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Conference misery::feline_v1

Title:Meower Power is Valuing Differences
Notice:FELINE_V1 is moving 1/11/94 5pm PST to MISERY
Moderator:MISERY::VANZUYLEN_RO
Created:Sun Feb 09 1986
Last Modified:Tue Jan 11 1994
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:5089
Total number of notes:60366

4444.0. "How to Retire a Cat" by CINAMN::FENTER () Fri Mar 08 1991 14:15

    This is a tough one.  
    
    My 78 year old mother has a cat that she has had for about 7 years,
    since the cat was a small kitten.  My mother is about to enter a
    retirement community that does not allow pets.  I can't take the cat. 
    I already have four, and this cat is definitely a loner almost to the
    point of being anti-social.  A one person cat.   Do I find a home for
    this cat (if I can) or have her put to sleep?  Whatever I do, my mother
    will be unhappy, at least for awhile.  She has  Alzheimer's and won't
    really remember why or how her cat is gone.  But I'll remember, and
    "aye, there's the rub".  I need advice.  
    
    The cat has to "move" by the second week in April, no sooner.  
    
    Help!
    
    Marilyn
    
    
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4444.1what about......USCTR1::MPELHAMLife NEVER ends, it just CHANGES!Fri Mar 08 1991 14:594
    There's always the humane society......for a small donation, they will
    take the cat & try to place he/she in a nice home.
    
    Good luck
4444.2He deserves a good home!!HSOMAI::CREBERFri Mar 08 1991 15:1312
    Marilyn,
    
    Seven years old is not old for cats.  I would think as long as the cat
    is healthy, why not put it up for adoption.  Maybe someone who reads
    this notesfile would prefer an older cat versus an untrained and active
    kitten.  Your mother might even be happy if she knows he is going to a
    good home.  Sounds like you have plenty of time (til April?).  
    
    regards,
    
    lynne creber
    
4444.3CUPMK::PHILBROOKCustomer Publications ConsultingFri Mar 08 1991 15:156
    The Humane Society may also help find a foster home if this could be a
    temporary situation.
    
    Cats are tough to place -- there are just so many of them. Good luck!
    
    Mike
4444.4I've Been Through this....BUFFER::WESTONFri Mar 08 1991 16:0942
    
    I have been there..........
    
    My Mom & Dad's cat "was" ------ 10 years old.  A bit over-weight, but
    healthy.  "Definitely" a one person cat (MOM & DAD) only!  Very
    tempermental, no good with kids, hissed and scratched ANYBODY else,
    even though she use to be my cat.
    
    My Mom & Dad move 2 years ago, this month into the home for the elderly
    for physical and safety sake in Fitchburg.  But.,.... no pets, just
    birds, were accepted.  I called, checked around and unless she was
    "placeable" no one wanted her.  My parents didn't want to know that
    she'd be CAGGED-UP and not love and left somewhere and maybe eventually
    put to sleep.  
    
    So their decision was to have her put to sleep by us and buried in my
    Pet Cemetary, which I have my dog and strays I've taken care of.  It
    was extremely hard, it was their last day in their old apartment, Dad
    left and Mom waited for me.  I had to to this alone.  But considering
    EVERYTHING, I had to put our feelings aside and think of the cat.  
    
    Missy would of never had a home, anywhere, that was a guarantee, so for
    my Mom & Dad's peace-of-mind, she was loved for 10 years, was getting
    old, would not be left abandoned in a cage or whatever, so she rests in
    Peace.
    
    We tried to get the housing authority to let them have her, but Federal
    Rules for there, would not budge.
    
    Now, 5 weeks ago, my Dad died after a very long illess.  I would give
    anything to have my Mom have a pet, especially a cat, but the rules
    have not changed.
    
    It will be difficult, if your Mom's cat is friendly, bring her to a
    NON-KILL shelter, Lancaster has one, and she will acclimate to the
    surroundings and hopefully get placed.
    
    Best Of Luck....
    
    Carol Weston
    
    
4444.5WILLEE::MERRITTMon Mar 11 1991 08:5814
    Tough tough decision.  I had a very similar experience when my Mom
    was so sick and we needed to do "something" with her nasty cat.
    This cat was also a one owner cat...who loved to attack anything
    that moved. (He was six at the time..)  Well the decision was not
    hard for me....I took the cat in.   I will always remember her face
    when I said "MOM we decided to keep Taffy".  I cherished that
    Nasty cat....scratches and all.   Both are gone now...but that
    memory is so clear.
    
