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Conference govt02::basingstoke

Title: * BASINGSTOKE - Gateway to Wessex *
Notice:BASINGSTOKE - John Arlott lived here - then left, I wonder why
Moderator:COMICS::CORNEJ
Created:Wed Jul 27 1988
Last Modified:Thu Jun 05 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:925
Total number of notes:5875

414.0. "Cars For Sale" by KERNEL::MORIARTY () Tue Mar 26 1991 14:45

    I have two cars for sale as follows:
    
    Nissan Bluebird 2.0 DLx
    G Reg (Late 89)
    & 
    
    Ford Escort 1.3 GL
    A Reg (Late 83)
    
    For further details call Kevin on
    
    7833 3851
    
    or Kernel::moriarty
       Kevin Moriarty @UVO
    	
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414.2And the next one please!!!KERNEL::MORIARTYTue Apr 02 1991 18:019
    & mine.....
    
    Ford Escort 1.3 GL
    A reg/1983
    63000 miles
    5 speed gearbox
    MOT til Nov/Dec 
    
    Call Kevin on 7833 3851
414.3MORRIS MINOR / 1962UBOHUB::KINGSTON_DCreating the illusionWed Apr 03 1991 12:4921
    
    I have a Morris Minor which I planned to renovate but now it is 
    getting in the way so it has to go.
    
    	The details are as follows :
    
    			Morris Minor Saloon
    			Pre 'A' Registration (1962)
    			Colour - Grey
    			Engine - 1098cc (new 4 years ago)
    			
    It has been stored under cover and up on wheel jacks so the bodywork
    and mechanics are in reasonable condition.
    
    One other point is that the number plate was valued at �900 about
    2 years ago, however I'm sure it's worth less than that now.
    
    PRICE : �400 (For Quick Sale)
    
    For more information contact Dave Kingston 7843-6354 (@UBO)
    
414.4would you buy a used car...?LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNice Computers Don't Go DownMon Apr 08 1991 14:393
    I see Kevin "Arfur Daley" Moriarty is back in business then...
    
    How's business after the bust then Kev..???
414.5Excuse me guv but is this your earth???KERNEL::MORIARTYMon Apr 15 1991 10:514
    Mr Hutchings,
    	So nice to hear from you again.....I'm very well apart from the
    beating I received during interrogation.
    	Have you planted any trees lately???
414.6wot no wallet..??LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNice Computers Don't Go DownMon Apr 15 1991 18:136
    Yep,
        I got the seedlings from under the wet carpet in that last motor
    you sold me...
    
    They match the ones I found growing out of the paper filler in the
    wing....
414.7How does your garden grow...with no earth??KERNEL::MORIARTYTue Apr 16 1991 11:482
    Oh you mean the carpet you took out of the car & put in your living
    room!!!!
414.8Export to ozPAPERS::WOODHere's another fine mess you've gotten me into !Tue Apr 16 1991 16:064
If you can get your car over to Australia, I'll buy it !

Rich
414.9Skippy,skippy,skippy the bush kangaroooooo....KERNEL::MORIARTYWed Apr 17 1991 11:045
    	I've got a contact in oz who could possibly help you out sir...
    He does a good line in sheep as well so you won't be lonely...
    
    Kevin :)
    
414.10What's in a namePAPERS::WOODHere's another fine mess you've gotten me into !Wed Apr 17 1991 16:295
With a name like Kevin, I'm surprised you haven't got an XR3i to get rid
of.

Bluey
414.11G'day mate.....KERNEL::MORIARTYWed Apr 17 1991 16:427
    No,I drive mini's & eat Rowntree's fruit gums.....you shandy drinking
    northern B'stard!!!!
    	By the way,do you know anyone who is selling any cricket
    equipment??
    
    
    
414.12who is this Rich Wood anyway?LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNice Computers Don't Go DownWed Apr 17 1991 17:528
    Try the Fat Beer Swiller Mcgaughrin...
    
    and Kevin, the box goes in the trousers...NOT on the nose...
    
    mind you..with your tiny widger you could get away with using a
    matchbox....:-) :-) :-) 
    
    
414.13Biffa Bacons a Northern Jessy:)))KERNEL::MORIARTYThu Apr 18 1991 10:166
    Why would I want to put a matchbox on me nose Rich??????
    
