T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
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398.1 | It's a lot of being "in tune" as they used to say. | DPD01::CRAVEN | any forward gear will do... | Sun Jan 15 1989 22:05 | 15 |
| Well, I tend to follow the school of "you just KNOW" when it comes
to love...(what else can you do?)...but if it helps...
he recognizes when I've "gone off the deep end" so to speak
and he does something silly/crazy to get me "sane" again.
he listens to me - really LISTENS to what I'm saying and shares
his beliefs with me. And I know he appreciates me for being smart
and independent and trying to get it together.....
he shares something very private....
and he SAYS those 3 little words.....
(and suggesting a nite at a marvelous hotel suite, well....)
|
398.2 | It's the little things that count..... | PHAROS::RYAN | Some days you eat the bear | Mon Jan 16 1989 12:44 | 5 |
| I know that Mike really loves me because he always lets me have the
last sip of coke on hot summer days at Fenway. This doesn't sound
like much, but it's the little things that count.
Dee
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398.4 | Some of My Thoughts | STEREO::VINDICI | It's the Journey, Not the Destination | Mon Jan 16 1989 14:44 | 17 |
| Everyone is different in how they can give/show love, but in
my present relationship, I get the message that I'm loved first
by the showing of AFFECTION (either in public or private), like
hand holding or rubbing of my back, etc. Other things that get
the message across are sincere compliments, *that look* in his
eyes, a phone call just to say "I love you", or a card of flowers
for no special reason.
I guess the main way you get the message is that he treats you
with courtesy and respect and really listens when you have something
to say. It all gives you the feeling that you are *the* special
person in his life and he treasures your relationship enough to
want to keep it special.
Helaine
P.S. ...and don't forget Valentine's Day is coming up!!
|
398.5 | Be will to give and you might receive! | NBC::MORIN | life gets better and better | Mon Jan 16 1989 15:47 | 36 |
| I can't let this one pass. It is really important.
One has to be willing to give in order to receive. If one wants
to be treated with respect than one must treat with respect. If
one wants to be treated in a loving way than one must be willing
to treat their loved one in a loving way.
I know the man in my life loves me. He shows me and tells me.
The following are just a few of the ways that he shows me. ( By the
way, I think he is the greatest! He is the most exciting man I
have ever know. The kindest, gentlest, honest and most loving.
I am so glad he is in my life. Can you tell I love him?)
:-)
With his gentle touch.
The way he smiles at me for no apparent reason.
The way we have fun together doing everything. even cooking & cleaning.
The respect he shows me.
His honesty.
The way he is open with me, showing his trust of me.
The many gifts of himself he gives me.
He tells me often that he loves me. I never tire of hearing it.
His consideration, always.
His friendship.
I only hope I can be as good to him as he is to me. I try, for he
is worth it.
If this is mawkish, I don't care. I have waited a long time for
him. I deserve him and he deserves my love too. :-)
A lucky woman!
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398.6 | | ULTRA::G_REILLY | | Mon Jan 16 1989 19:34 | 26 |
|
Upon being asked 'How do I know if it's real love?' my Mom replied
to me "If you have to ask, it isn't." (This is one of the few things
my mother ever told that has proven to be correct.) In the first
marriage I had to ask and it was all very intellectual and it ended.
[ Hint - if the man you are going to marry will not say he loves
you because 'I can't define what love is,' the battle is probably
lost before it begins.]
In my current marriage (the absolutely most wonderful relationship
ever - but then what would you expect from twin-flame soul-mates,
but I digress,) he shows me that he loves me by:
signing all mail between us with our secret names and saying he
loves me (and likewise I to him.)
really caring about me, taking care of me when I'm sick (which was
a lot last year.)
noticing when something is wrong with me
the fact that spending time together is the norm rather than the
exception.
alison
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398.7 | My Special Man | SLOVAX::HASLAM | Creativity Unlimited | Tue Jan 17 1989 11:43 | 22 |
| He is *aware* of me and knows when I've got a problem I'm trying
not to show.
