T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
---|
918.1 | | NOATAK::BLAZEK | non sono una signora | Wed Jul 17 1991 13:29 | 8 |
|
I'm feeling extremely distressed over how hopeless it seems,
and how helpless I feel, sometimes.
This shit just never stops, does it.
Carla
|
918.2 | | PENUTS::BATOR | | Wed Jul 17 1991 13:35 | 4 |
| This story is on page 14 of today's Boston Globe. It seems
the man was raping his 3 year old niece, in rush hour, in front
of lots of traffic on the FDR highway in NYC and NO ONE did
anything except for the tow truck driver who caught the man!
|
918.3 | Chalk it up along with the others... | SMURF::SMURF::BINDER | Simplicitas gratia simplicitatis | Wed Jul 17 1991 13:38 | 8 |
| It's Kitty Genovese all over again. People are unwilling to become
involved -- "Hey, I could get hurt, and anyway it's not *my* problem, I
don't even know the kid. And if I do something, it'll be no end of
hassle with the cops and all."
How sick are we, anyway?
-d
|
918.4 | | BTOVT::THIGPEN_S | you meant ME??? | Wed Jul 17 1991 13:47 | 3 |
| thank god for that man, the tow-truck driver.
Sara
|
918.5 | not an excuse, however | RUTLND::JOHNSTON | bean sidhe ... with an attitude | Wed Jul 17 1991 13:49 | 34 |
| re. Why do people just watch?
I don't believe that can all be written off to desensitisation. I
believe that a much larger contributing factor is a growing sense of
helplessness and distance.
People are bombarded with images of war casualties, teen suicide,
murders, arson, the S&L fiasco, drug trafficking, starving children,
the homeless, AIDS ... the list goes on.
I know quite a few people that see governments and 'The Powerful'
continually fail at assuaging the horror, that look at their small
selves and feel despair and impotence in the face of overwhelming
issues and events.
Some escape these small feelings by avoiding or denying the problem.
When something like this is played out in your face, it's hard to
deny; but there's still the numbing inertia of helplessness -- and then
later guilt.
Then sometimes there's disbelief. Living in denial, slows the
processing speed when one comes face to face with the unthinkable.
I know this first hand from an experience I had some years ago. I was
sitting talking with Rick and another couple in a grove late one night
when a man and woman came into view [about 100 ft away] apparently
arguing and pushing each other. It took me a full minute to grasp that
she was being assaulted, _despite_ having lived through something very
similar just three months earlier. And no one with me believed me -- it
was too horrible to face what was happening in front of them -- until I
started screaming and running at the man, none of them moved. Not
because they didn't care, but because they couldn't comprehend.
Annie
|
918.6 | | ASDG::GASSAWAY | Insert clever personal name here | Wed Jul 17 1991 14:02 | 7 |
| Why don't people get involved?
Maybe they're afraid of a lawsuit.
Like giving someone CPR and having them die anyway, family of deceased
sues you for negligence in the death.
Lisa
|
918.7 | Set Cynicism on HIGH | ASDG::FOSTER | Calico Cat | Wed Jul 17 1991 14:09 | 13 |
|
Ever since Kitty Genovese (for those who don't know, I believe it is an
incident in which a woman was beaten to death, possibly in broad
daylight, in an area where there were plenty of observers but no one
reported it or tried to save her), I have assumed that if something
happened to me in New York City, I could expect NO assistance. I've met
a LOT of New Yorkers, and by and large, they do seem desensitized.
Perhaps in part from feeling helpless, in part from feeling
overwhelmed, but also it seems that each individual act is a drop in
the bucket. AND NYC is an area where you do run a high risk of
retaliation if you interfere with a "disciplining process".
In such a setting, crime becomes a virtual spectator sport.
|
918.8 | | BTOVT::THIGPEN_S | you meant ME??? | Wed Jul 17 1991 14:23 | 12 |
| nit to .6 --
If you have a current certification in CPR, and you do CPR on a person who is
injured by it or who dies (you can hurt or even kill someone even doing CPR
correctly, depending on age & physical condition & injuries), the organization
that certified you will back you in court if you are sued. I believe no one
in such a position has ever been successfully sued.
That's what the Amer.RedCross &/or HeartAssoc have always told me in CPR
courses.
Sara
|
918.9 | History | SMURF::SMURF::BINDER | Simplicitas gratia simplicitatis | Wed Jul 17 1991 14:30 | 13 |
| Kitty Genovese, a pretty young woman, was stabbed to death by a lone
assailant late one evening while returning from her job as a nurse.
The incident occurred on a public street in her own neighborhood, in
full view of at least 43 witnesses, none of whom did anything to
prevent or stop the attack. The number of withesses was fixed by a
subsequent police investigation; it is quoted in the report as "at
least" because only 43 of the people interviewed admitted to having
seen anything.
Desensitization is clearly not limited to New York, 'ren; it's just
acknowledged more freely when New York is the topic of conversation.
-d
|
918.10 | | COGITO::SULLIVAN | Singing for our lives! | Wed Jul 17 1991 14:34 | 24 |
|
How horrible. I can't even describe how sickened and hopeless I feel.
