T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
---|
237.1 | | DEMING::VALENZA | Fornicator, and damn proud of it! | Thu May 23 1991 11:55 | 3 |
| I guess I get to sign up first.
-- Mike
|
237.2 | | SA1794::SEABURYM | Zen: It's Not What You Think | Thu May 23 1991 12:33 | 12 |
|
Elaine and I were married in a civil ceremony, so I am not sure
if I qualify or not.
However we lived together before we were married which would
certainly meet the requirements for signing up.
Then again I've never repented for previously having been a
fornicator, so I guess I still might be one.
As usual I am confused by the finer points of distinguishing
what is or is not as sin.
Mike
|
237.3 | | DPDMAI::DAWSON | A Different Light | Thu May 23 1991 12:39 | 7 |
|
In the strict intrepretation on the bible, even the thought
would make you qualify.....so.....Yup. Though any further comment
would be delving into my personal life so I'll leave it there. :^)
Dave
|
237.4 | | JURAN::SILVA | A word to ya MUTHA! | Thu May 23 1991 12:44 | 6 |
|
I am not allowed to get married, so I guess I'll always be one!
Glen
|
237.5 | | DEMING::VALENZA | Fornicator, and damn proud of it! | Thu May 23 1991 12:56 | 17 |
| Mike, I think you definitely qualify as one if you and your wife used
to live together. In my own case, I am about to become a serious
fornicator this Wednesday, when I will acquire a female roommate, to
whom I am not married (not only that, but she is a *gasp* Christian!)
I think you have raised a valid point, though, in that we probably need
an official definition of fornication. We could call it the Human
Un-sinful Manual of Practices, or HUMP for short. Whenever you wanted
to know if you were sinning or not, you could just consult the HUMP
guide. It could contain an alphabetized listing with topics like
"Breasts, Kissing", or "Whipped Cream During Foreplay"--pretty much
whatever you might need to know on the subject of human sexuality. Of
course, under "Homosexual" (pronounced, of course, like any good street
preacher would, as "Home-oh-sex-you-ell"), it would simply prohibit the
practice altogether.
-- Mike
|
237.6 | ;-) | SOLVIT::MSMITH | So, what does it all mean? | Thu May 23 1991 14:00 | 3 |
| You guys are gonna roast in.... well, you know.
Mike
|
237.7 | | CARTUN::BERGGREN | A new day for you | Thu May 23 1991 15:14 | 9 |
| Hafta admit...
I've been HUMPing (fornicating and much more 8^o ) for years now.
By all indications it's not going to change anytime soon -- unless
I receive a proposal I just *can't* refuse....
8^)
Karen
|
237.8 | Why do you bath each day, only to get dirty again... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 23 1991 15:47 | 24 |
| RE: 6
Thanks, I sure didn't want to be the first to say it, because I've
gotten jumped on, and probably still will...but even though I do and
have fornicated, it is NOTHING to be proud of. That's why I continue
to pray for forgiveness, and that God will hear me and do so, though I
may continue...a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do...but that still
doesn't make it right in the sight of God, and good for the soul that
hopes to make it to heaven or the kingdom of God.
If it weren't for the backwardness and difficult time it is to get
along with women these days, I'd marry and stay that way, but black or
white, all seem to be troubling in marriage. So occasionally, when my
chest gets too heavy I've GOT to have release, I don't hide from God,
but acknowledge him in all that I do. And I don't say just because I
know I'm gonna do it, that there's no need to ask forgiveness, because
I know that's not the point, the point is staying clean. Just like we
sweat/perspire each day, and get dirty, we still bath/shower each day,
I wouldn't EVER say that because I know I'm gonna sweat or get dirty
today it's fruitless to bath or shower! It is also written in
scripture don't stand long in sin, don't pile sin upon sin...and this
is of relevance in these matters...I'm not proud to sin.
Playtoe
|
237.9 | | JURAN::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Thu May 23 1991 16:06 | 9 |
| Playtoe, the smiley face in the title of reply 6 suggests to me that
the author was being, well, tongue in cheek, so I suspect that makes
you the first one to really say it after all.
And to all you beloved HUMPers and fornicators in this notes file, I
hereby declare today, May 23, as International Fornicator Pride Day, in
your (and my) honor.
