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Conference misery::feline_v1

Title:Meower Power is Valuing Differences
Notice:FELINE_V1 is moving 1/11/94 5pm PST to MISERY
Moderator:MISERY::VANZUYLEN_RO
Created:Sun Feb 09 1986
Last Modified:Tue Jan 11 1994
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:5089
Total number of notes:60366

3065.0. "Goodbye Cinamon" by SPUNKI::LUBY (DTN 287-3204) Mon Nov 20 1989 10:04

	I just had to make the most painful decision of my life.
	Yesterday, I noticed that 15 year old Cinamon was in some
	pain around his tail area.  I took a look and his genitals
	were all swollen.  I was worried about another cystitis
	attack so I took him to the emergency vet.  They had to
	sedate him to examine his so the vet suggested I leave.
	I told him about the blood around Cinamons mouth (remember
	I was worried about him losing his teeth).  He said that
	he would take a look.

	Late yesterday afternoon the vet called to tell me that 
	Cinamon was severly constipated but he was able to relieve
	that problem.  But then the bad news... the blood around
	his mouth was caused by a tumor under his tongue which 
	was inoperable.  He told me that Cinamon could have any
	where from a few weeks to a few months left to live.
	
	I thought alot about what the vet said then started thinking
	about Cinamons life lately.  Since I got him from my parents
	in early October he has rapidly deteriorated.  He had a
	real hard time eating and he was not grooming his self much.
	About 3 weeks ago I first noticed the blood and about 1 week
	ago he started to smell.  Since then I have been unable
	to let him sleep on my bed with me and it hasn't been very
	pleasant to cuddle him and pet him.  I felt bad about the
	way that I had been treating him and I knew that if I brought
	him home he wouldn't be happy.  I didn't want to see him
	deteriorate any more - its too painful to me and I felt so
	guilty.  I called my parents and let them make the decision.
	When they called me back, I knew what they were going to
	say.  I spent most of last night awake agonizing over the
	decision and trying to decide if I could handle visiting him
	one last time. 

	I was going to call the vet from work and tell him my decision
	but on the way to work I turned around and went to the vets.
	I brushed Cinamon and he purred and I almost changed my mind
	except he smelled so bad that I remembered what it would be
	like for him if I brought him home.  When I left at 8:30 I
	asked them to wait an hour so I could drive to work.  I also
	asked them to brush him as he was going to sleep.

	I hope I did the right thing.  It hurts so bad right now.
	I hope he knows that I love him and that I did it for him.

	Karen

T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
3065.1We're so sorry!MEMIT::MISSELHORNMon Nov 20 1989 10:2311
    Oh, Karen, I'm so sorry.  My eyes are filled and my heart hurts
    with you.  You did the very best that you could for Cinamon
    and loved him enough to give him up and not let him suffer.  
    That is the greatest love of all!
    
    And, at this Thanksgiving time, try to remember that you had
    the joy of sharing love and life with Cinamon for 15 happy years.
    
    Our love and prayers are with you.
    
    Barbara (Melody, Missy and Brittany)
3065.2NRADM::CONGERWhat's ONE more cat????Mon Nov 20 1989 11:076
    
    
    	Karen, I'm very sorry to hear about Cinamon...
    
    	Sherry & Rosie, Missy, and Squeek
                
3065.3AIADM::FEASEAndrea Midtmoen FeaseMon Nov 20 1989 11:467
         Oh, Karen, I'm so sorry.  Cinamon's purring was probably his way
    of saying "I understand, it's okay, I love you."
    
         Here's a *hug* for you ...
    
    					- Andrea
    
3065.4*Tears in mine too*AIMHI::OFFENMon Nov 20 1989 12:3710
    Oh Karen,
    
    I was SO SORRY to read this note.  I know how much you loved Cinamon.
    
    You definitely did the right thing even thou it hurts.  Here's another
    hug from me and my gang too.  
    
    Sandi & Thunder, Lightning, Storm & DejaVu too.
    
    
3065.5GWEN::MORRISSEYDraculetteMon Nov 20 1989 12:558
    
    
    	Karen,
    
    	I'm so sorry.  You did the right thing for putting Cinamon
    	out of his pain.  And he knows and loves you for that.
    
    	JJ (also with tears in her eyes)
3065.6So SorryCGVAX2::LANDRYMon Nov 20 1989 13:2514
    Karen,
    
    Even tho I do not write alot to this file, I read it every day.
    And there have been some nice stories about Cinamon.  It must
    have been very hard for you to make that decision.
    
    You did the right thing, and now he is in Kitty heaven with all
    the other babies that have passed on.
    
