Conference 7.286::digital

    Are you sure you don't work for DEC-France? Sounds like a similiar 
    whining to what we heard from them. There complaint though, if I
    remember, was something about the Moet Chandon not being properly
    chilled in the restaraunt cafe. I think they had a strike over it too! 
    
    My advice: "pack a lunch". That's we do in the states. Or better yet 
    - see if tobin delivers!!!        

    here in ZKO cafeteria they don't have large spoons for soup.

    you go buy the soup, then go to pick a soup spoon to drink it with but
    all the spoons are small (the one you use to stir the coffee with).

    i have no idea how they expect us to drink our soup with these small
    spoons. talk about waste of time. 

    sometimes they have soup spoons, but many more times they don't.

    if you ask me i think the cafeteria situation in all of DEC facilities
    is in a big miss.

    \nasser

    Remember Woody Allen joke about life ?"the food is terrible and the
    helpings are so small".

    If you are hungry, go and get a banana and tell the others to wait.
    You do take a break to go to WC, don't you .-)

    G'day All,

    Re the last note "You do take a break to go to WC, don't you .-)".

    Ha I am a company man wouldn't I waste time doing that !!!! At best I
    leave a puddle at my desk every day :-).

    The best company I worked for was British Telecom in England, they
    actually gave us very good restaurant facilities.  Hardly anyone went
    out for lunch most people had their meals at the restaurant the food
    was good and we definitely got more then 3 chips, 2 ... etc.  Some
    people even came in early for breakfast because it was well cooked. 
    Before anyone says that British Telecom is a government owned business
    it isn't.  Would it not be more productive to give better restaurant
    facilities, rather then wasting peoples time and money.  So far I have
    come across only two companies that have bad restaurant facilities and
    Digital is one of them.

    I better go as I am still suffering from malnutrition and am fast
    running out of energy, my typing is slowing down.
    
    Regards from a very hungry man,
    
    Sunil

    You guys actually GET A LUNCH BREAK???

"Restaurant facilities"???  Here in New York City we either have to spend $7-8
to get a decent lunch, or brown bag it.  Gimme a break.

    Here in Ferney we don't have a cafeteria, and even if we did it would
    be closed down with the rest of the building, as planned. The cheapest
    lunch you can get anywhere round here leaves you no change from $10.
    Not that we complain about it. We're happy to be employed.
    
    Piers

    We in Dallas consider it a sign of weakness and lack of dedication to
    the company to eat lunch...so we all just go over to Hooter's and
    drink it. :^]  
    						Tex

\nasser,
Why not use a straw? Better yet just stick youre face in the bowl and
have at. THat way youll fit right in. :^)

Id like to pass a suggestion about the cafe facilities by the readership:
Since the company is looking for ways of saving $$$ why not install some
number (depends on the plant population) of troughs in the dining area
(visitors would have separate 'facilities'). This cuts all dinnerware (plates
to forks), trays, serving lines, etc. Instead your group would have a certain
time interval scheduled to use the cafe. At your appointed time dinner would
get served by flowing it onto the trough. If you want dinnerware youd bring it
from home. An added benefit would be to boost morale and instill an attitude of
community, comradeship and discipline amoung the ranks since the whole group
would eat together. What do you think? ;^) Only problem I can see is that
the bathrooms aremnt big enough the handle the after lunch surge. :^)

    Goddard, although you've given us a brilliant solution you've missed an
    obvious opportunity for additional savings:
    
> Only problem I can see is that
> the bathrooms aremnt big enough the handle the after lunch surge. :^)
    
    The bathrooms are obviously not being used during the lunch process. 
    No sense in wasting space for cafeterias that aren't used during the
    bathroom process, now is there?  Combine the two (many bathrooms
    already HAVE troughs) and we're saving BIG bucks!
    
    							Tex

    Gee, I didn't know that Tobins had gone international and was 'serving'
    Australia now! 
    
    8-{

    do we have a cafeterias VP in DEC? if not may be we need get one to 
    this position to help sort all this mess out.

    \nasser

Tex,
Are you a bean counter? :^) If not then your talent is being wasted in your
current position.

Good point \nasser! I wonder if the IBM VP of cafes has been let go yet?

    
    
    We are back to if DIGITAL ran restaurant then
    
    

    
    How about sending few spoons to star::abassi with interoffice mail ?
    Lets solve the problem of ZK cafeteria soup consumption time.

    					P.Art Ofthesolution

                                
    please DECeeees ! dont send me soup spoons, i was merely pointing
    out that if the ZKO cafeteria had the normal size soup spoons instead
    of using tea spoon sized spoons to drink the soup with , then this could
    end up saving DECeeees time in drinking the soup resulting in $$$'s saved
    to DEC and possibly higher DEC stock prices as well.

    ps. iam still trying to figure who send me the pairs of socks the other day
    with no return address and what does it mean to send someone socks so 
    i don't need spoons as well filling up my mail slot !

    \bye and thanks again for the kind thought  .
    \nasser
    

    	...the little dog laughed to see such sport,
        and the dish ran away with the socks.

    Nasser, the ZKO cafeteria has LOTS of soup spoons.  Often they're
    the only spoons I can find.  They're usually in the end bins, but
    sometimes in the middle.
    
    Now forks are another problem; they keep running out.  Probably
    because half the facility is stocking a restaurant in their
    cubicles with them...
    
    
    We're blessed with an excellent cafeteria at ZKO.  It's really
    an anomaly in the world of corporate food.
    
    					Steve

================================================================================
Note 11.6209                  Things to Like Today                  6209 of 6557
DRDAN::KALIKOW "IDU/W3: So advanced, it's Simple!"   19 lines  22-MAR-1994 21:20
                          -< MSO2 ChowdahFest ROOLZ! >-
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
...
    I struck up a conv. with the head honcho of Tobin's who wuz there
    officiatin' all the various Chefs from the various Tobin Eatatoria
    there present.  
    
    	"So is it true that Tobin's started on a handshake between Ken 
    		and Mr. Tobin?"  
    "Yes."  
    	"And now how many different companies do you feed?" 
    "<A number I forgot, but large>."  
    	"Wow.  And what's Mr. Tobin doing these days?"  
    "Mr. Tobin is deceased."  
    