-- Mike
|
237.10 | JC said that | XANADU::FLEISCHER | without vision the people perish (381-0899 ZKO3-2/T63) | Thu May 23 1991 18:18 | 9 |
| re Note 237.3 by DPDMAI::DAWSON:
> In the strict intrepretation on the bible, even the thought
> would make you qualify.....
I believe that President Jimmy Carter was recorded as saying
something to that effect.
Bob
|
237.11 | Born to be other than celibate | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | Proud Sponsor FAWoL | Thu May 23 1991 19:36 | 12 |
| Well,....I'm not sure how proud I am of it now....but, in the days before
we were married, when we were just fornicating fools, I have to confess
that I sure enjoyed it at the time.
Presently, I'm very married and as loyal as a puppy dog.
And, I have to confess, I do occassionally fantasize, but I do not dwell
in the fantasy. I realize that, regardless of this, it is still a sin
and that I am a sinner. Did I ever say I was perfect?
Peace,
Richard
|
237.12 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Thu May 23 1991 20:35 | 16 |
| Playtoe,
as I understand it, using your hand is much less of a sin, if it
one at all...( the text on Onan is, to my mind, not against
self release).
and to add to the confessions, 'the DR' and I knew each other
before our marriage, also, Richard....
and Mike, give E my love and hugs, I'm *so* glad you two found
each other... may you have many joyous times together.....
much love
Bonnie
|
237.13 | 8^) | ATSE::FLAHERTY | A K'in(dred) Spirit | Fri May 24 1991 16:49 | 7 |
| Haven't had the time (or inclination) to note here lately. But I
peeked in here today and look what I find.
Sure I'll sign up, what the heck, got nothin' better else to do...
Ro
|
237.14 | Really weird? | NYTP07::LAM | Q ��Ktl�� | Fri May 24 1991 16:58 | 3 |
| This is really getting weird....????????
%-),$-),&-),:)
|
237.15 | Consorting with self... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Fri May 24 1991 18:28 | 26 |
| Re: 12
Bonnie, I half way agree.
I have an interpretation of Isaiah 66 that gives a beautiful method of
making love without penetrating the vagina, which is the crux of the
sin of fornication (i.e. we should not "break the walls" of the vaginal
opening with no intention of procreating, the feelings that come from
penetrating intercourse create too strong emotions for the average
person to handle (and I can elaborate this. In the chapter, I perceive
it to say that the man and woman handle either, he kissing and sucking
and playing with her breasts and rubbing her clitoris (but not
penetrating the vagina, she "dandling" (i.e. makeing up and down
motion) the penis between her thighs or in her hands, thus both reach
climax, but the thought of possible pregnancy is eliminated,
procreation is a powerful force of reality.
So I agree that the "use of hands" is ok, but not upon yourself.
Actually, I reading only recently, either in Nag Hammadi or it was in
the "the pale fox" a book on Dogon religious ideas, where it calls such
self attention, "consorting with self" and it was said that this is not
good...."consorting with self" think about that.
I'll post my interpretation of Isaiah 66 next week.
Playtoe
|
237.16 | John 8:7 | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | Proud Sponsor FAWoL | Fri May 24 1991 21:43 | 3 |
| Darn!! I guess I won't get to pitch the first stone!!
Richard
|
237.17 | misinterpretation of text.... | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Fri May 24 1991 23:35 | 15 |
| Stephen,
the only thing in the entire Bible that can possibly be considered
as being against masturbation, as a sexual release, is the story
of Onan. and his 'sin' was that he with drew from sexual intercourse
with his brother's widow, with whom he was *not* married, because
he did not want to give his seed to raise a child of his seed to
be his brother's child. His sin was failure to give his brother's
widow a child, not masturbation.
Do you think that the unmarried are sinners if they masturate?
I do not.
Bonnie
|
237.18 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Fri May 24 1991 23:40 | 11 |
| and I think Onan was married....so God must condone adultery
in some situations..i.e. he was *punished* not for having
sexual relations as a married man with his brother's widow....
no, he was *supposed* to do that...
he was condemed for not making her pregnant.......
interesting, huh?
BJ
|
237.19 | ....be glad when I get my own account! | CARTUN::HAZARIKA | You have a Christian *WHAT*?! | Fri May 24 1991 23:43 | 11 |
| re: .15
Oh, *darn*! I'm scr....errrr....I'm in trouble now! (*8
Good thing I don't believe in the same God a lot of you seem to, since
I don't believe in marriage, I will never have children, I don't
believe in celibacy, and I *am* the aforementioned roommate-to-be!