I would think that especially because the victim was a child, people would
intervene. When witnesses were questioned in the Kitty Genovese
murder, many said that they thought it was her husband. She was
stabbed dozens of times but no major artery was severed -- she could
have been saved. I don't know if we can chalk this up to the jadedness
of the people of NYC, though I'm sure they are more desensitized to
violence and crime than others. I've never been one to pray, but if I
were, I would pray that if I'm ever witness to such a horrible crime, I
do something to help.
Justine
There is a kind of shock that sets in when you see something like this
happening -- it can't be. I must be wrong. Is anyone else doing
anything? Once when my sweetie and I were in San Francisco, we saw a
man getting beat up (robbed?) by a group of men (on a Sunday morning!).
We were across the street, and we stood there a while watching --
what's happening? Finally, (after a minute or so) we found a phone and
called the police -- it certainly didn't seem safe to intervene when we
were so outnumbered.. It's possible to be safe and still do something.
|
918.11 | ex | HYEND::SVAILLANT | | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:10 | 4 |
| I hope I never turn my back on a 3 year old who needs help. the pain
from this whole situation is just unreal to me.
I hope those who stood by and watched had a good nights sleep.
|
918.12 | wonder if they all think they love children? | CARTUN::NOONAN | Collarless pets UNITE! | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:19 | 7 |
| You know, there are people who think I am terrible for not wanting
children. But I would NEVER stand by and watch that! I am terrified
of physical confrontation, but I would NEVER stand by and watch that!
gack
E Grace
|
918.13 | | TALLIS::TORNELL | | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:33 | 18 |
| The song goes: "All's quiet on West 23rd. Nobody saw her, nobody
heard". It came out shortly after the Genovese stabbing. The incident
was shocking and it made news because this kind of thing was *new*. It's
fitting that such jadedness began in NYC, but that was over 20 years
ago and it's now spread. To Montreal, to Boston, to Kenya, the
Phillipines, and it's continuing to spread. So much so that it's no
longer new enough to be news anymore. Just another day in the life.
"Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world and everywhere the blood-dimmed
tide is loosed. The best lack all conviction while the worst are full
of passionate intensity."
Read Yeat's "The Second Coming". Maybe you'll begin to understand.
I reiterate - We've lost it, folks. And as the world slides into the
sewer...
S.
|
918.14 | | CGVAX2::CONNELL | CHAOS IS GREAT. | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:41 | 14 |
| To read what E Grace just said, knowing her nonviolence religious
beliefs and knowing how strong they are, truly gives me hope. Even in
the face of what we just read in the base note, it still gives me hope.
If a nonviolent member of a pacifist religion can make that statement,
then in the long run we will win. It is a dirty crying abomination that
these acts still must occur to get us to peace.
Maybe we could take out a full page add in the paper where this
happened, expressing our dismay and shock, not only at the act, but at
the apathy of the witnesses. If it only shames one into acting next
time, then it will be worth it. I'll donate to that.
PJ
|
918.15 | Still relevant | DECXPS::HENDERSON | Thinking a lot about less & less | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:48 | 19 |
|
Ah, look outside the window there's a woman being grabbed
they've dragged her to the bushes and now she's being stabbed
maybe we should call the cops and try to stop the pain
but we've got to move and mighty soon
'cause it looks like its gonna rain
And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody
outside a small circle of friends..
Phil Ochs ~1965
|
918.16 | Part of the problem | SMURF::SMURF::BINDER | Simplicitas gratia simplicitatis | Wed Jul 17 1991 15:48 | 17 |
| Social psychologists say that part of the reason for our lack of social
conscience -- our general madness, if you please -- is population
pressure.
Experiments with rats showed that when the population in a given space
exceeds a certain density the rats go off their trolleys. The
experimenters noted in their paper that it was necessary to create the
conditions artificially; rats do not willingly breed themselves into
overpopulation. In fact, their birthrate is adjusted by conditions;
when the population declines, females have larger litters, and when the
population rises, litter size decreases.
$ set note/mode=slightly_sarcastic
We humans do not appear to have such restraint...
-d
|
918.17 | medical studies are bad enough - sociologically speaking, I am not a rat | TLE::DBANG::carroll | A woman full of fire | Wed Jul 17 1991 16:37 | 4 |
| For some reason, I have always been skeptical about applying studies done
on rat sociology to humans.
D!
|
918.18 | | SA1794::CHARBONND | in disgrace with fortune | Wed Jul 17 1991 16:40 | 1 |
| me too, rats don't hold a candle to humans in the visciousness dept.
|
918.19 | this may be a rathole, but.... | CARTUN::NOONAN | Collarless pets UNITE! | Wed Jul 17 1991 16:48 | 16 |
| PJ,
my non-violence would not be an issue. I would just have to find some
way to stop it without harming the man...because, no matter what, I
believe there is that of God in *him* also. But calling the police
would not be so onerous an action, trying to restrain the man....
*SOMETHING*
I just couldn't stand by.