He loves to spend time with me for no reason. "I just want to be
with you!"
He is attentive when I speak, and listens well. He keeps a confidence
and supports me when I need TLC.
He doesn't criticize me for my boldness or being a very vocal woman.
He admits his mistakes in our relationship and really tries to make
it better.
He will fix dinner for the children because he knows I'm tired when
I get home, and I never even asked.
When we make love, he makes me feel as if I am the only woman God
had in mind when women were created. It always makes me feel
beautiful and magnificent.
Barb
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398.8 | My Guy | BPOV06::MACKINNON | | Tue Jan 17 1989 15:52 | 15 |
|
He brings me peanut M&M's when I'm down.(they always put a smile
on my face)
He brings me carnations on Sunday mornings.
The look in his eyes when he watches his daughter and myself interact
with each other. That is really special.
When he lets us watch Designing Women instead of a Celtics Basketball
game.
Just the fact that he cares.
Michele
|
398.9 | So many ways I couldn't list them all... | CSMADM::COOK | YOWZA!!! | Thu Jan 19 1989 11:52 | 17 |
|
He communicates... he's a good friend, who I can always rely on.
He's always there with outstretched arms when he can tell I've had
a bad day. He'll turn over to snuggle with me for that last 10 minutes
we have in bed before work... he'll make me dinner on a night I
have to work late.. He'll share with me some really private, intimate
thoughts that he would share with no one else... He lets me into
his life, spend time with his family.. He'll surprise me by saying,
on a spur of the moment, that he couldn't stop thinking about me
all day. . . He'll tell me when he dreams about me... He'll tell
me, in so many ways, that he loves me... without necessarily saying
it.. he'll give me a certain look, his eyes glassed over, a smile
that he saves for only me... a certain pressure when he holds my
hand..
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398.12 | | CIVIC::JOHNSTON | OK, _why_ is it illegal? | Thu Jan 19 1989 14:03 | 16 |
| I _know_ Rick loves me because he didn't bat an eyelash when I hauled
my sleeping bag out and slept in my new car the night I brought it
home. [Monday, this was] He brought me hot coffee and half a bagel
the next morning.
I don't need to hear 'I love you' -- well, maybe I do...I just never
have because he tells me frequently, although not so much as you'd
really notice, if you know what I mean.
He never tries to bask in my reflected glory, allowing me the chance
to crow when I really feel I've _done_ something. He's proud of my
accomplishments in a way that claims no credit for himself.
"My <husband>...I think I'll keep <him>"
Ann
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398.13 | "Where is this Wonderful Man?" | WMOIS::M_LEE | Atlanta here I come | Fri Jan 20 1989 13:12 | 17 |
|
Where on earth, would those of us who are single find such a wonderful
man, one you've all spoke of??? I'm starting to lose faith in finding
such a man!
Please guys, I don't mean to offend anyone. I've ended a relationship
with someone I thought was a caring individual, but to my surprise,
he turned out to be a very self-centered man. "I want a relationship,
but what do I HAVE to give up?" Maybe I'm just a little bitter?
Nah... (smile)
Do you know how much nicer, how great it would be to do those special
things for each other? Good things come to those who wait...right?
Maria
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398.14 | The Little Things | AWARD2::HARMON | | Fri Jan 20 1989 13:50 | 9 |
| It's the little things that really count to me. You know, the certain
look he only has for you, the "just for nothing" gifts, a pet name
he gives you (not to tease you but to show endearment). And he's
playful and has a sense of humor about his faults and yours. He's
there for you when you need him and knows when you need your own
space..... And I would do all of the same things for him.
P.
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398.15 | | CSC32::WOLBACH | | Fri Jan 20 1989 13:51 | 21 |
|
No, people draw into their lives what they want, and what they
need. Unfortunatley, what we 'need' is not always what we 'want'
and so we often find ourselves in uncomfortable situations.
