Conference back40::soapbox

    
    I bought a pint of ripe strawberries for 99 cents.
    
    I thought it was a good buy.
    

    good bye.

    I bought a 750 ml. bottle of Blue Nun for $1.99.
    
    I thought it was a good buy.
    

    
    After you finished the bottle, did you send it Eveready ?
    
    By the way, Jack, I left a message for my customer at Eveready
    detailing why I was calling.  He didn't call back.
    
    So I believe that battery mystery will remain so.
    
    

          CCCCCCCC         RRRRRRRRR      AAAAAAAAAA         PPPPPPPP
         CC      CC       RR       RR    AA        AA       PP      PP
        CC        C      RR        RR    AA        AA      PP        PP
        CC               RR        RR    AA        AA      PP        PP
        CC               RR        RR    AA        AA      PP        PP
        CC               RRRRRRRRRRR     AAAAAAAAAAAA      PPPPPPPPPPP
        CC               RRRRR           AA        AA      PP   
        CC               RR  RR          AA        AA      PP
        CC               RR   RR         AA        AA      PP
        CC        C      RR    RR        AA        AA      PP
         CC      CC      RR     RR       AA        AA      PP
          CCCCCCCC       RR      RR      AA        AA      PP

    >I bought a 750 ml. bottle of Blue Nun for $1.99.
    
    >I thought it was a good buy.
    
     Depends on what you plan to use it for. :-)

Depends has multiple uses?

#1 and  #2.

    I sense the ghost of TOPDOC::AHERN appearing yet again!!!

    Michele bought 15 large cans of Campbells Chunky soup the other day at
    Walmart.  10 cents a piece.  Clam Chowder and Corn Chowder!

    12 years ago today I bought my first car, a 1984 Mustang GT with
    t-tops. The final price was $14,300. I remember shaking with excitement
    as I drove it out of Campbell Ford's lot. I still have it, after
    200,500 km, mostly city, and a lot of personal coaxing.

    It was a good buy.

    
    please translate 200,500km into miles...i'd like to see how many more
    miles i have left on my 'stang.  and i still hate you for having a gt
    with t-tops... :>
    

    ah, Corn Chowder. This reminds me of A Story.
    
    
    Seems an architect got a good deal on a piece of land on
    a hill overlooking Lummi Bay in Bellingham, Wa. on the coast.
    
    He built a nice house on the lot, and engaged a realtor (a friend of
    mine) to sell the house for him.
    
    My friend brought his first clients to the house, who looked at the
    place and thought it was nice, and the view was spectacular. Except for
    the sewage treatment plant at the base of the hill. Never at a loss for
    words my friend quipped "Yeah, it's nice to have that treatment plant
    down there... you can always tell when Safeway's having a special on
    corn!"
    
    He lost the sale.
    
    I thought it was worth it to lose the sale for that classic.

    >12 years ago today I bought my first car, a 1984 Mustang GT with
    >t-tops. The final price was $14,300. I remember shaking with excitement
    >as I drove it out of Campbell Ford's lot. I still have it, after
    >200,500 km, mostly city, and a lot of personal coaxing.
    
     My first new car was a Mustang GT. 1985. Fun car. Put 75K on it in 3
    years (it was stored the 1st winter, besides.) Nothing like
    downshifting into 3rd at 80 MPH to make people go bye-bye.

    
    /%^<   i need a real mustang....
    
    
    

>    please translate 200,500km into miles...

About 124,310 miles.

/john

    the 84 to 86 years are still in hot demand. Because they were so light,
    they're the perfect cars to hock up.

    What I liked about my car when I bought it (it was a good buy) was that
    nobody new what it was. I would have the odd passenger say "Gee, this
    is a nice car, what do you have in there a 4 cylinder?" At this point I
    would shift from 4th to second, burn rubber, squawk 3rd then 4th, the
    passenger with seat belt firmly locked with a look of shock would then
    say "That's not a four cylinder!"

    God I had fun.