E Grace_who_won't_be_staying_in_this_file
|
237.20 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Fri May 24 1991 23:49 | 14 |
| E....
wish you would, you Christian Quaker, fornicator, you, ..
love you and Mike so much...
btw, I looked up Onan, in Cruden's concordance, and there is
*no* mention of his name, or seed in reference to him, or
spilling....
guess itwas too risque to mention, in the offical lists..
sigh
Bonnie
|
237.21 | Well, what do you hear? | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Tue May 28 1991 13:54 | 32 |
| RE: 17
Bonnie, I've actually seen nothing in the scripture about
"masturbation", but I also don't see anything about a lot things which
we call by english terms....that's why God was wise in providing
"descriptive" references, "you'll know them by their fruit", rather
than by name. Anyway, here's the scripture in Isaiah I was referring
to:
Isaiah 66: 9-14
"Shall I bring to the birth, and not cause to bring forth (abortion)?
saith the Lord, shall I cause to bring forth, and shut the womb (tying
tubes/hysterectomy)? saith thy God.
Rejoice ye with Jerusalem, and be glad with her, all ye that love
her: rejoice for joy with her, all ye that mourn for her.
That ye may suck, and be satisfied with the breasts of her
consolations; that ye may milk out, and be delighted with the abundance
of her glory.
For thus saith the Lord, behold I will extend peace to her like a
river, and the glory of the Gentiles like a flowing stream; then shall
ye such, ye shall be borne upon her sides, and be dandles upon her
knees.
As one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you, and ye
shall be comforted in Jerusalem.
And when ye see this, your heart shall rejoice, and your bones
shall florish like an herb, and the HAND of the Lord shall be known
toward his servants, and his indignation toward his enemies."
Can you hear what the Spirit is saying?
Playtoe
|
237.22 | PROUD OF SIN? | CSC32::LECOMPTE | MARANATHA! | Wed May 29 1991 03:25 | 4 |
|
Last I read, we are to be REPENTANT not PROUD of sin.
_ed-
|
237.23 | | JURAN::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Wed May 29 1991 09:52 | 3 |
| If I don't consider it a sin, there is nothing to be repentant of.
-- Mike
|
237.24 | | WILLEE::FRETTS | I love this Earth!!!! | Wed May 29 1991 12:57 | 13 |
|
If every person were to open themselves up and be filled with the
full presence of God while they were having sex, I believe they
would be glorifying God....no matter what the circumstances were.
In that state, you can only love. You cannot do harm.
I read recently in a book (and I can't remember which one it was)
that if people were to have sex in this state, there would be no
need for birth control, as only those who really wanted a child
at that time would conceive. What a beautiful thought!
Carole
|
237.25 | | JURAN::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Wed May 29 1991 13:03 | 4 |
| Not only that, Carole, but you don't have to be in the missionary
position to glorify God. :-)
-- Mike
|
237.26 | Give it up | LEDS::LOPEZ | ...A River...bright as crystal | Wed May 29 1991 14:05 | 8 |
|
"But fornication and all uncleaness or unbridled greedy lust, let it not
even be named among you, as is fitting for saints;"
Ephesians 5:3
|
237.27 | | DEMING::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Wed May 29 1991 14:14 | 3 |
| Oh, well, since you put it that way, I guess that settles it. :-)
-- Mike
|
237.28 | | LEDS::LOPEZ | ...A River...bright as crystal | Wed May 29 1991 14:39 | 12 |
|
re.27
God already settled the matter.
I just mentioned it.
Decide.
ace
|
237.29 | But hey, thanks for sharing it with me. | DEMING::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Wed May 29 1991 14:48 | 3 |
| That's your opinion.
-- Mike
|
237.30 | There is law in the kingdom... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Wed May 29 1991 15:27 | 12 |
| RE: 23
Two scriptures for you Mike:
1) Where there is no law there is no sin.
2) But when the law came, I died...in the law is death.
So, as long as you don't have laws you'll never sin...but God has laws
for you if you plan to see him.
|
237.31 | | JURAN::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Wed May 29 1991 16:34 | 5 |
| Thanks, Playtoe, for sharing that with me. However, as I mentioned, I
don't consider what many people define here as "fornication" to be a
sin.
