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| Title: | Topics of Interest to Women |
| Notice: | V3 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open. |
| Moderator: | REGENT::BROOMHEAD |
|
| Created: | Thu Jan 30 1986 |
| Last Modified: | Fri Jun 30 1995 |
| Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
| Number of topics: | 1078 |
| Total number of notes: | 52352 |
590.0. "What our loves and hates reveal" by SA1794::CHARBONND (Fred was right - YABBADABBADOOO!) Thu Dec 20 1990 16:36
The recent string in the 'I hate...' note got me thinking how
we reveal _ourselves_ in our loves and hates. You can form
a strong, though incomplete, picture of someone, just by knowing
their loves. Or their hates. To see the whole person you need both.
You would get one picture of me if I said, "I hate disco, the
Simpsons, spoiled brats, sleet, Volkswagons, hot dogs and mosquitos."
You'd get a very different picture if I said, "I love rock&roll,
4x4 pickup trucks, Star Trek, karate, jazz, chili, hunting, and
good beer."
To even begin to see _me_ you need both pictures. If I want to
be seen I need to show you both pictures. And if I want to
'hide in plain sight' I can give you just parts of the picture(s),
omitting important details. Conversely, I can avoid seeing _you_
by refusing to see parts of the picture(s). Or render you
invisible by making you reluctant to express yourself.
I think what I'm trying to get at is, if we are to see each
other, we cannot hide, or tell others to hide, or shut our eyes.
We may not _like_ what we see, but acknowledgement of our
differences must surely be an improvement on blind hatred.
| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 590.1 | And not all the time | XCUSME::QUAYLE | i.e. Ann | Thu Dec 20 1990 18:02 | 4 |
| By and large, I prefer adults.
aq
|
| 590.3 | | XCUSME::QUAYLE | i.e. Ann | Fri Dec 21 1990 12:27 | 4 |
| Out of fellow-feeling, perhaps.
aq
|
| 590.4 | ramblings | BTOVT::THIGPEN_S | freedom: not a gift, but a choice | Fri Dec 21 1990 12:55 | 17 |
| .0, good note; people sure are complicated. Given how much we protect
ourselves, and how much we make ourselves vulnerable, it's probably
amazing that we get along as well as we do.
Some things our loves and hates reveal: the values and prejudices with
which we were raised. Values we admire and aspire to. Conclusions based
on reason. Blind spots. Traits, good or bad, we have decided to leave as
they are. Weaknesses, strengths. What we need, what we're willing to
give. What makes us angry, what makes us glad.
And also: how we feel about the various roles we assume, or have thrust
upon us. How much of the 'self' is projected there, how much is
witheld as a matter of privacy or reservation or committment. How we
seperate those roles, and project a persona 'appropriate' to the role.
How much we make use of protective coloration.
Sara
|