    Yep. One of my favorite memories was of the look of horror this guy had
    when I burned him.  We're at a light. He's in a Chevy Nova, 350 engine,
    big hood scoop, etc. Light turns green. His car made a lot more noise,
    but I was quicker off the line, and turned to watch him as the
    secondaries opened up in 2nd. You should have seen his face. :-) The
    "this can't be happening!" face. Of course, I got blown off a few
    times, myself. Never by a chevy, mind you, but a lotus got me once. It
    had a higher top end.
    
     Damn, I miss that car.

    I used to have regular fun beating everything up to and including 427
    'Vettes across intersections in my hotted-up '68 Beetle.  After the
    first 75 feet, it was rather a different matter...

    
    Funny you should mention that Dick.
    I had a 1970 beetle that I installed a Porche engine in.
    I surprised a LOT of muscle cars.

    I used to own a '72 Nova with a 307 that was mildly hopped up.  Didn't
    really surprise anyone, but it made a lot of noise (headers into glass
    packs).  8^)

    <--- and as an aside...
    
    NEVER trust a salesman who tells you "these headers will slip right in,
    no problem" (took all weekend to get the suckers in, and only then
    after taking most of the engine compartment apart).

-1 tell me about it! i did my '66 Mustang and my '71 Road Runner (440 Wedge).

   talk about a weekend job, skinned knuckles, and a about a case of beer.

    People??......aren't you the least bit flabberghasted that I got all
    that Chunky Soup for 10 cents a piece???
    
    Get off this car kick would you??  You're all the age of Driving a
    Ceravan now...similar to when our parents drove their Impalas.  Deal
    with it!

    Remember the adage, you get what you pay for, Jack?  I knew you would.  

    > People??......aren't you the least bit flabberghasted that I got
    all...
    
    >   Get off this car kick would you??
    
    yeah! nobody even got grossed out on a GREAT Story!
    
    

       .24   Was it really CHUNKY SOUP? Or was it chunks.....of someones
    used soup.

    I got a Woodmen's Club velcro attached wrist watch with secret
    mirror compartment and a swivel out magnifying glass at KMART
    last September for $1.25 marked down from $12.95.  I had the
    clerk check the package price to make sure I wasn't embarassed
    at the cash register.
    
    I felt like a hunter returning home with the kill.
    
    They made great party favors for my 9 year old's birthday
    party.  The rest went in the Toys for Tots bin.

     Z   I got a Woodmen's Club velcro attached wrist watch with secret
     Z   mirror compartment and a swivel out magnifying glass at KMART
     Z   last September for $1.25 marked down from $12.95.
      
    Great, now you can become a secret agent in the Johnny Wonder Institute
    for Spying.  We're all real happy for you.
    
    Back to the soup.  Yeah, I've been feeling a little sour in the stomach
    lately.  What do you think it could be??  Where do they process this
    soup anyways?  New Jersey perhaps? 

    Probably that sewage treatment plant in WA.

    .24
    
    > Chunky Soup for 10 cents a piece
    
    Canned "Chunky Soup" blows chunks.
    

    What if it's in jars?

    > What if it's in jars?
    
    Then it blows jars.
    
    

    
    	Was at Rich's last night because I needed a roll of masking tape,
    	so I detoured through the sproting goods section to take a look
    	at baseball/softball gloves ... and they were on sal for 25% off
    	regular price.  So I got a $45 Spalding for $34.
    

    Soup Peoples....SOUP!
    
    
    Alright I'll shut up already!

    you should have checked to see if they had a spell checker on sale
    while you were there... :>
    
    and does corn and clam chowder really qualify as 'soup'???
    
    re: the kms translated into miles (124,310)
    
    i'm in trouble then...i have already passed that mark, and my cars a
    bit younger than his.  it's time to put her to rest, yes it is... %^<
    
    tho it's not my good buy, my cubeneigbor told me she bought a pair of
    ladies lined linen pants at pier 1 imports last week.  after all the
    markdowns, it was hers, for a mere 4.48...that's a good buy!
    
    glenn, next time you are in town, can i please have a ride in your
    'stang????

    that's very sproting of you, Jack.