-- Mike
|
237.32 | | BSS::VANFLEET | Uncommon Woman | Wed May 29 1991 16:51 | 8 |
| Another scripture for you, Playtoe...
As you believe so shall ye be.
Nanci }:-)
|
237.33 | | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | Proud Sponsor FAWoL | Wed May 29 1991 23:26 | 16 |
| Note 237.26
> "But fornication and all uncleaness or unbridled greedy lust, let it not
>even be named among you, as is fitting for saints;" (Ephesians 5.3)
Is it possible that the first century understanding of fornication
does not correspond to what we now call fornication? That is, like what
we've heard happened to concepts such as engagement and marriage?
>Note 229.94
>This does not correspond either to what we now call a marriage or what
>we now call an engagement.
Whimsically,
Richard
|
237.34 | Oh yeah? | CSC32::LECOMPTE | MARANATHA! | Thu May 30 1991 00:52 | 8 |
|
re .32
Nanci,
Scripture reference please. Can you give that to us in
context.
ed
|
237.35 | I don't buy it. | CSC32::LECOMPTE | MARANATHA! | Thu May 30 1991 00:58 | 10 |
| re.33
Ok, Richard.
So are you saying that in another 100 years or so, if our idea of
what lying or stealing or murder or ... changes then Gods' laws need
to adapt to our perception of sin rather then us conforming to His idea
of righteousness?
_ed-
|
237.36 | the meaning of the word was in question | XANADU::FLEISCHER | without vision the people perish (381-0899 ZKO3-2/T63) | Thu May 30 1991 12:14 | 26 |
| re Note 237.35 by CSC32::LECOMPTE:
> -< I don't buy it. >-
If I may be so bold to but in:
> So are you saying that in another 100 years or so, if our idea of
> what lying or stealing or murder or ... changes then Gods' laws need
> to adapt to our perception of sin rather then us conforming to His idea
Ed,
Either Richard didn't express it well, or you didn't read it
well.
What Richard was saying is that if in 100 years, the words
"lying" or "stealing" mean something other than what they
mean today (which is approximately what they mean in the
current Biblical texts), then for a 21st-century Noter to
start a topic "Liars and proud of it" would not be
necessarily counter to Scripturally-based morality.
(The issue of adapting God's laws doesn't come up, it's just
a matter of linguistic usage.)
Bob
|
237.37 | | BSS::VANFLEET | Uncommon Woman | Thu May 30 1991 12:26 | 6 |
| Ed,
I can't remember the reference off the top of my head. I'll see if I
can find it over the weekend.
Nanci
|
237.38 | | LEDS::LOPEZ | ...A River...bright as crystal | Thu May 30 1991 14:22 | 11 |
|
RE.29
>That's your opinion.
What then does Eph 5:3 mean in Quaker beliefs?
ace
|
237.39 | | LEDS::LOPEZ | ...A River...bright as crystal | Thu May 30 1991 14:40 | 11 |
|
re.16
>John 8:7
Ahem.
Read on....
John 8:11 "...go, and from now on, sin no more"
|
237.40 | | DEMING::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Thu May 30 1991 14:53 | 7 |
| Ace,
I don't speak for all Quakers. Quakers disagree among themselves on
many issues of theology. I am sure that different Quakers would react
differently to the passage you cited.
-- Mike
|
237.41 | Sin or not, it defiles the soul... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 16:06 | 26 |
| Re: 31
Actually, the bible speaks of two forms of fornication, one is a
commandment, the other is statute. The one we're speaking of here is a
statute (i.e. having sex out of marriage), the other is "fornication
with idols", which is against the first commandment "Thou shalt have no
other god before me."
Not to commit Adultery is the commandment, if you're married you SHOULD
NOT sleep around. Sex "fornication" is like "worshipping idols" in
that you are making love to someone you do not love (an idol, being
unreal, you do not love, because though you think you do it is not
god, can you see the correlation? kind of the reverse scenerio.)
Fornication "defiles" YOUR spirit, like putting your eggs in a basket
with holes in it, like "casting your pearls to swine" (I'm not calling
any person a swine, I'm just making an analogy).
God has a high regard for "seeds" and how and where they're planted.
Commandments, seem to have more collective ramifications when broken,
statutes are more for the "individuals" well being.