    	"Gee, sorry to hear that.  I trust it wasn't food poisoning?? :-)"
    
    Laffs all 'round, mostly coming from the Chefs...
    

    G'day All,
    
    From the replies it is quite obvious that you all seem to think that
    Digitals cafes are a bit of a joke.  As far as I am concerned they are
    a real rip off !!!
    
    Whatever happened to those nice theories that Mr. Hertzgoff (I think
    that's the mans name), put forward and American companies were at the
    fore front of implimenting them.  I think it was along the lines of if
    you provide better working conditions, food, etc you get more from your
    workers.
    
    Gee I only wanted a few more chips and veg. from the tight so and so's. 
    Just think I will be on call till mid-night and if a call comes in at
    11:55 as has happened should I ignore it because I am feeling hungry
    :-) !!!!
    
    What with the layoffs, and the bad moral Digital finds another way to
    cheer us up.  Perhaps it some new theory someone has put forward
    somewhere to make us more productive.
    
    Regards,
    
    Sunil

    Be glad you have someplace to go and get food or eat your brown bag at
    without having to be chained to your monitor all day.
    
    Sheesh, next thing they'll ask for is a bathroom.

    The Michael Douglas quote from  "Wall St." sums up this string nicely:
     
     'Lunch is for wimps!'
    
    Julian (In Italy where lunch rather than Wall St. is still taken
    seriously)
             

re .0

cor, you're lucky they even have heard of the word "vegetarian".

        .19

    >Nasser, the ZKO cafeteria has LOTS of soup spoons.  Often they're
    >the only spoons I can find.  They're usually in the end bins, but
    >    sometimes in the middle.

    if DEC thinks that by just by writing "soup spoons" on the side of the bin
    then that will make those spoons soup spoons, then DEC must think
    DECeees have never seen soup spoons befor comming to DEC or something.

    i've seen tea spoons bigger that those spoons DEC calls soup spoons.

    don't you think something is wrong here if soup spoons were this size?

    this is another case of "not invented here" syndrome that DEC suffers
    from, we always try to make our own standards instead of using
    the predominant standards.

    we in DEC might know one of two things about computers, but when it 
    comes to food cutlery iam afraid to say that we are clue'less.

    i was not born yesterday, i know a soup spoon when i see one, and i say
    that the ZKO soup spoons are *_NOT_* soup spoons.
    
    \bye
    \nasser

    Get a job in the field. Then you'll have a wide selection of places to
    eat. Just stop in at any drive-thru window and eat while you speed off
    to your next customer. (Suggestion, get used to eating at non-peak
    times. It saves you extra minutes to not have to wait in a long line at
    the drive-thru!)
    
    When you get those urgent calls from customers out in the boonies, you
    may have to go hungry for a while. There's usually NOTHING for miles in
    any direction. :-)
    
    Harry - The traveling repairman... ;-)
    

    
    Nasser,

    I'll put back the envelope in the mail anyway, can stand your
    suffering.

    				APAgen

    Food glorious food, hot sausage and mustard.
    
    Time for food.
    
    Ren�

        Re:                        <<< Note 2987.30 by LABC::RU >>>

        What a  great  thread.    Just  as  good as the If Digital Were a
        Restaurant one.
        
        Seriously, if you don't like the cafeteria, why do you eat there?
        Bring your own, take  a  walk - you Aussies are blessed with nice
        weather all the time.   When  I worked in Chatswood (at that time
        the subsidiary office) there was no  such  thing  as a cafeteria.
        For lkunch you grapped a coupld of colleagues, walked through the
        train station and had the pick of a zillion  food stores.  If the
        cafeteria  really is that bad, your location must be a  wonderful
        opportunity for  some  entrepreneur.    If there aren't any, find
        one!
        
        I work in  the  Mill these days.  For decent food I go for a walk
        down Main Street.   To  socialize  with my colleagues I go to the
        cafeteria and work on my diet!
        
        Anker

Re: .30

Oh but I have.

The ZKO cafeteria has a wide variety - duck, yes we've had that.  Also
frogs legs, roast suckling pig and many other unusual foods.  There is usually
at least one vegetarian meal.  I don't get the soup so I can't comment
on that.

				Steve

    RE: .26
    
    > if DEC thinks that by just by writing "soup spoons" on the side of the bin
    > then that will make those spoons soup spoons, then DEC must think
    > DECeees have never seen soup spoons befor comming to DEC or something.
    
    Well, DEC turned a proprietary operating system into an "open" one just
    by prefixing "Open" to the name.
    
    Maybe we should have:
    
        OpenSpoons for Soup AXP, an AlphaGeneration utensil
    
    :-)
    

    
        > For lunch you grabbed a couple of colleagues,
    
    Now that's a novel approach to downsizing....
    

r.e .0

Of course Sunil,

you could always join the extremely well equipped gymnasium complete with 
its own staff.

or sneak one of the pastries that educational services lay on each morning.

or go for a stroll by the river.

or just lounge around on the balcony enjoying the view.

or try the Cappucinos, pay a little extra for the salad bar...

or fill up on junk food, I hear the M&Ms from the food machine on the first 
floor are good. Your in Customer Support, start to look the part and get 
the requisite candy-induced-acne-wasted-look, its worth an extra level on 
your review.

or make or buy a sandwich on the way to work. 

One thing is for certain, the hell you have to suffer from malnutrition is 
buffered by the rest of the benefits.

I eat at the cafetaria "at the Collosus of Rhodes", sometimes even have the 
lentil burger, when I am visiting Sydney. To be honest Sunil, anyone who 
complains about the Rhodes cafe should try a few weeks in a field office.
This is just another example of head office insularity.

Just an observation from the field.

    Re -.1

    Who paid you to write that note ?  

>I eat at the cafetaria "at the Collosus of Rhodes", sometimes even have the 
>lentil burger, when I am visiting Sydney. To be honest Sunil, anyone who 
>complains about the Rhodes cafe should try a few weeks in a field office.
>This is just another example of head office insularity.