This is not at all contradictory with my belief in pacifistic action.
You see, that is the crux; it is not passivism, it is pacifism. There
is a difference.
E Grace, Li.C.H.T.
|
918.20 | please excuse my rambling style, folks | ASDS::BARLOW | i THINK i can, i THINK i can... | Wed Jul 17 1991 17:08 | 42 |
|
At this point, I am so disappointed in our society. Remember
a year or two ago when people burned to death in their car at
a MASS toll booth while many people watched? This isn't just
New York.
Last tuesday, I got out of the shower to hear a woman screaming,
"Call 911, call 911! my baby fell out the window!" Much to my
husband's dismay, I shouted to her to stay with her child and not
to move her in any way. I phoned 911 and it rang 4 times, by that
point the woman screamed that someone else had called them and to
please come help her. I started to just run, (in my bathrobe).
Since we live in a rotten neighborhood my husband had a fit,
screaming at me to get dressed. I did and ran out. One of my other
neighbors had just gotten there a couple of seconds before and
had people in control. This naked girl about 1 year old was sprawled
on the sidewalk. Out of the probably 12-15 people there, the only
ones DOING anything were myself and this man. Everyone else just
gawked. I found out later that it was this man's wife who'd phoned
911 and directed to ambulance, fire truck and police to where
the child lay on the sidewalk. I left as soon as the ambulance
arrived. This incident shocked the heck out of me because my
husband was just sitting on the bed listening. MY HUSBAND. a
caring loving man was just sitting there! I asked him about this
later and he said that the other neighbors had shouted out that
they were calling 911. That the mother hadn't known that cause
she was just too upset to comprehend. But still! People are just
too willing to trust that someone else took responsibility. I
couldn't stand to stay inside and take the chance that I was the
most educated person. That I could help that little girl.
On the other hand, my husband was surprised at my ego. Thinking
that I can help her and no one else can.
I wonder if someone earlier was right. People just feel too
helpless. They don't vote cause it won't matter. Don't help
because who are they to assume that they can. I was raised
a bit strangely. I've always had this egotistical belief
that I can fix everything. (This week, that's getting severly
erroded.) Maybe it's a self-belief thing!
Rachael
|
918.21 | | CGVAX2::CONNELL | CHAOS IS GREAT. | Wed Jul 17 1991 17:11 | 17 |
| I understand E, I'm just glad to see such a reaction to this. I know
you and know that even if you hadn't stated it, you would have done
something. You are to loving and caring a person to not do something.
Now me. As I stated elsewhere in this file, I think the discussion on
what to do about the screaming, I think I would attempt to severely
disable this man. My own consequences be damned. In fact, back in my
gas station employee days of 20 years ago, afellow worker was arrested,
tried and convicted of statutory rape. His own 4 year old daughter and
her 3 year old friend. He served less then a year. He came back looking
to get his old job back. When we were done with him, he left town
walking awfully funny. Never saw him again. These people disgust me to
the point of violence. I know it makes little or no better then thay
are, but women and child beaters and molestors and rapists just set
something off in me.
PJ
|
918.22 | Clarification re: CPR liability | VMSZOO::ECKERT | I said my pajamas and put on my prayers | Wed Jul 17 1991 18:09 | 45 |
| re: .8
>If you have a current certification in CPR, and you do CPR on a person who is
>injured by it or who dies (you can hurt or even kill someone even doing CPR
>correctly, depending on age & physical condition & injuries), the organization
>that certified you will back you in court if you are sued. I believe no one
>in such a position has ever been successfully sued.
>
>That's what the Amer.RedCross &/or HeartAssoc have always told me in CPR
>courses.
I'm an American Heart Association CPR Instructor. At least as far as
the AHA is concerned, the reply quoted above contains a number of
errors. (I've never been involved with ARC CPR and have no knowledge
of their policies, so none of the statements below should be taken to
apply to the ARC.)
An individual who completes an AHA CPR class is not "certified" to
perform CPR - they receive a card stating they have completed a skill
examination at a specified level. I'm not sure if the wording on the
cards has changed recently (I don't have any old ones on hand to
check), but instructors are being told to be very careful to avoid use
of the word "certified" in connection with CPR training.
I've never seen a statement by the AHA (or the ARC, for that matter)
stating they will become involved in an individual's legal defense in
a case arising from the performance of CPR. If subpoenaed they will
produce whatever documentation is required, but that's about it.
Many jurisdictions in the U.S. do have so-called Good Samaritan laws
which are intended to protect individuals who voluntarily provide first
aid or CPR in an emergency situation. The details vary, but these
laws usually apply to people who:
(a) provide aid within and to the scope of their training,
(b) do not commit gross negligence in doing so,
(c) are not obligated to provide such aid,
(d) and receive no compensation for providing such aid.
Contrary to popular belief, these laws (or most of them, anyway) do not
prevent someone from filing a lawsuit against a Good Samaritan - they
only dictate the outcome under the specified conditions.
