T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
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806.1 | Good Timing | TPVAX3::ROBBINS | | Tue Jul 26 1988 16:53 | 16 |
|
What timing Rick,
My mom had just got the same paper too and I thumbed
through it.... My own gut feeling was that it was one of those
things that you had to kind of separate the trash from the good
stuff. The stuff about the voodoo and casting spells on others
against their will made it seem like more of a money making deal
then anything. But.... I did send my money in and even bought
a piece of jewelry that seemed quite nice (not because of whatever
is attached to it) I figure there was some stuff I found interesting
so why not? Let me know if you do we can trade stories :^)
Kim
|
806.2 | I know about it | MARKER::KALLIS | Anger's no replacement for reason | Tue Jul 26 1988 17:06 | 60 |
| Yes. I goit their "newsletter" for a time. Actually, if you look
at the features, about half of them or better are really advertising
counterpoints. There are certain advertisers (e.g., "Andreika,
the Witch," who advertises that she "live[s] in the third dimension,"
and "Poppa D'oc," who does voodoo on order). Since I don't have
a copy of the paper weith me, let me create a fictitious ad of the
type that would appear in the newsletter ...
VOTARY OF YUGGOTH
Deep in the mist-shrouded lands of Leng are temples of a
secret order of powerful sorcerers, the Votaries of
Yuggoth. Some legends say they are descended from the
Sons of Atal, a select group of elders from a civilization
as old as Atlantis. One member of this order, C'thon,
has come to offer his services to the Americanm public.
C'THON THE ELDER
Repositor of Starry Wisdom, studied strange and arcane
knowledge for most of his incredibly long life. Using the
Secret Rites of Yuggoth, C'thon can help you find happiness,
wealth, and Cosmic Unity. For $25.00, he will cast a spell
to help you achieve your ends.
Somewhere else in the paper would be a "news story" that starts
something like:
RITES OF YUGGOTH SWEEPING COUNTRY
Ever since the dramatic appearance of the mysterious C'thon
the Elder, metaphysical circles have been talking about the
power and effectiveness of the Secret Rites of Yuggoth. Dozens
of prominent people have compared the teachings of C'thon
the Elder to those opf the greatest thinkers of history.
When asked to demonstrate ghis powers, C'thon put on a display
that astonished all those who filled a large hall in Palo
Alto, California recently. ...
There might even be a letter in the letter column:
Dear C'thon:
I cannot thank you enough for the spell you cast that
returned my gerbil, Minky, to me. We had given her up
for lost, but that spell brought her right to us.
I am so impressed with your Secret Rites of Yuggoth that
I'll tell all my friends about your miraculous powers ...
That generally happens when the personality's been advertising
for a while, though.
>They have invited me to apply, for $20.00 , for a lifetime membership.
This also gets you a few extra pages in their newsletter.
I p[ersonally don't think it's an effective return on investment.
Steve Kallis, Jr.
|
806.3 | | GENRAL::DANIEL | Strength proven; success deserved | Tue Jul 26 1988 17:37 | 1 |
| Is a yuggoth a relative of the shoggoth?
|
806.4 | Hi, Meredith! | MARKER::KALLIS | Anger's no replacement for reason | Tue Jul 26 1988 17:58 | 8 |
| re .3 (Meredith):
>Is a yuggoth a relative of the shoggoth?
Not really; "Yuggoth," in the Lovecraftian mythos, is the native
name for the planet Pluto. Thought it would be appropriate.
Steve Kallis, Jr.
|
806.5 | U stepped in what? | WRO8A::GUEST_TMP | Going HOME--as an Adventurer | Tue Jul 26 1988 20:34 | 9 |
| re: -.1
"...the planet Pluto.."
I understand Uranus is a hot place, too! ;-)
Frederick
|
806.6 | reporting the actual latest issue | MARKER::KALLIS | Anger's no replacement for reason | Thu Jul 28 1988 09:31 | 22 |
| Re .5 (Fredrick):
Speak for yourself! :-)
Re .3 (me):
Today I got my copy. On the front page are three stories. One
is on Mozart's spirit channeling through a peasant woman. A second
claims "Aztec-Mantaz Charm is New Rage in Hollywoopd," with a reference
at the end of the story to the ad on Aztec-Mantaz charms. The final
one is, "Lottery Winner Attributes Win to Witch's Spell," with an
end-story reference to another story on Andreika, the Witch (which
in turn references her ad). Page 2 has two stories, one of which,
on "Psychic Master" Benjamin Thornton, has a reference to _his_
ad. Page 3 has a story on Andreika, he Witch, and a reference to
her ad, page 4 has two stories,. both with ad ereferences, page
5 is a full-page ad for Andreika, the Witch. Page 6 has a single
story with ad reference ...
I guess that gives a flavor for the publication.
Steve Kallis, Jr.
|
806.7 | Who put the Ram in the Ramalamadingdong? | WRO8A::GUEST_TMP | Going HOME--as an Adventurer | Thu Jul 28 1988 14:15 | 17 |
| ...yes, and there is also a wonderful mantra that can be chanted
to help heal the rift within the cranial lobotomy and the hyperkinetic
transcendant membrane. For this, though, it usually helps to be
a believer in the wisdom of Siam. The mantra is actually a suppication
to his omniscient understanding and to do it properly his entire
name is invoked. Siam's proper name is Watagoo (my spelling is
probably off.) Therefore, when chanted properly it sounds somewhat
like "Oh, Watagoo Siam" and you do this over and over and faster
and faster until visions of large winged birds (that lay rather large
eggs) appear. At this point, rifts will be healed and the chanter
will have developed the most benificent knowledge available from
this particular technique.
Frederick
(With-tongue-firmly-in-my-own-cheek)
|
806.8 | one born every minute .... | MARKER::KALLIS | Anger's no replacement for reason | Thu Oct 13 1988 16:37 | 38 |
| The latest issue includes a front-page story about an "Archimedes
Healing Medallion," ostensibly a "rage in Europe." So, naturally,
on Page 6 is a full page ad on the very medallion.
One ad excerpt worth recording:
"First used by the Greeks, the Archimedes Healing Medallion was
a valued possession of sdome of the greatest minds of that era.
Homer refers to the Medallion in several of his writings, and Socrates
was said to have carried the Medallion with him at all times."
Having read both the _Iliad_ and the _Odyssey_, I can state that
the closest thing to a "healing medallion" was the magic herb, Moly
(a plant), by which Odyessus defeated the sorcery of Circe and returned
his men to human form (she'd changed them to swine). That was in
the latter work.
If the "Archimedes" of the medallion is supposed to be Archimedes
of Syracuse, arguably one of the three greatest mathematical minds
in human history, then there's a problem. He lived about 400 years
_after_ Homer and more than 100 years after Socrates, if the great
philosopher of the Platonic dialogues is meant. Of course, it could
have been any old Archimedes, since the name was not unknown.
However -- and here's the kicker -- the medallion is shown in magnified
detail, and the world is shown as a globe (possible: the Greeks,
particularly the Ancient ones, had figured that out before Archimedes),
but the Western Hemisphere, showing both American continents, is
featured (Africa and Europe can be seen near an edge, as can
Greenland); those details had to wait until after Columbus, _long_
after the time implied in the ad.
Of course, if I stopped you in the hall of a building, showed you
a Medallion, and told you that Plato carried one with him when he
taught his classes, I cvould advertise that it was "said" that Plato
did so ...
Steve Kallis, Jr.
|