Conference misery::feline

    The most any of mine ever learned was to not GET CAUGHT on the kitchen
    table.  Melody, the coon kitten, still forgets this sometimes, and
    gets hollered at.  I think all of my cats knew from birth that they are
    the true queens of the household (all female cats, around my place) and
    that the human slaves who put out the food water and water, supply
    toys, and clean the cat boxes, are to be humored at best!  They all
    eventually leanred not to get caught when performing mischief, but if
    there was a vase of flowers which included babies' breath, especially,
    or ferns on the table, when Nebula was still alive you could count on
    finding little kitty prints near it as the ferns slowly vanished and
    the white bb flowers got scattered around the table...
    
    /Charlotte

    I think that you can avoid your worries if you by some of the anti-
    bacterial cleaning supplies and wipe down you table before you eat. I
    have tried to keep my cat off the counters and tables (without much
    luck) and its just easier to wash the table/counters down before using
    them.

  Personally, I'd abandon all hope of changing this behavior.  One of our
kitties has claimed the table as hers; three of the others, the kitchen 
counter where I prepare food.  Other than wiping it down, there's really not
much you can do.  I doubt that it's unsanitary; I've never gotten sick from
one of my cats (now people, on the other hand....).  I do try to minimize
the amount of cat hair that makes it's way into the food mostly for the "ugh!" 
factor than anything else.  Our philosophy is: we sleep with kitty butts in 
our face, so why worry about anything else they touch?

			SQ

    This is a pet peeve of mine too.  I can count on one hand
    the number of times I found evidence of Andie being on my
    counter or table over the first 3 years we've been together.
      Since I moved 3 months ago, she's been
    laying on the kitchen table on a regular basis.  She knows
    she's not supposed to.  I've put down aluminum foil and we
    find tiny kitty feet prints in the foil!  I put plastic
    bowls around the table and we find them on the floor.
    
    This urks me too, but in the end, its a losing battle.
    She is getting better at not getting caught too.  Its when
    my SO finds the bowls on the floor...
    
    She's cleaner than most people I know, so I don't worry 
    about getting sick.  I just don't think animals belong on
    counters/tables.  Like was said earlier, I kiss her on
    the lips, so I don't worry about her being dirty...;-)))
    
    Love those kitty kisses!
    
    Judie
    
    

    How about using a tablecloth?  That's what I did after one of my cats
    dug his claws into the brand new oak table top.....and I make sure
    there is a heavy centerpiece on the table. 

>    How about using a tablecloth?  That's what I did after one of my cats
>    dug his claws into the brand new oak table top.....and I make sure
>    there is a heavy centerpiece on the table. 

oh noooo!!!  I've tried this one -- ended up with EVERYTHING on the floor.
Kitty strength in the front legs is downright awsome.  We do use placemats; 
for some reason the cats don't have a burning desire to throw them on the 
floor.  Of course, this still doesn't keep them OFF the table.  And, just a
side thought, I've noticed they like to sleep on the table/counter/hearth more 
in the summer when it's hot.  I'm sure it's lots cooler than sleeping on the 
carpet or upholstered furniture.

			SQ

    Kitty on tables and counters...easy,  harmless, no scolding
    rememdy................do you have a squirt bottle? Fill it with water
    and when catch the kitty in the act...squirt him on the head..they hate
    it and it's much better than yelling or spanking. BUT..if the kitty has
    been doing this for years.....forget it! Kittens are easy if you start
    it then. It's really not cruel. The older kitty's would get mad and not
    speak to you for weeks!  Have fun and good luck, try it and let me know
    if it works.
    				Katy :)

	Our 2 cats started doing this when it got real hot. Seeing it is a
glass table and all, they found it much cooler to lay on. Maybe you could get a
thick piece of glass for them (at least 1" thick) so they would have it to lay
on..... oh yeah.... these are cats.... if you buy something FOR them, they
don't go near it. ;-)


Glen

    RE .8
    
    Now Glen,
    
    I don't see you stating that you bought your kittys their very own
    piece of glass to lay on.....
    
    I too, have a glass table and there are times that 4 out of the 7 are
    on the table at the same time.  
    
    I tried for years to stop this habit.  I used all the tatics listed
    here to no avail.  I even tried putting nasty-smelling stuff on the
    table.  I have given up.  Now we sit in the living room and use the
    trays.  When we have company, I clean off the table (real good) before
    the guests arrive.  Kittys are usually *not around* while guests are
    there so that works for me.
    
    Thank goodness we are both kitty lovers.  We both enjoy having a kitty
    sitting with us while we enjoy our morning coffee and look out the
    window at the birds.
    
    Good luck in your endeavors.
    
    Sandi and the Notorious 7
      Thunder, Lightning, DejaVu.. Patches, Shadow and Silver.  And don't
      forget - Diamond 2.
    

