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Conference turris::womannotes-v1

Title:ARCHIVE-- Topics of Interest to Women, Volume 1 --ARCHIVE
Notice:V1 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open.
Moderator:REGENT::BROOMHEAD
Created:Thu Jan 30 1986
Last Modified:Fri Jun 30 1995
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:873
Total number of notes:22329

654.0. "Men's and Women's Speaking Styles" by TOLKIN::JOYCE (Maryellen Joyce) Fri Jan 15 1988 15:09

Below are some excerpts from an article titled "Girl Talk, Guy
Talk" in the February 1988 issue of Psychology Today.  If you 
would like to see the entire article, please let me know and I'll 
forward you a copy.  I've tried not to duplicate the entire 
article here while keeping the relevant portions.

I thought this information would be of interest due to the 
several discussions in various notes on the perceived differences 
in the way some men and some women respond in interactions. 

Since there seems to be several notes going on with themes sort 
of related but not quite, I decided to start a new note.

The purpose of this note, therefore, is to discuss the perceived 
differences (or are there any differences?) in women's and men's 
styles of speech. 

Excerpts of article:

"...enter the stereotypical world of men's and women's speech, in
which men tend to dominate conversations, interrupt or shift the
topic to one they prefer, and in which women - by adopting a
questioning, tentative tone - work hard to gain men's
attentions." 

"In fact, a decade's worth of research has shown that men and
women in our culture use distinctive styles of speech and also
tend to play different roles when talking with one another.  More
recently, researchers have moved away from examining men's and
women's language in the abstract, preferring to scrutinize the
actual settings, such as courtrooms and physicians' offices, in
which conversation takes place.  Although some researchers now
suggest that speech patterns are as much a function of social
status as of gender, studies have confirmed definite sex
differences in diverse situations." 

"Boston College sociologist Charles Derber has studied the roles 
that men and women take on in conversation and has found that men 
often shift conversations to their preferred topics, whereas 
women are more apt to respond supportively."

"Viewing language in concrete situations has led some researchers
to argue recently that speech is at least as much a function of
social status as of gender....[further studies indicate that]
both [gender and social status play] a part. ... 'It appears,'
[Candace] West [a sociologist at the University of California]
concludes, 'that gender can take precedence over occupational
status in conversation.'" 

"At the same time, gender differences in speech may simply 
reflect power relations between men and women in general.  
Maryann Ayim, who teaches education at the University of Western 
Ontario, puts it this way: 'If females are more polite and less 
aggressive than males in their language practices, if they are 
more supportive and less dominant, this is hardly shocking, for 
it simply reflects the reality in every other sphere of life.'"


T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
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654.1speak now, or forever...LEDS::ORINEnsoniq, is EPS a Mirage?Tue Jan 19 1988 16:5228
Here are some free form thoughts on this very interesting topic...

related words: speech, language, conversation, oratory, dialogue, diction

I am fascinated by languages, slang and colloquial expressions, profanity,
graffiti, poetry, etc. I can hear women better because I have a slight
hearing loss in the low vocal range. I find most women's voices to be
very soothing (reminiscent of mom). News reporters, male and female, tend
to have excellent diction, but I find that their tone is very artificial.
I perceive this artificial tone as very aggressive in women and annoying
in men (unpleasant in either case). I like both male and female vocalists.
I tend to like the mellow sound (Crystal Gail, Lionell Ritchie) as opposed
to the harsh sound (Janis Joplin, Springstein). In Puerto Rico, the only
people I could understand were the tv newspeople, because their diction
was textbook Spanish, even though I took Spanish from 3rd grade all the
way thru college. As far as role playing goes, I think that women can
use speech and body language to be very persuasive, sexy, "cute". I like
Cindy Lauper's speech. She is so "cute" with that N.Y. accent and the
little girl voice. She is also a genuinely nice person. I wonder what
she really looks like? On the other hand, when I hear that whinning voice
of Sally Struthers begging for more more money, I immediately change the
channel. Compassion does not require whinning. Men tend to speak more
curtly, direct to the point, aggressively, etc. (but not always). Public
speakers are another breed. Politicians have to be effective. They have
speech writers who are experts. I like debates because that's when you
really start to get into their heads.

Dave
654.2Woman's Voice is more commandingTARKIN::TRIOLOVictoria TrioloWed Jan 20 1988 09:5211
    I watched part of the NOVA program last night about the planes
    and pilots who fly TOP GUN.  In some instances, a computerized
    voice will relay the information on some of the many dials and 
    displays.  (it's hard to read the displays at 9 Gs).  
    
    Anyhow, the computerized voice is a "woman's" voice because
    in testing the pilots under different G's and under different
    stressful conditions, and I quote "a woman's voice is more
    commanding".  I guess the pilots tend to react to a woman's
    voice faster than they would to a man's and while flying these
    planes, every second counts.
654.3COLORS::MODICAWed Jan 20 1988 10:533
    RE: .2	Yes, I too watched the show and that singular fact
    		fascinated me. I sure would like to have more
    		background info. on that particular point. 
654.4VINO::EVANSWed Jan 20 1988 11:4711
    RE:.2,.3
    
    I admit to being incredibly surprised at this. Especially since
    military men have been trained from day-1 (99-100%) by *males*
    ordering them around. Seems the instinct to react would've been
    ingrained by then....
    
    Ver-r-r-r-y Inn-n-n-ter-r-res-s-sting....
    
    --DE
    
654.5who's the boss ?HEFTY::CHARBONNDWhat a pitcher!Wed Jan 20 1988 12:039
    Dawn , two years of military service probably doesn't equal 
    eighteen years of mom and schools where the preponderance of
    teachers are female.
    