- Jerry
|
918.23 | a fact | SRATGA::SCARBERRY_CI | | Wed Jul 17 1991 18:18 | 3 |
| When an accident or injury is committed or done, a person has a better
chance of receiving help if only 1-2 persons are witnesses rather
than a group.
|
918.24 | | CSC32::S_HALL | Wollomanakabeesai ! | Wed Jul 17 1991 18:39 | 31 |
|
Hard to make excuses for the folks that watched such an
abomination, but here are a couple:
1) Fear of assault.
"This guy is probably deranged. He may be armed.
He outweighs me by 100 lbs.
I am not legally able to carry a gun in New
York. What can I do ?"
2) Fear of getting involved.
"If I tackle this guy, the police might arrive right
as I wrestle him to the ground, they might think
I'm an accomplice. This crime is so horrible that
I'd be tried and convicted in the press before the
truth came out."
I'm pretty much a "doer". I ran out of my apartment one
night when I heard a woman screaming, really screaming.
I guess I didn't think it through, but if the guy who had been
bugging her had been armed or had decided to stay, I'd have
been in *real* deep ( 130 pounders don't induce a lot of
fear in bullies ).
Several hundred thousand times each year ordinary citizens
stop assaults on others with their privately owned guns. Since
the police can't be everywhere at once, my approach to
things has changed since that night...
Steve H
|
918.25 | | CSC32::K_KINNEY | Take a liking to a Viking | Wed Jul 17 1991 19:02 | 29 |
|
I understand about the dreaded "rats in a box" syndrome.
They were teaching that when I took psychology in undergrad
school many moons ago. I guess they were right. I also never
cease to be amazed at the human capacity for violence and
absolute robotic cruelty to other humans, animals, etc.
I do not consider myself a pacifist and I do not consider
myself at the other side of the spectrum either. I prefer
to believe that before I create any new karma for myself
in this world, I would *think* about it and make it a
conscious act. While I would not initiate a deliberate, unprovoked
attack on a supposedly sentient fellow being, I don't believe
I would hesitate to step into something like this real quick.
I would have a very hard time living with myself if I just
stood by.
I maintain the position that we need to look at ourselves
as a society and see where this kind of stuff comes from. Not
only the attacking but the passive response. I used to think
if we could just get the court system back on track that would
fix it. Now I am not convinced that will do it. The problem is
deeper than that and I think the magnitude has almost reached
the point that there will be no negotiable, reasonable ending
for us as a society. That is sad and frightening. We are supposed
to be possessed of the ability to reason. I think we are losing
that. We need to think of a way to get that back.
kim
|
918.26 | Not required | NECSC::BARBER_MINGO | | Wed Jul 17 1991 19:04 | 34 |
| None of the people who watched were under any legal obligation
to assist the child in any way. As long as they did not invite
or encourage the man to commit the crime, they have committed
no legal wrong. They had no legal responsability. They had
no legal accountability. Since they were not legally responsable
for that child, they could have let him kill her without being
implicated in any way. At worst, I wonder if the mother could
somehow be charged with negligence of some kind, since she IS
responsable.
In the case of Kitty Genovese, I believed that she had been assaulted
more than once on that evening. I had heard that she did not die
the first time, and that her assailant had heard, left, and returned
to finish her. The primary excuse of the individuals for why they
did not do anything were "I thought someone else was calling 911" and
"I did not want to become involved."
My SO was grapling @2:30+ in the morning with this whole series
of scenarios/realities. Apparently, you do not have to help
a drowning child if it is not related to you, or it is not your
pool either.
The problem... The law is only a reflection of morality,
and not morality itself. In the case of group action, they are
still significantly separate issues. I sometimes wonder if seeing
and not acting were illegal, would more people act...Even when
they were at risk with themselves. Maybe if they feared the
law more??? But then... how do we enforce it?
Cindi
I know this may sound cold... but concentrating on the RULES sometimes
obscures the REAL issues enough for me so that I can stomach them.
Otherwise, how could we get out of bed each day and face the world
we live in?
|
918.27 | | CSC32::K_KINNEY | Take a liking to a Viking | Wed Jul 17 1991 20:00 | 11 |
|
re: .26
Do you think that we should legislate that people
should help? We already legislate that people shouldn't
do things to other people that would require other people
to help. That doesn't seem to matter anymore.
kim
|
918.28 | and where is that little girl now? | COGITO::SULLIVAN | Singing for our lives! | Wed Jul 17 1991 20:02 | 13 |
|
For me, the legality of the issue is not what's important -- it's the
rightness or wrongness (main reason why I didn't become a lawyer as
my father wanted me to) -- those people who watched and did nothing
were wrong, as I see it.
What must that little girl have thought/felt? Here was this trusted
adult raping her, and off in the distance a large group of adults
were watching -- could she see them? Did she expect that they would
help her? had she given up before that man finally came to her aid?
Will she ever be able to trust anyone again? Should she?
Justine
|
918.29 | One Step | NECSC::BARBER_MINGO | | Wed Jul 17 1991 20:53 | 52 |
| Re .28
Emotions:
Of what she can remember...
what she will remember...
what does not fall into a self protective void that
she may have to build in herself in order to keep her
sanity... It pains me to guess... and on it I do not
think I am strong enough to speak and keep a firm
grip on the note or much else...
