T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
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1748.1 | Ghost keys | DREGS::BLICKSTEIN | Yo! | Sun Oct 30 1988 13:55 | 5 |
|
Ghost keys: The keys you wish your MIDI controller had when your
fingers run off the edge of the keyboard
db
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1748.2 | Eddster's Unabashed Dictionary | WEFXEM::COTE | The Protocol Son... | Sun Oct 30 1988 18:04 | 24 |
|
Whasat: (whu'sat) n. The noise made by guitarists in reaction
to the dreaded 'stuck note'. (Ex: Let a
note stick and watch your guitarist go
"Whasat?")
tsi-tsi-tsi-tsi-tsi-tsi-tsi-sheee: (ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-shit') n.
A horrible noise made by novice drum machine
programmers. Usually repeated ad nauseum.
piano: (pe AN oh) n. A mythical sound that many midiots believe
in.
spontaneity: (spawn ta NAY it tee) n. The state of constant tempo
changes. A nirvana sought by those who can't
play to a click track.
drummer: (DRUH mer) n. (archaic) Foolish pre-MIDI attempt to provide
percussive sounds. Usually loaded with
spontaneity.
studio: (STEW dee oh) n. Where midiots with no gigs hang out.
Edd
|
1748.3 | Some more | DREGS::BLICKSTEIN | Yo! | Mon Oct 31 1988 09:42 | 44 |
| MIDIholic - a person addicted to buying MIDI gear
MIDIwife - the wife of a MIDIholic
M.A. - MIDIholics Anonymous, a help group for MIDIholics formed
and inspired by Dave Blickstein. As in AA meetings, you introduce
yourself with "Hi, I'm Dave and I'm a MIDIholic".
MIDIgate - the process of trying to resolve incompatabilities
between MIDI equipment produced by different manufacturers.
MIDIQUEST - the question that true MIDIholics are perpetually asking
themselves - "What do I get 'next'?"
MIDItate - the process of answering the MIDIQUEST.
MIDruptcy - the inevitable financial result of MIDItating.
MIDIum - a spiritual MIDI guru.
MIDICare - those 800 help numbers that every manufacturer except
Roland provides to their users.
MIDIcine - the help provided by MIDICare or MIDIums.
MIDIocre - An adjective used by certain Commusic'ers to describe
any "Y-word" product.
MIDley - a string of totally unrelated musical ideas realized into
MIDI sequences and strung together and offered as a "song" on
a Commusic tape ;-)
MIDIlla Toolongata - A MIDley that goes on forever.
MIDget - a MIDI novice.
KIDIs - what a MIDIholic call his children (or feline pets)
Cord-a-rang - the "bad" cable that no matter how many times you pull
out of your rig, seems to always find it's way back into your
rig to create hassles with buzzes and hums.
db
|
1748.4 | it's for you ... it's Robin ... | MIZZOU::SHERMAN | socialism doesn't work ... | Mon Oct 31 1988 10:16 | 10 |
|
seven-month-itch - the secret hope that your SGU will suffer irrepairable
damage so that you can justify purchase of a brand new SGU to your
spouse/children/pets/accountant.
disco fever - an overcoming feeling of nausea experienced even at the mention
of Robin Leach, 'Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous', John Travolta,
the Bee Gees or of playing preset drum patches.
Steve
|
1748.5 | | ANT::JANZEN | Tom LMO2/O23 296-5421 | Mon Oct 31 1988 10:38 | 3 |
| Music: The combination and presentation of sounds for no particular
reason.
Tom
|
1748.6 | | MARVIN::MACHIN | | Mon Oct 31 1988 10:51 | 6 |
| Listen (verb): Active use of the aural sense in order to justify:
a) purchase
b) abuse of fellow noter
c) personal agrandisement
|
1748.7 | more SNIGLETS | SALSA::MOELLER | There'll always be a | Mon Oct 31 1988 13:42 | 12 |
| PATCHGARF: When your 'BreathyBell' sound magically becomes 'BugFarts'
OCTOMONDO: The musician's state while simultaneously: booting his
MIDI computer, finding/loading floppies into sampler(s),
starting the master keyboard controller, selecting
favorite digital reverb/FX settings, fishing the
footpedals out from under things, untangling headphone
cords, repatching everything after last night's mixdown
session, entering his software sequencer's 'key' diskette,
cursing copy-protection schemes under his breath
karl
|
1748.8 | most of these apply to me | SRFSUP::MORRIS | It's money that matters | Mon Oct 31 1988 15:58 | 15 |
|
Algorhythm: Drum machine program
Drummer: A guy who hangs out with musicians
Musical Masturbator: A guy who buys tons of gear to record
songs, and then never plays with anyone,
and no one ever hears his songs
Y-cables: A figment of book authors. They don't really exist.
