[Search for users] [Overall Top Noters] [List of all Conferences] [Download this site]

Conference turris::womannotes-v2

Title:ARCHIVE-- Topics of Interest to Women, Volume 2 --ARCHIVE
Notice:V2 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open.
Moderator:REGENT::BROOMHEAD
Created:Thu Jan 30 1986
Last Modified:Fri Jun 30 1995
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1105
Total number of notes:36379

519.0. "What is *your* note worth?" by AQUA::WAGMAN (QQSV) Fri Mar 24 1989 15:58

This note is inspired by Eileen Dunne's remarks in note 437.104, in part:

>    Has anyone else noticed that this notes' file has many more apologetic
>    remarks like "This is just my two cents' worth."?  I think I've
>    seen this kind of remark a little more often here than in other notes'
>    files. In a sense it's refreshing,... but I wonder if it also [reflects]
>    a desire not to make waves on the part of women.

I've thought about this a number of times.  Often I have read notes which I
felt made a valuable contribution to some topic, and have found a comment
like "Just my .02 worth" or "My opinion *only*" (emphasis mine) tacked on
to the end.

I think that this notesfile and the notes in it are worth a great deal more
than two cents.  A self deprecating comment such those above can detract
from the strength of what has been written elsewhere in the note and may also
serve to give up power over a situation.  Much of what this notesfile is about
concerns women's attempts to take control over their lives and work situa-
tions; I think it may be very tough to control these if you can't acknowledge
the value of your own opinions.

People, you are all worth a great deal more than two cents!  I call on you
not to devalue yourselves or your opinions with such stuff.  There is no
shame in holding strong opinions or making waves; be proud to take credit
for your full value.  I want to congratulate Eileen for being the first one
to accurately value one of her own notes, again from 437.104:

>                       My two gold bricks' worth :-)

Brava!

						--Q (Dick Wagman)
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
519.1ULTRA::ZURKOWords like winter snowflakesFri Mar 24 1989 16:537
Thank you Dick (or do you prefer Q?).

I often feel the need to give others space and respect as well. However, it is
awfully easy to do that by diminishing myself. Certain people have the knack of
allowing space and respect for others while still giving full weight and value
to their own opinions. And I try to learn that from them here.
	Mez
519.2CALLME::MR_TOPAZFri Mar 24 1989 17:008
       I think that the annual value of each person's noting output in
       this conference is exactly $150.00.
       
       So, to determine the value of any note written by a particular
       noter, it's a simple matter of dividing $150 by the total number
       of notes contributed by that noter over the course of a year.
       
       --Mr Topaz 
519.5Just my .0000001 ??2EASY::PIKETI hate seeing <No more new notes>Fri Mar 24 1989 17:405
    
    I'm not sure I like your algorithm!!!
    
    Roberta
    
519.7speaking only for myself :-)SUPER::HENDRICKSThe only way out is throughSun Mar 26 1989 11:5312
    I think the attempt is to avoid generalizing, which tends to make
    people angry and start fights.
    
    I don't particularly like the connotation of "just my opinion",
    but I do like it when someone reiterates that "I am speaking for
    myself".  
    
    I sometimes make that the note title when I need to say something
    controversial, and don't want to deal with a flurry of reactive
    mail messages...it does make a difference.
    
    Holly
519.8FWIW...ELESYS::JASNIEWSKIjust a revolutionary with a pseudonymMon Mar 27 1989 08:5128
                                         
    	When we become excited over a particular topic, it's very easy
    to "slight" the context of how are saying something. The greatest
    contextual offense is to slight "perhaps", "maybe", "possibly" or
    "could" as *is*; slighting the indefinate as something definate.
    
    	"This is this and that is that, and you are all whatever" IMHO.
    
    	Rather than go back and recontext every statement to read in
    a sensable manner, it's much easier to just tack on a disclaimer
    at the end! My guess is that if people really put some quality time
    into their replys, there would be no need for "disclaimers", as
    anything arguable would be well thought out and contexted in a way 
    that there would only be one possible interpretation.
    
