	Does anyone have the phone number and any feedback on the Oak Meadow
Montessori school in Littleton MA?  Please send mail to NACAD::MACINTYRE.


	Thanks........................Karen

    My son is in his second year at Montosorri. We are well pleased with 
    it. I have no comparison against other pre-schools however.
    
    Jeff

    Anyone know anything about the Montessori School in Auburn, NH
    (Manchester area)?  
    
    Are these typically school hour schools or an all-day thing?  How about
    summers?  Can you claim a Montessori School under dependant care
    reimbursements in the U.S./New Hampshire?
    
    Any comments would be appreciated.
    
    Thanks,
    
    Donna
    

Because one cannot make negative comments about a business in notes,
I have substituted "a Montessori school" for the actual name of the
school.  What follows may not, in fact, apply to *all* Montessori
schools; they do vary.

Here's some feedback about "a Montessori school", for anyone else who 
may be interested in it.

After much deliberation, we sent our son there this year.  After
much more deliberation, we decided that today (Oct 21) will be his 
last day, after attending for about a month.  Next week he starts 
at the locak public school.  It has become painfully clear that
at least in his (and our) case it was a huge mistake.  I must
stress that what follows is *our* impressions of *our* experience;
other people seem to love the place, and for other kids it might
work well.

Our son loves to fantisize and imagine; "a Montessori school" doesn't 
seem to believe in fantasy for kids.

Our son is exuberant! and lively, bubbling over with his feelings of joy 
(or sorrow).  "a Montessori school" doesn't seem to approve of bubbling with 
feelings.  David got put into timeout for jumping up and down because 
he was happy.  In the month he's been going there, he's been put into
at least 5 timeouts indoors and several more outdoors.  He went to
another preschool for two years and was put in a timeout exactly once.
His previous teachers thought he was great and in no way a behavior
problem.  

Being an exuberant, lively kid, he needs plenty of chances to get
out and run; "a Montessori school" doesn't seem to consider physical activity
particularly important for kids.  On occasion, recess was minimal or
completely lacking in a 9:am to 3:30 pm day.

As concerned parents, we want to be in a partnership with the school
and our son's teachers; we got the feeling that "a Montessori school" 
thinks parental involvement should end at the school door.

We think "a Montessori school" is incredibly rule-bound.  We got the feeling 
there is one way (their way) to do everything.  Any variation does
not seem to be encouraged.  They talk about allowing children to 
explore what interests them, but apparently the children must do 
the exploring only the approved Montessori way.  No innovation.

Kids can't bring chocolate in their lunches, but nothing else is
prohibited, so a kid can't bring Mom's homemade chocolate chip
cookies in his lunch but can bring Hostess Twinkies every day.
That seems to us to be totally silly.

The kids can't have backpacks, but they can have an offical "a Montessori
school" bag (which they can't bring home - it stays there) to keep
a change of clothes in.  All the "a Montessori school" bags match, of 
course, and apparently that's very important.

David came home and told us there were two gangs (he called them
"teams") who, when they did get to go out for recess, would chase
each other and try to hit each other and knock each other down.
That did not sound like a thing that ought to be ignored, so we
talked to David about ways of stopping it, what the benefits
would be of stopping it, and ways people might get together and
talk about it.  David went in and told his teacher he wanted to
have a meeting of the two teams and work out a way to stop fighting
(this from a 5-year-old!).  From what we could determine, the 
teachers didn't even know about the gangs and the fighting.  

They did have a meeting, but not of the two teams; they got everybody 
together and talked about "appropriate behavior" and rules 
(more rules!).  So we don't think they really did anything to 
help any of the kids learn how to settle differences by talking 
and negotiation, which is what David was trying to do.  My wife 
wrote a 2-page note to his teacher explaining all this and said 
David still wanted to have his meeting, and sent it in with David 
in the morning.  When she picked him up in the afternoon the teacher 
said, "I read your note.  We didn't get to it today...but we did 
learn a new painting technique!"  From that we got the message that 
new painting techniques matter more at "a Montessori school" than 
teaching kids how to settle differences and get along.  

That was really the last straw for us.  We feel that socialization 
skills are one of the most important aspects of early schooling, 
and we feel it's totally ignored at "a Montessori school". Well, maybe not 
ignored.  From what we can see, their way of getting "appropriate 
behavoir" is to pile on a gazillion rules instead of teaching the 
kids the "how" and "why"; then, because of the overabundance of 
rules, they necessarily get enforced in a somewhat inconsistent 
and arbitrary way, which is not a good thing for a kid to experience.

A friend of my wife's talked to a friend of hers, who is a child
psychologist.  She sent her first daughter to "a Montessori school" for a
year and said (from the point of view of a child psychologist) it 
was the biggest mistake she ever made with her daughter.  They do things
(she said) that are psychologically harmful to children.  We would
agree.  

We met with the school director yesterday to tell her we were
withdrawing David and that Friday (today) would be his last day.
She didn't seem to care one way or the other.  She didn't ask for
feedback.  We got the message, "We're the way we are.  If you
want to come here and play by our rules, fine.  If you don't,
that's okay too.  We don't care."