Neanderthal: Person who insists on using tacky things like
stomp boxes and ARP string ensembles because:
1) he thinks they have a *warmer* sound,
2) (real reason) he's cheap
|
1748.9 | a crack and a contribution | DDIF::EIRIKUR | Hallgrimsson, CDA Product Manager | Mon Oct 31 1988 15:58 | 9 |
| .7: Bugfarts: Don't knock 'em 'til you've tried 'em.
Synthesist: A person posessed of the extraordinary interdisciplinary
skills required to OCTOMONDO.
Eirikur
|
1748.10 | Comes in two varieties... | DREGS::BLICKSTEIN | Yo! | Mon Oct 31 1988 16:16 | 9 |
| Already accepted nomenclature:
MIDIot - A MIDI novice
Not so accepted:
Flaming MIDIot - One of those self-proclaimed "purists" who
says it isn't music if it wasn't performed by human
hands.
|
1748.11 | I think I'll quit for now. | DYO780::SCHAFER | Brad - back in Ohio. | Mon Oct 31 1988 16:49 | 20 |
| DYNAMIC VOICE ALLOCATION - feature of a vocal choir that practices
staggered breathing.
ORCHESTRA HIT - jug passed off-camera during Boston pops telecasts
DIN CABLE - noisy cord
SCSI PORT - for skid row disks
PARTIALS - completes come with next update
RAM - a buck sheep
ROM - a RAM that can't think for itself
SAMPLE RATE - number of (insert favorite food/beverage here) that can
be consumed per minute
CROSS FADE - sound of grouchy spouse as s/he walks away from you
|
1748.12 | You're stuck.... | WEFXEM::COTE | The Protocol Son... | Mon Oct 31 1988 16:51 | 6 |
|
LOOP, START: See LOOP, END
LOOP, END: See LOOP, START
Edd
|
1748.13 | dB knows about cyberfarts! | CTHULU::YERAZUNIS | Great Satan: 9, Ayatollah: 3 | Mon Oct 31 1988 18:27 | 13 |
|
PLUNKY: well, you know, plunky. Like a pizzacotto violin
being played in an empty oil drum.
Commuddle: stuff on commusic tapes that has "a synth in there
somewhere".
Cyberfart: the flatuent noise a synth/sampler makes when being
powered up/powered down/crashing the ROM OS. Cyberfarts
smell just like burnt-out speaker drivers and blown-out
mix-board chips.
|
1748.14 | reMIDIal Music 101 | DRFIX::PICKETT | David - Beware of the dogma | Mon Oct 31 1988 18:38 | 26 |
|
Transubstantiate - The mystical conversion of all your capital assets
into electronic music gear.
reMIDIal Music - A course designed to teach all those 'Step-Timers'
the necessary skills to play a simple tune in real
time.
MIDIval Technology - A MIDI Wind Controller which keys like a Serpent.
coMIDIan - A person who cracks jokes about electronic music.
The aMIDIville Horror - A horror flick about a pagan music store
which sells posessed keyboards. The keyboards
inspire the owners to generate garbage music
using only stock patches. The movie stars
Susan Cianni.
SYSEXtacy - The emotional pleasure derived from getting two highly
incompatible keyboards to exchange SYSEX info suscessfully.
Zippy the DINhead - A surreal cartoon about electronic musicians.
dp
|
1748.15 | 3 more | DREGS::BLICKSTEIN | Yo! | Tue Nov 01 1988 09:24 | 10 |
| Cha cha box: The prehistoric precursor to drum machines often
known as "rhythm boxes", often found on Lowrey organs.
Boom box - An old spring-type reverb. The name is derived from the
sound they used to make when you accidentally knocked them
over.
White Noise - the sound offered as "crash cymbal" on inferior drum machines
db
|
1748.16 | Got the Bread? | WARMTH::KENT | Edd Case | Tue Nov 01 1988 10:26 | 15 |
|
Farfisa - The ultimate organ ! (don't forget the Fork'n Knife)
Cover - Something you put over your head when singing a Beatles
song but haven't quite got Paul's range.
Paul K.
|
1748.17 | I do most of these, too | SRFSUP::MORRIS | Mc Schnozz | Tue Nov 01 1988 14:26 | 18 |
|
Keyed Noise: The 'snare' sound used on most Prince songs.