    	I have removed a reply more than once here, simply cause I didnt
    like the way it read, to work on it more before re-submitting. One
    thing I like to avoid is the possibility of misinterpretation. Another
    is claiming definates, which I do habitually and when I get "excited"
    in making a response.
    
    	Personally, I do not like the idea of "my 2 cents worth", even
    as a cliche'. It's a subtle devaluation of the self, and while one
    might think; "Aww, it's just a cliche' - somethin' ya say!" it may
    have a negative consequential impact on one's sense of self. Or,
    conversely, it may reveal what's trully there.
    
    	Joe Jas 
519.10APEHUB::STHILAIREyou heard meMon Mar 27 1989 11:498
    re .2, if that means you're willing to write me a check for $450.
    for the past 3 yrs. of my notes, I'll take it!
    
    Lorna
    
    P.S.  Just my humble, worthless, pitiful response to your ever so
    witty one.
    
519.13Sharing Myself...SLOVAX::HASLAMCreativity UnlimitedMon Mar 27 1989 13:0415
    My notes are valuable to me, as a tool of communication and sharing
    and for support when needed.  I believe it is up to the person reading
    the note to place a "value" on it.  I have been fortunate in the
    past in that I have received many kind responses from others in
    this file telling me that my replies have been of help in their
    lives.  In one recent case, an abused noter found the encouragement
    and support needed to get out of the situation she was in.  What
    value then, could I attach to electronic support?  Because of a
    few words packed with a lot of feeling that I was able to send to
    someone in need, there is one less abused woman in the world.  To
    me, this is beyond price; therefore, I have no humble opinions or
    otherwise.  I am sharing "me" across these lines.  It is the best
    I can do and I feel good about it.
    
    Barb
519.14Thumbs Up, Barb!AQUA::WALKERMon Mar 27 1989 15:042
    The compassionate support I have seen within Womannotes is worth
    far more than can be measured in dollars.
519.15My 2 cents USEM::DONOVANMon Mar 27 1989 15:2513
    This is an interesting string. People obviously note for different
    reasons.
    		* To help people
    		* A call to action
    		* To eliminate boredom
    		* To communicate 
    		* To teach
    		* To learn
                     
    Did I miss anything?
    
    Kate
    
519.17WMOIS::B_REINKEIf you are a dreamer, come in..Mon Mar 27 1989 15:358
    Kate,
    
    try    * To make friends
           * To get into fights
    
    I've seen both
    
    Bonnie
519.18HANDY::MALLETTBarking Spider IndustriesMon Mar 27 1989 17:378
    I was going to throw in my "two gold bricks" worth, but as I began
    to write this I got a call from my broker.  So now I'll have to say
    that my 1.7816 gold bricks worth is that, while I'm not crazy about
    the particular disclaimer "2� worth", I'm real partial to the care
    given to the way in which opinion is usually expressed in this 
    conference.
    
    Steve
519.19in re careful opinionsWMOIS::B_REINKEIf you are a dreamer, come in..Mon Mar 27 1989 17:5913
    in re .18
    
    Steve,
    
    I appreciated your comment about 'the care given to the way in which
    opinion in usually expessed in this conference.' Over the past two
    years that I have been a moderator that has been an issue that has
    been revisited many times. In so far as people look at womannotes
    as a place where people take care with what they say to others and
    where others will take care in what they say to them, then I have
    a real sense of warm appreciation in the people who contribute here.
    
    Bonnie
519.20Friendly Place to ChatUSEM::DONOVANTue Mar 28 1989 11:577
    I have to agree with you, Bonnie. (as I usually do) But I have been
    people get blasted in here too. But usually it is either a
    misunderstanding or the person deserved it. Some people find this
    "almost invisible medium" a great place to say things that they
    wouldn't dare say in person.
                  
    Kate