You are far braver than I to be able to try in this forum-
without tears, welling anger,
or for me ferverent prayer. I will, however, where I can
watch you explore that venue... should you choose... and maybe one
day, I will be able to join you... and root out her/our anguish
from its core... but for now it is too much.
As I explained before...I result to the "Rules" because they give
some form to the insanity, and for me, offer structure to the madness/
cruelty that helps stave off depression or utter hopelessness... A lever
through which we my be able to address the situation... without being
swallowed by the Void. It is intended to be a "constructive" separation
of self. I know it is cold. I have had to work to make it that hard.
Re: .27
This I can handle.
From the edges, or the distant fringes, from whence these people
watched, I can only think of one equally distant edge or fringe
that might have touched them where the obvious dire straights
of the little girl did not. Rousseau???(sp?) speaks of actions
done by the "savage" for his fellow man out of empathy. It
has got to be something he can see in his fellow man, and feel
it in himself. A stage of development is supposed to have been
built on that. In the event that the empathetic reaction is not
strong enough to force action, I propose that a different emotion
might breed action. Morality should have done it, but did not.
Only fear was left. Possibly a fear that the punishment for just
watching might be as great or worse for the voyeurs as the
peril they may have perceived in interrupting.
To me, that required a law. Granted, it would be almost impossible
to enforce, everyone could be everyone else's alibi. A chorus of
hear no evils comes to mind with even the simple proposition of
legislation. However, to me, it is a step...a small step... maybe
we could stop one or two of the more obvious ones??? One or two
people afraid enough for their own skins that they would pre-empt
the destruction of hers??? One or two little girls taking one less
step toward the void???
Cindi
|
918.30 | | BTOVT::THIGPEN_S | you meant ME??? | Wed Jul 17 1991 22:17 | 5 |
| .22, vmszoo::eckert
(love that node name!)
thanks for the clarifications; I reported what I remembered but your
info is certainly more current and more likely to be correct!
|
918.31 | I think we are kidding ourselves about how superior we are | TLE::TLE::D_CARROLL | A woman full of fire | Thu Jul 18 1991 00:46 | 23 |
| one...
Everyone who has responded to this note in this file has said they
*would* do something if they saw someone being attacked/raped/beaten...
Are the people in =wn= more daring, more moral or more reactive than
the cross section of the population who watched Kitty Genovese get
killed and a little girl get raped on the highway?
Or are they kidding themselves?
two...
I am against the idea of making a law that requires one to help in the
case of an attack, for many reasons. Main ones are: what, yet another
infringement on our personal civil rights??? and Oh good, that means
it will be even *harder* to get witnesses to come forward against the
perpetrator, since by doing so they will have to admit to their own
crime. and Who gets sued when someone gets the **** beat out of him
trying to help someone else, and he says the only reason he got
involved was to keep himself out of jail?
D!
|
918.32 | smoke? what smoke? | BUSY::KATZ | Georgie Porgie is a Bully | Thu Jul 18 1991 09:05 | 12 |
| a well-known psychology experiment...
scenario 1) put a single person in a room alone and ask hir to fill out
a questionnaire. During the process, let smoke enter the room from
behind a locked door. Most people will investigate and when they
can't open the door, will tell someone "Hey, I think there's a fire."
scenario 2) same as above except with 3 to 4 people. Results?
Apparently, they choose to burn to death. With shared "responsibility"
it seems that inaction is some kind of conditioned norm.
\D/
|
918.33 | | R2ME2::BENNISON | Victor L. Bennison DTN 381-2156 ZK2-3/R56 | Thu Jul 18 1991 10:24 | 39 |
| Some case histories:
On a subway in Chicago, I watched an arm reach into a handbag and pull
out a wallet. I noisily said to the handbag owner, "That man just
took your wallet." There was a lot of confusion and as the train
pulled into a station, I jumped out and raced to the conductor's
window. I told him what was happening. He said "find a policeman"
but then he closed the doors and the train pulled away. I was pissed.
Don't know the outcome.
I was walking with a friend when we heard a woman yelling, "that man
just stole my purse". We took off running after the man and caught
him. The purse was recovered and the police took the man away. Don't
know the outcome.
My wife and I were awakened to screams of "Help, rape!" Looking out
we saw a frantic woman in the opposite vestibule with her blouse torn
off, ringing doorbells. I was throwing on some clothes and my wife
was calling the police when the someone let the woman in and since she
disappeared and seemed safe and since we did not witness anything
except her screaming, we figured it was up to her to call the police
and we went back to bed, though not to sleep well.
I was walking along the lakefront in Chicago with a friend. He was in
a swimming suit. Someone ran up to us (probably thinking my friend was
a lifeguard) and said a woman was drowning. We looked up in time to
see her slip beneath the surface. My friend dived in to get her. He
was a English Channel swimmer, so I stayed on shore to assist on that
end. There was a crowd of 20 or 25 standing around, but nobody else
did a thing, even the woman's boyfriend. My friend pulled her into the
rocks and I hauled her out. She wasn't breathing. My friend started
resuscitation while I ran to a hospital a block away to get help. She
survived.
