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Conference misery::feline_v1

Title:Meower Power is Valuing Differences
Notice:FELINE_V1 is moving 1/11/94 5pm PST to MISERY
Moderator:MISERY::VANZUYLEN_RO
Created:Sun Feb 09 1986
Last Modified:Tue Jan 11 1994
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:5089
Total number of notes:60366

1369.0. "A FRIEND FOR BENSON?" by MARRHQ::SRUTLEDGE () Fri May 13 1988 12:24

    A very good friend who frequently writes in this notesfile
    is very involved with the local SPCA function.  We've been
    concerned about the overwhelming 'kitty' population at the
    SPCA and unfortunately we know what happens when they don't
    get adopted.  
    
    I'm very interested in welcoming a new little face to my
    home but I've already got a 7 year old Tabby named Benson.
    Benson has never been around other cats - he's strictly an
    indoor cat.  (I'm an overprotective mom).
    
    Does anyone know how he might react if I brought another
    cat home?  Benson is extremely territorial and I don't know
    if he would accept sharing with another cat.  I'd like to
    know that in a small way I was helping by providing a good
    home to cat in need.
    
    Any suggestions or information would be greatly appreciated.
    
    Thanks, Sandie
      
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1369.1CIRCUS::KOLLINGKaren, Sweetie, & Holly; in Calif.Fri May 13 1988 14:5613
    Introducing a new cat seems to have a wide spectrum of results --
    I've heard everything from love at first sight to pandemonium for
    a couple of months.  Holly is also very territorial, she and Sweetie
    adapted after about two months, during which I kept them separated
    while I was at work for the first few weeks (as I recall), and I
    often woke up at night to hair-raising howls.  Now they are like
    little kids -- sometimes they sleep together, they play together,
    sometimes they wrestle (but no one gets seriously hurt).  I am glad
    I have two because there is no question that they provide company
    for each other when I am at work, and during my once-a-year vacation
    for two weeks, I come home to happy cats, as opposed to one cat
    who has made his throat sore from crying.
    
1369.2Thoughts on adding new catsSKITZD::WILDEBeing clever is tiring..Fri May 13 1988 15:0033
>    Does anyone know how he might react if I brought another
>    cat home?  Benson is extremely territorial and I don't know
>    if he would accept sharing with another cat.  I'd like to
>    know that in a small way I was helping by providing a good
>    home to cat in need.
    
Suggestion:

Female, spayed, adult or near adult - no kitten...he won't be overjoyed,
and you will have to give it time..and accept the fact that there will
always occasionally be little hassles between them.  Now, when I say
time, I mean TIME....expect problems for UP TO a month or more..HOWEVER,
it is highly unlikely the cats will ever hurt one another...or even
THINK about actually hurting one another....they will probably hiss and
spit, and growl loudly to express the outrage of the situation..they
will each select areas of the house that are "territory" and will
settle in.  I really do believe that YOUR ATTITUDE controls a lot of
the trauma of the situation.  I've known people who isolated the cats
for days, and worried about the possible problems so much I think they
may have passed on the anxiety.  I've also known people (myself
included) who simply provide a second cat box and feeding station
in a room the new cat can "protect" if she wants to (spare bedroom?)
and set them both loose in the house.  I make sure my resident kittys
get lots of cuddles and pets, and I make sure the new cat gets visited
in her room at least once a day for cuddles and pets.  In a few days
the new cat will get curious, venture out, and the hissing and growling
will commence....

it DOES work - my 3 cats are all rescue cases that I've acquired at
different times...one recommendation I will emphasise - unless they've
be raised together, two males won't adapt too well.  The ideal seems
to be opposite sex...this from my and my friend's experiences - others
may know of different situations. 
1369.3Mine survived!MARRHQ::KORCHNAKFri May 13 1988 15:2035
    I'm the very good friend that works at the local SPCA in Annapolis,
    MD. And from the time that Benson is at home, I recommended that
    she should consider getting him a friend! And yes, of the opposite
    sex!
    
