Conference 7.286::sports_90

    
    Whaddya call a boomerang that won't come back?
    
      A F*****g stick!
    

    'Saw, you forgot the Sheep !
    
    Pom : correct spelling POHM. Originally a term for the original
          Australian inhabitants, Prisoner of his/her Majesty. I don't
          know how/when it came to mean the British.
    
    Did you know that Maories(sp?) from New Zealand do not use Boomerangs ?
    I have been reliably informed, that a Maories weopon never leaves his
    hand !!!!!!!     ;-)
    
    Explains a lot, eh ?
    
    Wayne.
    

Article 7 of aus.sport:
Subject: Results of Australian Women's National Basketball League
Date: 23 Jul 90 09:12:10 GMT
Sender: [email protected]

Noalunga        66      Coburg          50
AIS Pumas       74      Brisbane        60
North Adelaide  74      TIS Islanders   62
Brisbane        60      Canberra        57
TIS Islanders   75      West Adelaide   69
Perth           75      Coburg          69

League Standings

North Adelaide Rockets          114.8
Melbourne Tigers                119.1
TIS QUIT Islanders              123.8
Bulleen Boomers                 114.2
AIS Pumas                       107.7
Nunawading Spectres             118.0
Perth WAIS Breakers             106.2
Sydney Bruins                    99.6
Brisbane Bullets                 90.4
West Adelaide Fosters Bearcats   93.2
Canberra Civic Advance Capitals  75.2
Noarlunga City Tigers            74.7
Coburg Cougars                   76.9

    Thanks for posting that, Jeff, but could someone please translate for
    me?  :-)
    
    Shlep me once, shlep me twice, oh what the heck, shlep me many times!
    
    H�wk

    
    I'd just like to say how thrilled I am that you've seen fit 'Saw to
    create this 'ere topic for us Aussies. I'll see if I can get some real
    nice Aussie people to come note in here with you ..y'know.. some real
    good Aussie sports ..OK?
    
    Don
    *8-))))))))))

    
    I thought most Aussie sports involved sheep. 8^)
    
    Dickster
    

    Is this the voice of experience I hear?????   ;^)
    
    
    Wheel

    
    >>< Note 304.10 by WMOIS::JBARROWS "Was it good for you too?" >
                                         ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    
                 Not Baaaaahhhd.
    

    Dickster,
    
    hahahahaha.....ya got me!

re Don's thanks:  Don't mention it mate...


Re Pommeyland:

	I don't know how it could have turned around.  Perhaps
	in Australia, which did start out as a penal colony, and
	was then colonized by settlers when it became apparent that
	there was much trade to be had in the Pacific, it was a 
	kind of sarcastic retort that the English subject in England
	were actually the POHMs, and that the Aussies had a sort
	of freedom by not being in England...

	That's just a guess.  Perhaps Don could fill us in.


Think I'll practice driving on the wrong side of the road on the
way home tonight.  8^)  (no, no, just kidding)....


No one mentioned that other famous Aussie here in the States:  Jacko, or
whatever the f his name was...

'Saw

    RE: 8
    
    It tis' *great* to see, Don! (-8
    
    Jo

    Re .14
    
    Yer luvly, Jo. You can come out of the water ..I don't think they bite
    in 'ere .. "Right chaps??" hahaha
    
    Don
    *8-)

    Re .13
    
    Yeaaahh!! I'll give that a pass .. except that it was not trade in the
    Pacific that got the place jumping over here .. it was the discovery of
    gold by Edward Hargreaves - same bloke who discovered it in USA I think
    - that put this place on the map!!
    
    Don
    *8-)
    

    Jo's here!!!!!!!!!  Now all we need is Bliss to get in here....
    
    Wheel

There was a "short" article in todays Boston Herald concerning a rather 
unique Australian pastime.

Reprinted without permission.


ALBANY, N.Y. -  Gov. Mario Cuomo signed legislation yesterday banning dwarf
tossing and dwarf bowling in New York bars, which he called a "strange
diversion."  "Any activity which dehumanizes and humiliates these people
is degrading to us all," Cuomo said.  "This bill recognizes that and, 
in effect, declares these bizarre games to be debased."  

The bill, similar to one that became law in Florida last year, prohibits 
the games in any place that serves liquor.  That amounts to a ban, because
the events have never been popular in places that didn't sell liquor.

Dwarf tossing is a practice in which people pick up dwarfs, who are 
wearing harnesses, and heave them as far as possible into a padded target.

