| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 53.1 | therapy? | WMOIS::DIPASQUALE_S | | Wed Apr 22 1992 11:28 | 18 |
| I have had somewhat of the same type of situation with my daughter, and
I have found that no matter how hard you try to get the child to open
up, you may not be asking the right questions, or asking them in a way
that they can understand. You may feel what you are doing is the best
way, but sometimes we are just to close to be able to stand back and
look at it in a removed type of way.
I brought my daughter to see a therapist at the age of five and was
stunned at the ease in which she got my daughter to open up.
Her techniques were so natural and at ease. I was saying to myself "Why
didn't I think of that?"
I guess my point is as much as you love your children sometimes we as
parents can't always find the solutions and that we need help, and that
its OK to need help.
Good Luck.
Sherry
I
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| 53.2 | | PROSE::BLACHEK | | Wed Apr 22 1992 12:40 | 11 |
| There also must be books that deal with this subject. I'd go to a good
children's bookstore and ask a clerk to help. If you live near
Southern New Hampshire, Book Nooks and Crannies in Pennichuck Square in
Nashua would be a good one.
If the store doesn't have a book, they should be able to order one.
I really feel for you. Both your son and your father must feel
abandoned.
judy
|
| 53.3 | | FDCV07::HSCOTT | Lynn Hanley-Scott | Wed Apr 22 1992 16:31 | 9 |
| Often kids can't articulate in words what's going on, but they
can/might in drawings. Perhaps suggesting that your child try drawing a
picture for Granpa, or OF Granpa......
Another thing I do sometimes is make up a story about something similar
to what I think is going on, and see if that elicits any comments.
best of luck,
|
| 53.4 | use a play situation | TNPUBS::STEINHART | Laura | Thu Apr 23 1992 09:02 | 4 |
| You could try using stuffed animals or dolls to play out a similar
situation, in which the little child visits his sick Grampy. Your son
may more readily express his feelings indirectly through a doll. (This
is a common technique used by child psychologists.)
|
| 53.5 | contact local rehabs for support | AKOCOA::TRIPP | | Thu Apr 23 1992 10:21 | 25 |
| You said grampa is at home now in "new england", from that I can't tell
exactly where, but I do have personal knowledge that there are several
rehabilitation centers in MA with Stroke support groups for families,
many of these have groups just geared to children. Also check with
your local visiting nurses, the Worcester VNA has a stroke (and an
alzheimers as well) support group for families, as does Umass medical
in Worcester. The rehabs I can think of off-hand are Spaulding rehav
in Boston, New England rehab in Woburn, (I think it's called) Shaunessy
rehab in Salem MA, and Whittier rehab in Haverhill MA.
Umass medical has a psycologist which deals with children in trauma,
and is very good at getting kids to talk about what's bugging them.
You might try one of those "breakfast table" type conversations over a
bowl of whatever some morning when you're not too rushed.
Most of these groups are free of charge, and have had great results.
Perhaps whatever agency or hospital he is dealing with has some kind of
support group.
Good luck, my mother had her first of many strokes at 49, and another
the next year 3 months before my wedding, it was a real emotional
rollercoaster until we finally lost her 7 years ago.
Lyn
|
| 53.6 | Wait until he is ready to talk about it | MAYES::SKOWRONEK | | Thu Apr 23 1992 13:21 | 17 |
| Every child handles stress (yes, this is a stress situation)
differently. The only advise I can say to you is just to let your son
know that you are there for him if and when he needs to talk. Your son
will talk to you, but wait until he is ready to talk, don't pressure
him into talking about something, that maybe he just isn't ready to
talk about. I lost my mother last summer, and my daughter was
extremely close to her. My daughter dealth with my mother's death
extremely well for a child. I talked to her alot, and she knew that
the door was open if she ever wanted to talk about Gram, and she does.
At the weirdest moments, she will bring up Gram, but she does it when
she wants to, not when I do.
Just my 2 cents.
Debby
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