    
    A few years ago, I bought a hummel for a dollar.  It is valued at
    $350.00.
    
    

    Were you figurine on making a profit?

    see, you can be funny.

    well... sometimes the Bumblee bee tuna thing does make me smile 8*)

    
    	Hey!  My first car was a mustang, too.  Unfortunately, it
    	was just a 1985 Mustang LX.  I would have liked a GT, but
    	I was just one week out of college when I got it.
    
    

   Pears - 49� each!     A real good buy ;-)
kb

    Jack, have you checked the freshness date on your cans of soup yet? 
    My guess is that you better eat them up quick.  And if you find any
    bloated cans, I recommend that you don't bother opening it.

    >   And if you find any  bloated cans, I recommend that you don't
    >   bother opening it.
    
    
    a)  if left long enough, the cans will open themselves.
    
    b)  re: bloated cans. anybody looked in the mirror lately?

    you mean a rear view mirror?

My second car was a 1967 Mustang FTA Fastback with a modified 390 engine
and a C6 automatic transmission set up for drag racing.  It only got about
7 miles per gallon and needed fuel that bordered on aviation gas, but it
sure was fun.  It was also a good buy at $900.

-Pete

[Posted by WWW Notes gateway]

    
    
    	RE:  raq
    
    	Pier 1 sells clothes?!  It's been ages since I've been into
    	one, but I thought they only sold household/furniture type
    	stuff.....
    

    >     Pier 1 sells clothes?!... I thought they only household/furniture 
    >     type stuff...
    
    ainchoo tried on a lampshade lately?

     Z   Jack, have you checked the freshness date on your cans of soup yet? 
     Z   My guess is that you better eat them up quick.  And if you find any
     Z   bloated cans, 
    
    You're not valuing the bloated cans difference!  You Canaanite!
    
    Actually the expiration is 1997!  I'm all set!

    .34
    
    You got rooked.  Shoulda been $33.75.

    Canned goods will last an indefinite amount of time if the container is
    not compromised in some way.  

    >  Canned goods will last an indefinite amount of time if the container
    >  is not compromised in some way.
    
    
    yes, a compromised container can be truly a thing to behold...

>>   [Posted by WWW Notes gateway]
    
    Pete,  how'd you do that?  Does this mean that I could still have
    access to Soapbox even after I left DEC?
    
    Jus wonder'n...

    

Sorta like Band-Aids: "sterility guaranteed while wrapper is sealed."
How are you supposed to put one on?

    > How are you supposed to put one on?
    
    unroll it.

    
    	RE: .55
    
    	No, the Digital firewall denies access to non-employees.
    
    
    	RE: .52
    
    	Yes, thank you, Binder, I knew that ... I rounded up.  At
    	a list price of $44.99 the sale price was actually $33.7425,
    	but I wasn't able to make exact change so the cashier grac-
    	iously rounded the price down for me.
    

    .56
    
    You magic them out of the wrapper.
    
    Sleight Dressings
    
    
    Colin
    

  .59  and then apply them firmly.


    tight pressings

    diane

    
    	[Looking for a way to turn this into a pun smut-fest]
    

    
    
    	re: .50
    
    	Not in the past few years, no.  =)
    

    >  [Looking for a way to turn this into a pun smut-fest]
    
    sanitary napkin.
    
    take it from there....

    
    	Well, I was sort of hoping to tie it into "tight pressings"
    	somehow.
    

    Proctors really on the bleeding edge with his comments lately!

    Ahhhhh.....well I tried!

       the "Tour of Italy" dinner at the Olive Garden.
    
        Yum !!!!!!!!!!!!
    
    Jack_whoz_fighten_to_keep_a_34_inch_waste
    

    SnArF!

    .51
    
    Well, that means they have only been sitting around for 4 years or
    so...  Happy eating!

