Conference moira::naturism

413.0. "Not a big thing?" by MOIRA::FAIMAN (light upon the figured leaf) Thu May 20 1993 10:00

I've reproduced this from the Internet CO Digest mailing list.

	-Neil

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(From Online Naturist Club forum on Delphi)  reissued with permission
7232 17-MAY 22:21 New Members
     no surprises?
     From: NATURIST     To: ALL

     In the early '70's, as a new college graduate with a wife & young daughter,
I got interested in the "intentional community" movement (that's hippy farms to
you).  With some friends, we made a road trip to a big weekend conference at
Twin Oaks Community.  My wife, Betty, 4 year old daughter, and our friend Pam
rode together.  At this point, we were all pretty much standard, middle-American
white kids.
     Part of the deal at Twin Oaks was that conference attendees were assigned
jobs helping with the conference.  Five or six hundred folks generate some work.
Some folks got KP, some child-care, but because I had a current Life Saving
Certificate, my "job" was to serve as lifeguard down at the swimming hole on the
river for a couple hours the next day.  Since the time was sandwiched between
two seminars I really wanted to attend, I scouted out the locations of
everything in advance...and was surprised to discover that the swimmin' hole was
a skinny-dipping hole!  So I had some warning, when my turn to work came the
next day.
     I was a bit anxious when I disrobed for my shift, never having been
socially naked before, but got over it pretty quickly, since nobody seemed to
pay any attention.  I did my shift, and went on about the conference.
     It was only much later, after I actually became a hippy, that I came to
realize that one of the games played with "visitors" was to spring social nudity
on 'em as much by surprise as possible, and watch their reactions.
     I recall worrying a bit between my discovery of the nature of the place I
was supposed to guard, and the actual "moment of truth."  Would I be able to do
it?  Would I be embarrassed by an erection?  Would everyone greet sight of me
with a chorus of "put 'em back on?"  I also remember taking a deep breath with
my hands on my drawers before stepping out of them.  At the time _I_ thought I
played it pretty cool, that no one even noticed the hesitation. Later I
concluded I had probably entertained a dozen or so folks, though not for long,
as part of the "game."
     I have since concluded that we naturists do everyone, including ourselves
a dis-service by making such a big deal out of warning folks in advance, asking
if they mind, etc.  When we invite friends to go along, we should just drop it
on 'em when they get there: "oh, by the way, we don't bother much with clothes
here...."  Warned in advance, they have the chance to imagine all sorts of
problems and complications for themselves.  They manufacture fears and make it
far harder than it need be.  We contribute to it by making like it is a big deal
or something, when it is the most natural thing in the world.
     Notice that I DO advocate being pretty sure of the friend before I invite
them to come along in the first place.  I have certain friends whom I will leave
OUT of some of my plans.  But since my family is very open about our activities,
anybody who gets an invitation to join us in some outing or other is going to be
both "cool" and relatively accepting.  They may decline joining us nude, but
they won't likely freak out, either.
     Case in point: a friend we'll call Anne, whom we met through church.  We
had invited her out to the farm for a bar-b-que on Saturday.  She called up
Friday evening with news that her husband, from whom she is separated, had just
called and wanted to take her to dinner instead to talk out some things, and
would Sunday be OK instead.  Well, we had invited a bunch of nudist friends over
for a clothing-optional "do" Sunday, but what the heck, sure, Anne, c'mon over.
I didn't tell HER that.  I just said, ok, no problem, we'll see you at 4:30.
     There was a bit of a look of surprise on her face when she arrived and saw
half a dozen naked people.  And whether it was because it was starting to get
too cool to be nude, or what, she stayed dressed as first one, then another of
us put on clothes through the evening.  The next Sunday at church, she asked
about the bridge we had been building, and I said it was now complete.  And she
asked to come see it some time.  Hardly the request of someone grossed out.
     We have introduced other friends to social nudity, first as "hippy farmers,
" and later as yuppies.  Nearly always by surprise.  _Always_ as a no-big-deal
occurence in the way we live.  NEVER have we lost a friend.  And I suspect that
if we had, they weren't really friends in the first place.
     So my question is this:  shouldn't we begin actually behaving as though
being nude were the normal, natural thing we have been claiming it is? Shouldn't
we cease creating problems for ourselves by making a big deal out of being
somewhere nude?  And shouldn't we introduce our friends to social nudity the
very same way we might introduce 'em to a new board game, or show 'em our new
kitchen cabinets?  Casually, almost absent mindedly?  No big deal?

--Michael--