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Since no one else has any ideas on how to raise children, I though I
would share some of mine. The most important concepts, IMHO, are to
always be honest in your dealings with your children; allow them as
much agency as they can handle; and teach them how to live through the
scriptures.
Besides the experiences of Job, 1 Nephi 3:7, and 1 Cor. 10:13, I like
to keep my perspective straight with the following D&C scripture :
D&C 122:7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the
hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon
thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge
conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy;
if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine
to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell
shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son,
that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall
be for thy good.
D&C 122:8 The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Are thou
greater than he?
The discourse of King Benjamin in Mosiah also helps us to keep our
perspective along with this promise in D&C :
D&C 121:7 My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine
afflictions shall be but a small moment;
D&C 121:8 And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on
high; thou shall triumph over all thy foes.
We have the ability to overcome any adversity thrown against us, but it
is not all that easy to maintain and keep your perspective. That is
why it is so important to keep the lines open with the one who can give
us the strength to continue on.
In dealing with children, I have also found the follow scriptures to be
of great value :
D&C 121:41 No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by
virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-
suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love
unfeigned;
D&C 121:42 By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly
enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile--
D&C 121:43 Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the
Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase
of love toward him whom thou has reproved, lest he esteem
thee to be his enemy;
D&C 121:44 That he may know that thy faithfulness is stronger than
the cords of death.
D&C 121:45 Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and
to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy
thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong
in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood
shall distill upon thy soul as the dews from heaven.
D&C 121:46 The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy
scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth;
and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and
without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever
and ever.
Once the rules, guidelines, etc. have been established, then stick to
them with appropriate consequences. No matter what happens to one
child, always remember that the other children are still there and
hurting just as much as you are even if in a different way.
I believe that "goodly parents" happen when they truly love their
children enough to allow them to make mistakes (agency) even after
they have been thoroughly trained in the ways of the Lord. Then if
they choose that which is not the way their parents would have them
choose, the parents still should love them in all their endeavors.
Charles
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