Conference misery::feline

400.0. "A TRIBUTE TO JAMIE" by IAMOK::LOCKHART () Thu Sep 24 1992 06:54

    My friend Marilyn has been writing for me, but now it's time for me to
    join this wonderful feline-lover's family.  In response to my Jamie's
    death Monday I received several understanding, supportive replies. 
    Jamie was a stray tabby who adopted my daughter, a student at Syracuse. 
    In taking him for his shots, he was diagnosed as having FelV.  She kept
    him till this summer when she came to stay with me for a month.  I also
    have a 13-year-old tabby, Nick, who we confined to the cellar/on the
    deck to keep the two from contact.  It worked well - they seemed to
    become friends, mirroring each other's positions and sniffing without
    snarling.
    
    Marni went back to school, leaving Jamie with me until she could find
    him a home (her new apt. didn't allow pets).  Meanwhile I got so
    attached to J. I didn't think I could give him up.  He had a much more
    loving, affectionate nature than N.  Although J. has occasional
    diarrhea, he had no symptoms of his disease until last Sat. when he had
    diarrhea, vomiting, a fever, unable to eat, etc.  On Mon. I took him to
    the vet's.  They said there was little they could do for him, but give
    him an IV for fluids.  There he was in quarantine, miserable and alone. 
    They said he'd probably improve for a while, then the symptoms would
    return again and again.
    
    I knew what I had to do, but I had to get Marni's permission.  I called
    her (crying my eyes out) to suggest J. be put to sleep.  I gave her
    time to think about it and talk to the vet herself.  She agreed and I
    went to the vet's right after work. It was truly one of the most
    difficult things I've had to do in my life, but I stayed with him until
    the end, talking to him, assuring him he was going to a place where he
    would be at peace and not be sick any more.  I showed him a photo of
    his Mama Marni and told J. she and I loved him very much.
    
    My daughter (who is the S.O. in my life - I was divorced from her
    father and widowed 11 years ago when my second husband died of a sudden
    death heart attack) has reassured me she would have done exactly what I
    did.  Although she initially wanted me to wait till the weekend so she
    could say goodbye (you can see why she'd have issues about this), she
    knew what was done was in Jamie's best interests.
    
    What I've been doing since is cleaning the house so that N. can return
    full time to it and talking to him in the same loving tone/with
    affectionate terms I used with Jamie.  I thought Nick was an
    independent, unfeeling kind of guy, but he responds and it shows me
    what a gift J. was: that his spirit/soul will never die - it's in me,
    my daughter and my Nick.
    
    Thank you all for being there for me - I look forward to future
    connections to you.  With gratitude, Lynne
    

    Lynne,
    Thank you for writing.  It was a wonderful note and I am glad to hear
    that you have Nick to keep you busy and company.
    Karen +13

    
    Having just gone through the loss of my baby, Ebony, last Friday, I
    know EXACTLY what you're going through.
    
    Rest assured, he knows he was loved and you did what you did because of
    that love.
    
    My condolences for your loss.
    
    Barbara
    

    Thank you for writing about Jamie.  I may have to face this same
    unhappy situation with my Nicodemus.  We're not sure what is wrong with
    him, but it may be FELV and I feel I must prepare myself for the worst. 
    Reading notes like yours helps me to come to terms with what I may have
    to face in the future.
    
    I'm so sorry about Jamie.  Just remember that he had a wonderful, love-
    filled life and now he is in a peaceful, pain-free place.
    
    My condolences to you and your daughter,
    Michelle

    Barbara,
    
    I know you from working for Hank Tarbi a couple of years ago.  I'm
    back as a temp. in U.S. Benefits.  Thanks so much for your support.
    I'm also sorry to hear about your Ebony.  Do you plan on getting
    another cat?  I'm so glad I have my old faithful Nick to go home to.
    I was missing Jamie extra this AM when my daughter called...I think
    we're psychically connected.  Just what I needed.  Take care, Lynne

    Michelle,
    
    You mentioned that your Nicodemus may have FelV; I'd suggest you have
    the test done (it's a simple blood test).  What I've heard is even if
    a cat tests positive, they should be re-tested 2-3 months later, as
    they may slough off the virus.  We had Jamie tested in 9/91, 12/91
    and even 8/92 (maybe a case of denial, but I wanted to believe he
    could be an exception).  The disease seems a lot more like AIDS than
    cancer i.e. their immune systems are attacked and they are susceptible
    to all kinds of other problems.  Sometimes they get tumors, but not
    necessarily.  In any event, let me know how he's doing and call/write
    me off line if you'd like: 223-6234/IAMOK::LOCKHART.  Peace, Lynne

    Lynne,
    
    My condolences on losing Jamie. May he live in your heart forever.
    
    ng

    
    Yeah, Lynne, I thought your name sounded familiar...welcome back!
    
    I do have another furface named Ivory, but it's still not the same
    without my 'matched set' ... Ebony was such a personality and I miss
    him terribly.  I have been *thinking* of getting a kitten ... NOT to
    replace Eb, but rather to give me another friend to love and Ivory 
    a brother/sister.....she's been so lonely without Eb.
    
    Take care,
    Barbara