Playtoe
|
237.42 | I'm for Polygamy... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 16:12 | 10 |
| RE: 32
I can accept that...but I also believe in having multiple wives!
The bible says, "Do not become one with a harlot (one who sleeps
around)", I know from experience the reason for this, IT'LL TEAR YOUR
HEART APART. The bible says "the bishop and the deacons should have
ONE wife", one could say this infers others may have more!
Playtoe
|
237.43 | Get back to the source...that's the best and most sure way... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 16:54 | 22 |
| RE: 33
> Is it possible that the first century understanding of fornication
>does not correspond to what we now call fornication?
If what we now call fornication is not what they meant long ago, we
better find out what THEY meant and do that. If we change the meaning
of what they were meaning when they said it, then we have effectively
removed ourselves from the realm of what they meant, and are on our
own. Surely, you can't change the meaning and yet expect the SAME
rewards..."lean NOT unto thine own understanding."
I think it is IMPERATIVE that we do what ever we can to find and obey
the original meaning of the scriptures. I will never work us changing
the meaning and expect God to respect that new meaning as replacing the
old. Consider this, "Who authorized the change, God or men?" Who gave
us the original, God or men?" If God gave it, men can't change it. If
men gave it, then indeed do with it as you will...but the bible itself
says, it came not by the will of men, but by the will of God. So if
you say men gave it, you've already begun to change the meaning.
Playtoe
|
237.44 | Sounds like trickery to me. | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 16:57 | 6 |
| Re: 36
> (The issue of adapting God's laws doesn't come up, it's just
> a matter of linguistic usage.)
I think this is known as "deception".
|
237.45 | Get it for YOURSELF, then you can teach well. | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 17:04 | 13 |
| Re; The Discussion so far
I really think we're doing something with this topic...seriously
discussing it. I like this...
Mike, it's safe for you to keep ducking behind "denominations" but are
you finding any answers for YOU, are YOU coming to the understanding
that will help YOU do the will of God? To me, your comments are more
like footnotes, something to which I feel strange responding to, am I
talking to YOU or to the multitude of Quakers and their various
beliefs?
Playtoe
|
237.46 | | DEMING::VALENZA | Stop picking your notes! | Thu May 30 1991 17:14 | 18 |
| Actually, Playtoe, I am very much satisfied with the answers I have
come to considering the questions of sexual morality. I was asked a
question about how my denomination felt about that particular issue,
and I answered that there is no single Quaker response to the
question. I *have* expressed my own views on this issue here in this
topic, as well as elsewhere, but I cannot say that this is how
"Quakers" as a group feel about it. I know that unprogrammed Quakers
have generally moved in the direction of accepting homosexuality (some
Quaker meetings even perform same-sex marriages now), but the Friends
United Meeting (which represents most programmed Quakers in the U.S.)
has generally been less accepting of homosexuality.
I always speak for myself when I write in this notes conference. I may
or may not also be expressing characteristic Quaker views at the same
time; if so, I usually identify those views with Quakerism. Otherwise,
I don't speak for other Quakers.
-- Mike
|
237.47 | just count the "obsolete" entries in any dictionary! | XANADU::FLEISCHER | without vision the people perish (381-0899 ZKO3-2/T63) | Thu May 30 1991 17:57 | 16 |
| re Note 237.44 by SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST:
> > (The issue of adapting God's laws doesn't come up, it's just
> > a matter of linguistic usage.)
>
> I think this is known as "deception".
Playtoe,
There are scores (hundreds?) of words whose principal common
meaning has changed over the centuries for all sorts of
reasons. Some of them may even be words that are used in
English translations of the Bible. Is this ordinary
evolution of language "deception" to you?
Bob
|
237.48 | Ordinary? Is that an authorization to change God's meaning | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Thu May 30 1991 19:03 | 21 |
| Re: 47
> English translations of the Bible. Is this ordinary
> evolution of language "deception" to you?
No, that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is if you believe that
the "ordinary evolution of language" which has caused the change of
meaning of the original words used in the bible--what they
meant--qualifies us to change the meanings of the original intent of
the bible, I think you are deceived, and if you teach that you are
teaching "deception".
What SHOULD occur is, if a word today no longer means what it meant
yesterday, when you translate yesterday's words into today's english,
you'd better use the today's english word for yesterday's words.