    Watch yourself up in Manchester over the weekend old chap they might
    recognise that phoney Yorkshire accent & do a Biffa Bacon on ya:))))
    
    
414.14Matchbox ? I've got a match.....PAPERS::WOODHere's another fine mess you've gotten me into !Thu Apr 18 1991 13:258
Kevin,

Obviously something you are doing is making you go blind, I didn't enter
.12, Mr. P. Hutchings (Mrs) did ! I suggest you desist from your under
desk activities and pocket billiards.

Richard
414.15go for the pink...LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNice Computers Don't Go DownThu Apr 18 1991 13:366
    Hear Hear Mr W.
    
    Get your act together Kev, you're about as useful as a chocolate teapot
    at the moment...
    
    :-) :-) :-)
414.16Biffa Bacons still a Northern Jessy!!KERNEL::MORIARTYThu Apr 18 1991 13:449
    Mr Wood,may I apologise for my blindness & I will indeed desist from
    my under desk activities & pocket billiards.....Mr Hutchings as far
    as knowing what the various bits of equipment are for cricket....let me
    just clarify that a beer can & a stick to beat the can with are not
    the only requirements for a match,as you may have thought....& I
    believe that you are the only man who had such a small rockpack that 
    no protection was needed at all!!!:))))
    
     
414.17read this...LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNice Computers Don't Go DownThu Apr 18 1991 15:5970
    Mr Daley_Moriarty,
              
    As chairperson of the Digital Cricketers (and I use the term Cricketers
    loosely here) Supporters Club, I feel that I am qualified to comment on
    what and what does not constitute what is required for a game of
    cricket.
    
    As I see it, to play the game of Cricket, one requires the following:
    
    A Bat
    A Ball
    Some Stumps (also known as the "bits of wood..for non-cricketing types)
    Some Bails (different from Balls..these are round and red..Bails are
                long and thin with knobbly bits on)
    Oh, and also some players.
    
    The following may contain some technical terms which Mr Moriarty may
    find difficult to follow, in each case an explanation will be inserted
    in parenthesis (brackets):
    
    One puts on ones "whites" : (white shirt, white trousers, white socks,
    white cacks, white jumper..this can have rather attractive trim round
    the collar and cuffs....and white shoes)
    
    One then puts on one Pads (Large lumps of leather that protect ones
                               shins from damage by a mad bowler (one who
                               chucks the ball).
    One then puts on ones gloves (No apparent reason for wearing these..apart 
                                  from the fact that it makes the Batsman (one 
                                  who hits the ball with a large lump of wood) 
                                  look like he has bunches of bananas for 
                                  hands.)
    
    One then takes ones Bat (A large lump of wood)
    
    One then walks out to the wicket (playing area) to polite applause
    
    One then defends ones stumps against a mad bowler throwing the ball (a 
    round leather object) at humungeous speeds and attempts to hit the ball as 
    far as possible.
    
    One then "is out" (his bails have been knocked off by the mad bowler)
    
    One then returns from the wicket to polite applause and murmurs of
    "well played sir" and "what a plonker" and also sometimes sounds of
    raucous laughter from ill bred supporters.
    
    One then watches other members of the team score large amounts of runs
    (when one runs from one set of stumps to the other) and feels totally
    inadequate.
    
    One then goes to the pub and has vast amounts of falling down water.
    
    And this is the fabulous game of cricket.
    
    P.S. 
        some terms frequently used by supporters (people who are nothing at
    all to do with the game but turn up uninvited and embarrass the captain
    of the team by their outrageous behaviour)
    
     "come on you whites"
     "sack the fielder"
     "what a plonker"
     "my granny could have hit that..ya prat"
     "you ought to use the bat the other way up next time"
     "Jesus mate..if you was bowling inside a barn...you'd miss the
      side..!!)
    
     I thenk yew.
                                     