    If there are any left, I may be able to pick up a 17" Digital monitor
    for $375-85.  As long as my Quantex system hasn't shipped yet, I can
    delete the monitor, bringing the system price down by about $300. 
    For an extra $85 or so, I can have a 17" flatscreen monitor instead of
    a 15" monitor.  
    
    This would be a good buy, should I luck into it.

    
    you will love your new system
    
    It was a good buy

    .71
    
    After a guy in my group ordered his, the second day the blowout was
    announced, there were ten left.  Good lu-u-uck...

    
    	TI-85 Graphing Calculator for $105 (w/tax) at Walmart. The
    Quinsigamond college book store wanted $180+. Whatta bargain...:)
    
    
    jim

    I got it!  I got it!  There were only 6 shipping here and 4 were gone
    already.  I lucked out! 
    
    Now, I will not have to squint into a teeny-tiny 15" monitor, but will
    be able to gaze upon much larger graphics with my 17" monitor.  Called 
    Quantex, they will credit me $290 for the monitor and $20 for shipping, 
    which means the difference will be about $70-80 between a 15" and a 17" 
    monitor.  
    
    Duke Nukem will be near life-like now.  8^)
    
    Now I'm thinking I should have upgraded to the Diamond Stealth video card
    with 2 meg VRAM.  Oh well, I'm at my limit of spending as it is.  8^)
    
    
    -steve                                    

    this weekend, i bought an 18" gold herringbone necklace which has a
    design on one side and is plain on the other for 19.95.  supposedly
    retails for over 50$.  i thought that was a pretty good deal.  plus,
    while i was there, i also bought a floating heart charm for 80cents. 
    it was on sale then on clearance.  AND i got a golfing mickey mouse tie
    tac for 7dollars and change.  i made out pretty well at the jewelry
    store.  even bought myself something.  blue topaz earrrings that are
    similar to both my tennis bracelet and my ring.  i got them on sale,
    too.
    
    

    
    ...blue topaz earrings?  where, where?
    

re .77 does that belong in the "Things that sound obscene" topic?

Sorry, but as far as I know, the web interface to notes only works
from inside the firewall.  Check out the internal dec home page at
http://www.crl.dec.com/Digital/home.html for access to the web 
interface to notes.  It's a little cumbersome, but it gets the job
done.

--Pete

[Posted by WWW Notes gateway]

    > Now I'm thinking I should have upgraded to the Diamond Stealth video
    > card  with 2 meg VRAM.
    
    I turned in my old PCI viper card on  the Diamond amnesty program (cos
    Viper don't work real good w/ Win95).
    
    I did it.  Do it.
    
    for the $$$; in my case the vid. performance went off the scale.
    
    now if I can just get the cyber demon on level 30 to leave me alone, I
    can win this idiot doomster obsession!

    <--- alas, it's too late.  My puter ships today (supposedly).

South African Farming Estate
 
Dear Sirs
 
James Macgregor is retiring shortly and therefore
for the first time in 72 years this magnificent
South African farming estate is for sale:
 
Located in the beautiful Eastern Transvaal lowveld
30 mins drive from the internationally famous
Kruger National Park.
 
A mere ten minutes drive from White River (the closest town)
and fifteen minutes to the Country Club which boasts a
championship 18 hole Golf Course.
 
 
Name: - Lochaber Estates
        Heidelberg Valley
        White River
        Mphumalanga
        South Africa
 
Contact: James Macgregor
         Telephone: +27 13 751-2711
         Fax:       +27 13 751-2711 (request fax line)
         Postal Address: PO Box 186
                         White River
                         1240
                         Mphumalanga
                         South Africa
 
Size: - 520 Hectares
 
History: - Purchased in 1922 by Col. Norman Eaton Macgregor.
           Developed into a flourishing citrus and citrus nursery estate.
           Currently owned and managed by James Mohr Macgregor.
 