But if you really want a relationship with a particular type of
man, then don't just wait passively. Get very clear on what you
really want in a relationship, and very clear on what type of man
would be your 'ideal'. Focus on these clear ideals. Meditate on
your goal(s) each night as you go to sleep. As your guides, God,
your higher power, whatever term you use to describe those invisible
helpers that we all have, for guidance and assistance. THEN you
can sit back and wait to reap the fruits of your labors. Remember,
God helps those who help themselves.
Worked for me.
Deborah
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398.16 | | WMOIS::M_LEE | Atlanta here I come | Fri Jan 20 1989 15:48 | 51 |
|
Re: 13
Maybe I should clarify...
"Good things come to those who wait"? I hope I didn't give the
impression that I should sit home and wait for "prince charming", to
come knocking on my door. I know I "will" one day meet that special person.
Just right now it hurts... In time that will ease as well as the
bitterness.
I do depend on God, but not as much as I should. Sometimes I lose
sight that things happen for a reason. And I just don't understand
those reasons until a later date.
Now...about this note!
I look for someone (Gee..I feel like I'm in the Singles file) who's
very gentle, in his words, in his voice, and his touch.
He's understanding to my "crazy" moods, and I to his.
He's honest with me, even though sometimes I know it's difficult
for him to do, because he doesn't want to hurt my feelings.
I enjoy playing outside, at the beach, in the rain, and he doesn't
mind at all, in fact he's right there beside me, having just as
much fun.
He hugs me so tight, that I feel at times I'm going to BURST! Almost
like a little kid? One a day!
He doesn't leave, when I need him most.
He makes it perfectly clear, that our relationship is the number
one priority. Everything else comes second...
He tells me he loves me, and calls on the phone "out of the blue",
just to remind me.
He trust me completely and I him. That's another way of saying,
"I love you".
He quietly leaves in the morning for work before I wake, and I find a
love letter in my car, or on the kitchen table.
He sings (very off key), love songs on the radio to me , and I love
every last one of them.
He "calmly" explains the rules of football and basketball, so
I understand, these very confusing games which he enjoys so much.
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398.17 | some folks are just like you expected, others... | WAYLAY::GORDON | The shimmer of distance... | Fri Jan 20 1989 16:19 | 12 |
| Re: .13,.16
Well, you could always come to the =wn= party. Then you get
to meet men who read this conference, and perhaps you even have
some background on the way they think from the kind of things thy
write.
[Disclaimer: I attend to meet people, not only women. On the
other hand, I wouldn't complain if I did happen to meet someone
special at any Noter's party... ;-) ]
--Doug
|
398.18 | Love _IS_ lovelier ... | BARTLE::GODIN | | Fri Jan 20 1989 16:32 | 26 |
| Can't speak for others, but for me:
1. He treats me like an equal in all the fun and wonderful ways,
but not when it comes to taking out the garbage or shoveling the
driveway.
2. He says he loves me, with his eyes and his actions more than
with his words.
3. He goes grocery shopping with me, not because he feels he must
or because society expects it, or even because he thinks I want
him to, but because he _wants_ to be with me.
4. He does "loving" things, like sending flowers and back rubs,
BUT
All of the above would mean nothing if he didn't
5. Accept me the way I am, overweight, gray hair, aggressive and
sullen at times (just to name a few of my faults), without trying
to change me or nudge me or sweet-talk me into doing things just
a bit different so I'd be more like his "perfect" woman.
Thanks, Ron!
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398.19 | LOVE IS... | SLOVAX::HAGUE | | Tue Jan 24 1989 18:54 | 12 |
| I have to agree with ALL that has been said so far.
The only thing I can add is that love is the unconditional surrender
of feelings: happiness, sorrow, joy, anger, fear, pain. Sharing
it with the one you love does make you vulnerable, but the rewards
are great when the feeling is returned. It is something that only
two people in love understand. The love that Les and I have for each
other is not always perfect, but what would we have to work at if
it were. Getting there is half the fun anyway.
Louise
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