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Conference misery::feline_v1

Title:	Meower Power is Valuing Differences
Notice:	FELINE_V1 is moving 1/11/94 5pm PST to MISERY
Moderator:	MISERY::VANZUYLEN_RO

Created:	Sun Feb 09 1986
Last Modified:	Tue Jan 11 1994
Last Successful Update:	Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:	5089
Total number of notes:	60366

4332.0. "A Cats Prayer" by AIMHI::MCCURDY () Fri Jan 25 1991 13:07

     This was printed in Thursday nites edition of  my local paper.
    I thought I would share it with all of you. 
    
    
                A  Cats Prayer
    
      Now hear this!!!!You may live in this dwellig with me, but
      keep in mind your sole purpose for existance is to care
       for me. I pray God keeps you able to do so.
         Feed me well and promptly, so that I may then find
        a quiet place to lie down and stare at you. If
       that place happens to be the top of the television
    set, do not keep trying to dislodge me even though
     my tail is hanging in the middle of the picture.
       I expect full run of the premises, including
       the Kitchen table. I sniff your food only
       to see if I would prefer it to mine. Brush me twice
       a week. Pet me as often as you wish, but I can do
    with out the idiotic statements you utter as you do
     so.
     When I bump my head aganist your leg or cheek, it
    means that I accept you as part of my environment.
     Keep in mind that if I thought the lady next door
    would  feed me better I would be out of here in
    a minute. If you are looking for loyalty, get
    a dog.
     *** Reprinted without Permission**
    
    Er um, Argus and the FIRM..I hope I am not giving
    away any Kitty Secrets..

T.R	Title	User	Personal Name	Date	Lines
4332.1		JJLIET::JUDY	Just get here if you can	`Fri Jan 25 1991 13:32`	5
	That is great! thanks for posting it Kate. JJ
4332.2		WILLEE::MERRITT		`Mon Jan 28 1991 08:29`	7
	That was a wonderful kitty prayer....it sounds like my bunch have memorized each line. You can't live with them...but you can't live without them. Thanks for posting it!! Sandy
4332.3	Humans will no longer beable to plead "Ignorance of the Law"	EMASS::SKALTSIS	Deb	`Mon Jan 28 1991 13:38`	6
	The FIRM hopes that all pet humans read and heed, or they will be targets, er, liable for litagation. The Lovely Pip S. Pussycat, Esq. Sr. Head Pussycat of Pussycat,Pussycat,Pussycat,Pussycat,Pussycat,Pussycat, Pussycat,Pussycat,Pussycat & Pussycat
4332.4	a show of public support?..Purrchance..???	AIMHI::MCCURDY		`Tue Jan 29 1991 12:53`	10
	Boy.. I was really worried.. I was afraid I was giving away kitty trade secrets.. I feel better knowing that the FIRM appears to be "publicly supporting my memo." Hmmm.. perhaps Argus and the Lovely Miss Pip will grant me "consultant status" at The FIRM.... as well as one of those lovely "gift certificates they were pushing at Christmas.. er um I mean that YULE Marketing Campaign that netted certain clients those very nicely done gift certificates.. Kate..
4332.5	Be real!	EMASS::SKALTSIS	Deb	`Tue Jan 29 1991 13:09`	12
	Dear Mere Human Kate, I'm afraid that the FIRM only hires and represents those of the feline species, but because so many kitties read this file from their human's at home terminal,we feel that you have done a great public service by making more felines aware of their rights and their place of natural superiority in the household. As a result, and to show our appreciation to Happy and Prechie, the next time they level charges the firm will take only half of our regular 33% commission. The Lovely MS Pip S. Pussycat, Esq. Dictated (of course) but not read
4332.6	.. that is 2 for lunch ovelooking the pond..	AIMHI::MCCURDY		`Tue Jan 29 1991 13:35`	9
	To : The Lovely MS.Pip Et. al... I do understand your position. If I have overstepped my bounds, please forgive me. I did however recieve a call from Argus J. Pussycat ESQ. indicating that we should meet over lunch to discuss some issues.. I was assuming he was refering to my consultants position with the FIRM. Gee I wonder why he wants to meet with me.. ... Er um MS Pip.. would you know?. Kate
4332.7	I reccommend you DON'T GO! AJP will stick you with the bill, too.)	EMASS::SKALTSIS	Deb	`Tue Jan 29 1991 13:56`	8
	Kate, they wouldn't tell me, but I overheard something about "serving a summons". I guess that if a member of the FIRM serves you the summons, they don't have to pay an outside party to do it. Something about "Keeping the work inside". Deb
4332.8		CRUISE::NDC	Putiput Scottish Folds DTN:297-2313	`Wed Jan 30 1991 07:49`	5
	Well, I refuse to let my gang read that note! They're bad enough already! Scottish folds feel that their position in life is in the middle of all the action! And that attitude is contagious to the rest of the gang (except Bob who is really a dog in a cat suit). Nancy