You must remember when someone translates a word from one language to
another, you're translating "meanings"...if the new translation doesn't
mean the same as that from which it was translated, then that is a
"mistranslation", wouldn't you say?
Playtoe
|
237.49 | | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | Human | Thu May 30 1991 20:59 | 8 |
| Playtoe,
I agree with nearly everything you said in 237.43. You've
articulated one of the main reasons I personally rarely read
the King James version of the Bible. The English language has
changed that much in just 300 years.
Richard
|
237.50 | | RUTLND::RMAXFIELD | Lilac time | Fri May 31 1991 14:32 | 13 |
| First of all, "fornication" is such a value-loaded term, I really
don't care for it. But for those who wish to take its Biblical
meaning (any sexual activity outside of marriage between a man
and a woman), I'm sure I'm considered a fornicator, even though
I've been in a committed, monogamous relationship with my
partner for 13 years.
Question: if we were married by a Unitarian Universalist
minister, would we no longer be considered fornicators? There is
a UU minister in Portsmouth NH who marries same-sex
partners.
Richard
|
237.51 | Either love HIM Right, or not at all... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Fri May 31 1991 15:18 | 15 |
| RE: 50
In my way of seeing things, "two become one" by the power of love, and
not by a piece of paper. Marriage, therefore, means when two people
fall in love. The "Marriage License" is something that is "rendered to
Ceasar", or to the State, for legal purposes. This is supported also
by the fact that according to the State, two people are legally married
if they 'live together for more than 6 months', known as "Common Law"
marriage. If the Marriage license was a "requirement" for true
marriage, the Common Law marriage could not be recognised...anyway, my
brother, if you love God, do his will according to how he said it. If
you don't, I guess don't worry about ANY of it.
Playtoe
|
237.52 | | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | Human | Fri May 31 1991 23:33 | 35 |
| Re: 237.50
Richard,
There are growing numbers of clergy who are willing to officiate
and bless covenantal relationships within same-sex dyads.
Among them are some Unitarian Universalist ministers, as you
mentioned. Among churches more traditional in theology, the MCC
(Metropolitan Community Church) will consecrate and honor Holy Unions,
that is, same-sex marriages.
A friend of mine and his lover were counseled and united in
a religious ceremony performed by an Episcopalian priest. The priest
did so without support from the larger Episcopal body. But, he did do
it.
Members of Dumbarton United Methodist Church favored sanctifying
the marriage of two women in their church, but their bishop refused to
allow the ceremony on UMC premises and threatened to have the credentials
of their pastor revoked if he officiated the event. And so, the sanctuary
of another denomination was secured and a United Methodist layperson
conducted the celebration of love and commitment between the two women,
as witnessed by a congregation consisting mostly of United Methodists.
Mike Valenza, do you know where Friends currently stand on
overseeing same-sex weddings? I suspect it varies widely; that there
is currently no consensus.
Actually, Richard, after 13 years of fidelity with the same
partner, it sounds like you might be more married now than many heterosexual
couples who've experienced a church-sanctioned ritual of matrimony.
Peace,
Richard
|
237.53 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Fri May 31 1991 23:44 | 14 |
| somewhere in this file, Collis dismissed my assertation about
sexual relations being acceptable after a formal betrothal..
but when Joseph and Mary went to Bethlehem, she was still his
'espoused' wife.... I can't imagine that in those times a man
and a woma could be allowed to travel together as spouses,
and not have it expected, under 'normal' situations that they
were not intimate.
Sorry Collis, but I'll accept the word of scholars and preachers
and other sources who told me that was the 'norm' before I'll
accept your casual dismissal of me as being wrong.
Bonnie
|
237.54 | | JURAN::VALENZA | Note while you purr. | Tue Jun 04 1991 00:27 | 30 |
| Richard,
To answer your question about Friends overseeing same-sex weddings, you
are correct that there is currently no consensus on this issue. As I
understand it, the Friends United Meeting has taken a stand against
homosexuality in general; but many unprogrammed meetings outside of
FUM, on the other hand, have performed same-sex marriages. The
following item appeared in the December, 1989 issue of Friends Journal:
Although a few meetings considered same-sex marriages in the 1970s,
the first known same-sex union under the care of a meeting occurred
in Seattle's University Meeting in 1981 when two women requested
marriage. Some Friends had reservations about calling it marriage,
so the meeting went forward with a ceremony, calling it a
"celebration of commitment." Since then, several meetings have
had celebrations of commitment...