I guess I've witnessed my share of troubles. I also think I know how
I react in this kind of situation. I also know how a lot of people in
crowds react. You can't count on them.
- Vick
|
918.34 | | CADSE::KHER | Live simply, so others may simply live | Thu Jul 18 1991 10:35 | 7 |
| I know I would be to scared to intervene. But I won't stand there and
watch. I would call the police.
That's what I find so difficult to accept. I can understand that people
were scared and didn't want to get involved themselves. But did noone
call the police or 911?
manisha
|
918.35 | re: 918.31 : It gets easier with practice :-(
| CADSE::FOX | No crime. And lots of fat, happy women | Thu Jul 18 1991 11:29 | 50 |
| D! sez:
> Everyone who has responded to this note in this file has said they
> *would* do something if they saw someone being attacked/raped/beaten...
>
> Are the people in =wn= more daring, more moral or more reactive than
> the cross section of the population who watched Kitty Genovese get
> killed and a little girl get raped on the highway?
>
> Or are they kidding themselves?
D!, if you're deliberately setting up a straw horse, then say so. Otherwise
I think you're being extremely unfair. SEVERAL people gave examples of
WHAT THEY HAVE DONE (not what they "*would*" do). Some of those include
responses of disbelief that something was happening, and initial slowness
of response.
True Story:
One night at 10:30, I was in bed reading when I heard a woman scream
"help me" below my bedroom window. I grabbed the phone to dial 911 and told
my current squeeze to yell out the window that we were calling the police, then
beat it down there, after having shoved myself into a pair of jeans (I wasn't
exactly dressed for the street. By the time I hit the pavement (I live on
the 3rd floor), two patrol cars were there. The woman wasn't. Response
time: about 60 seconds. I stood around talking to the cops for a while. While
I was talking to them, two more calls came through about this _one_ scream.
In all, 7 people had picked up the phone and dialed 911 within 2 minutes of
the _one_ scream. The woman? Some people passing by in a car witnessed
the attack (it was a purse snatch-and-grab, with possible sexual assault)
had already taken her to the nearest hospital.
So D!, there were at least 8 people who were concerned enough to act, and
act quickly, and only one of them is a =wnoter= :-)
I'm lucky, I live in Brookline, where police response is usually that good,
and the cops *never* tell us "you just wasted our time; you shouldn't have
called" -- even when it turns out to be a false alarm (have you ever heard
teenagers shrieking for the heck of it? It makes one's blood run cold).
Which leads to my point ("Finally!" you cry :-). If there is reinforcement for
Doing the Right Thing, most people will. So there needs to be work on
community reinforcement and police response (surprise, surprise!).
I'm no braver than the average bear :-), but I have faced down threatening
people successfully. This leads me to find it easier to do the next time. The
problem is, if when facing down a threatening person, you're more likely to
be piled on by additional threatening people, you're unlikely to act.
Bobbi "when will the deadline for scum pass?" Fox
|
918.36 | people *do* help | DECWET::PCATTOLICO | DoesYourVisionIncludeEveryone? | Thu Jul 18 1991 12:14 | 24 |
|
Hi.
Perhaps this is inappropriate, but I think this topic could
use this. These items appeared in Police Blotter in the
Wednesday, 17 July Seattle Times. Typed in without permission.
Since there's only 3 short items, I'm typing them all:
Issaquah
700 Front Street Soutn - A man was arrested for assault after he
was reportedly seen striking a woman several times with a closed
fist. (July 16)
21 Front Street North - After a man was seen hitting his girlfriend
in public, another man stepped in to stop the fight. (July 14)
140 West Sunset Way - During a neighbor dispute about parking on the
roadway, one of the participants "mooned" the other. (July 14)
***********
So, in 2 out of the 3 items from Issaquah, witnesses *did* something
to help.
Pat
|
918.37 | No words to express the feeling | DENVER::DORO | | Thu Jul 18 1991 12:57 | 6 |
|
Carla -
I empathize. This just makes me sick, at the deepest core of my being.
Jamd
|
918.38 | | AITE::WASKOM | | Thu Jul 18 1991 13:24 | 13 |
| I want to reinforce the "you have to reinforce doing the right thing"
message from a couple back.
A couple of years ago, there was a grass fire on 495 between LKG and
the next exit north. There was a strip of flame that went for about 2
miles, with a pretty good size piece of hillside opposite LKG burning
merrily and a truck there. I pulled off and called 911 to let them
know *how far up the road* there were problems. The dispatcher
basically told me I had wasted his time, as they already knew about it.
I'll think twice before calling in the future, unfortunately.
Alison
|
918.39 | I guess some people are not good during a crisis... | BOOVX1::MANDILE | Lynne - a.k.a. Her Royal Highness | Thu Jul 18 1991 14:39 | 21 |
| I was at Wyman's beach, in Pepperell, for a family outing.