    But I have a number of times when I have gone on-site, you certainly
    get more then what we get here for less.  I guess I should be grateful
    I get the diarrhoea for free :-).
    
    Regards,
    
    Sunil

    i always wondered about DECeeees who bring their lunch in brown bag to
    work.

    i realy dont think that normal DECeeees would do that. 
    
    i mean why would a DECeeee get up early in the morning to prepare food 
    that will be consumed few hours later and then put it in a brown bag and 
    carry it out in the cold and in the car all the way with them to work 
    and then put it under the disk till lunch time , while in the mean time 
    they could just have walked few feet over and bought fresh made 
    food and soup at lunch time from the DEC cafeterias or any of the
    surrounding food establishments? this is what lunch hour is for, so
    that DECeeees get to leave their cube and get out get some fresh air and
    mingle with their fellow DECeeees and exchange rumor talk and get
    to know each other more at the professional and personal level.

    i think DECeeees who come to work in the morning carrying their lunch 
    in brown bags need to take a second look at their life and priorities
    in general.

    hope this helps.
    
    \nasser

>    i always wondered about DECeeees who bring their lunch in brown bag to
>    work.

Actually, its a plastic lunchbox, complete with apple and other goodies.
Saves $25 a week which I use to go to real restaurants out of work hours, 
where the ambiance is somewhat more solubrious than found in hospitals, 
prisons and company eateries.

>    i realy dont think that normal DECeeees would do that. 

Viva la difference NASser.
    
>    i mean why would a DECeeee get up early in the morning to prepare food 
>    that will be consumed few hours later and then put it in a brown bag  
>     and 
>    carry it out in the cold and in the car all the way with them to work 

the words "Sydney" and "cold" are rarely used in close proximity. Yes, 
"Maynard" and "cold" may prompt different behaviour. Certainly not the same 
way that "head office", "plush" and "boondoggles" seem to form three of a 
perfect kind.

>    and then put it under the disk till lunch time , while in the mean 

I am waiting for the Alpha LEAN laptop machine, the CPU will keep soup warm 
without a microwave. As for under the disk, are we talking L2, L3, other 
vertebral incarnations or those of the rotating spindle variety?

>time 
>    they could just have walked few feet over and bought fresh made 
>    food and soup at lunch time from the DEC cafeterias or any of the
>    surrounding food establishments? this is what lunch hour is for, so
>    that DECeeees get to leave their cube and get out get some fresh air 

fresh air nasser? I thought they had mandatory testing for that sort of 
stuff in VMS engineering.

>and
>    mingle with their fellow DECeeees and exchange rumor talk and get
>    to know each other more at the professional and personal level.

My office has 50 people, you must have long lunches to get to know everyone 
at your place. Sunil has considerably more people to lunch with but most 
wont eat with him because all he does is complain about the food.

>
>    in brown bags need to take a second look at their life and priorities
>    in general.

I have, and work, well, its dropped somewhat of late, particularly when I 
worked out that "pay for performance" has yet to earn me the kind of pay 
increase that would let me eat in the company cafetaria every day!

>    hope this helps.

only marginally.

>    
>    \nasser

BTW.
The soup ladle is on its way, has anyone go a bucket they can donate?
John

    G'day All,                                                  

    This food wars has definitely got out of hand, today I had an encounter
    with a rather irate person because I had "Internationalised" this
    problem.  I have tried for a year to solve this problem and have got
    nowhere.  Basically the facilities manager *HAD DONE HIS BEST*, but the
    restaurant had kept to the rules.  I had talked to the restaurant manager
    begged, pleaded and humoured her to no avail !!!

    This week I got desperate as I was feeling very hungry and seeing 8
    chips, 3 broccoli, two beetroots and half a portion of the main meal 
    made me annoyed.  I have been feeling very hungry and I mean very
    hungry seeing the serving and the smile on the restaurant managers face
    just made me boil over.  I had done what I could for a year enough is
    enough.  
    
    I hate it when someone tells me that I was wrong to drawer attention to 
    this problem in this conference and shouts at me.  That's not the way 
    things should be done !!!  I was told that I was wasting company time, 
    hang on their if I go out for meals I would be wasting more time.  What 
    about the half hour that digital gained by me not going out ?  Not to
    mention that I wrote the note in my own time !!! Not to mention the
    times that I have come into work after hours and not claimed the
    allowance if it was for an hour or so.  I did this because I want to
    service my customers calls the best I can, I want Digital to be a
    success and I want to contribute.
    
    Just for Australian employees interest, the restaurant always gives you
    a smaller portion.  Because in the past they found the full portions
    were being wasted, fair enough no one wants to waste food.  *BUT* it
    was also understood by this catering company that if a customer asked
    for more they were to be given more.  I did no more then ask and was
    given the cold shoulder.
    
    Now I find not only is this matter "Internationalised" but it's
    *Managementrised* (if such a word exists. It does now).  I find EM's
    flying my manager, her manager, I wonder if Mr. Palmer will get an
    EM !!!  Make the mind boggle if you ask me.
    
    If anything it shows that someone out their was concerned enough to
    bring this to the attention of the right people here.  Or the person
    who told me I wasted time writing this note must have wasted time
    reading this conference !!!! Talk about moral going down, ha just don't
    ask for just deserts 8-).
    
    I am the only one who has complained this year.  After my friends heard
    the shouting they told me that they too felt short changed.  Imagine
    paying $5 for a sandwich because they put two small pieces of pineapple in
    it.  They do not want to complain after seeing what I have gone
    through.  It's a good way to keep the moral up.
    
    I guess I have done it now no doubt I will get shouted at yet again for 
    "Internationalising* and it will get *Managementrised* as well.  Sorry
    if I have upset some people I thought a year or so is long enough, but
    I am glad I did it I feel so much better for having done so.
    
    Regards,
    
    Sunil

    Just an update.  I talked to one of the senior managers who was copied
    in on the EM, boy I feel even better the moral is getting high already. 
    It feels so good to be heard and seeing that there is action when a
    note is put in this conference make it a very special.
    
