Conference turris::womannotes-v2

    A memorable gift that I received was a stuffed animal from "Santa"
    when I was five- Winnie the Pooh.  To this day, I still have it
    sitting on my bed (in some ways it has become my "Velveteen Rabbit").

    

From the man who thinks all 'ism's are radical,
That a feminist can't be a male,
and whose first exposure to a feminist was like most of ours: the media
portrayal of a castrating bitch:

A book of feminist literary criticism.
I cried.

	Mez

    When they were in their teens, my mother and her 2 sisters
    used to sing acapella 3 part harmonies together.  Through-
    out my childhood they have sung (with much arm twisting)
    at various family occasions.  My mother even wrote music
    to a family toast which has become traditional at every
    birthday or wedding party.  Last year the three of them
    got together, rented a recording studio and recorded a
    Van Fleet Sister's Greatest Hits tape and made copies
    for all of their children.  After my daughter and my cats -
    this is the one thing I would want to save in a disaster
    situation.
    
    Nanci

    
    The most memorable gift of my childhood was a "two-gun holster".
    I came out on Christmas morning, and there under the tree from
    Santa was a Tiny Tears Doll.  My tears were not tiny!  My mother
    quickly intervened, and I unwrapped the only thing I wanted --
    a holster with twin silver guns.  Heaven.  Ever since that, I love 
    and trust my mother more than Santa!

    Sharon

    
    
    My most memorable gift was a Tonka Truck that my father went out
    and bought for me.  I still have it and treasure it to this day.
    I guess I enjoyed that more then any of the dolls I ever received.
    
    Marcia

	 My most memoriable gift....hum.... well, all I can think
	 about is the gold chain that my ex-boyfriend bought me...him
	 and I were both so poor in college ... I swear he had to have
	 gone without eating for a month or so to get that for me...it
	 is a small, cheap gold chain, but the fact that he was
	 willing to sacrifice a lot to get it for me, really meant
	 a lot to me....

	 

    Several Christmas' ago, my mother organized the boxes of loose pictures
    in the garage, and made a huge chronological album of me - for me.

    The first picture was of the day I was born, and the last pictures
    were of recent times.  She made it extra special by cutting out
    little pictures and things from magazines and including them among
    the pictures.  She also wrote on the backs of all of them telling
    me how old I was, where the picture was taken, and the names of
    any other people in the picture.  She called the album, "The Life and 
    Times of Colleen, Part I".  

    She then gave me an empty "Part II" album so I can pick up where she 
    left off.  She made one for my sister, too.
    
    The time and effort she took making these albums meant almost as
    much as the albums themselves.
    
    Colleen

    My most memorable gift....actually there are two.
    
    When I was 3 years old my parents gave me a rocking horse.  It was
    under my stocking.....It was red with a black painted face, reins
    saddle and tail.  My mother tells the story that she could not get
    me off the rocking horse...I ate my breakfast and lunch on it and
    I even took my nap on it!!  I still have it and it is still in very
    good condition.
    
    The other was a Christmas present from my brother.  When I started
    to open it, he took his camera and got set to see my reaction. 
    What I had received was a Lladro figurene of a "big" brother and
    "little" sister in their night clothes.  The brother had his arm
    protectively around his sister as they held a candle to light the
    way to wherever.....My sister-in-law told me that once David had
    seen that, all he said was "that's for Pattie".....it is probably
    my most treasured treasure.
    
    P.
    

    I wonder how different my life would have been if my folks
    hadn't given me that beat up, junky Kay acoustic guitar with
    five rust-covered strings. . .
    
    Steve
    
    P.S.  Come to think of it, probably not much - sooner or later
    	  I would have gotten the guitar.  So strong was my music
    	  addiction that in order to get my first decent electric,
    	  I actually went out and got a job.  

    Most memorable wedding gift:
    
    	A hand made quilt, 4 years in the making by one of Arlene's
    oldest friends. 

    Most memorable gift given -
    
    One Thanksgiving, my aunt said to the assembled gathering, "Before
    I die, I'd like to go up in a balloon!" Now since the woman was
    very hard to buy for - at 83, you've about received everything
    that exists (that you want), I took this as a "message from fate".
    
    For Xmas, that year, I gave her a certificate for the balloon ride.
    Her cousins came from Pennsylvania, and some friends went along,
    too, and we followed the balloon in our cars. Afterward, the pilot
    took her to breakfast at the Lord Jeffrey Inn in Amherst - the rest
    of us went along and had breakfast,too.
    