    I have a 2 year old, Charlie, which about a year ago I decided to
    get him a friend. What prompted this was his attitude -- if we left
    him alone for ANY length of time, I would find various things on
    the floor -- pencils, pens, flower vases, computer keyboards, you
    know, "normal" things.  Well, I went to the SPCA and found this
    cat that just was practically crawling through the spaces in the
    cage she was in, and fell in love! When we got her home, Charlie
    sniffed her, she hissed, and hissed, and hissed. He did nothing!
    But sniff, and sniff. I separated them for about a week (she had
    a case of conjunctivitis) and they "communicated" underneath a door.
    When she was recovered, we'd supervise them while they were together.
    Charlie watched her, and anytime he got near she would hiss. This
    lasted about 2 weeks. AFter that, they were wrestling, cleaning
    each other, like they had known each other for years!
    
    Charlie is now a MUCH calmer cat, and we haven't had a computer
    keyboard knocked over in over a year! Occassionally PLANTS get abused,
    but that's the extent of it!
    
    I have to say that I'm glad I got Charlie a friend, because they
    are much happier! And I am too, cause I saved 2 cats from the "electric
    chair"! If Sandie SHOULD decide to get another cat, she will definitely
    have to be prepared for some problems at first, but with the proper
    hugs and attention, BOTH cats will be happy!
    
    BTW: our SPCA does not normally put animals to sleep; this is done
    ONLY when the population is so high that there is no other alternative.
    And it's getting extremely close. I wish I had a house big enough
    for all of them!
    
1369.4Are you sure they won't hurt each other?SCOMAN::BARRYFri May 13 1988 16:1328
    .2
    
    You said that cats won't hurt each other...  I hope you are right
    as I am going through this process now too.  I got a kitten 2 weeks
    ago and Tiggy is not thrilled.  However, what worries me is a story
    a friend of mine told about 2 of her cats.
    
    This friend had an adult male cat and an adult female cat and then
    brought in a female kitten.  One day the adult male came into the
    kitchen and dropped the kitten on the floor.  Well I guess there
    was blood everywhere, the kitten had been bitten through the neck
    and lay on the floor having spasms!  Needless to say the kitten
    was rushed to the vet where they found that a nerve had been 
    damaged.  The kitten survived and is a beautiful cat now but very
    skittish (sp?).  The funny thing is that now she and the male cat
    are the best of friends!  So this leaves one question???  Was the
    cat just playing and got carried away, or will an adult cat hurt
    a kitten like that on purpose?!?!?  Of course, I suppose maybe the
    only ones that can answer that are the cats???
    
    Anyway, as a result of that and another story (a friends puppy just
    got her eyeball punchured by their cat) I AM anxious about leaving
    my 2 alone together!  But at the same time am willing to admit that
    maybe I am worrying too much!  What do you think???  Tiggy does
    slap Al around a lot the last 2 or 3 days!  But Al keeps coming
    back for more!!!
    
    Lesa
1369.5CIRCUS::KOLLINGKaren, Sweetie, & Holly; in Calif.Fri May 13 1988 16:2112
    I didn't dare leave Holly and Sweetie together when I wasn't there
    at first -- the noises were blood-curdling, so I was afraid they
    (or to be more accurate, Holly-the-demon) would hurt each other.
    I did have to break them apart a couple of times before this.  Now
    that things have settled down into "normal sibling rivalry", the
    worst that happens is like, if Holly is being cuddled she might
    wave Sweetie away with a paw with claws extended, or maybe twice a
    year I find a little place on Sweetie where he's been nipped.
    But 90% f the time they are best buddies.
    
    So, I would keep a close watch at first until things settle down.
    
1369.6more on the subjectSKITZD::WILDEBeing clever is tiring..Fri May 13 1988 17:1034
This is from a friend who used to breed cats:

An adult male will OFTEN HURT small kittens - she never allowed her males
around new litters without total alert supervision.  They are not like
human daddies, they have no recognition of the kitten as being "theirs"
and, in fact, she has known of cases in which kittens have been eaten
by adult male cats....NOT OFTEN, but it has happened.  That is why I
recommend adding a larger, adult or near adult FEMALE cat to the household
of an adult male cat - the larger size and opposite sex are both
incentives for the "wars" to come to be of the "shove-and-shove-back"
variety, rather than real attempts to injur one another...this is
not to say that injuries CAN'T occur, scratched eyes can happen even
among rowdy friends..but, it us unlikely to happen...even when the
cats are yowling and screeching and wrestling - in most cases, the most
that will happen is that fur will fly.