           The primary crop currently produced is tobacco.
           Secondary crops include maize, dried sugar beans and
           13,000 macadamia trees under micro-irrigation.
 
           100 hectares of timber (saligna).
 
           A herd of 120 head of cattle is also ranched on the estate.
 
Irrigation: - Irrigation water supplied by canal system from
              Witklip Dam; capacity 13.2 million Cubic Metres
 
              - 200 hectares scheduled
              - 9 irrigation electric pumping stations
              - underground piping on 150 hectares
              - 2 boreholes for main houses
 
Buildings: - 19 bulk curing tobacco barns
              2 large storage and sorting sheds
              1 roller mill for maize meal
             40 simplex units for farm labourers
              1 fully equipped farm workshop
              8 storerooms     
 
             Schools: - 1 pre-school (cr�che)
                          25 children
                        1 primary school
                          (100 Children)
 
Housing: - Main Homestead (500 square metres)
           - magnificent colonial style family home set
             in breathtaking scenic surroundings.
           - 6 bedrooms
           - 3 bathrooms   
           - fully fitted kitchen and pantry
           - 2 Lounges
           - 2 Dining rooms
           - large covered patio surrounding front
             area of the home
           - fully equipped laundry block
           - swimming pool & pool house
           - tennis court
           - covered garages for 7 vehicles
           - home/woodworking workshop
 
           Large Managers Home
           - swimming pool
           - large garden
           - 3 bedrooms
           - separate self contained cottage
 
           Forman's cottage
           - 2 bedrooms
           - bathroom
           - lounge
           - dining room/kitchen    
 
           Office
           - fully equipped with strongroom and safe etc.
           - telephone, fax and computer facilities
 
Vehicles: - 9 tractors
            2 LDV's
            2 VW Golf cars
            1 3.5 ton truck
            3 motorcycles
 
Equipment: - 7 trailers
           - 2 ploughs
           - 3 discs
           - 1 planter
           - 2 threshers
           - 2 generators
 
Asking Price: US$1.6 million (negotiable)
 
For further information contact:
James or Joan Macgregor
Telephone: +27 13 751-2711
Fax:       +27 13 751-2711 (request fax line)
Postal Address: PO Box 186
                White River
                1240
                Mphumalanga
                South Africa

    That IS a good buy, eh?

    they forgot to mention the bugs, guerillas running thru the hills, and
    the chance to own your very own case of cholera for only $1.6mill!
    
    works for me.
    
    will they take a cheque?

    You would have room to build a temple in honour of Debra, eh?

    >  You would have room to build a temple in honour of Debra, eh?
    
    Ummm... what would I have to sacrifice to her honour? 
    
    Suppose I dress up like a 12 year male virgin? 'Spose she'd buy into
    the concept?

    Well, acting like yourself is the easy part, but I donno how you're
    gonna shave so many years off. :-)

    re .-1
    
    hmph. you'd think Deb would take pity on me... I'm a 12 year old
    trapped in an old f*rt's body!
    
    {sound of joints creaking}

    
    
    	Your joints creak? Mine just burn....;*)

    -1 |^)

        Liar liar, pants on fire!

    >    Liar liar, pants on fire!
    
     That's not his pants. That's a spliff. #^)

    
    
    	...rolled in a grocery bag....:*)

    that some sort of new style of dress or something?

    Good Buy:
    
    Those little firecrackers attached to two strings in which one ties the
    two strings to two stationary objects to be pulled apart activating a
    loud popping sound. An exellent buy at only $.75/box. Plus, buy one get
    one free!
    -ss

    did anyone hear about the firecracker manufacturing plant in China
    which exploded and killed, last count, was 36?

 I'm sure someone has, Ron..




 Jim

    Jim;
    
    this am on the drive-in, i heard part of the story but missed where in
    china the blast took place...we have missionary friends on the
    mainland, and although it's a big place, I wanna make sure they're ok!

 My church also supports missionaries on the mainland..I pray all are well.



 Jim

    Mini powderkeg snarf!