    The pictures are great - there's something about an 83 year old
    woman in a crash helmet!
    
    --DE
    

    My most memorable gifts have been from two of my daughters, and
    they weren't given on a holiday...
    
    During my welfare days, I was struggling to raise my remaining 5
    kids, pay the bills, and go to school.  One time we had no money
    for bread and milk, so my 10 year old went out and got a babysitting
    job without telling me, the came home and proudly insisted the I
    let her help.  "Here you go, Mom, I know you need it for food!"
    It made me cry.  Now, as single parenthood agains looks as if it's
    going to descend (Michael detests two of my children so is leaving.),
    I was concerned about how I was going to juggle his half of the
    rent payment.  My 8 year old came in last Sunday night and was excited
    and giggling as she handed me all the money she had earned over
    the weekend to help pay the rent.  In my hand lay $1.90 to help
    me so I wouldn't worry.
    
    These were the best gifts of all!
    
    Barb

    From my brother, who never remembers any occasion (or anything else),
    ... a silver necklace, for no occasion.  He remembered that I love silver!
    
    My first valentine gift from my now-husband:  a .22 semi-auto Remington
    rifle with nylon stock and scope (I LOOOOOVE rifles!!!! and my parents
    never even let me have a toy gun; not ladylike.)  This is the 1st
    valentine I had ever received, ever!
    
    X'mas gift from my hub:  a necklace:  Antique-gold chain, crystal
    disc with an antique-gold flowered vine, and a silver unicorn laying
    down with the vine around it.  
    
    Birthday:  This year, the group I work with gave me a cake.  This
    is the 1st time my birthday had ever been recognised outside of
    the house!
    
    Most memorable gifts I had ever given:  my hub's 1st ever teddy
    bear (1984); to my mom - a fake book on a stand, open to the Serenity
    Prayer and a beautiful picture of Jesus; to my "baby" brother -
    a night out, just him and me, to see "Back To The Future" and Burger
    King for his 13th birthday; to my dad - a surprise 50th birthday
    party (and one for my mom just a few years later).
    
    K.C.

	Years back my sister was an instructor for Gloria Stevens.  If any
worker earned enough brownie points(i.e. brought in so many $$), they went 
to the company meeting, usually at some exotic locale.  Well one year she
earned a week in the Bahamas all expenses paid.  Since the plane took off
the day she was scheduled to give birth to her daughter......  guess what
I got for my birthday.     I will treasure the memory forever.   (plus
the fact that she picked _me_)     Sisters are a treasure!

			kbear    (i have five)


ps.  I was a _very_ poor college student at the time.

    
    	The most memorable gift I ever gave was to my best friend. 
    Both of us considered ourselves rather "geek"-like in HS although
    both of us were smart and played varsity sports and the like.  She
    hated her b-day because it was in the summer and although she always
    participated in the surprise parties for the girls in her "group"
    no one ever remembered hers.  So on the 19 days preceding her birthday
    I sent her a card for each year of her life....they started out
    with baby cards and all the little numerical cards that you can
    get for 5 and 6 year olds....and I worked my way up to sweet 16
    and all the rest.  For the present, I sent a shoebox with lots of
    individually wrapped gifts with explicit instructions about what
    to open first and what to open second etc.....included were 4 matchbox
    cars because when I had asked her what she wanted for her birthday
    she had told me to buy her a car (she was being difficult because
    she didn't want anything because she didn't like birthdays)  The
    final gift that she opened was a gold clattaugh ring....for those
    of you who've never heard of them, they're Irish rings with a crown
    under a heart being held by 2 hands and they symbolize love, loyalty
    and friendship.  It took forever to put the whole thing together
    but it was worth it.  It was a labor of love.
    
    	It also meant a lot to me when I gave my twin sisters clattaugh
    rings for their birthday the year before I gave Trish hers.  I had
    to work an entire Christmas break to save up the money and I couldn't
    go out for the first month I was back at school but it was worth
    it.  The other 2 great gifts I've given.....One was a picture of
    my 3 sisters and myself that we had taken in Oct of last year to
    give to my parents....Mum and Dad had no idea and my mother cried
    for an hour when we gave it to her....and for my grandmother whom
    I loved more than anyone in the world....2 Christmases ago I went
    out and bought an electric ice cream maker....my mother almost killed
    me because I didn't have the money and I didn't spend nearly the
    amount on other people that I did on my grandmother....but never
    in my life have I ever seen my grandmother excited about ANY present
    and the look of surprise and excitement on her face Christmas morning
    is something that I will treasure forever.
    