    With tears in my eyes,
    
    Anna/Zildjian/Spunks
    
    
3065.7we know how you feelPARITY::DENISEAnd may the traffic be with youMon Nov 20 1989 13:339
    
              Oh, I don't how you could drive to work...you must be
    having a REAL Monday.  I know how unbearably painful it was for
    my 3 with FELV last year.  But I know it was best thing to do.
    Cinamon will understand. It almost seems like Cinamon was someone
    I knew even though I never met him, just because of all the notes
    in this file.  We're all so sad for you.
    
                                       Denise
3065.8That's SHAYNE, not ShyaneNZOV01::PARKINSONReunite Gondwannaland!Mon Nov 20 1989 13:5910
    Karen,
    
    What a gap in your life. You were very brave to let Cinamon be released
    from the discomfort. You'll always have the memories, though, of
    what Cinamon meant to you when you were growing up, and it's wonderful
    that you've been able to have him stay with you these last couple
    of years. I hope your little ones give you lots of extra hugs.
    
    Condolences,
    Shyane (New Zealand)
3065.9CIRCUS::KOLLINGKaren/Sweetie/Holly/Little Bit Ca.Mon Nov 20 1989 14:006
    I'm so sorry about Cinnamon.  It was so difficult for you, but
    I'm sure you did the right thing for him. I just looked at his lovely
    picture in my feline photograph album.  dear Cinnamon.
    
    Karen
    
3065.10They will each have a playmateFORTSC::GRAFTONMon Nov 20 1989 14:0612
    Karen,
    
    May Cinnamon and LandShark go to the next world arm-in-arm today.  As
    much as my own heart aches for LandShark, it aches for Cinnamon, too.
    
    Although we may have to repeat this many times before we believe it:
    we did what we could.
    
    Bless you,
    
    Jill
    
3065.11SANFAN::FOSSATJUMon Nov 20 1989 14:257
    I know that it's so hard to let go and we always wonder if we are
    doing the right thing.  I've had to remind myself that it's the
    quality of the life we provide our friends.  My prayers are with
    you.
    
    
    Giudi, Pippin, Gino & Stitch
3065.12Hugs from New HampshireBIMINI::SPINGLERMon Nov 20 1989 14:389
    
    
    I'm so sorry for your loss, Cinamon understands.  My prayers for
    peace for both of you.
    
    Feline So Sad,
    
    Sue & Panther & Spot
    
3065.13Our deepest sympathyGENRAL::BALDRIDGEFall has fellMon Nov 20 1989 15:357
    How hard to read nearly succesive notes of such sadness.
    
    We're sorry to hear of Cinnamon's passing.  Our hearts go out to you
    in this very difficult time.
    
    Chuck, Jane, Doobie, Peaches and Cassandra
    
3065.14CRUISE::NDCDTN: 297-2313Mon Nov 20 1989 18:129
    I'm very sorry to hear about Cinnamon and hope I will have your
    courage when the time comes for me to release one of my kitties.
    I'm glad you said good-bye.  When my parents made the decision to
    put our dog to sleep 10 yrs ago (she was just 16) I went and said
    good-bye to her.  I'm very glad I did.
    
    I'll add Cinnamon's name to the Silver Lining Memorial List for
    this quarter.  I hope it brings some small comfort.
      Nancy DC
3065.15CinamonPOCUS::FCOLLINSMon Nov 20 1989 20:216
    Karen, I'm also sorry for you and hope that you can find comfort
    in that Cinamon is at rest and knew what it was to be loved.
    
    With tears too.
    
    Flo
3065.16EXITSPUNKI::LUBYDTN 287-3204Tue Nov 21 1989 10:2726
	Thank you so much for your support.  I couldn't make it though the
	day yesterday.  I had only 2-3 hours sleep Sunday night and was
	just too emotional to stay at work.  I went home and slept on the
	couch with T.K. and Bandit - they were so comforting to have 
	there, especially when I walked in the door and knew that Cinamon
	would never be coming home again.  

	I cried so many tears on Cinamon when I was growing up but 
	yesterday, it was Bandit and T.K. who got cried on.  I think
	they knew there was a problem.  Even the normally rambunctious
	T.K. was quiet.

	I called my parents again last night to let them know that it
	was over.  Cinamon was really a favorite of my father and I could
	hear his voice choking when I told him that I was going to blow
	up a photo and give it to him for Christmas.  I spent Sunday night
	looking through all my negatives and found 4-5 great pictures
	of Cinamon.  They were all taken on past Christmases, a favorite
	time of year for Cinamon.  It will be sad not having Cinamon
	shooting through the paper and ribbons and curled up in the empty
	boxes.  At least T.K. and Bandit will be there when my parents
	come up from Florida for Christmas.  Those two can liven up any
	party and it may make Christmas without Cinamon less painful.