    Thanks to the fairy God mother/father for listening.  I will keep you
    all posted.  I hope people get soup spoons in ZKO, I hope we have
    better facilities everywhere.  It's good to eat a good lunch as it's
    sometimes the only main meal some people get or want.
    
    Regards,
    
    Sunil

    \nasser:
    
    I carry in my Playmate my two diet pepsi's, jug of water, apple,
    banananana, crackers, and usually something I pop into the
    microwave...a leftover, a pita, etc...my chain does allow me to get to
    the bathroom but only to the urinal and the first stall...if we want to
    go further, we have to carry a peeper...
    
    Some of us "brown-bag it" 'cause we can't afford heroes, or chicken curry
    and rice, or a gourmet duck on that salary of ours...afterall, not all
    of us make the type of money you do. 

    >I carry in my Playmate my two diet pepsi's, jug of water, apple,
    
    How did you get a cube big enough for both you and your girlfriend
    (carrying all that food)??

        Two quick comments.
        
        Brown-bagging lunch  doesn't  force  you  to  consume  it in your
        cubicle.  You  can  eat  your  lunch  anywhere,  including in the
        cafeteria.
        
        Secondly,  there's a suggestion  that  lunch  isn't  contribution
        time.  To me most  lunches  are great times to contribute.  I get
        to talk to people that I  otherwise  wouldn't  talk  to.    I get
        different perspectives on issues that I'm working.    Lunches are
        often the most productive times of the day.    Its  up  to  us to
        decide what to do with our time.
        
        Anker

Harry,
Although Ive had my share of 'road lunches' (not road kill) when I was a
DECrentabody (SWS) I looked forward to being at a customer site during lunch.
As I remember there wasnt a bad cafe in the lot. I even got invited to the
executive cafe once or twice....very posh and elegant...I felt REALLY out of
place with all of the bluebloods! :^)

>>There's usually NOTHING for miles in any direction. :-)
Have you considered fresh road kill grilled over a fire by the side of the
road? Ive heard from other DECies that, if done right, its pretty good. I
think our cafe here at ZK has a cookbook of roadkill recipes. If youd
like Ill get the title. :^)

					JimG 

>Have you considered fresh road kill grilled over a fire by the side of the
>road?

A cookbook came out a couple of years ago whose premise was that you can cook
meals by placing the food on top of your car's engine.  So there's no need
to start a fire by the side of the road.  Smokey will be happier too.

    
    I'm glad I looked at this note, I needed a good laff.

    re .26
    
    And to continue the diversion, how many people remember "sporks"?  (I
    think this is how it is spelled).  Those are the plastic combination
    spoon/forks?
    
    According to Paul Anderson, co-moderator of this conference there are
    several Internet news groups devoted to Sporks.  I have asked him to
    post pointers to them.

    RE: .47
    
    Maybe that's why /nasser's having difficulty with his soup; there are
    sporks where the soup spoons should be. ^)
    
    RE: .37
    
    /nasser
    
    Really, the time that I spend on making my lunch doesn't require that I
    get up any earlier in the morning. I usually make my lunch (and
    sometimes my son's) while I'm eating my breakfast. Are we allowed to
    talk about breakfast in this topic? ;)
    
    >i really dont think that normal DECeeees would do that.
    
    /nasser, please give us your insight, will future TFSO activity go
    after us 'brown-baggers'. After all, if Digital needs only the best
    employees (read = normal), then we should be let go according to your
    criteria/standards.
    
    Re: basenoter - IMO, we are all responsible for ensuring that we get
    proper nourishment, not a cafeteria/restaurant which may happen to be
    in a Digital facility. It should also be our responsibility to take our
    business elsewhere if we feel that the prices are too expensive for the
    portion size. If going out to obtain a better value isn't appropriate
    due to increased time, try bringing your own; you can make as big a
    meal as you'd like, and if it isn't right, you only have yourself to
    complain to.
    
    and we wonder why we're losing money!

.47>    several Internet news groups devoted to Sporks.  
    
    No, no, no ... he meant Sports, not Sporks!
    
    I want everybody to know the ZKO cafeteria apparently is no longer
    offering Diet Polar Orange Drink in its cold drink case. Please don't
    make any special trips (boondoggles) here expecting to find it.
    
    Sunil, you've got every right to complain. And your management should
    feel proud of themselves. While not a trivial complaint, if that's the
    biggest issue they have to worry about I'd say they're doing just fine.
    Lunch is on me next time I'm in Sydney. Tell you what: order two meat-
    based meals and we'll swap your meat for my vegetables.
    
      John  

>According to Paul Anderson, co-moderator of this conference there are
>several Internet news groups devoted to Sporks.  I have asked him to

Well, you asked:

	alt.plastic.utensils.spork.spork! 1
	alt.plastic.utensils.spork.spork.spork! 1-68
	alt.utensils.spork! 1-9

    Yes, Officer, I'll go quietly.
    
    I have in my office not one, but two soup spoons.  One is even made of
    metal and not plastic.  Looks like I neglected to return them after
    a going-away potluck some weeks ago (at which I was attempting to stir
    a pot of chili with a soup spoon for want of an honest serving spoon).
    
    Dick

    
Actually nassar, the problem of not having a soupspoon is easy
to solve with a bit of creative thinking.

For example,

If no spoons are available, just pick up the bowl, hold it at 
about mouth level and blow firmly across the top. With a bit 
of practice, you may be able to blow long filiments of soup completely 
across the table and onto your dining-partner's shirt. Perhaps 
you may find a favorable breeze from the air conditioning and 
be able to soak people for several tables around. Also, this is 
quite healthy exercise, in that it strenghtens the breath. If 
there is no breeze, you might purloin a soda straw from the soft 
drink section and use it as an impromptu squirtgun. The entire cafeteria 
will be amused by the shrieks of those who find your clam chowder in 
their hair. 