    	The best gifts that I ever recieved.....a picture that a friend
    drew, and had matted and framed for my 20th birthday, a song that
    a friend who is a very talented pianist wrote for me on my 21st
    birthday and the incredible love that my family and friends give
    to me not just on the Holidays but throughout the year.  Love is
    the ultimate gift.
    
    GO IRISH!
    
    Rachel

    Rachel, it must be Great to have a friend like you!  Trish is very
    lucky.  Reading your note (.18) brought tears to my, uh, forget
    it.  I'm a guy and everyone knows guys don't do that!
    
    You never mentioned Her reaction to your gifts, but I can imagine!
    
    Have a great Thanksgiving,
    
    Jack

    
    Probably the neatest, bestest gift I ever rec'd was my 40th (count
    'em) birthday party thrown by friends a couple of weeks ago.
    
    Ann Marie

        Best gift I've given was rather selfish.  I gave my wife the
    game "An Enchanted Evening" and a bottle of champagne.  It's really
    more of a situation creator than a game.  It puts the "players"
    into romantic, loving or sensual situations and where you go from
    there is up to you.  After we were through with it we gave it to
    friends of ours for their anniversary, and gave them explicit
    instructions to pass it on to their friends with similar instructions.
    
        The best gift that I've recieved was a drawing from a friend
    of ours of Lesley and myself to use for our wedding invitations.
    It's a framed 16 x 20 pencil drawing that is beautiful.
    
    ASP

    The first Christmas after I started working for DEC there wasn't
    much money for Chrsitmas, what with two young children, a mortgage, 
    car payment, a single income, and a new job.
    
    I suggested to Karen (my wife) that we should buy just for the kids
    and our parents and not for each other.  She loves Christmas and
    said it was ok if I didn't buy for her, but she was going to by
    something, however small, for me.  But she understood that I wasn't
    going to buy her anything that Christmas...and accepted it.
    
    Her attitude about the situation motivated me to scrape and save 
    and go without so I could buy her a pair of diamond earrings (she
    had mentioned the earrings during a discussion of "This is what
    I would like if we could afford it."
    
    Diamond earrings come in a small box, of course, and such a small
    package would draw attention under the tree.  I didn't want her
    to see the package and figure out what I had done (didn't want her
    to feel obligated to do something for me in return) so I wrapped
    the box up and stuck a bow on the front, and attached a loop of
    string on the back, then hung it on the tree just above her eyelevel
    as though it were an ornament.  It hung there the last 3-4 days
    before Christmas, right in plain sight, without being seen.  She
    even placed a candy cane beside the box when she was re-stocking
    the tree with candy canes...never saw it.
    
    Christmas eve came and around 10pm, after all the stores were closed,
    she realized that she really was not going to get a present from
    me this Christmas.  Karen was helping me move the contents of my old
    wallet to the new wallet my mother-in-law gave me at the Christmas
    Eve celebration we had just attended when she found the sales receipt
    where I had purchased the earrings.  I casually tried to slip it into 
    my pocket without comment, but she had seen it, the cat was out
    of the bag !
    
    I tried to explain it away as an old purchase, but she insisted
    on reading the sales slip.  Then I told her that it was a receipt
    for the diamond earrings I had bought her for Christmas.  "Oh, sure
    !" was her response, "There's no package from you for me under 
    the tree."  Then I told her that not all presents are _under_ the
    treee, some are _on_ the tree.
    
    Well, she flew across the room and scanned the tree, finally her
    eye caught the little package.  She took it from the tree and opened
    it up.  Her eyes were as wide as a childs and tears started to fall
    as she saw that, in fact, there _were_ diamond earrings in the little
    box !
    
    She flew back acoss the room and hugged me tight, tears falling
    steadily as she proclaimed "I *LOVE* Christmas and I *LOVE* you
    !!!"
                                                                       
    That hug and comment were the best Christmas presents anyone has
    ever given me, before or since.
                             

    	Christmas before last, we were all gathered down the Cape for
    Christmas.  My Grandmother is 82, and has had two heart attacks,
    and she is constantly afraid that she's going to "spoil the holiday."
    
    	Well, after we'd spent the morning opening presents, we started
    to get up to go to the table for dinner, and my Grandfather was
    feeling dizzy.  He insisted on sitting down in the living room for
    a bit, and we started dinner - mostly to distract my Grandmother.
    My sister and I had each managed to wolf down one plate of food
    when he decided he'd better go to the hospital...
    