414.18Hutchings opened his legs & showed his class!!KERNEL::MORIARTYThu Apr 18 1991 18:1515
    Mr Hutchings,I assume you learnt all these terms in the close season
    
    since as I remember (& you quite rightly mentioned) that the limit of
    
    your cricketing knowledge constituted supporting both teams - "Come
    
    on yeeew whhiittes" & playing caribbean music on one of the many
    
    discarded lager cans laying around your feet....I congratulate you
    
    on learning your lines so well & it must have been to impress the
    
    girlies in your office!!!!
    
    Mr man
414.19Bargain for saleKERNEL::MORIARTYWed May 08 1991 15:399
    	Mazda 626 LX
    
    	'D' Reg....Good condition....available at end of the month for
    
    quick sale......Offers in region of 2500 pounds....a real bargain.
    
    Call 7833 3851 for more details
    
    kevin
414.20would you buy a used car...LARVAE::HUTCHINGS_PNo Risc..No FunThu May 09 1991 14:5618
    He's at it again..!!!!!!!!
    
    Since this topic was started, Kevin "wanna buy a motor John" Moriarty
    has had for sale:
    
    Nissan Bluebird 2.0 DLx  G reg
    Ford Escort     1.3 GL   A reg
    Ford Escort     1.3 GL   A reg
    Mazda 626           LX   D reg
    
    Kevin, are you by any chance starting a used car business..???
    Does your manager know...??
    Does the Taxman know..??
    
    Tell all....
                .
                 .and none of that "first the earth cooled...etc etc.."
    
414.21What about 'er indoors??KERNEL::MORIARTYThu May 09 1991 15:0611
    Yes,well,before offering them to you - Mr "Arfur Daley" Hutchings I
    
    would obviously like to give the genuine buyer a chance to buy some
    
    good vehicles....incidentally what did you do with those 3 cars you
    
    had for sale - all apparently genuinely owned by little old ladies??
    
    & with only 10 miles on the clock!!!
    
    Terry
414.22Ford Escort BravoHAMPS::NICHOLLSAll of the aboveMon Jun 24 1991 10:3225


                      FORD ESCORT 1.6 BRAVO

                             5 DOOR
 
                           IMMACULATE 

                        1987 LOW MILEAGE

                           1 YEARS TAX
                         WARRANTY & MOT

                         RELUCTANT SALE

                           �4,800 ONO

                         ALEX 7775-3036
                        (O256) 25818 EVES





414.23VW Polo with low mileageHAMPS::THAYER_SmeowWed Jul 10 1991 09:0714
     
                              VW Polo Coupe CX
    
         1984 B Reg, only 26,000 miles, one owner.  12 months tax and MOT.  
         
         Red exterior, black and white interior trim, factory fitted 
         sunroof, radio cassette.
         
                              Excellent condition
         
                                 �2,600 o.n.o.
         
                    Telephone:  Susi Thayer  (0256) 474891
         
414.24STREET CRED..WHO CARES?COMICS::PEWTERTue Aug 06 1991 18:3111
    
    
    MAESTRO 1.6 HLS
    
    B reg, 5 gears, 11 months MOT, 5 months tax, 47,000 genuine miles
    on clock, alarm, metallic blue paintwork. Good condition and good
    runner. Surprisingly roomy hatchback, great family car.
    
    1500 ono.  call Karen on 7833 3770
    
    
414.25Fiesta For SaleHAMPS::NICHOLLSGis a Job!Thu Aug 15 1991 11:299
                            Fiesta Finesse 1.1
                           Very good condition
                               40,000 miles
                                  Y Reg
                                 Sunroof
                             Economy Control
                               MOT & Taxed
                                #1350 ono
                            Basingstoke 463783
414.2655 to the GallonHAMPS::HAWKINS_BThu Sep 19 1991 14:0519
    Anyone want to buy a second car?
    
    Fiat 126 BIS (Hatchback) for Sale
    
    G Reg (Feb 1990)
    
    Under 12,000 miles
    
    Under Warranty until 1993
    
    Ideal Second Car
    
    Radio/Casette Player
    
    55 miles per gallon
    
    (Have just bought 1953 Morris Minor so Fiat must go)
    
    Call Brenda 7768 5718