Conference 7.286::golf

    
    This is a topic that I was descussing with a friend just recently.
    
    My favorite way to rattle an opponent is with the putter.  Up until
    this year I play a respectable game of golf.  The way that I was
    able to score, was with a good short game especially 5- 6 ft putts.
    Sooooooo I really enjoy getting the ball up and down and grinding
    an opponent into the ground.  After a while you can see a guy start
    to shake his head and wonder.
    
    
    					KO

	 What annoys  me the most is when I play with someone who is playing
	 way  over  his usual standard, and refuses to acknowledge it by ANY
	 shouts of joy or whatever - and just behaves as usual. 

	 That really  kills  my  self-confidence.  When I have a good day, I
	 let it SHOW...

	 --- Mr Litby

    Here are a few that have happened to me over the years:
    
    1. Just as you're about to stroke that delicate chip shot from the
       fringe, your opponent asks you if you'd like him to tend the
       flag.
    
    2. Your opponent drops his clubs as you're in the middle of a putt.
    
    3. Someone in your group, who's pulling a noisy cart, rattles up
       behind you as you're starting your downswing.
    
    4. As you're putting, your opponent decides to take off his glove,
       and boy, does that velcro make a nice ripping sound!
    
    5. Again, while you're putting, someone moves behind you, casting
       his shadow over the line.
    
    I'm sure there are others (like "boy is this green fast (or slow)"),
    but that'll do for now.
    

     The old "boy, I just tapped that one", as the ball goes racing
    by the cup, or the opposite "geeze... I killed that one", as the
    ball ends up six feet short... These are both friendly joking remarks
    on the green....
    
    But dropping clubs in the middle of a put, casting a shadow, even
    moving WHILE another person is putting are unheard of with the guys
    I play with ..... under normal conditions.... Doing anything DURING
    the put which will distract from it is not a 'friendly' thing to
    do, if your at all serious about the game. 
    
     -1 'dropping clubs in middle of a put' :*) .... I got a kick out
    of that one...
    
      Smitty

    	The one that gets me is when I'm continually asked my score
    
    	after a bad hole, it goes something like this---
    
    	What was your score Luke?
    
    	'7'
    
    	Triple bogey was it?
    
    	'yes'
    
    
    	Three over heh?
    
    
    	'yea'
    
    
    	No points then?
    
    	'yes' grinding the teeth
    
    			I'm sure it will work the same trick on others
    too...
    
    
    							lfb

    One of the best ways to upset your competition is to remind them
    of how well they are doing. Such as "you're -1 with four holes to
    play " This immediatly causes the player to reflect on the round
    rather than the remaining holes. Too many players do this all by
    themselves, and overall it is one of the reasons many golfers are
    good but only a few are great. Concentration......

    RE. -1
    Yup, many years ago I was on the verge of breaking 90 for the
    first time, and knew I was getting close; my playing partner, in
    all innocence (it was his first time ever on a golf course) checked
    the scorecard as we left the 16th green, and announced, "All you
    need to do is bogey the next two holes and you'll shoot 89."
    
    I immediately double-bogeyed  17, and was ready to wrap my sand
    wedge around his neck, which I probably would have done if I hadn't
    miraculously parred 18!
    
    Frank
    

    
    A mean trick.......
    
    Just before your "playing partner" tees off ask..
       
    Do you breath IN or OUT during your backswing..
       
       
    Its good for a couple of holes at least :-)
    
      

    Right...see .3
    
    Almost anything that will get them thinking too much is a killer!
    Mis-information or "dis-information" is also effective, like "Gee,
    I only hit a 7," after you've knocked it over the green with a 5.
    I have a partner/opponent who does this all the time (I've learned
    to ignore anything he says, but it was mind-blowing for a while
    - I was constantly underclubbing, till I learned to believe my eyes
    rather than my ears).
    
    Now I'm anxiously waiting for the end of the month, so my wife and
    I can fly out to Phoenix and get in a round or two while visiting
    friends!
    

    
     Etiquette, that is the name of the game. All of these little spurts
     or unsportsmanlike conduct used to upset my game immensely. Since
     I used to play mostly on municipal courses, the senior citizen
     with the innocent bad etiquette was a real problem. I finally got
     tired of hearing "Sorry, I didn't see you putting" or the ever
     popular "You are away". I am not blind I can see that 10 feet is
     farther away from the hole than 5 feet.
    
     If I hit a drive 275 into the trees, "nice shot sonny"
     If I hit it down the middle...I hear the crickets!
    
     Ever happened to you?
    
     I decided when we got to the fairway, I would say "you're away!"
     One time I deliberately threw the front nine, and after the guy
     decided to be nice and let me have 3 strokes on the back nine(he
     had 41 I had 58 on the front), I took him for $9.00.
     (I had 37 he had 49).
    
     Finally, I decided to avoid municipal courses.
    
     Don't get me wrong, I don't have a prejudice against senior citizens.
     I have just seen a bunch of real winners on municipal courses.
    
    
    
     Eugene in Phoenix 
    
     

    Re #10 - It's not just the old guys (but I do know what you mean).
    I was in Phoenix recently (just got back here last week), and had
    the pleasure of playing at Dobson Ranch, a public course. The first
    two rounds were most enjoyable. Actually got around the entire 18
    in just about 4.5 hours! Then came round 3, otherwise known as The
    Nightmare On The Fairways. Originally, my wife was supposed to play,
    but after hitting a bucket on the driving range, she didn't think
    she was playing well enough. Hah! Compared to her replacement, she
    was a veritable Nancy Lopez. The guy I got paired up with was about
    25, stood about 5'4", and couldn't have weighed more than 120 lbs.
    He was wearing a stocking cap, and a heavy winter jacket (almost a
    parka). His name was Scott, but he will forever live in my memory
    as The Son of Sneakers, in honor of another of his ilk I met at
    Stow Acres a couple of decades ago.
    
    After watching him take a couple of swipes at the ball, it was clear
    he'd gotten himself a set of clubs, some golf balls and shoes, and
    gone directly to the course, without burdening himself with lessons
    or a session on the range. He had no idea of the game. On his drives,
    he would step into the ball, like a batter trying to hit a curve
    ball; club selection was a mystery - he once took out a wedge when
    still over 200 yards from the green (he finally asked me which would
    hit the ball further, a 7 iron or a 5); after several times stepping
    on people's lines while attempting to sink 2-foot putts from all
    sides of the hole, one of the other guys gently explained why that
    was not a good thing to do: nonetheless, he kept right on doing
    it! The worst thing was knowing that our group was holding up those
    behind us; no amount of urging or coaching could make him play any
    faster (he was only averaging about 25 yards per shot, and rarely
    in the right direction). I kept waiting for the ranger to appear
    and ask him to move along or leave, but he never did! By the time
    I holed out on 18, I couldn't get off the course fast enough.
    
    It's certainly true that a major peril of publinx playing is the
    unpredictability of playing partners (I guess you should have a
    regular foursome to avoid this); but they come in all shapes, sizes,
    sexes and age groups. In fact, one of the best pairings I had at
    Dobson was with a 21-year old and his grandfather, both of whom
    were very competent players, and a real pleasure to be with for
    18 holes.
    
    Still, I look forward to another winter sojourn in Arizona. When
    I saw all those driving ranges, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven!
    
Frank