    	I drove, my sister came with me, and we spent the rest of Christmas
    day in the Emergency Ward and Coronary Care Unit of Cape Cod Hospital.
    Two days later, on his 79th birthday, my Grandfather had a pacemaker
    put in, and he's still going strong approaching his 81st birthday...
    
    	That's the best present I've ever received... 

    I'd just gotten involved with Louise (7 years ago, now) and we were
    head-over-heels after a month.  Then came the long semester break,
    we said goodbye for a month apart...she left Ithaca to return to
    New Jersey after her last final exam days before I finished..
              
    But when I was finished I detoured on my way home for the holiday,
    arriving at Marjorie's house on Long Island, the evening of the
    22nd.  Marjorie had arranged to spend a day in NYC with Louise,
    enjoying the Christmas season, walking 5th Avenue, going to the
    toy store (F.A.O. Schwartz), watching the ice skaters at Rockefeller
    Center, etc...and Marjorie and I had arranged that I'd be there
    too!  We met Louise in one of the big stations when she got off a NJ
    train...the three of us spent the entire day in an intoxicated whirl,
    up the trade center towers, accross town by subway, lunch at Ray's
    Pizza in the village...I remember them crouched down over a street
    vendor's leg warmers, I haggled quietly overhead, and when they'd
    made their selections the deal was already done...($5/2pair, and
    probably the most fun gift I ever had the chance to give).
    
    I remember the eyes glowing, that long ago December in New York
    City, when we said goodbye, for a month.  I've never had a better
    holiday...
    
    DougO

    The summer before my husband and I got married he left for three
    months to work in Colorado.  It was a lonely summer without him.
    But on June 20th - a year before we were to get married - he sent
    me a dozen roses and a note that said "Happy -1 Anniversary".  It
    was a wonderful surprise!

    Best gift(s) ever received:  my mother made a picture album
    with selections pictures of me and the rest of the family
    through the years.  Sometime later she gave me a neatly
    decorated notebook with all our favorite family recipes in
    it.  Neither of these were special occasion gifts, she just
    gave them to me.

    I was with my sister in the delivery room the night she gave
    birth to her daughter (who is practically perfect in every
    way).  What an incredible high, to participate in (as it
    seemed) the creation of a new life where none had been
    before!  The next day at work I burbled to everyone "My
    sister and I had a baby last night!" which got me more than a
    few odd looks.  :)  Although no one "gave" me the gift of
    being present at Shawna's birth, it sure felt like a gift.

    Best gift(s) ever given:  On the occasion of an uncle's
    funeral several years ago, we happened to have all of the
    cousins together for a wonder.  We called a local studio and
    managed to get our portrait taken that afternoon without
    any of the "grown-ups" being the wiser (fortunately some of
    the cousins were old enough to drive).  A few weeks later we
    were able to present the picture to my aunt (for whom we
    primarily intended it) as well as the other "grown-ups."
    Unfortunately I wasn't there to see her face...

    The other "best gift given" was when I was in high school.
    For a decade my parents had owned one of those portable
    turntable-plus-attached-speaker atrocities, and my sister and
    I managed to scrape together enough to buy them a nice
    inexpensive "real" stereo -- my mother cried when they opened
    it, which really did scare me until I realized she was happy
    about it.  What fun!

    -- Linda

    I think  I  just  came  up  with a suitable entry. For my sister's
    birthday  I got her a hand dyed Bolivian sweater. It was her style
    and  her  colors.  When  she  unwraped it she said that she hadn't
    realized that you could get clothes as a gift and like it.

    The other notable gift was when my brother and I bought my parents
    a  new  turntable.  My  sister, who was  less than 10, insisted on
    contributing  all her savings. It didn't matter that her share was
    just  over a dollar; she put in all her money, and Bill and I only
    used some of ours.

--David

    
    For my grandfather's 90th birthday last year, my family put together
    a huge collage of pictures of the three generations of people he
    is responsible for (as well as spouses, friends, etc.), and surprised
    him at what he thought was just a party for my uncle. He's now 91
    and going strong!
    
    When I was eight, a friend of our family gave me a Teddy Bear right
    after my father died. I still have him. He is like an old friend
    everytime I go home.
    
    For my mother's birthday a few years ago, my brothers and I found
    an old, very large poster brought over from Austria when my father
    came to this country. It advertised my father conducting an opera
    ("Die Fledermaus") in Vienna (it was one of those huge posters,
    like you see in front of Symphony Hall). We had it restored and
    framed and now it hangs in my mother's bedroom.
    