It has produced an offshoot, dwarf bowling, in which a helmeted dwarf is 
strapped to a skateboard and then rolled into bowling pins.  Both have
been held as competitions for cash prizes Cuomo said.

The games originated in Australia and made their way to the United States
about five years ago.

"Dwarf tossing belongs in the middle ages, not the modern age," said state
Sen. Nicholas Spano, a Westchester County Republican who sponsored the bill.

The legislation had been pushed by the Little People of America, a 4,000-
member organization founded in 1957 by actor Billy Barty.

The bill passed the legislature with only one dissenting vote, cast by
state Assemblyman Thomas Barraga, a Suffolk County Republican.

In his approval message yesterday, Cuomo said he was swayed by arguments
from dwarf advocates that the games "only perpetuate the outdated images
of dwarfs as court jesters or circus freaks" and also posed medical dangers.

Dwarf tossing gained its greatest exposure when it was featured last[ed] 
year on an episode of television's "L.A. Law."  In that episode, which was
recently rerun, a dwarf lawyer on the show was hired by a bar owner to 
defend the practice in court.



Chap

Re Don and Gold:

	Yeah, I forgot about that.  I'm reading this history of
	the war in the pacific, 1941-1945, and it deals with some
	of the history of who came to be where in the pacific, and
	it mentioned the trade thing...

Aussie Sports:

	I also forgot to mention surfing.  The Aussies, along with
	the California dude, and Hawaiians are the best surfers
	in the world....

'Saw

    Sorry I'm late..modem broke down. Here now.
    
    Don
    *8-)

    How's the football season shaping up?

    Re .21
    
    Full details to follow.
    
    Don
    *8-)

                         TIE ME KANGAROO DOWN, SPORT

                                by Rolf Harris



Recitation:

	There's an old Australian stockman, lying, dying,
	And he gets himself up on to one elbow,
	And he turns to his mates,
	Who are gathered 'round him
	And he says:


Watch me wallaby's feed, mate, 
Watch me wallaby's feed.
They're a dangerous breed, mate,
So watch me wallaby's feed.
			Altogether now!


Chorus:

        Tie me kangaroo down, sport,
        Tie me kangaroo down. 
        Tie me kangaroo down sport,
        Tie me kangaroo down.
        		Altogether now!
        
Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl,
Keep me cockatoo cool.
Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl,
Just keep me cockatoo cool.
			Altogether now!

Take me koala back, Jack,
Take me koala back.
He lives somewhere out on the track, Mac,
So take me koala back.
			Altogether now!

Let me abos go loose, Lew,
Let me abos go loose.
They're of no further use, Lew,
So let me abos go loose.
			Altogether now!

Mind me platypus duck, Bill,
Mind me platypus duck.
Don't let him go running amok, Bill,
Mind me platypus duck.
			Altogether now!

Play your didgeridoo, Blue,
Play your didgeridoo,
Keep playing 'til I shoot thro' Blue,
Play your didgeridoo.
			Altogether now!


Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred,
Tan me hide when I'm dead.
So we tanned his hide when he died Clyde,
(Spoken) And that's it hanging on the shed.
			Altogether now!
		


                                *     *     *

    Thank you!  I've always wondered what the verses were that I couldn't
    remember.
    
    Now, for a little further info - does this need further translation/
    explanation (I think)?  Like, I know most of these are animals unique
    to Oz, but what's a didgeridoo?  Is there any point in what he's asking
    be done to each, or is it just nonsense to make a rhyme?
    
    A&W

    
    A didgeriedoo is some kind of large, round, hollowed out pipe that
    produces a low note, something like a tuba.  I don't think there
    is a change in notes, but the "music" is produced in the various
    rhythms.  I think some of the "wah-wah" in the background of
    "Crockodile Dundee" if made with one of these suckers.
    
    Of course our own "Wizard of Oz" can elaborate, or perhaps one of
    our musical experts can schlep better than I.  I only know what
    I know about Didgeriedoos from watching "Dot and the Kangaroo" more
    than once.
    
    Dickster
    

I know that abbos is slang for aborigines, and I'm not sure
but I think they used to used to use aborigines as slaves...

So the release my abbos part relates to that I think....

'Saw

    What's a walaroo mate
    What's a walaroo

Easy, it's a cross between a wallaby and a kangaroo.

They both look the same (unless I was wick stoned that last time
I saw that rerun of Marlin Perkins selling insurance while Jim
boxed with a 'roo) and I think can be mated, similar to the way
donkeys and horses can be (or is it mules and horses...) Oh hell,
I slept through most of Biology 101 anyway....