ALL of the above can be countered with "horror stories" of cats trying
to really kill each other, etc.  I think you have to choose a cat that
has been a household pet (she will be friendly to people, not really
shy or protective) and you have to give her and your cat time to get
to know each other...and let the cats tell you how they will play it.
If they are really hostile, maybe you will feel it is necessary to
separate them.  HOWEVER, the longer you let the resident cat think that
when he throws a tantrum the "invader" goes away, the longer you are
likely to have tantrums thrown at you...AND remember YOU are the main
issue of contention between the two cats - you and your territory are
what the cats are fighting over as the resident cat doesn't want to
share you.  When you aren't there, they will probably settle to their
respective corners and glare at each other.  Mine did - we left the
house and then quietly came back and peeked in to find everyone
ignoring each other....in fact, they all fell asleep!

Hang in there, its worth it every time I see Hannah, Nick, and Sam
all playing tag through the house...
1369.7Maybe try a field test?VAXWRK::LEVINEFri May 13 1988 17:1155
I got Shamus when he was 10-12 weeks old two years ago April.  I had planned
on getting 2 kittens at the same time, but it wasn't prime kitten season and
there was very little selection at Angel Memorial (MSPCA).  I knew it would
be easier to get another in about 2 months.  At the end of those 2 months,
I really agonized about getting another cat.  I really wanted another but
wondered how Shamus would react to no longer having all of my attention.
But I bit the bullet and brought Daisy home in early June.

Now Daisy was about 6-7 weeks old and weighed somewhere between one and
two pounds - I could hold her in the palm of my hand.  Shamus was at least
4 or 5 pounds by then and he terrorized her for the first day or two.  I was
most worried that he would crush her, because he played very hard with her.
Daisy learned to hold her own, very quickly becoming dominant cat although
I still had to break up "play" sessions on occassion when I heard her cry
out.  But they became best buddies pretty quickly.

This winter, I began to think about getting some more.  The plan I adopted
was to cat-sit for various friends to see how my cats would adjust to new
cats in the house.  In February, I had 2 female kittens for about 10 days.
The first day had it's moments and there were skirmishes for about 3 days,
but things settled down very quickly.  Life would have been wonderful except
that one of the kittens went into heat, but that's another story.

This past month, I had a friend's cats for about 4 weeks.  They were both
adult (7 and 8 years old), one male and one female.  The guest cats were
very disoriented at first since they weren't on their home turf.  I know
what you mean about howling - these two cats could have done the sound
effects for "The Excorcist".  I kept the male in my basement for a day
until he adjusted.  The female is pretty schizzy to begin with and she
spent a month under my bed coming out only to eat, drink, and use the
litter box.  None of them got along famously with my cats; it was sort
of a cold war where they would tolerate each other and there were little
skirmishes the entire time I had them, but nobody sustained bodily harm.
The guest male is an extremely jealous cat who tried various forms of
sabotage whenever I was being affectionate with one of my cats and I
found that to be the most draining thing.  I was happy to see them go
and have decided to stick with my own 2 cats and not get any more.  I
will be cat-sitting the kittens previously mentioned again at the end
of this month for about 10 days and am looking forward to that.  I may
also have 2 other kittens for 1-2 weeks sometime this summer.

The point of all this rambling is that you can never really know how
your cat will react until you do it and the reaction might be different
with different cats.  I have found that the adjustment is much easier
when the new cat is a kitten since kittens seem to be more adaptable and
the adult cats aren't as threatened.  The worst fit seems to be 2 adult
males since all sorts of territorial issues seem to surface.

It might be worthwhile to try a "field-test" to see how your cat reacts. 
Either borrow a friend's cat for a short time or do some cat-sitting and see
how it goes.  What I have learned from my experiences is that my cats are
fairly friendly to intruders so I'm not too fearful should I ever decide to
increase my current cat population. 
      