Once your soup has cooled through the turboisosonate method, it 
will be ready to eat. Just bring the bowl to your lips and slurp. 
Be sure the cafeteria staff realizes how much you appreciate their food:
SLURP LOUDLY. This may also empty several more tables in your vicinity, 
so you'll be able to stretch your legs out more. Good for the digestion.
Don't be reluctant to strain the soup between your teeth. That's why
Mommy Nature put gaps there. Besides, you can allways pick out the
non-liquid ingredients with your fingers. (A friendly hint: if you 
let your fingernails grow, you can use them to spear any left-over
chunks.) A social note: If you are having wonton soup, be sure upon 
completion to belch loudly, thus (so to speak) rising to the spirit 
of the occasion.

After a while, you'll even find that people will actually bring in 
spoons for you. Perhaps you'll be able to trade with your fellow 
slurpers and acquire an entire service for eight. Insist on matched
patterns. Some people might even bring in delicious and nutricious 
home cooked dishes for you, especially cookies and anything else 
that cannot possibly be made liquid.

Your Friend,

Ed Eck.

"I dine alone, thanks."

    G'Day All,
    		I guess what all sussed, but best expressed in .46
    You have to ..... @ .0 ... what a Wo???
    
    Scott

    G'day All,

    Gee what a good laugh this has been some people have laughed so much
    around this office reading this note, they have tears in their eyes. 
    I have even forgotten about my stomach/tank making rumbling noises. 
    All I wanted was more veg. sounds like a scene from Scrooge, perhaps we
    could make a play out of this.  Perhaps Digital could branch out into
    making a soap opera.

    Everyone has seen the funny side of this soap opera, I have the
    facilities manager could also have a laugh.  I guess the restaurant
    feels quite stupid when she implied no one cared.  To be honest the
    facilities manager had asked the sub-contractor to make sure that
    people were given a good meal.  I guess the sub-contractor will think
    twice before giving such small portions.
    
    Shame I can't tell ya all what it was like when someone got a bit upset
    about this note.  I guess this person when s/he looks back at all of
    this will no doubt have good laugh.  Maybe I should offer to buy them a
    lunch !!!!
    
    One thing for sure lunch time can be very productive in that some of
    the sales people start asking questions about what platform say DEC
    MAILworks runs on, who to contact etc.  I know a couple of times people
    have found the information needed to sent to the customer.  There is
    more to luch then just munch !!!!
    
    Thanks for the laugh !!! Someone ain't goin' to be too happy seeing 50
    plus replies to this topic on Monday morning.
    
    Have fun,
    
    Sunil

    Sunil,
    
    Getting back to your original point....contact your local purchasing
    organization and find out who manages the contract for this
    particular supplier.  All suppliers -- even monopolistic ones like
    the catering service -- are required to maintain certain standards
    with regards to quality, service and cost value.  Granted the
    cafeterias are a convenience to Digital employees, but that does not
    mean that the caterer can take undue advantage of that convenience.

    I, too, had a terrible experience at a Digital cafeteria.  The forks
    were in the LEFT utensil holder instead of the MIDDLE utensil holder on
    the server rack.  I couldn't BELIEVE this!  The forks are ALWAYS
    supposed to be in the LEFT utensil holder!  EVERYONE knows this!  It
    was an AWFUL experience and I'm STILL traumatized!
    
    Who should I contact?  What should I do about this abominable
    situation?  I realize that our profitability is dropping, my fellow
    workers are being layed off, etc. but, DAMMIT, this is MORE IMPORTANT!
    I WILL NOT REACH IN THE CENTER BIN FOR MY FORKS AND I WANT EVERYONE TO
    KNOW IT!
    
    						Tex

    \Tex, here in ZKO we have the utinsels marked with labeles
    to tell us DECeeees what the utinsel is. the forks are makred
    "forks" and the tea spoons are marked "soup spoons" and the knifes
    and marked "knifes" so forth.
    
    this way they can move the the thing around but DECeeees will not be
    confused (as in your cafeteria) becuase DECeeees can read the label and
    figure what is the utensiles they are looking at is independent of
    where its location is.
    
    \bye
    \nasser
    

    Nasser, are you telling me that the cafeteria management has purposely
    engaged in a CONSPIRACY to HARASS us?  There are labels available and
    they're PURPOSEFULLY NOT USING THEM?  This is an OUTRAGE!  If my tea
    spoons were marked "soup spoons" like the ones at ZKO, I would know
    what to do, (even though the markings would then be independent of the
    actual contents).  
    
    Nasser, could you forward me the address of the VP in charge of Food 
    Services Utensil Labeling for Digital Worldwide?  I brought this whole
    situation up to my unit manager and he said that, given all the time
    and effort I had spent on this, he would make sure I got The Forks
    Shoved Over, but they're still right where they were!
    
    (I don't understand why he just used the initials, though.  Why
    couldn't he just say "The Forks Shoved Over"?  Go figure!)
    
    						Tex

    wrt: .56 and .58 -- well done!

Tex,
Im so glad that someone has brought this rather profound problem into the open.
It just puts my whole day off when the utensils arent properly ordered. Some
nights I wakeup with cold sweats wondering what tommorrows trip to the cafe
will bring. I just cant go on living like this. What really incenses me is
that proper VP attention hasnt been given to finding a solution. I mean they
waste all this time on coming up with silly trade words  and the like but dont
spend any time on really pressing issues like the one you so aptly articulated.
The problem with this company isnt the layoffs or morale or customer
statisfaction. Quite plainly and BLUNTLY stated its improper ordering of
eating utensils in the cafe. Anyone who says  different just doesnt understand
the current world business and econonmic climate. In this global economy there
just isnt any place for eating utensils that arent properly labelled AND in the
proper place AND in the proper bin! Companies who ignore this will be a thing
of the past. I sure hope the SLT has a clear and firm grasp of this problem.
If they dont Digital is history. Im sorry if Ive offended anyone with my
forthrightness but this just had to be said. Its a matter of saving this company
from sure ruin.

You folks forgot to mention the Napkin dispensers!

I'm upset.