8^)

    
    Re .25  Close ..awful close. It's a hollowed out gum tree branch.
    They're called "eucalypts" and are quite ubiquitous in California.
    
    I've blown a didgeriedoo ..best sound I could raise was a "Who f*rted?"
    response from those around me.
    
    twannanggannngganngg ..is supposed to be how it sounds.
    
    Don
    *8-)
    
    

    Re .26
    
    'Saw ..correct except in Tasmania ... they killed every last one there.
    
    
    Don
    *8-)

    Re .27
    
    A walaroo is a cross between a kangaroo and a wallaby ..if I remember
    correctly.
    
    Don
    *8-)

    RE: 19
    
    Yes very good for the eyes, that surfing sport! ;^)
    
    Jo

    I was a surfy chick in my younger days!
    
    OK, so I tried!
    
    OK, so I fell off!
    
    A lot! :^)
    
    re .17 Well, I made it, heard on the Grapevine about this topic and
    thought it would be very interesting! I follow Rugby League football
    and surfing, not much else I'm afraid. 
    
    	Anything you'd like to know and I might be able to help, let me
    know! 
    
    	Melissa (AKA Bliss)

    RE: 17
    
    Hi Joann! 
    
    Don't mind watch a bit of football myself, it is even better when the
    field is not so muddy and you can tell which team is which!
    
    Jo

    
    Ya gotta love a country that gave the world "Yahoo Serious."
    
    Dickster
    

    Re .35
    
    Who the heck is "Yahoo Serious"??
    
    Don
    *8-)

�    Who the heck is "Yahoo Serious"??

   He's an Aussie who starred in a movie released over here called `Young
   Einstein'.

   It was pretty bad.

   It was supposed to be funny.

   Maybe I was in a grouchy mood, or something. But I rented it at a Video
   Store, watched about 1/2 hr to 40 min., shut it off, and  started
   reading a book.

   Mike JN

    It was pretty bad! I saw it too because my sister who I felt was older
    and wiser laughed herself stupid in it..........hehehe Hmmmm It's a
    worry! ;^) 
    
    You don't know Yahoo Serious Don???? Our Don, the Trivia expert on
    Australia has not seen Young Einstein????
    
    Bliss

I watched the Aussies kick some good ol' US of A butt the other
evening in a Rugby match.  It was kind of like watching the
49ers beat up on the Broncos.  Final score was 62-9!  Ugh...

But, I really enjoyed listening to the Aussie announcers.  They
had me rolling a couple of times...

Anyway, if I came down to Australia, I'd find me a big cooler.
Fill it with ice and Aussie beer (might even try some of that
Redback stuff Don keeps telling me about), and head down to the
nearest beach.  Then, I'd spread out a blanket, open a beer
and just sit there and take it *all* in.....

Hmm, sounds like a helluva vacation!

'Saw

    RE: 39
    
    Mighty good beer that, Redback 'Saw (-8
    
    Jo

    Re previous.. no Bliss, I must admit that I've never seen Young
    Einstein.
    
    Re .38
    
    'Saw ..with that approach, you'll be accepted as one of us. In fact I
    live only about 4-5 minutes from one of those beaches where in summer
    you can do just as you've suggested. (I do in fact!)  Someone told me
    recently that you CAN get Redback in the USA.. I don't know if that's
    altogether true. Hey Bliss, it must be time for me to visit Sydney so
    we can sink a Redback or thirty again huh? (That lady has REAL taste!
    Purty too!)
    
    Don
    *8-)

Well, Don, perhaps this winter, when you folks are enjoying
your bodacious Aussie summer, I'll go deep into debt, buy
myself a plane ticket and come on down.

There's a commercial they run on the radio here, for Molson Golden
Ale, where this fellow goes camping, and all he brings with him
is this cooler full of Molson.  He doesn't even have an opener for
the beer, but as luck would have it, he bumps into this woman....

Well, I might do the same type of thing.  I'll show up in Australia
with nothing but a passport, a backpack and blanket, and some
dollars to change to pounds (you folks do use pounds down there
right?)

Then, I'll find a liquor store, buy some Redback, and find that
beach.    You'll know where I am, because Americans usually stick
out in a crowd anyway, and you all can come and see me on the
beach, and I'll share some beers with you...

Shoot, if I keep talking like this I just might do it...

'Saw

PS  If I show up down there, we've got to go to a rugby game, though....