We had stopped off at the main office to ask where our
section was, and were leaving the office when a man and
another man, who was clutching a badly bleeding arm,
came into the office for help. Not one of the three workers
would help, not even to give the guy a bandaid. They just
kept babbling about directions to the hospital. I calmly
asked them if they had a first aid kit. No. Then one remembered
they did have some cloth pressure bandages, and would they do?
Yes, I told them to get them for me, and I made the guy with the
injury sit down, as he had been standing this whole time listening
to this crap going on, and was starting to look a little shocky.
I asked them to call the police to send a cruiser to transport
the man to the hospital. Then I pressure bandaged the man's
arm, and told him not to stand until the police arrived, and
then he said thank you, and my husband & I left.
I saw him later that day with a bandaged arm.
HRH
|
918.40 | I don't like this note I just wrote. | LAGUNA::THOMAS_TA | beautiful beast | Thu Jul 18 1991 14:54 | 22 |
| something that happened on my street to a friend of mine:
A young couple were walking down the street and began to argue,
the man began to hit the woman and the woman screamed for help.
My friend ran to help her, when he got to the couple she stopped
screaming and the man pulled out a gun and held him while the woman
robbed him. According to the police this couple "work" the neighbor-
hood this way... they wait for lone men passers by and when one
is in hearing distance they start their act.
After reading this string of notes and listening to the radio
news yesterday I went home and cried and cried. It all feels so
hopeless...
I don't wanna be a human being anymore. I want to go back to
the reservation and stay there. I want to help that little girl
heal... I want to scream and rage at those people that just
stood there... when I was ... when I was "attacked" I screamed
until they gagged me... as far as I know no one called the police.
with love...
cheyenne
|
918.41 | | R2ME2::BENNISON | Victor L. Bennison DTN 381-2156 ZK2-3/R56 | Thu Jul 18 1991 14:57 | 8 |
| Make the call. Who cares if you get a stupid dispatcher. They don't
pay them much, so don't expect much. I have a ham radio in my car
that I can use to patch into local phone systems to dial 911 or other
emergency numbers. I've called in enumerable fender benders, stalled
vehicles, etc. No one has ever suggested I was wasting their time.
But if they did, it wouldn't deter me from making the calls.
- Vick
|
918.42 | Where is compassion? | RIPPLE::KENNEDY_KA | | Thu Jul 18 1991 15:09 | 5 |
| re .40
Well said cheyenne!
Karen
|
918.43 | Hell is on earth, I think. | GRANPA::TTAYLOR | fortress around my heart | Thu Jul 18 1991 15:56 | 44 |
| In the DC area now there have been so many 911 calls that they are
seriously considering suing people who make calls that aren't valid or
aren't serious enough (beauracracy version of serious) to require
emergency support.
Did anyone watch Primetime live (or one of those shows) last week about
the mother who is hiding her teenaged son because the state won't get
this boy, a violent pedophile (who raped repeatedly his younger brother
and others) an sort of help. All the state did was keep him in a safe
house with no education or any type of psycological help.
Last year, my friend and I were in Salisbury England on holiday. We
stood in the freezing cold by a small river with a strong current. The
river was shallow and there was no ice around the edges. I stood in
disbelief as a young girl, not dressed for the cold, came crying
towards us, bobbing up and down with the current. All the people on
the riverbanks (and there were about 30) froze, with the exception of
myself and my friend. We ran to help. I jumped down the banking and
didn't even care whether I got sick or wet. I was intent on grabbing
this small girl. Luckily, a young man jumped into the water before me
and dragged her out. Where was this girls mother? Sometimes at night,
I still can't sleep thinking about it and wondering what would of
happened if I hadn't been there and the young man hadn't been there.
The mother was no where in sight. We brought the child (about 2 1/2
years old) to the police station. I don't know what happened from
there.
Another instance: in the affluent town I am from, two prominent males
(read: from "good" old families) in town were reprimanded ONLY after
they had been caught molesting young children. One of the men was our
neighbor. He had molested my sister and nearly all the young people
from the neighborhood. I didn't count myself lucky to have escaped.
The other man molested me -- at the age of 7, in full view of at least
100 people. When my mother tried to press charges, she was told,
"don't bother, his family has power and money and it will just be
thrown out in court". She found out he had molested at least 30 young
boys and girls, and had been hospitalized for mental instability.
Sometimes I think hell is actually here on earth. How could God make
us suffer and struggle so much, otherwise. It is difficult for me to
bare my soul here, in a public notesfile, about something so terrible,
but this is just another example of the dark side of human nature.
Tammi
|
918.44 | | R2ME2::BENNISON | Victor L. Bennison DTN 381-2156 ZK2-3/R56 | Thu Jul 18 1991 16:33 | 3 |
| I keep a list of local town police department phone numbers in my
billfold so I can call them instead of 911 for minor fender benders.