JIm

    
    and what about these funny spoon-fork combinations??????
    
    
    bc
    

Napkins? Sporks? Those are certainly peripheral to the potentially crippling
problem of unordered eating utensils. Its all a matter getting your priorities
right. The most pressing problem facing this company is the utensil ordering
problem! What has to happen to wake you people up? It doesnt matter how
satisfied our customers are if they happen to see (or be informed thru the
grapevine) that the eating utensils in Digital cafes are out of order! Ive
seen it happen time and again. The cheerful carefree customer confronted by
unordered eating utensils! Reaction ranges from embarassment and anger to
physical illness. How can we continue to treat our valued customers this
way and still exist as a viable company?

    Although I see Napkins and Sporks as important to the overall service
    level of our company cafeteria, I have to agree with Goddard that THESE
    ARE PERIPHERAL ITEMS!  Are we on a par with Microsoft's cafeteria
    facilities?  Well, certainly NOT AT MY CAFETERIA, I'll tell you!  What
    if someone visiting from Microsoft NEEDED A FORK?  I shudder!
    
    I'm calling all the food service managers to arrange a UTENSIL
    PLACEMENT meeting.  This will probably take up the rest of my week, but
    my manager says that's fine, because I've got "lots of free time coming
    available", he says.  Thank GOD I've got a supportive manager in this
    issue!

    Tex:
    
    Are your utensils ordered in Big-endian or Little-endian fashion?
    
    There are serious COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY issues here!

    
    ref .65
    
            also the speed at which they are ordered, and also which
    bus carries them for transportation purposes.
    

Tex,
I'm glad to see how diligent you are at 'carrying the ball' on this one.
It makes me fell proud to see fellow employees working for the good of the
company, especially on such an important issue! However, I must take issue
with the means youre using. I know for a fact that DEC standard DEC131313
already addresses utensil placement along with some other minor cafe protocol
issues. I see the problem as a matter of enforcment rather than ignorance. Ive
not said anything about this in public until now but Im sure that this whole
problem is really a CONSPIRACY perpetrated by someone(s) in UPPER management. My
sources are vague on this point but think about it. How could all Digital cafes
operate in such a seamlessly shameful manner? I submit that any right minded
individual would see immediately that this couldnt happen without a conspirator.
I ask you to join with me in seeing that DEC standard DEC131313
is equitably enforced for the good of the company, our business partners and
our current customers. With your help we can once again be a significant player
in the computer industry whose market share was so brutily torn from us by
unordered cafe eating utensils. It took a long time to reach this point and
solutions wont be quick or easy. However I call on all employees to do their
part in our recovery. Become active in cafe watchdog groups and above all
question utensil placement by cafe employees. As a parting admonition I would
encourage each employee to secure a copy of DEC standard DEC131313 to read and
study. No company is any better than the collective knowledge base of its
employees.

>>    Are your utensils ordered in Big-endian or Little-endian fashion?
>>    There are serious COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY issues here!
Foul! Both subjects, COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY, are nonissues.
Youre trying to cloud the real problem by ratholing this topic! Please stop
so that we can get on with the important work of saving the company. Its
quite plain even to the most casual observer that all cafe eating utensils
are objects. One simply needs to request fork, spoon, etc. to yeild the
proper result. 

    RE .65 AND .67
    
    Our utensils ARE ordered in Little-endian fashion, THANK GOD, as per
    DEC131313!  Although I appreciate Goddard's efforts to keep this topic
    from RATHOLING I DO appreciate the concern and am glad to see THERE ARE
    OTHERS JUST AS CONCERNED AS I AM about CAFETERIA ISSUES!
    
    Press KP7 to add UTNSLS::COMPETITIVE_ADVANTAGE.  The postscript, text,
    and bookreader copies of DEC131313 are in notes 1426.0,.1, and .2
    respectively.  I advise everyone to READ THEM NOW while we STILL HAVE
    JOBS!  That was my manager's advice to me, and it sounded good!
    
    						Tex

                      <<< Note 2987.68 by EVMS::GODDARD >>>

>>>    Are your utensils ordered in Big-endian or Little-endian fashion?
>>>    There are serious COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY issues here!
>Foul! Both subjects, COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY, are nonissues.
    
    Perhaps COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY are non-issues, but
    non-conformance with Little-endian utensil ordering is the crux 
    of the company's problems.
    
    I'm relieved to hear that Tex's cafeteria complies with DEC131313
    on this crucial issue.

    Yes, we ARE COMPLIANT with DEC131313 regarding UTENSIL ORDERING,
    specifically Little-endian orientation.  Unfortunately, I'm afraid that
    OTHER NON-COMPLIANT PROCEDURES have been introduced by a SHODDY
    MANAGEMENT TEAM, who I believe are CONSPIRING TO CHEAT US PERSONALLY
    and may be adversely affecting our cafeteria performance to LESSEN OUR
    COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE!  I can't prove it (yet) but, as a previous noter 
    stated, it's FAIRLY OBVIOUS, don't you think?
    
    WHY AREN'T MORE PEOPLE CONCERNED!?!  WAKE UP out there, folks, because
    I can assure you that IBM and HP have THEIR FORKS CORRECTLY BINNED! 
    Did Wang?  Noooooo!  Think about it!

    G'day All,

    I hope that Tex is annoyed by my "G'day" !!!

    Well I have become very popular over here at lunch times, the cafeteria
    staff don't even ask me if I want more I just get more.  All those who
    come to lunch with me get more without asking, those who don't come to
    lunch with me don't get more.  I wonder if these will people will like me 
    in a few months time when they realise that they now weigh a healthy 
    ton ? !!!!
    
    Sunil

    
                        <<< Note 2987.61 by MR3MI1::BORZUMATO >>>
    
    You folks forgot to mention the Napkin dispensers!
    
    I'm upset.
    
    JIm
    
    
    	I agree with Jim - let's hear it for the Napkins and their
    dispensers!
    
    	I think we should focus in on this problem, ramp up our efforts in
    bringing this problem up to the surface!  I can see that DEC standard
    DEC131313 is not being adhered to on this matter of the Napkins.
    
    	This is surely a vital part of our efforts to focus on the customer
    as a company, not that the customer is only one company, of course, but
    don't let this detail spoil our efforts to get this whole nasty
    cover-up sorted out!
    