It's getting late, I haven't seen my mates,
Tell me when the boys get here.
It's seven o'clock and I wanna rock,
and get a belly full of beer.....


oh yeah, it's Friday...can ya tell?  Is it time to go home yet?
Is it time to party yet?

'Saw

    
    Frank,
    
    Australia has dollars not pounds.  Also the Aussie $10 bill is the
    only bill with the picture of a convicted forger on it.
    
    Forget rugby go see some Aussie rules football with a couple of
    Sheilas.
    
    

>    Australia has dollars not pounds.  Also the Aussie $10 bill is the
>    only bill with the picture of a convicted forger on it.
>    
>    Forget rugby go see some Aussie rules football with a couple of
>    Sheilas.


Thanks dude.

I'll see some Aussie rules football too, unless the Sheilas are so
good they keep me right on the beach....    (Oh, it's Australia, I forgot,
I should say "Left" on the beach) ;^)

'Saw
    

    >Hey Bliss, it must be time for me to visit Sydney so
    >we can sink a Redback or thirty again huh? (That lady has REAL taste!
    >Purty too!)      
    
    In my time in Sydney, I tossed back a couple sixes of Redback.  Not bad
    beer, but I wasn't overly impressed.  Sorry.  You guys make great
    drinking beers, and I'd sooner down a couple of cans of Tooeys (sp?)
    than do the same with Buds, but I didn't find much for the connisseur
    in me.
    
    Dan

    RE .42
    
    'Saw,
    	  We have dollars and cents down under.. $A1 = $US0.75 or
    thereabouts.
    
    	As for rugby, that's for whimps.. we play Aussie Rules in Victoria.
    They play ugby in New South Wales...  up North o' here.
    
    Don
    *8-)

Fair enough....although some might dispute your rugby is for wimps statement.

One of these years I'll make it down there....

'Saw

    When is the Aussie Rules season?
    
    I should be in Australia in December/January for 3 weeks, and wouldn't
    mind catching a game - if I can talk the 'Sheila' into it...;-)
    
    JD

    Oh sure, see Fitzroy/St. Kilda but not Tigermania....
    

JD wimped because he knew that Slasher's been working on his lats
all year.  (Sorry, Lufay, Slasher's lats had yours beat by a tad or two).

But JD, you missed some heinously selfish hitting by WadeBaby.  He drove
in runs, could you believe...

And Greenwell made some MVP plays in the field.


'Saw

    Hey JD when you and your 'sheila' come on down under, you will have to
    stop in and say hi! (-8
    
    Bring your backpack down onto the beach 'Saw...I am sure that you will
    find a nice warm spot there...with your 6 pack of Redback ;^)
    
    Jo

    Re .49
    
    April thru end-September is Aussie Rules season.
    
    At the time you're suggesting, they will be in USAS giving demos of
    Aussie Rules.. some of them anyway. 
    
    Don
    *8-)

    I'll endeavour to put some interesting anecdote here over the
    weekend..now that I'm back from DECworld '90 in Canberra.
    
    
    Don
    *8-)

    RE: 54
    
    We is waiting Don! ;^)
    
    Jo

    I see that the World Women's Basketball Championship is to be held in
    Melbourne next year.. should be fun!
    
    Don
    *8-)
    

    I trust that you all noticed that Australians Wayne Gardner and Michael
    Doohan came 1st and 2nd in the Australian Grand Prix for 500ccc motor
    cycles on Sunday. Is there nothing at which us Aussies do not excell??
    
    Don
    *8-)
    

    �        Is there nothing at which us Aussies do not excell??

   speling and gramma?    

   Sorry Don, couldn't resist ;'D
   Mike JN

>>    �        Is there nothing at which us Aussies do not excell??

Sure, Don... motorcycle racing.  We all know that the best rider
ever was King Kenny, followed closely by my personal fav, Fast Eddie
Lawson, and then after that, we've got Wayne Rainey, and Kevin Schwanz.

We may agree on a lot of stuff, mate, but I guess 500cc MC racing is
where we split 8^)

Cheers to you anyway!

'Saw

    How does the Football season look?  Shouldn't the grand final be coming
    up soon?

    Sorry for the delay but I've been away... from Australia ..and cajoling
    my way around the world over past weeks.
    
    The Grand Final you're referring to must relate to Australian Rules
    Football ..since it's the only true edition.
    
    The Grand Final is over and done and Collingwood are premiers this
    year... beat poor old Essendon ..from memory.
    
    Don
    *8-)