    The only time Tigger lies on the dining room table is if we have the
    lamp on, then he likes to lie under it.  Otherwise, the only other
    times he is on the table is to walk across it to get to the printer so
    he can look out the window at the birds, squirrels at/under the bird
    feeder.  I, too, tried various methods, and finally just gave up.
    
    They WILL have things done their own way!!  I was away for the weekend
    and came across a little ceramic sign that said, "Cats like obedient
    people".  I guess that's true.
    
    Marilyn

    
    That squirt bottle is my best friend.  I've used it for my kitchen
    table to -- and it works.  Everytime you see Oscar up there - give him
    a squirt.  He'll start to think twice about being up there.
    
    I did the same thing w/my horse -- he was not on my table -- but he
    rears -- I filled up the ol' balloon and popped him on the head w/it and
    worked!  - but from time to time - you'll need to re introduce the
    squirt bottle :-) - as I do w/the balloon.
    
    Good luck
    
    Lou

    
    Hi,
    
    Try this method in addition to the squirt bottle and it will work
    (most/some) of the time, at least when you are home!  :0  (how is that
    for a disclaimer?)
    
    My 3 beloved owners are not supposed to be on the counters or tables in
    kitchen or dining room.  So of course, when I am not home (to weild
    squirt bottle) I leave a bottle pointing from the most likely direction
    of cat assault.  
    
    Also, get some nice flat cookie sheets with edges all
    around, (like a jelly roll pan) fill them with water and leave them on
    the surfaces that are supposed to remain catless.  Even CinnyMan, who
    loves to take a shower with me (really) does not like to get his feet
    wet when jumping up on to a kitchen surface.  And with a large flat pan
    with water in it they are NOT going to stay to lay around and sleep, or
    even sit for a while to watch the birds!
    
    Good Luck and let us know how you made out!
    
    Feline helpful,
    
    Sue & Princess Panther Jane, Spots, and the CinnyMan
      

	Sandi..... my roomate did that for them.... it is called a diningroom
table... :-)  (the table is a slab of glass held up by 4 pillars)


Glen

    I definitely agree with SQ (.3) about sleeping with kitty butts in our
    faces.  Heck, you eat a peck of dirt before you die... including kitty
    cooties.
    
    As far as tablecloths go: not when you have a brainless/fearless
    purrsonality combination to deal with (like my Veto's)!  Picture a
    powerful leap from 4 feet away onto a slippery table covered with a
    cloth.  Not covered for long!--cat, cloth and surface clutter all on
    the floor in one fluid motion.
    
    Again with Veto, the spray bottle causes more problems than it solves. 
    He's such a dim bulb that he really doesn't remember, for instance,
    that the table is officially off limits.  So it shocks the stuffing out
    of him to be sprayed "for no apparent reason" and he runs in place for
    a second or two (audio: Hanna-Barbera bongos!) before rupturing off the
    table.  That mad scramble with his (clawed) back feet knocks stuff over
    and scratches the table.
    
    And what *is* it about baby's breath?  Skrufy (who is a gentleman and a
    scholar, and *knows* the rule about tables) cannot resist it.  I'd
    allow him this one vice except that it makes him barf, and he will only
    barf *on rugs*.
    
    Sigh,
    Leslie                                                 

    
    Hanna-Barbera bongos!  I love it!
    
    Thanks for the laugh.

    Squirting water on her doesn't work on Melody - she's a Maine coone cat
    kitten, and she LIKES water.  She is smart enough to be learning not to
    get caught misbehaving, though.  Our wooden table is not especially
    slippery, but even so Melody manages to sometimes send the placemats
    flying - I wouldn't even bother trying a tablecloth; she'd probably try
    climbing it.  I keep telling old JFCL, the dowager empress of the
    household at 17+, to teach Melody a few things, such as how to produce
    a purr that sounds like a purr, but she disdains.
    
    /Charlotte

    I've had more giggles reading this string.... the sleeping with kitty
    butt in the face certainly was priceless, even got my husband going and
    the hanna-barbara bongos was another. I've seen ours do that on the
    linoleum and it's still a treat to watch. 
    
    Our cats use the dining room table to lay on, when we are not around. I
    know because they haven't been clever enough to not move the table
    runner. Cat fur on the table doesn't mean anything, there's fur all
    over anyway. My solution.... I don't put anything of value on the table
    and I clean it very well before we use it. the kitchen table is less of
    a problem because it's never uncovered enough (our junk) for there to
    be adequate space.
    
    I don't have any suggestions other than what's already been said. A
    table cloth (with something very heavy holding it down) might be you're
    best bet!
    
    janetb.

    The tablecloth does work in my situation.  I placed a HEAVY centerpiece
    so that the tablecloth doesn't move.  I also have various other objects 
    on the table, pens, paper, mail etc. which inevitably land on the
    floor...but the tablecloth and heavy centerpiece are still on the
    table.
    
    There is also a spray available through pet stores.  I think it's
    called "Keep away" may not work on table surface but may be more
    appropriate for rugs and alphostery.