| Title: | ARCHIVE-- Topics of Interest to Women, Volume 2 --ARCHIVE | 
| Notice: | V2 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open. | 
| Moderator: | REGENT::BROOMHEAD | 
| Created: | Thu Jan 30 1986 | 
| Last Modified: | Fri Jun 30 1995 | 
| Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 | 
| Number of topics: | 1105 | 
| Total number of notes: | 36379 | 
    I'm posting this note for a member of this community who wishes
    to remain anonymous right now. I will forward mail replies; please
    specify whether you, too, wish to remain anonymous (otherwise I'll
    assume it's ok to leave your name on the message I forward).
    
    Liz, who is no longer a moderator.
    
    ---------------------------------------------- 
    
    I am currently thinking to the future and considering what I should do
    when we start having children. 
    
    I have no intention on returning to Digital after I have a baby, but am
    concerned about also planning for any catastrophes. (ie. my husband
    dies or becomes able to work, baby dies at birth,...etc) My question is
    this : What do I tell my manager? 
    
     -That I am only coming back if I absolutly have to.
     -I am definately coming back and then after the baby is born, tell
      him/her that I will not be returning.
    
    Your opinions on this matter would be very welcome.
    
    Thanks,
    Mother-to-be-(someday)
    
    
| T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines | 
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 718.1 | SA1794::CHARBONND | I'm the NRA | Fri Jul 28 1989 10:54 | 13 | |
|     Option one. Honesty is usually the best policy. Start the
    conversation by emphasizing the positive things about your work
    experience, the learning, people, etc. Then explain that you
    feel you would like to be a full time mother. Explain that
    you don't believe you want to combine work and family.
    And make sure he understands that you want to keep the door
    open in case circumstances change.
    
    Be sure, leaving on a lie will slam that door and bar it. Not
    to mention, if you seek work elsewhere at a later date, a good
    recommendation from your former manager will help.
    
    Dana
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| 718.2 | VLNVAX::OSTIGUY | Fri Jul 28 1989 11:07 | 15 | ||
|     I disagree with .1
    
    You are not obilgated to tell your manager anything about your plans
    about you returning the work after the baby.  No manager should ask
    you either.  It's none of their business.  You don't have to decide
    whether you'll be back to work before your baby is born, you should
    decide that after you've had your baby; which is when you'll really
    know if you will or if you won't.  And no manager should hold this
    against you.  
    
    You should talk with your benefits specialist.  She/He will tell you
    your rights.  
    
    Anna
    
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| 718.3 | SONATA::ERVIN | Roots & Wings... | Fri Jul 28 1989 11:20 | 16 | |
|     From what I have seen around the halls of the personnel department,
    most women do not make a decision regarding returning to work after a
    STD maternity leave until they are already on leave.  In other words,
    approximately 3 to 4  weeks before you are scheduled to return from STD
    is a good time to inform your manager of your decision to not return
    and that you are instead, resigning your position.
    
    If your manager asks you if you are planning to return to work before
    you go out on STD, a reasonable response would be, "I am not planning
    to make that decision until after my baby is born."  
    
    Regards,
    
    Laura (who works in personnel but does application systems for
    personnel)
    
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| 718.4 | Pointers | LEZAH::BOBBITT | invictus maneo | Fri Jul 28 1989 11:39 | 10 | 
|     There may well be relevant information found at:
    
    Womannotes-v2 (this file) 
    364 - Pregnancy And Digital
    
    Parenting
    690 - When should you tell your manager you are pregnant
    
    -Jody
    
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