    This year, for Chanukah, was my first year out of school so I finally
    decided to buy my mother a fairly expensive gift, now that I am working.
    I got her a beautiful Waterford lead crystal paperweight, because
    I know she LOVES Waterford, and she did love it! I think the best
    gift for her though was that I got it at a discount store. She was
    more proud of the fact that she raised such a good shopper than
    that I got her such a beautiful gift! :^)
                                          
    Roberta
    

    A memorable gift received this Christmas -
    
    After all of the gifts under our tree had been opened Christmas
    morning, my mom gave each of us three kids a check for $25...which
    was not made out to anyone. She told us that since we had so much,
    she and my stepdad were donating, in our names, to the charity of
    our choice.
    
    I just have to decide where I weant that money to go...
    
    -Amy.

    
    
    re.29  amy
    
       I **like** that idea for a gift!!
    
    
    
    robin

    Don't forget to enclose a matching gift form when the checks are
    mailed to the selected charity. You'll have to claim that you're
    making the donation yourself, which is true enough for the purpose.

    Chuck

    Probably the most memorable gift I ever gave was the celebration
    of my mom's birthday this past June. She had been telling me
    since I was about 12 that for her birthday, she wanted a ride
    in a hot air balloon. 
    
    The morning of her ride dawned clear and beautiful. We watched as
    they inflated the balloon, then my step brother and I followed in
    my car as my mom and stepdad soared away over the clouds...
    
    (At one point, they came down over the strawberry fields in Westford,
    hovering about 3 feet off the ground...All of the people who lived
    nearby came out of their houses to watch ... one woman, whose little
    boy was peeking out from behind her legs told them that he thought
    they were from The Wizard Of Oz...)
    
    They landed in a parking lot... we all shared champagne (at 7:00
    in the morning!). Then we watched them put the balloon away. The
    whole event was, for some reason, incredibly moving to me. In fact,
    I am sitting here with tears in my eyes as I write this.
    
    But, unbeknownst to my mom, this was only part of the celebration
    of her birthday. A week later, my sister came in to town (from
    Cleveland). We told my mom she'd have to leave the house for a few
    hours on Saturday, because we were going to cook her a very special
    dinner for her birthday. What we really did was set up a giant surprise
    birthday party.
    
    Mom came home, I had managed to get everyone into the living room,
    and all were very quiet. (even the kids) My sister and I met mom at 
    the car and walked her in, one of us on each side, with her eyes 
    closed. We got to the doorway of the living room. Everyone was sitting 
    in there facing the doorway. it was like a solid wall of all of the 
    people who love her. We told mom she could open her eyes. She did,
    igured out what was going on, saw all of the out of town people,
    and started crying. I knew then that we had done a good job.
    
    The best part was that she had no idea what was going on. and there
    were so many clues... 
    
    Yep, that was the most memorable gift I can think of.
    
    -Amy.
    
                                     

    My Mother died in 1959 from a ruptured utereus after childbirth.
    I was 7.  My father never shared anything of her even after all these
    years.  I never was given anything of hers, nothing.  this year,
    I opened a package at the parents house, it was an oriental fan
    of hers, mounted and framed, with the box it came in, written on
    it, her name and the year she bought it, 1952, the year I was born.  
    I don't remember much after that......
    
    Thanks Dad.....
    
    vivian

    This Christmas my husband, Dave, and I gave his mom enough money to fly
    herself out here for Christmas.  Since she lives in Oregon we seldom
    get to see her.  It was so wonderful and it meant so much to both of
    them.  It was the first time Dave had spent Christmas with his mom
    since his parents had been divorced 12 years ago.  It was a very
    special Christmas and a tradition we hope to continue. 
    
    Suzanne

    It was 1968 when I left home and spent 3 years overseas right after
    I left, my mother and father were divorced.  In 1988 my mother was
    coming out to the east coast with some friends.  I drove to Conn.
    (I found out she was coming via letter...we did communicate)  I
    was waiting for her when she got off of a bus at her hotel.  It
    was the first time I had seen her in 20 years...and the only time
    I said "I love you mom..." in 30 needless to say we both cried and
    gave each other the biggest hugs ever.........she said after that
    that she need not receive any other gifts...the words she had waited
    30 years to hear were enough....
    
    Still makes me kinda glassy eyed...
    
    Ron