Conference turris::womannotes-v1

    hmmm... I know of Battered Women's shelters, Rape Crisis Centers,
    but Legal/Emotional Counsel?  My advice would be to call the Cambridge
    Women's Center and get the right numbers.  Failing that, try a feminist
    GYN center (like the Cambridge Women's Health Center, different
    from the Center I mentioned above) -- get an appointment for a gyn
    check-up [if he objects, tell him there was a problem and she was
    referred to a specific doctor at this place], and when there, explain
    the problem and ask for the right people to talk to.
    
    He can't keep her from seeing a "doctor", eh?  And the people there
    give darned good advice.
    
    Lee

    	She should talk to a lawyer.  Prenuptial agreements are
    	not legally binding in many states.  Many of the battered
    	women's shelters do not publicize their location, and have
    	someone at the door at all times, so that the police can
    	be called if anyone tries to forcefully get her to leave.

    RE: 2
    A good lawyer to see would be Samuel Kunen, Main St. Marlboro.
    
    
    Keep in touch.
    
    P
    

The Visting Nurse Association will sometimes provide a social worker 
that will visit a home, assess a situation, and provide some counselling.

    re: .0
    
    "I know this sounds incredible, especially here in Eastern Mass."
    
    How I wish that it did sound incredible; to my ears, with every
    passing day, it sounds more and more common. . .
    
    Good luck; seems to me that just caring enough to try to help
    is a demonstration of what I'd call "everyday heroics".
    
    Steve
    

    She definitely shouldn't assume that just because she signed an
    agreement, it will be upheld as written in court.  Melvin Belli's
    book, which I read recently, said that courts were very, very
    reluctant to enforce prenuptial agreements that were patently unfair
    to one party.  She should certainly talk to a lawyer.

    
    Hi, I just want to elaborate, I think some of you missed my drift.
    I do not know the woman personally.  The husband has "friends" who
    have told me about this.  I'm sure all of you are right about the
    prenuptial *crap*, but my main concern is who could come and 
    check out the situation?  I was hoping that there might be some
    welfare agency or perhaps a battered women's organization that
    might be able to visit her.  Keep in mind that she doesn't even
    drive (or have money for a taxi), and is probably too naive to
    think of calling a lawyer.
    
    --tm

    She gets the mail before he gets home.  One could mail her some
    of the information learned here and elsewhere.

    RE -1, providing the mail arrives on a weekday...
    

    Mail it on Sunday night then.

Therese,

Here's one approach.  Since you know who she is, you could call her up and
very quietly, low key, say you've heard that she may be going through a
difficult period and you wonder if perhaps you could give her some info
that she may find helpful, either now or in the future. 

Tell her about a few support groups in Marlboro.  Give her their phone
numbers and make it clear they guard the anonymity (sp?) of anyone who
contacts them.  (And don't mention her difficulties in Any detail.) 

Also, it may be important to tell her that the phone numbers you give 
her are in her local calling area and will not show up on the phone bill. 
(I think that would be of concern to her; you can get this info from the 
phone company)

She may snarl at you, or be speechless, but at least she will then know 
about these places. 

So that's my idea. But I hope other noters who have known people in such a 
situation will say whether this might be useful or would upset her.

               Meigs

    Re: .11
    
    Thanks Meigs,
    
    That sounds like a pretty good idea.  It's hard to say how 
    she will take it, but I can try.
    
    Now if anyone has suggestions of places she could call (either
    toll free or local to Marlboro), please reply to this note.
    
    -Therese-
    

I've been calling a woman's shelter in Framingham for info, but no one is 
answering the phone.  (By the way, the Marlboro police gave me the shelter 
number over the phone.)

I'll post info as soon as I get it.  And I will get it.

In the last few days, I've asked four people what they thought of making
such a phone call.  All four said "Sounds OK. Maybe it will help her."
Jeez, I thought everybody would faint. 

I'm paranoid about calling any gov agency. My husband discovered an elderly
man and woman living in an uninsulated one room shack.  He called a few gov
agencies and the *best* offer anyone made is "Well, if it's that bad, we
could condemn the house." 

              Meigs         

The HEALTH INFORMATION REFERRAL SERVICE (HIRS)
169 Pleasant Street (in the Boy's Club Building)
Marlboro, MA 01752

(617) 481-8290

RAPE HOTLINE:  (617) 485-7273

This is a group that was started by a group of volunteer 
women (feminist in nature) back in the early 1970's and
has evolved into a comprehensive non-profit agency that
handles non-directive pregnancy counselling, young parent's
groups, teen clinics, abuse issues of any kind (physical,
sexual, and psychological).  I would highly recommend 
contacting the women of this service for help in any type
of problem.  They are caring, concerned, and confidential.


Digital does fund them partially through grants. 

The Service also offers training programs for volunteering on
the RAPE HOTLINE and would be happy to hear from anyone interested
in taking the program.  Call the main number listed above for
this information.  The course is very well taught with up-to-date
information.  Thank you to anyone considering being a volunteer.

RE:  .14

	I forgot to add that these services offered by HIRS are also
	available to men/boys/males.  This same group of men/boys/males
	are also encouraged to sign up and volunteer on the RAPE HOTLINE.
	The course is for both sexes and usually is given with both
	sexes participating at the same time.  Anyone needing CEU's can
	check with the office so if anyone knows of anyone looking
	to take the course, SPREAD THE WORD!