Pam
1369.8Some Adjust Slowly to a PalLYMPH::SWANTCan't get away from basicsMon May 16 1988 14:2534
    Hmmm, I understand that some cats never adjust to a friend.  I
    have had both good and bad experiences with introducing a new
    cat.  When I brought Othliki (10-month, seal point Siamese female)
    into the house in a little carry case, I set her down and called
    P. Willow (14-month, blue point Siamese male).  He came running
    and I said she was just for him.  I open the cage and he
    immediately made friends and licked her.  They were best buddies
    ever after.  She had one litter by him later. 

    Now the bad news.  My current Tasha (male, lilac point Siamese
    male, neutered) was a second cat in the household.  He was tiny
    but terrorized my older big male (neutered) for nine months.
    Fortunately they did eventually become very good buddies. Several
    years later I brought in a white full male stray into the house.
    Two months later Tasha crept up on him and bit him in the thick
    part of the tail -- a bit that went clear through.  I was holding
    Sammy (the new cat) at the time and Tasha was incredibly sneaky
    about it.  This story has a sad ending, Sammy only lived three 
    months due to various medical problems.  Tasha never accepted him.

    Last summer when Tasha was 13 years old, his long time (now)
    buddy Clancy died.  I brought home a 4-month old female, Lily.
    Tasha was NOT aggressive this time.  But he retired to the
    basement for two months and refused to come up except to eat and
    then only when she was not present.  It has taken him nine months
    to adjust to her, while she apparently has been in love with him
    from the beginning.  She just never gave up.  She chased him,
    licked him, curled up next to him and finally won him over in the
    end.  He is now back to sleeping with me and following me about
    the house when he is not with Lily.

    I have read that same color opposite sex cats will adjust faster.
    
			Julie
1369.9Mine were easy !!FDCV03::FRANCISCOTue May 17 1988 09:219
    When I adopted W, Space was about 4 years old and neutered.  Although
    he wasn't particularly thrilled about W at first, it only took about
    a week for them to get along well. Space had been an only kitty
    for most of those 4 years and W was adopted as a kitten.
    
    When Space was put to sleep I got a new kitten to keep W company,
    and even though he had been an only kitty for 4+ months, it only
    took about a week for them to get along as well.  (She loved W from
    the start).
1369.10Strange reactions....HPSCAD::KNEWTONThis Space For RentThu May 19 1988 13:4340
    I just thought I'd write this reply to find out if any of your cats
    have done the same thing my Snuggles did when he met my mother's
    cat.
    
    Snuggles and my mother's cat, Muffin, met when me, my husband and
    Snuggles had to stay with my parents for a few days.  Well, I brought
    Snuggles over in his pet carrier box.  I set the box down in front
    of Muffin (with Snuggles still in it) and Snuggles hissed.  Muffin
    just sniffed around and walked away (went under the bed).  That seemed
    normal.  Then I took Snuggles out of the box and let him look around
    He went over to the bed and started sniffing around.  Then Muffin
    started hissing, but Snuggles didn't.  Well, they didn't look as
    though they were going to get into a big brawl so I left them alone
    for a while.  When I went to check on them later,  they had gone
    upstairs and Muffin was sitting on the stairs blocking Snuggles
    from going down.  I took care of that and I noticed that Snuggles
    kept chasing Muffin around and Muffin would be the one hissing and
    growling.  I also found a piece of nail from a claw near Snuggles
    eye (I assume he got to close).   Well, we kept them separate at
    night.  But during the day Snuggles would keep trying to get close
    to Muffin and Muffin would hiss and growl like you wouldn't believe,
    but Snuggles would only meow.  It got to a point that Snuggles got
    the courage to go up close to Muffin and the funny thing is is that
    Snuggles looked like he was going after a toy.  He'd kind of hop
    with one paw up like he was going to paw Muffin and he didn't growl
    or hiss, all he did was let out little meows.  Well, Muffin did not
    like that at all and he was ready to attack.  He lashed out a Snuggles
    and at that point my mother picked up Muffin and we kept them separate
    for the rest of the day.
    
    Was Snuggles acting normally?  I got the feeling that he really
    didn't know that that was another cat.  
    
    Another funny thing was, when I put Snuggles bed down in front of
    Muffin, at first Muffin hissed.  Muffin then started rubbing her
    chin (putting her sent on the bed) on the out side of the bed.
    
    Weird.  Did any of your kitties act like this?
    
    Kathy