    It looks like this decision is on your shoulders...and only you
    can do whats right.   My heart goes out for you because it is
    tough!
    
    Sandy 
4444.6AIMHI::OFFENMon Mar 11 1991 12:256
    I subscribe to *I Love Cats*  and I know of some places that will take
    your kitty.  Let me go home tonight and do some digging.  
    
    Sandi and the Storm Troopers
    
    
4444.7It's not an easy situation....BOOVX1::MANDILEMon Mar 11 1991 12:389
    As any feliner can attest to, it is hard enough to
    make "that" decision when a beloved pet is ill...
    It's 100 times as hard with this type of situation.
    Re .5 - I know that look your mom must have had...
    Joy mixed in with the relief that her "baby" will
    be o.k.  If anything happens to my familys pets, I
    would not hesitate to give them a home.
                                               
    Lynne
4444.8Try to place her.CRUISE::NDCPutiput Scottish Folds DTN:297-2313Tue Mar 12 1991 08:0321
    Not too long ago, at the request of my vet, I posted an adoption
    notice for Buffy, a six year old cat whose owner was moving into
    elderly housing.  Not too long after that the cat was adopted
    by a feliner's mother and as far as I know is living happily in
    Maynard.  
    
    Buffy's former owner had the pleasure of meeting Buffy's new owner
    and I know it meant so much to her that her beloved cat would be
    cared for.  
    
    I fail to understand, in light of the research that clearly
    demonstrates the benefits of pets for the elderly, why our society
    insists on ripping people from their furry family members!
    
    I say post an adoption notice and work on a fosterhome or nokill
    shelter as a backup.  Don't even consider euthanasia until you
    absolutely must.
    
    Think Positively.
      Nancy DC
    
4444.9There is hopePROSE::GOGOLINA sunset girl in a midnight townTue Mar 12 1991 11:1439
    Yes, Buffy is alive, well, and happy, living in the lap of kitty luxury 
    with my mother. When I first saw Nancy's ad for Buffy, it seemed like 
    a perfect match; my mother is also elderly and had just become catless. 
    Buffy did not have to change his lifestyle; my mother even lives in the 
    same type of house that Buffy was used to. Everyone seems to be very 
    happy with the way things worked out. In addition, we've made a new 
    friend. We all keep in touch with phone calls and letters, and hope to 
    have Margaret come out and visit Buffy and my mother in the spring.

    There are other success stories of cats older than your mom's being 
    adopted, too. I adopted a 12-year-old cat as a companion for my (now 
    deceased) 17-year-old cat; Misty is now almost 17 herself. At the last 
    cat show I went to I saw a nice couple adopt a 10-year-old shelter cat. 
    Currently living with me is an 11-year-old foster kitty with no teeth; 
    her elderly owner had to go into the hospital and could no longer care 
    for her. Bright is a real charmer, and a couple of people are interested 
    in her.

    I'd say you don't have anything to lose by trying to find a home for 
    your mother's cat. You have some time, so why not take a chance? The 
    important thing is to spread the word as much as possible. You could 
    start by entering an adoption note here in Feline. Some vets have 
    bulletin boards in their waiting rooms for ads. You could run an ad in 
    the paper (that's how I found Misty). (Be prepared with questions you 
    want to ask prospective owners so you know if they will give her a good 
    home.) If those things don't work you can try to get her into a no-kill 
    shelter; it might be a good idea to start calling around now to see if 
    space is available. 

    If all else fails, would it be so bad if you were to just keep her? She 
    would be a tie with your mom. If you think the kitty wouldn't get along
    with your other cats, maybe you could keep her separated from them, at 
    least while you're not home? Cats can change; she might surprise you and 
    blossom (or at least loosen up) in a different environment.

    Wishing you the best of luck with your very difficult situation. 

    Linda, Misty, Cubby, Toby, Tweetie, Peanut, 
           and foster kitties Sunny & Bright
4444.10Keep hope alive when possible...BUFFER::WESTONThu Mar 14 1991 14:2715
    
    After adding what we went through, and seeing the results of those in
    similar situations, I had to add one more thing.
    
    It was the hardest thing I had to do.
    
    I had no choice.  No one, even a shelter wanted her then, and my
    husband was alergic to her dander.  No one else in the family has cats.
    
    So for those who could be placed and/or adopted do so.  It's something
    I will always feel bad about.
    
    Carol