    	Come on then, don't let Jim continue in his misery - a misery that
    we ourselves have caused by failing him in ignoring the vital question
    of the Napkins AND their dispenser!
    
    				Malcolm.

    While concern for napkins is all well & good I am writing in hopes of
    maintaining our valuable newfound Management Focus on tableware bin
    order.  Fortunately however we as a Corporation are well in command of
    Cluster Technology, thus I humbly submit that we fork a process to deal
    with this new issue.
    

    What does the DEC standard say regarding "soda straws"?  Should they be
    the flexible kind or the straight kind?  I assume that the standard
    says that they should be wrapped.  In some facilities I notice that the
    straws are simply dispensed from the box they are packed in.   In other
    facilities they are removed from the box and placed in another
    container for dispensing.  Is this according to the standard?

    	Since my father-in-law invented the bendy straw (before he retired
    he was a hospital pharmacist, and concerned about the problems of
    feeding patients in intensive care) I could probably get an
    authoritative answer. However, I suspect his standards of hygiene would
    not be met by the average DEC canteen.

Im very sorry to see this topic spiral into the abyss if napkins, straws
and endian ordering. See, we cant even focus on and track the problem to
closure! Let me state, again, that DEC131313 is a narrowly focused document
that deals with the HEART of the problem - utensil ordering. Napkins, straws,
etc. are only peripheral issues. I feel that until the SLT and Palmer in
specific become fully involved in a postitive way this company will continue on
its present diasterous. As I understand it though the executive cafe where the
SLT takes lunch DOES conform to DEC131313. Middle management makes sure that the
standard is met so that no serious inquiry can take place...some have called
this utensil piping. I feel that until the SLT enters the real world nothing
substantive will be accomplished. Some really tough decisions about utensil
ordering need to be made but once done will foster future financial health for
the company. Maybe the problem is that no organization is SPECIFICALLY charterd
to see DEC131313 equitably applied to ALL Digital cafes. I would certainly
welcome your comments and insights about this.

On a bright note Bob Palmer visited our facility this week and came within
several hundred feet of the cafe. I feel that this is a real victory! I
believe no senior manager, since KO left, has come with several miles of the
Digital cafe. So while he never actually saw the cafe I feel certain this was a
signal that he knows the problem exists but is encountering some sort of
resistance that doesnt allow him to actually enter the cafe and view the
unordered utensils. Chin up Bob, were with you!

Re .70
>>    Perhaps COMPATIBILITY and INTEROPERABILITY are non-issues, but
>>    non-conformance with Little-endian utensil ordering is the crux 
>>    of the company's problems.
Here again I feel you just havent a full grasp of THE problem. DEC131313
was never created to address the endian ordering of utensils. Until we can
solve the rudimentary problem...simple ordering...then adding the endian
dimension will just needlessly complicate the process.

.69
>>    Our utensils ARE ordered in Little-endian fashion, THANK GOD, as per
>>    DEC131313!
Tex,
DEC131313 doesnt address the endian issue! Either youve misunderstood DEC131313,
have an obsolete copy or have a purposely wrong copy. Ive heard rumors lately
that some in middle management have tampered with the original to purposely
mislead their superiors...turf protection so to speak. Its really so sad to see
this blowup into infighting with all the sordid politics and turf wars.
Imagine the embarassment wed all feel if this was ever leaked to the trade
press. Wed be the laughing stock of the industry...'Digital Incapable of Proper
Utensil Ordering'! It would only confirm what most of our customers have already
figured out for themselves.

>>  This will probably take up the rest of my week, but
>>    my manager says that's fine, because I've got "lots of free time coming
>>    available", he says.  Thank GOD I've got a supportive manager in this
>>    issue!
Oh that I wish all managers took THE problem so seriously. Kudos to a most
astute man! There are still some in authority that have a vision for this
company! Tex, I would feel very proud to work for such a leader!

    
    
    You know what gets my goat?? We have none of those little packets of
    mayo in the lunchroom at our site. Yea we have sporks , little paper
    packets of salt and pepper and napkins but no mayo. Who can I talk to
    about this?? This is an outrage. Have you ever tryed to eat a vending
    machine ham sandwich without a little packet of mayo??? I'm so mad
    about this I could scream.

    
    	Well, ::SHERRILL, please scream quietly!
    
    				Malcolm.

    re: Goddard's note on DEC131313 missive not addressing Little-endian,
    	Big-endian orientation.  He's RIGHT, although I DO remember 
    	reading it in a prior version (which I can't seem to find), I
    	do NOT find any mention of this in the current version.  This,
    	in itself, is SUSPICIOUS!  Does anyone know if it was covered in
    	another document?  Does anyone have ;-1 of DEC131313?  I keep
    	getting "node currently not reachable" at UTNSLS::.  Anyone?
    
    re: Sherrill and the mayo packets.  What is your hidden agenda here,
    	Sherrill?  This topic has NOTHING TO DO WITH CONDIMENTS!  Are
    	you PUROSEFULLY trying to subvert this whole issue?  Please
    	be aware I have requested moderator intervention.  This company
    	will NEVER turn around if we can't STAY FOCUSED!
    
    						Tex

    RE: .79  by SCCAT::SHERRILL 
    
    >You know what gets my goat?? ...
    
    My cubicle neighbor just came back from a trip to Australia where she
    was served goat stew.  Was it yours?
    

Tex,
Im glad to see that weve gotten the documentation problems straightened
out.

>>What is your hidden agenda here,
>>Sherrill?  This topic has NOTHING TO DO WITH CONDIMENTS!
Quite right! What is your hidden agenda? Are you in managment?