So that is our experience with "a Montessori school" and the "Montessori 
method."
I think "a Montessori school" appeals to adults because it's intellectual 
and orderly and "nice,", but I think (now) it's totally inappropriate 
for kids (at least some kids).
I stress again that it is our impressions of our experience, and
with another child and/or another school, the experience might be
totally different.  Your mileage may vary.
    

    re: .21
    
    Reading it over, I'm tempted to go back and knock out some of
    the qualifiers.  I think I may have given the place too much
    benefit of the doubt.
    

    re.21,.22
    
    Reading .21, I'm tempted to say that "a Montessori school" is flying
    false colours! What you describe doesn't reflect the central principles
    of Maria Montessori's "method."
    
    When I was a teacher's aide [when I was in college 20 yrs ago] in
    "another Montessori school" creativity and fantasy and individual
    styles of interaction and learning were highly prized; and the worst sin
    that we could commit was to promote orthodoxy at the expense of the
    individual.
    
    5 years ago, my niece [now 8] began attending Montessori pre-school
    and continued through 1st grade. Although she was taught to modify her
    exhibits of rage, none of her exuberance was stifled. It was a very
    creative environment in which the school all but _required_ other
    family members' involvement in the learning experience and
    socialisation.
    
    That being said, not all children thrive in such schools. I encountered
    some that required more structure by their very nature than the school
    where I was an aide was inclined to put in place.
    
      Annie

    re: .23
    
    I don't know much about the central principles of Maria Montessori's
    method, but from the little I do know, it did seem to me that this
    place has wrapped an incredible amount of totally irrelevant 
    rule-bound neurotic baggage around some pretty good teaching concepts.
    
    Our son in fact was doing quite well there, all things considered,
    and he seemed to be learning a lot in the "work" part of the class.
    But the rest of it...!
    
    Another anecdote.  This place accepts kids from the age of 2 years, 9
    months.  By law, kids that young must have a rest/nap time during the
    day.  This place prohibits kids from bringing a favorite blanket or
    "stuffie" for nap time!  From what I've heard about early childhood
    development, those sorts of "transitional objects" are *really*
    important in the development of some kids.  They need to have them.
    Yet, this place has decided they are somehow "bad" and prohibits them!
    It wasn't an issue with our son because he's older and he never 
    particularly had a transitional object anyway.  But some kids have
    them, and really need them.  If you go to "a Montessori school,"
    too bad!  
    
    I have trouble believing that taking a favorite stuffie away from 
    a 2-year-old was part of Maria Montessori's original vision.

    
    I looked at a Montessori school when deciding on preschool for my
    oldest son - this was around 2 years ago.  I wanted to check into
    this particular school because of the scholastic results I'd
    seen in a child who attended/attends the same school.
    
    Within a few minutes of observing the class, I was certain that this
    was not the appropriate school for my son.  While I didn't see anything
    quite as drastic as Steve describes, it did strike me as "odd" that
    the class of approx. 12-13 three to four year olds was absolutely
    SILENT in their play.   I didn't see anyway that my child - an 
    "exuberant" little boy similar to the son Steve describes - would fit
    into this environment.   Sure, they were doing neat puzzles and 
    pouring water from one cup to another, AND putting away each activity/
    rolling up their mat before starting in on something else - but it just
    didn't strike me that they were having FUN (which is what I think 
    school should *mostly* be for 3-4 year olds).  I was equally struck
    by one little wide-eyed girl that looked terribly out of place - she
    looked at me with this expression that just shouted "Please get me 
    out of here...".   Interesting thing, I ran into this same child at
    the preschool Jason ended up attending the next year....looking far
    more content.
    
    Since I know one child that seems to thrive in the Montessori
    environment, my guess is that it just works wonderfully for some
    and is not a good fit for others.   I went with my gut on this 
    decision (despite "pressure" from my babysitter as to how great
    Montessori is...) and I'm glad I did.
    
    cj/ 

Anyone know of a Montessori school in the Boston area, preferably within 
Rt 128, that teaches French to pre-schoolers.

I know Ecole bilangue in Arlington has some level of French, its not a 
Montessori and I'm not sure if they take pre-schoolers. Anyway, its too 
expensive for me.

I mainly interested in any experience people have with such a school.

    I think there is a Montessori school in Beverly, MA., but I have no
    first hand knowledge their program, and I do not know the exact
    name of the school, either.
    
    Try calling the city numbers to see if you could get a lead to the
    school.
    
    Regards,
    Lorraine

    
    Well I found 2 Montessori schools, one in Lexington and one in
    Cambridge. Both tecah SPanish as a second language - not what I needed.
    
    However, the cost amazed me, its more expensive than Ecole Bilangue,
    half days (or 5 hrs) is about $6k per year, fulltime is about $8k per
    year.
    
    I was very surprised, but then, with the cost of Daycare in general
    in New England, I guess I shouldn't have been.

There is a Montessori school in Acton at the Episcopal (I think) Church on
Newtown Road.  Also, I think there may be one in Sudbury.  I don't know if you
want to go out that far, and I don't know if they teach a second language or,
if so, what it is.

    
    I'd like to enter a note to recommend the Amherst Montessori School in
    Amherst NH.  This is my daughter's first year at this school (her first
    year of preschool) and she loves it.  The teachers are excellent...very
    caring.  This school is currently taking enrollment for the next 97-98
    school year.  My daughter is in the afternoon class which is 3 days a
    week (Tues. - Thurs.) from 12:30 to 3:30.  Next year, I have requested
    the morning class (there are 2 morning classes) which are 5 days a
    week.  The school also brings in an external consultant to teach the
    children computer skills.
    
    If anyone would like more information, please feel free to ask.
    
    -Ellen Batbouta