- Vick
|
918.45 | 2/3 of those calls made... | RANGER::BENCE | Let them howl. | Thu Jul 18 1991 16:44 | 9 |
| .36
The problem with your 2 out of 3 figure - the sampling you have
is of those incidents where a call was made in the first place.
How many incidents never got to the point of someone notifying the
police?
clb
|
918.46 | Soda and beer commercials have got it right! | TALLIS::TORNELL | | Thu Jul 18 1991 17:14 | 32 |
| Ah, the wonderful world of womanhood. Our pedestals are indeed comfy
and warm as we pass away the hours doing our nails and watching the
Miss America pageant, thinking of nothing more than what to wear on our
next date to look good and make that stranger and all others smile in
approval as we float by. That's the world of women!
This just took me about 5 minutes after reading this and the Kenya
string.
Happily from beau to beau, that is where the beauties go.
Watch your language, cuz women don't know,
The crudeness of the men they tow.
Those sheltered sweets have no idea,
Their pampered brows not knit with fear.
Man says he's born to her, protect,
So harsh reality, shall never infect
Her sensuous world of gentle delight,
Her languid day, her soft, dreamy night.
Men chuckle in private, away from the girls
Who must never know how real life unfurls
And if/when they betray that they've known all the while,
And their faces are drawn, just turn and say "smile"!
Cuz that isn't the life that women here live,
It's not the idea men wanted to give.
They're gentle and loving and forever sweet
As long as they never set foot on the street!
Sandy
|
918.47 | 2/3 calls--small, but positive | DECWET::PCATTOLICO | DoesYourVisionIncludeEveryone? | Thu Jul 18 1991 18:06 | 14 |
| re .45
I wasn't giving an example of incidents that never got
to the point of someone notifying the police, I was trying
to give an example that *at least sometimes people do try
to help*. I was trying to interject a *small* but positive
fact.
How many items were listed in yesterday's NYC papers where someone
helped? maybe that was my point.
Peace from the Great Northwest,
Pat
|
918.48 | Only hindsight has 20/20 vision! | CGHUB::SHIELDS | | Fri Jul 19 1991 11:19 | 24 |
| I'll never forget an incident that happened to me about 10 years ago.
I had just visited my father in the hospital and on my way back to work
took a side road that connected two main arteries of the city. I was
about halfway down the road when suddently in shock and disbelief I
slammed on my brakes to avoid hitting a BABY LYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
STREET!!!!! I got out of the car and a small toddler of about 3 years
old came to retrieve her baby brother/sister. I assited her, put them
safely in their yard, latched the fence and went to the nearest phone
to notify the police.
Their response was "we know the address, we'll go see what we can do
this time"! I made a point of driving down that street for a full week
to see if this was a common occurrence. I had dreams for quite awhile
about all that 'could' have happened to that poor child.
Why didn't I go to the door? The children were so dirty and badly
clothed that I was left with the impression that the 3 year old was
probably held 'responsible' for the baby. I was truly afraid of what would
probably happen to her if her faux pas was revealed.
What a world we live in, hugh?
|
918.49 | After the crisis, then I can be sick. | BENONI::JIMC | illegitimi non insectus | Tue Aug 06 1991 16:12 | 15 |
| Ish!
I was an EMT years ago. I can tell you a lot more about people who did
not care or get involved than about people who did. MY personal policy
is, if an official response team is there (police, EMT, fire Dept, etc)
just keep going, if not, stop and render assistance while sending
someone else for help. If it is not possible to stop and/or render
assistance, go quickly and call for help.
Most people, in my experience, just watch. I do not know why, some of
the earlier replies may have the answers. All I know is that I can't
just stand by.
At least the tow truck driver did something. That is important.
jimc
|
918.50 | | VMSMKT::KENAH | The man with a child in his eyes... | Tue Aug 06 1991 17:47 | 23 |
| Does anyone have the details of the retraction of this story?
I only heard snippets of it on the news, but apparently the original
story about people standing around doing nothing simply wasn't true.
This is my understanding of what happened:
Yes, there were people, and yes, they were standing around, but only
because the first people who actually SAW something stopped immediately
and blocked traffic. Except for the people in front, who saw what was
happening (and, according to the later story) tried to stop it, the
other drivers had no idea what was really going on.
If you go back and read the base note, some of the flaws of the story
begin to show: why, for example, would twenty people stop driving on
the FDR (a major road) at 5:15 in the afternoon to watch a felony?
Simple -- that's not why they stopped.
I realize this is futile -- the retraction will never catch the
slander.
andrew
|
918.51 | Motorists probably couldn't see the rape | THEBAY::COLBIN::EVANS | One-wheel drivin' | Tue Aug 06 1991 21:12 | 13 |
| What I heard on NPR was that traffic backed up on the road at about the
same time the 2 (I think) people who saw the rapist stopped. The guy
who was intervewed said he and another guy got down by the woods (or
field, or whatever) in time to see the rapist pulling up his pants.
He also said the only reason people were stopped was that traffic was
heavy and he doubted that the people in their cars could've seen the
incident from their perspective, even if they had been looking.
I heard this over a month ago, so I'm fuzzy on the details...
--DE
|