Id like to update the readership about current happenings. I got a call
this morning from the office of the VP in charge of VPs not directly reporting
to the SLT. Apparently his office has been monitoring this string and would
like to get more information about the problem. He asked me to call (8009462737)
the VP in charge of VPs in charge of internal company affairs and fill them in
on whats known to date about utensil ordered, state of the cafes, etc.
The person who answered said that the function had moved and that I should
call the VP of 800 numbers to get the right phone number. (The VP of
800 numbers can be reached at 8008000484.) Well, to make a long story short
I just got done ringing up my 110th 800 number since I talked with the VP in
charge of VPs not directly reporting to the SLT which yeilded yet another
800 number. I had no idea Digital was such a complex entity! This gave me
an idea that we might contact those in charge of company structure to help
solve the utensil ordering problem. I think theyd be a big help since theyre
used to working on complex problems.   

    Well, nobody can do anything until the following steps have been taken
    and appropriate documentation has been created, reviewed, revised,
    re-reviewed, signed, sealed, delivered and stored:
    
    Opportunity Evaluation
    Preliminary Analysis
    Requirements Gathering
    Functional Specification
    Design Specification
    
    Any attempts to subvert or controvert this process will be dealt with
    harshly by our new VP from Singapore.
    
    8-}

    RE: .76
    
    You mention 'soda straws', but I have to assume that you are referring
    to straws used in the consumption of carbonated beverages. Bear in
    mind, that here in Massachusetts, we refer to such beverages as
    'tonic', while other parts of the country refer to them as 'soda' or
    'pop'. Not to exclude the application with non-carbonated beverages
    such as iced tea or iced coffee, BTW.
    
    Not to off on a tangent, but have you ever asked for an ice cream cone
    with jimmies outside of Massachusetts? Same principle.
    
    HTH,
    
    kjg
    

    re .85
    
    And what does the standard say about "Subs".  In other parts of the
    country (Groton, CT for example) a sub is a ship that sails under the
    water.  Here in Massachusetts a sub is a type of sandwich.

    
    And "A 'Hero' Ain't Nothin' But a Sandwich."
    
    And do you make your black-and-white frapps with chocolate icecream
    and vanilla syrup? Or with vanilla icrcream and chocolate syrup? Or
    don't you put icecream in a frappe (or milkshake or cabinet)? And
    is an omlet with ham a Western, an Eastern or a Denver?
    
    Geez--now I'm hungry...

Isn't there a standard that requires food to be labelled in the local
terminology?  A few weeks ago, the MRO1 cafeteria (Marlborough Massachusetts)
served a grinder by the inch but had it labelled a "hoagie".  I commented that
the term "grinder" or "sub" should have been used, but the server just scrunched
up her face.  I guess she was born in Trenton and thought it was all right to
call a grinder a "hoagie" in Massachusetts.  At least they didn't call it a
"torpedo".

I guess whatever operating system or application run by the cafeteria people
doesn't allow for local customization.  I thought all Digital applications were
to be internationalized.

Paul, who_hesitates_to_call_this_a_rathole_since_this_is_a_cafeteria_topic

P.S.  It would be funny if someone from Boston went to the Sydney cafeteria and
      ordered a grinder, a tonic, and a frappe.

    Don't forget the egg cream and tonic.
    
    				Steve

Im sorry that I haven't gotten back with an update on my progress...
things have been busy. I just called my 924th 800 number. I
fear that progress on this front will be slow. At one point I felt
certain that I had gotten the right office (Office of the
VP in charge of executive pay raises (8002585377)) but alas
they referred me to yet another 800 number. Oh well the quest
continues!

On a bright note spring has finally come to New England. The
weather has warmed evidenced by the huge drops of sweat exuded
from BPs brow during the Q3 announcement.

On to new business...

In view of the recent past (the Q3 results) with all of its
controversy and discussion I thought it time for a
reality check. I just cant believe what Im reading in this
conference! Turning battleships, pay cuts, kicking BP out, 
ad nauseam! Whats wrong with you folks? In general I thought the
constituency of this esteemed conference were by and large very
intellectual. What Ive heard lately  belies that...get a grip guys!
Even to the most casual observer its PLAIN that Digital's financial
woes stem from cafe utensils that arent in PROPER order. Fortune, Money,
WSJ and the National Enquirer (among others) all agree that the problem
is utensil ordering. What else has to happen before you people wakeup?
You're looking for a plan? OK heres one! Lets empower employees to
reassess and redistribute utensils in an extremely local topology as
dictated by DECSTD 131313 thus producing a nontemporary closure to the
anaomolous paradigm currently implemented in Digital cafes. I know exactly
what you're thinking....'but isn't that managements job?'.
Right, but closure may be unattainable unless employee empowerment is
implemented and deployed rapidly in accord with DECSTD 131313 (ISO 13.13.13,
ANSI 13.1.13.1.13) without recourse to escalation through management
channels and/or chains whose charter may or may not address the paradigm
under consideration and without regard to their present state of
reorganization. Im one step ahead of you...I bet your asking 'but wasnt all
of this supposed to have been taken care of by the improved supply chain or
the new UBU (Utensil Business Unit)?'. I believe that the utensil problem
was never meant to be solved by the supply chain. This avenue was meant to
supply physical rather than logical entities. On the other hand the UBU
was chartered, organized, reorganized and finally reorganized (they've only
existed for a month hence the low number of reorgs) to supply the logical
entities of any random enterprise solution exclusively dealing with utensils.
As you have probably guessed the supply chain and UBU exist as
separate units. So, while the supply chain can be called on to deliever
deliverables within their ROI, NOS and COG the UBU can only discuss the
problem when not reorganizing. Thus you can plainly see why employee
empowerment is a vital part of bring Digital back to profitability. I hope
this has prompted those 'fence sitters' in our midst to action. Well Im
sorry once again for being so overwrought but Digital has so much potential
I just cant bear to see it wasted. It was a childhood dream of mine to labor
for this company. I feel proud to wear the burgundy & white! Until we
meet again. BTW kudos to all who have joined the cause!

BTW some of my replies contain secret messages...Ill buy the first respondant
who correctly decodes all of them a coke....no joke! (This offer is void to
members of my immediate group.) Im alittle diappointed though that no one found
them without having to be told theyre there. :^( Happy hunting!

re: .94

Gak! Certainly a mal-nourished noter (or editor)...

Lee

    
    
    Hey, anyone hear anything about the Boxboro cafeteria?