Conference misery::feline

    It might be possesiviness...but before she makes any moves I feel
    a vet visit is in order.  My Barkley got very nasty to me and
    my other cats when he had an abscess.  Abscesses can be very 
    painful and make the cat very upset...which I'm sure would also
    be the case if the cat is sick in anyway!  
    
    I do understand her concern for her daughter...but I truly hope
    she gives the cat a chance and has him medically checked over first.
    It is just funny that for a cat of 13 years to become aggresive;
    especially since he wasn't aggressive when the child was first
    brought home 14 months ago.
    
    Wish her luck....and keep us posted.
    
    Sandy
    

    1st: vet as in -1.
    2nd: much love, very much, in direction cat. Maybe jelous.
    3rd: NOT let little girl be afraid. Try to make her understand cat
    friend, no enemy. Try make understand cat too, little girl IS at home
    here, as cat is. I cross my paws for you.
    
    Smokey

    My opinion - definitely a jealousy factor at work here.
    
    Perhaps by the three of them sitting/playing together, having
    the new child feed the green-eyed kitty treats (yes, bribery),
    the poor furface won't feel so left out.  Of course, Mom's to
    blame for all this (the chomp on the arm should be a good
    indicator) - so she needs to provide special attention to Mr.
    Kitty while the little one's not around from time to time.
    They never outgrow the "I was here first" syndrome - it's been
    a couple of years and I still have to treat Mittens with "kit"
    gloves!
    
    C.
    

    Is there a place where the cat can take refuge from the walking
    toddler?  The baby may be inadvertantly hurting the cat, and the lack
    of security could be contributing to this.
       

    Yep, the cat has his own room. She's been making sure that she's there
    when the cat is, so the baby is not abusing the cat -- the baby's a
    little afraid of her, since the 'attacking' started.
    
    My friend is going to take the cat (his name is Benson) to the vet, and
    see if he's feeling well. She seems to think its' jealousy, too!
    
    Thanks for your help!
    Cheryl

    
    So after losing Dorking (he hasn't come back yet at any rate - probably
    won't now, poor thing), my wife went down to the pound, found what
    appeared to be an affectionate cat that we have named 'Farnham'. It's
    about a year old or so. Anyway, as soon as Farnham gets into the house,
    he scratches my wife's daughter's toddler's eye. Not too serious, but
    now we have doubts. Do you think he might respond to some kindness,
    being a bit traumatized? Dorking never did anything like that. I don't
    believe in declawing, so that's not an option. You think we'd better
    take him back? After all, little Jamie visits every 2 weeks or so.
    is this a 'catastrophe', or something he can get over? 
    

    Lucky Farnham to have a new home.  But he's probably freaked
    out because he doesn't know what's going on.  Besides being in a
    strange place (before I forget, he should be kept indoors for a
    couple of weeks so he knows where his new home is before you let him
    outside, otherwise he's likely to get lost), with strange people
    and strange noises, a small animal named Jamie probably pulled his tail
    or some such.  I'm sure Farnham will settle down;  it may take some weeks. 
    Until things settle down, I'd monitor him when Jamie is around so they
    don't damage each other.
    
    You will probably find that once Farnham adjusts, he'll give Jamie
    a wide berth until Jamie is older.
    
    I'm so glad you've taken in another cat who needs you.
    

    Chris, please don't give up on Dorking yet.  You never know - the mog
    might just be giving you a run for your money.  Let's hope Dorking
    returns and likes the company of Farnham.  :^)

    
    I haven't given up on him, Cheryl. We're hoping he comes back. Magnolia
    point is a mini-peninsular, surrounded by the ocean on 3 sides. It
    isn't that easy to get out of the immediate area and by now everyone
    must know Dorking is AWOL. Unless one of the summer people took a shine
    to the old boy and carted him off to Jersey or someplace, he MUST
    be around somewhere. Perhaps at this very minute he is up to his old
    sleeping-around tricks (tho' he has never been gone for so long before,
    and he was a lot younger then and could actually hear). Or of course he
    could be lying dead somewhere. We've put an ad in the paper, notices
    etc. 
    
    Meanwhile, Farnham is great - he bites a bit, but only in fun. And
    after a half hour this morning in Brighams with Jamie, waiting for the
    garage to stick some tires on mum's car, I can understand how Farnham 
    could get annoyed with him.
    
    Thanks for the kind words. Cat people are simply the best people!
    

    Just a quick say about cats around kids. We have 2 adult, neutered male
    cats - between 4 and 6 years old. All their lives they have only had to
    put up/tolerate us two humble peasants who pay the bills for cats'
    house and they have us well trained.
    
    Until this past spring when relatives came to visit with the 2 kids.
    Both cats weren't sure what to do, one hid, the other try to scratch
    (and suceeded twice) anything under 3 feet that came his way.  We 
    seperated the cats from the kids for most of the visit. We figured this
    would have to be a way of life whenever we had little visitors (two
    legged that is).
    
    Then just recently a 4 yr. old neighbor has taken to dropping in at all
    times of the day. Usually when the cats a napping and not moving fast.
    The first time we warned the girl about the cats, but she has no fear
    of animals (has a cat in her house that is a saint). After the first
    several visits, the cats are pretty good around her. They let her pet
    them, most of the time and leave when they don't want attention.
    
    So - give both sides a chance to get to know each other and things
    usually work out.  and it sounds like it is from your last note.
    
    My fingers are still crossed for your Dorking.
    
    janetb.
    owned by Merlin and Rascal