	Karen
3065.17We're so sorry....SWAT::COCHRANEEthel The Ardvaark Goes Quantity SurveyingTue Nov 21 1989 11:366
    I'm so sorry to hear about Cinamon.  Please accept our
    condolences.  I'm sure he knew how much you loved him,
    and that your decision was the best for him.
    
    Mary-Michael, Niniane, Charm, Dream, Boogie, Mips
    and Belle
3065.18WR2FOR::HARPHAM_LYTue Nov 21 1989 17:1821
    
    Karen,
    
    Molly and Iago and I extend our sympathies to you over the difficult
    time you've just been through with Cinnamon.  You did the right
    thing  -you eased Cinnamon's suffering, even at the expense of
    increasing your own, which is a tremendous act of love.  Undoubtedly,
    he is sitting somewhere right now, purring contently, watching over
    you.  It sounds like he was always a well-loved kitty, and probably
    had a wonderful kitty-life.  
    
    You'll miss him for a long time, as I still miss Abbey, and even
    Cricket who died a few years ago at the age of 17.  He was a childhood
    pal too, which I think somehow makes them even more special.  But
    try to remember him fondly and with warm memories, rather than sadness.
    I'm sure this is what your sweet Cinnamon would want.
                           
    With warm hearts and purrs,
    Lynn, Molly and Iago
    
    
3065.19Good Hunting Cinnamon!CSC32::K_KINNEYTue Nov 21 1989 19:057
    
    
    	Cinnamon was with you during some good times too.
    	When you remember him, remember those and wish him
    	good hunting on his journey to the place that promises
    	warm sunny days and no more pain.
    					kim and "the Nipper!"
3065.20think of the good timesVOGON::KCAMPBELLsatsuma seasonWed Nov 22 1989 11:289
    Karen
    
    I'm so sorry to hear about Cinamon.
    
    My thoughts are with you at such a sad time.
    
    Regards,
    
    Karen (and Georgie)
3065.21Your lossHOTAIR::SIMONHugs Welcome Anytime!Wed Nov 22 1989 11:5015
    Karen,
    
    	I, too, am so sorry about Cinamon.  It must have been such a hard
    decision to make.  As others have said, remember the good times.  Know
    how much love you shared with him.
    
    	The love of an animal is so special.  You can give love and get
    love and nothing is expected in return.  You were blessed with 15
    years of sharing that special love.  Remember it; Cherish it; There is
    nothing so satisfying as to have shared that love.
    
    	What you did was right.  You did it because you cared and wanted
    the best.  My thoughts go out to you.
    
    Denise
3065.22PEKING::NAGLEJFUNKY COLD RIBENAWed Nov 22 1989 12:2613
    
    Sorry to read about your cat. A friend of mine went through the
    same ordeal over the weekend. Beasly, who was 9 months old,
    had to be put to sleep. He had a tumour on his brain.

    All I can say is don't despair too much as there are many people
    around with a kind word.
    
    I don't often get a lump in my throat either.
    
    Regards,
    
    Jeff.
3065.23Us too!GOBO::PELUSOMaster the MomentWed Nov 22 1989 13:154
    We sorry to hear about Cinnamon....
    
    Michele & Nippa
    
3065.24more condolencesCSCOA5::MCFARLAND_Djust call me dunwoody diWed Nov 22 1989 16:078
    
    please add our condolences to those of all the caring folks on this
    conference.  there sure seems to be some rough karma affecting all our
    feline friends these days.  may t.k. and bandit help ease the pain in
    your heart...
    
    diane, stella, stanley
    
3065.25R.I.P. CinamonLESCOM::KALLISTime takes things.Mon Nov 27 1989 13:443
    Add my condolences.
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr.
3065.26I'm so sorry, tooCLUSTA::TAMIRACMS design while-u-waitMon Nov 27 1989 14:0910
    So many sad notes since I've been away....
    
    Karen and Jill,
    
    My sympathies to you both on your losses. I wonder if they have DEC
    feline badges in heaven...
    
    So sorry,
    Mary +4
    
3065.27snif!SMURF::PARADISWorshipper of BacchusMon Nov 27 1989 15:338
    Karen,
    
    I couldn't help choking back a tear as I read your story too... our
    deepest condolences.  Still, it's better that Cinnamon rest peacefully
    now than waste away in pain...
    
    Jim & Tamara (& Athena & Cleo & Chalkie & Ralph & Ebony & Sparrowhawk)
    
3065.28sad month in this note file.WILKIE::IVESMon Nov 27 1989 23:184
    Karen, sorry to hear that Cinnamon lost the battle of aging. What
    an enemy death is.
    
    Barbara