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Conference lgp30::christian-perspective

Title:Discussions from a Christian Perspective
Notice:Prostitutes and tax collectors welcome!
Moderator:CSC32::J_CHRISTIE
Created:Mon Sep 17 1990
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1362
Total number of notes:61362

391.0. "on dynamics of shared ministry" by OLDTMR::FRANCEY (USS SECG dtn 223-5427 pko3-1/d18) Sun Jan 19 1992 00:02

    Let's say that a husband and wife are contemplating their first shared
    ministry as Ordained Pastors within the congregational type polity. 
    What are the dynamics on such an undertaking?
    
    My hopes for the expansion of this note are to generate lots of helpful
    suggestions to more fully address and to help my spouse and myself to
    make as well an informed choice as possible.
    
    We plan to be co-pastors, each with identifiable responsibilities. -
    but will the "church" always see me as "Senior" as I'm male?  How can
    we most effectively work this issue?
    
    We plan to rotate worship service responsibilites regularly and for
    each of us to participate each Sunday.
    
    What about time off?
    
    What about taxes?  Retirement? What happens with Social Security if I
    leave a much higher paying position for the ministry?  Will I (we) get
    penalized for last years of employment at a reduced rate?
    
    Who will we go to for guidance on relational problems?  Should it be 
    joint or individual sessions with a counseler?
    
    How do we preach to a theme when we each may have different viewpoints
    and/or beliefs?
    
    Is it better to have our own separate church?  Why?
    
    What are some of the experiences you noters have who have been involved
    in a pastorate?  Or who planned to but decided against the path of
    Ordained Ministry?
    
    What are some other dynamics we should consider?
    
    	Shalom,
    
    	Ron
    
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391.1CSC32::J_CHRISTIEPeace: the Final FrontierMon Jan 20 1992 18:2717
Ron,

I would suggest that your first consideration be one of the amount of time
spent in each other's company.

I love my spouse.  But, I'm not so sure I could be gainfully employed with
her.  Home is sometimes a sanctuary from work, and, let's be honest, sometimes
vice versa.  What do you do when there is no "safe" place, no way to get some
distance from your responsibilities, problems or pressures?

I would also consider how often you "act as interpreter" for each other
or "rescue" each other in conversations with a third party or in groups.
I've noticed that in most couples, one usually has a greater tendency
to fall into these nasty habits.

Peace,
Richard
391.2What we discoveredLJOHUB::NSMITHrises up with eagle wingsTue Jan 21 1992 15:1512
    We found out that in actual practice we were too competitive.  That is,
    we couldn't co-lead a small group (youth group, for example).  But once
    we learned that, we simply divided responsibilities: one took Sr. High,
    one took Jr. High, etc.  That way each of us could use our own
    leadership style freely, without any competition or "censorship"
    (whether intentional or otherwise) from the other.
    
    (Now that we're both into computer software, it's amusing to hear us
    sometimes try to "one-up-manship" each other on what's best...! :-) )
    
    
    
391.3CSC32::J_CHRISTIEPeace: the Final FrontierThu Apr 16 1992 21:477
    Ron .0,
    
    Any new insights on shared ministry that you've gained from personal
    experience?
    
    Peace,
    Richard
391.4update on shared ministryOLDTMR::FRANCEYUSS SECG dtn 223-5427 pko3-1/d18Fri Apr 17 1992 17:2440
    My spouse and I are preaching the two Sundays after Easter at the
    church in Cranston where we're members.  She is preaching April 26th
    and her sermon title is "Risk Taking".  She will be wearing my robe
    and I'll be assisting her as worship leader.
    
    I'm preaching the following Sunday, May 3rd and my sermon title is:
    "Who are you?".  This is a Communion Sunday (not using popcorn and soda
    this time :-) ), so the sermon will be a little shorter.
    
    We were asked to preach these two Sundays as our Interim Minister has
    resigned effective after Easter Sunday.
    
    My wife's sermon is finished except for events up to the moment that
    might get a late entry into the service.  My sermon is outlined and has
    been in process (reflection) for a few weeks.  We are both using the
    lectionary (year C) and would post the sermons for noters if you wish.
    
    There is other info regarding our UCC polity that has been going on for
    the past few months that has caused me many, many nights without any
    sleep at all.  I've thought about entering a base note on the subject
    but have been somewhat uneasy about it as it relates to ethics and
    polity within our denomination.  People might comment regarding how
    they view the situation but without a real understanding of UCC polity,
    comments may not be helpful.  Also, how other denominations handle the
    situation is not of real interest to me as I need to deal with my own.
    
    What it comes down to for me is that I have observed an unethical (in
    my opinion) behavior in which a pastor has taken unfair advantage of
    his position.  I can go the limit to bring this behavior before the
    Church & Ministry Committee and can be labeled as vindictive (as a
    possibility) or can "look the other way" as members of my own church
    are doing.
    
    BTW, other denominations which have less autonomy do not have this
    problem occur.
    
    	Shalom,
    
    	Ron
    
391.5CSC32::J_CHRISTIEPeace: the Final FrontierFri Apr 17 1992 17:5213
.4, Tough situation, Ron!

I think that if I were in a position to offer advice, I'd say that you
might ask yourself what you believe Jesus would have you do.  You might
also ask in prayer for the light of Divine guidance.  You might also
ask yourself what you could do that you'd be able to live with long
after the situation has passed.

I might add that it's frequently the option you makes you feel least
comfortable that needs most to be pursued.

Peace,
Richard