The first recorded single-sex marriage in a Friends meeting
occurred at Morningside (N.Y.) Meeting in 1987. Five other
marriages occurred later that year at Grass Valley (Calif.)
Meeting, Penn Valley (Mo.) Meeting, North Meadow Circle of Friends
(Ind.), Twin Cities (Minn.) Meeting, and Berkeley (Calif.) Meeting.
Judging from the minutes produced by these meetings and by several
other meetings that have registered their support for single-sex
marriages or ceremonies of commitment, the search of clearness on
this issue has catalyzed a re-evaluation of the meaning of a
marriage when it occurs under the care of a meeting.
-- Mike
|
237.55 | | JURAN::SILVA | A word to ya MUTHA! | Tue Jun 04 1991 09:40 | 37 |
|
| First of all, "fornication" is such a value-loaded term, I really
| don't care for it. But for those who wish to take its Biblical
| meaning (any sexual activity outside of marriage between a man
| and a woman), I'm sure I'm considered a fornicator,
Richard! You can't be a fornicator! Remember, it's any sexual activity
outside of marriage between a man AND a WOMAN! So you're scott free! ;-)
| even though
| I've been in a committed, monogamous relationship with my
| partner for 13 years.
Talk about love! How many marriages last that long these days? I guess
it goes to show you that it's LOVE that will keep people together, not a piece
of paper. It would seem that God IS a very BIG part of your life Richard, and
I'm sure you seek his help when things go wrong, and I know God is there for
you. Wouldn't it be great if you could get the same respect from ALL people that
you get from God? Wouldn't it be great to be able to walk into a church (any
church) with your partner (husband for all practical purposes) and NOT have
anyone flinch? Maybe someday people will get over it and love everyone,
regardless of their differences, the way God loves us.
| Question: if we were married by a Unitarian Universalist
| minister, would we no longer be considered fornicators?
Good question Richard!
| There is
| a UU minister in Portsmouth NH who marries same-sex
| partners.
Thanks Richard. You never know when that info will come in handy! :-)
Glen
|
237.56 | | JURAN::SILVA | A word to ya MUTHA! | Tue Jun 04 1991 09:47 | 31 |
|
| In my way of seeing things, "two become one" by the power of love, and
| not by a piece of paper.
I guess I should have read on BEFORE I replied, huh?
| Marriage, therefore, means when two people
| fall in love. The "Marriage License" is something that is "rendered to
| Ceasar", or to the State, for legal purposes.
Ceasar, the State, aren't they one in the same? ;-)
| This is supported also
| by the fact that according to the State, two people are legally married
| if they 'live together for more than 6 months', known as "Common Law"
| marriage.
Is this just for heterosexual couples? Are you talking about
Massachusetts? The reason I ask is if you become leagally married after
6 months of living together, then I would think that then the benifits
you receive from a "legal marriage" should come into play, right?
| If the Marriage license was a "requirement" for true
| marriage, the Common Law marriage could not be recognised...anyway, my
| brother, if you love God, do his will according to how he said it. If
| you don't, I guess don't worry about ANY of it.
Can you elaborate on that Playtoe? I'm not 100% sure of what you meant
and don't want to jump to conclusions. Thanks! :-)
Glen
|
237.57 | Ok I'll try to elaborate... | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Wed Jun 05 1991 12:41 | 34 |
| RE: 56
> is "rendered to
>| Ceasar", or to the State, for legal purposes.
> Ceasar, the State, aren't they one in the same? ;-)
That's what I was trying to say, "rendered to Ceasar" means "State".
> Is this just for heterosexual couples? Are you talking about
>Massachusetts? The reason I ask is if you become leagally married after
>6 months of living together, then I would think that then the benifits
>you receive from a "legal marriage" should come into play, right?
The time varies from state to state (6 months on up), but I believe
every, if not most states, have a Common Law marriage law. For the
most part this law applies to heterosexual couples. And the benefits
you receive from a "legal marriage" do come into play, especially in
terms of "dividing the things the house has gained since you two were
living there together"...
>| If the Marriage license was a "requirement" for true
>| marriage, the Common Law marriage could not be recognised...anyway, my
>| brother, if you love God, do his will according to how he said it. If
>| you don't, I guess don't worry about ANY of it.