Polyalgorhythm: The sound of either 1) Frank Zappa's latest
Synclavier compositon or 2) All of Len's drum
machines chained together at one time
Gridlock: The point of utter confusion attained when trying
to notate drum machine notation on those stupid
scratch sheets that drum machine manufacturers
include to make non-music-readers semi-literate
Banff Schwantz: The act of having to include your latest gimmick
patch, or slide guitar trick, or voice box
thingamajig in your current song
Zevonese: The act of writing songs about non-mainstream
topics (i.e. headless thompson gunners, etc.
|
1748.18 | This is addictive | DREGS::BLICKSTEIN | Yo! | Tue Nov 01 1988 15:40 | 19 |
| I've decided to make a correction:
> White Noise - the sound offered as "crash cymbal" on inferior drum machines
xxxxxxxx
MOST
Fillerbanker - the 39 or so useless patches when you buy a bank of 40
third party synth patches or samples.
ESQuire - An Ensoniq zealot
Rolaids - What you wish for when you find yourself trying to look
something up in Roland documentation
Para-doodle - the technical term for drum patterns programmed by
non-drummers that bear no resemblance to anything a real drummer
would play.
db
|
1748.19 | One from the archives of Uncle Edd's personal names. | DYO780::SCHAFER | Brad - back in Ohio. | Tue Nov 01 1988 15:49 | 2 |
| Portamento - red thingie in the middle of an olive.
|
1748.20 | | WEFXEM::COTE | The Protocol Son... | Tue Nov 01 1988 16:09 | 8 |
| 13th: (1) Bane of Matrix 6 owners. (2) Feeble attempt a
legitimizing a mistake. ("That wasn't a mistake,
it was a 13th!")
Slackjam: What occurs when a MIDIot attempts to put their
pants on *after* putting their shoes on.
Edd
|
1748.21 | | HPSRAD::NORCROSS | | Wed Nov 02 1988 11:56 | 2 |
| MIDI Surprise - Letting a sequence rip after not having looked at it for
several months.
|
1748.22 | | GRANPA::VCARUSO | VINNIE'S GONE FISHIN | Thu Nov 03 1988 10:41 | 6 |
|
MIDI-DUMP When you decide to take up basket weaving and sell off
all those neat little keyboards.
|
1748.23 | | MARVIN::MACHIN | | Thu Nov 03 1988 10:51 | 3 |
| SCSI : a swear word to Casio owners
CASIO : a swear word to Roland owners
ROLAND : a swear word to your bank manager
|
1748.24 | it's a MIDI MIDI MIDI MIDI world | WIOVAX::TROMBLEY | Welcome 2 the Twilight Zone | Fri Dec 02 1988 10:33 | 29 |
|
pseudo-techno-MIDIum - a person/salesperson who thinks that they
know everything about anything pertaining
to MIDI, the MIDIworld and MIDIuniverse.
MIDIworld - that little space in one's mind that they retire to
when not being required by someone else in the non-MIDI
world.
space invader - someone who invades your MIDIworld and breaks your
concentration just when your in deep contemplation.
(usually small children or a spouse)
MIDIuniverse - where MIDIums go to achieve total harmony with MIDI.
MIDIhell - where one mentally ends up after several failing attempts
to get one piece of equipment to work with another.
MIDIcution - that shocking experience that can be achieved by touching
the MIDI out pins to the tip of your tounge.
MIDIside - when one kills themselves by means of MIDIcution.
intoxication - a state achieved when, after many beverages, even
your worst sequence sounds like a work of art.
Brad
|
1748.25 | minnovation | SMURF::NEWHOUSE | | Fri Dec 02 1988 17:13 | 3 |
| minnovation - the creation of [new] 'music' by changing the
instruments used for existing sequencer tracks.
|
1748.26 | "Untitled" | MUSKIE::ALLEN | | Mon Dec 05 1988 14:35 | 10 |
| Like ahh.....
M I D I B A S T A !!!!!!!
o o
"
\_/
|
1748.27 | more,... | WIOVAX::TROMBLEY | Vanna White whom I've seen naked! | Thu Dec 15 1988 16:52 | 9 |
| heres a few more,...
crosstalk - the disturbing noise my wife makes when I start up one
of my practice sessions without closing the door to
the studio first.
timbre - the word lumberjacks yell when a tree is falling.
|
1748.28 | even worse | NAC::SCHUCHARD | PC Arcade | Tue Dec 20 1988 13:51 | 6 |
|
feedback - the sound my wife makes when i start a practice without
closing the door, followed by
flutter - the shudder my house makes after the feedback generator
slams the studio door.
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1748.29 | Anyone wanna buy a used sequencer? | AKO546::JODOIN | | Tue Dec 20 1988 16:03 | 14 |
|
SPLASHZZZZZZ - The sound made by your midi equipment when some a*****e
spills a drink on it!
ACK - The sound made by the same a*****e after spilling a drink
on your equipment as you are now choking him. (2 octaves
above A440 of course)
MIDIWhine - The sounds you now make realizing that there is no way
in **** that the jerk is gonna pay for a new one.
DJ
|