    On the other hand, individualistic types might have a negative
    reaction to a male voice *ordering* them. Whereas a female
    voice is less threatening.  ?
    
    Dana
654.6Amateur speculationsREGENT::BROOMHEADDon't panic -- yet.Wed Jan 20 1988 12:0914
    There are several ways to look at this fact:
    
    1.  Males pay more attention to a female voice
    	a. for sexual reasons.
    	b. for social reasons.  (His mother's voice. :-)
    2.  A woman's voice is higher pitched and carries better under the
    [implied] conditions.
    3.  A woman's voice carries no threat and will be listened to with
    less anxiety.
    4.  A woman's voice *is* more commanding.
    
    and I'm only sure of Number 2.
    
    							Ann B.
654.7a nit...VINO::EVANSWed Jan 20 1988 12:1711
    Dana...only elementary school teachers are mostly women.
    
    Still, the voice that's required *instant* action (Yes, sir!)
    in military training has been *male*. 
    
    In addition, my experience with  adolescent boys and adult
    men is that they tend to follow directions from men, not from
    women. (If both are present, and giving directions) 
    
    --DE
    
654.8Sensory ModesGCANYN::TATISTCHEFFLee TWed Jan 20 1988 12:5541
    Reading something on speaking, I found an interesting hypothesis
    (she presented it as fact, but I still reserve judgement): that
    people express themselves in _sensory_ modes.
    
    "How does that look to you", "Am I blue"
    
    "How does that sound"
    
    "That makes my gut twist"
    
    "I smell a rat"
    
    [and I can't think of a phrase illustrating taste, off-hand]
    
    Elgin (and others, I assume) asserts that every person has a
    _preferred_ mode of speech and that it largely reflects which sense
    a person uses primarily in experiencing the world.  She goes on
    to add that the most words are available to communicate things on
    the basis of sight, though sound is not far behind.  Those who rely
    on touch/feel have many fewer words at their command, and those
    poor souls who think in terms of taste or smell have almost no words
    at all with which to communicate.
    
    She maintains that in times of stress, most of us can _only_ use
    our preferred mode, and have great difficulty understanding someone
    using a different mode.
    
    For example, I rely mostly on feel/touch.  The ultimate argument
    for me is for someone to tell me how my words make them _feel_,
    if their stomach writhes, if it gets their hackles up.  Saying
    something "doesn't sound" or "look right" means very little to me
    unless I can stop and think very, very carefully about their words,
    especially if is something that has me all "het up".
    
    While I don't know how these sensory modes follow gender lines,
    it might be interesting to keep in mind when reading other people's
    replies: maybe the reason the person "sounds wrong/crazy" is because
    they are trying to explain why something doesn't _look_ right to
    them.
    
    Lee
654.9How aboutANGORA::BUSHEEGeorge BusheeWed Jan 20 1988 13:0012
    	
    	RE: .8
    
    	 Lee,
    
    	  How about:  "that <whatever> leaves a bad taste in
    			my mouth"
    
    
    
    	Use to hear this all the time growing up........
    
654.11Recheck the program on Sun to verifySTING::BARBERSkyking Tactical ServicesWed Jan 20 1988 14:4014
    
     RE .2     I believe you have your facts a bit mixed up. Ann B.
               has the right reason why the voice is female. Its not
               because of command authority, its because it carries 
               better and is more soothing in a stressful situation
               that a man's voice.
    
               A perfect example of that was when that Major was talking
               about when his wingman tried to warn him of the MiG on
               his tail and he never heard him. When they got back to
               the base, he replayed the cockpit tapes and then heard
               the warning on the tape. 

                                           Bob B
654.12Turbo F-14, with 80-watt stereo, heated seats...STAR::BECKPaul BeckWed Jan 20 1988 17:568
    I saw the program, but didn't hear an express rationale for
    selecting a female voice other than the fact that it commanded
    attention better.
    
    I don't believe it's related to the armed forces environment,
    though; the same thing applies to cars. The computerized voice
    in my Nissan is female. When my wife saw the program on PBS,
    her reaction was "now Nissan is building jet fighters".
654.13BOLT::MINOWJe suis marxiste, tendance GrouchoWed Jan 20 1988 18:4712
I vaguely recall reading a couple of studies on this issue.  Two
reasons were given:

-- The female voice is unlike other voices the pilots hears (from
   ground controllers and other pilots).  Thus, it pokes through
   the noise.

-- "Sounds like mom" (specifically "mom" and not "girl friend") and
   triggers innate attention mechanisms.

Martin.

654.14Even more amateur speculationWHYVAX::KRUGERThu Jan 21 1988 16:0811
    When under extreme physical stress (9G isn't a picnic), you may need to
    draw on subconscious strength. Maybe hearing mom saying something
    triggers this reaction. I am reminded of the movie Terminator (Rah
    Arnold!) In which the heroine, beginning to adjust to a harsh new
    reality, screams at her wounded lover
    
    "ON YOUR FEET, SOLDIER! ON -- YOUR -- FEET!"
    
    That scene has always struck a chord in me. Now I wonder.
    
    dov
654.16VISA::MONAHANhumanity is a trojan horseMon Apr 25 1988 05:258
    	I worked for 3 years in a speech processing research group. In
    conditions of high background noise a female voice is much more likely
    to be intelligible than a male voice. That is regardless of who is
    listening.
    
    	During the 39-45 war many air traffic controllers were women, and
    it was not just that men were in scarce supply. Women are
    physiologically more suited to the job.