> Can you elaborate on that Playtoe? I'm not 100% sure of what you meant
>and don't want to jump to conclusions. Thanks! :-)
If the Marriage "license" was a requirement, I mean to say "in the
sight of God"...which in turn suggests that marriage is when two people
fall in love and consummate that love by engaging in sex...I think the
crux of the matter is rooted in "having sex".
|
237.58 | | JURAN::SILVA | A word to ya MUTHA! | Wed Jun 05 1991 15:29 | 8 |
|
Thanks! I appreciate it.
Glen
|
237.59 | from my law studies | CARTUN::NOONAN | Another het for lesbigay rights! | Mon Jun 10 1991 13:50 | 10 |
| Most states do *not* recognize Common-Law marriages. Those that do
require something more like 7 years of living together. However, since
living together without benefit of marriage is illegal in most states
(still!) this becomes a catch-22.
Also, there must be a declared avowal of marriage between the two
people involved.
E Grace
|
237.60 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Mon Jun 10 1991 14:11 | 7 |
| E Grace
I thought it wasn't so much a 'clared avowal of marriage' but that
they gave the impression to outsiders that they were married..
or is that the same thing?
Bonnie
|
237.61 | | DPDMAI::DAWSON | A Different Light | Tue Jun 11 1991 09:12 | 7 |
| RE: .59 E,
In Texas its 24 hours and anything that relates you two
as a husband and wife....ie....Mr. & Mrs. at the local motel regestry.
Quite a few people have been "caught" on this one. :-)
Dave
|
237.62 | Pray for your soul's salvation...don't fool yourself! | SWAM1::DOTHARD_ST | PLAYTOE | Wed Jun 12 1991 20:32 | 19 |
| RE: Common Law Marriages
Yes, I stand corrected...been watching too many movies about Texas!
But, the point still stands about "common law" marriages being as legal
as paper ones...I think sex has a lot to do with it.
This point was made, however, to say that fornication and adultery
involves people in love, moreso than people bound by paper. "Adultery"
means to "adulterate" or "contaminate" the LOVE RELATIONSHIP, IMHO.
But, bottom line is for all fornicators who are proud of it, please try
to pray a little for that. You know, I've found it a terrible thing to
get use to justifying sinful acts, once you start it's hard to stop!
One thing leads to another and the next thing you know you've totally
rejected the spirit of godliness in you and then that's when the
trouble starts.
Playtoe
|
237.63 | | CSC32::J_CHRISTIE | El Gallo de Paz | Wed Jun 12 1991 20:42 | 7 |
| Note 237.62
> ...I think sex has a lot to do with it.
With this, I could not agree more. ;-}
Richard
|
237.64 | | DPDMAI::DAWSON | A Different Light | Wed Jun 12 1991 22:44 | 13 |
| RE: .62 Playtoe....
>Yes, I stand corrected...been watching too many movies about Texas!
(in my *best* John Wayne)
*Smile when ya say that pilgrim!*
;^)
Dave
|
237.65 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Thu Jun 13 1991 10:01 | 7 |
| Dave
it doesn't work without the accent!
:-)
BJ
|
237.66 | | DPDMAI::DAWSON | A Different Light | Thu Jun 13 1991 10:31 | 6 |
| RE: .65 Bonnie,
Weeellllll....unfortunatly this is not "voice notes".
;^)
Dave
|
237.67 | | WMOIS::REINKE_B | bread and roses | Thu Jun 13 1991 10:51 | 4 |
| Yeah, I know, the way we New Englanders 'read' what you write isn't
the way you 'speak' it.
BJ
|
237.68 | | POWDML::FLANAGAN | I feel therefore I am | Mon Oct 24 1994 11:27 | 4 |
| Is anyone else beside me missing Mike and his wonderful sense of humor?
Patricia
|
237.69 | | GRIM::MESSENGER | Bob Messenger | Mon Oct 24 1994 11:39 | 9 |
| Definitely! Mike was at his best when he was poking fun at the sexual
morality of the right, or when mocking self-righteous televangelists.
But he could also be serious, as when discussing "process theology" or
other religious theories.
I have an idea: we should institute a "Mike Valenza award" to be given to
recognize witty, satirical Valenza-like notes.
-- Bob
|