Conference turris::womannotes-v1

440.0. "Dieting" by MAY20::MINOW (Je suis Marxist, tendance Groucho) Thu Aug 13 1987 00:22

Announcing the USENET Stress diet.

Article 2903 of sci.med:
Path: decvax!mcnc!rutgers!ames!ptsfa!ihnp4!cuae2!killer!ozdaltx!root
From: [email protected] (root)
Organization: OZ BBS - Dallas, TX
Lines: 53

The following diet has been circulated at one of the local
clinics. Some may find it stimulating.

BREAKFAST:
---------
1/2	grapefruit
1	slice whole wheat toast
8 oz	skim milk


LUNCH:
------
4 oz 	lean Broiled chicken breast
1 cup	steamed zucchini
1	Oreo Cookie
	Herb tea

MID-AFTERNOON SNACK:
___________________
Rest of package of Oreos
1	qt. rocky road ice cream
1	jar hot fudge

DINNER:
-------
2	loaves garlic bread
	large pepperoni & mushroom pizza
	large pitcher beer (any brand - it all comes from
        the same horse, anyway)
3	Milkey Way bars
	Entire Sarah Lee cheesecake - direct from freezer.


				DIET TIPS
				---------
1. If no one sees you eat it --- it has no calories.
2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar they cancel
   each other out.
3. When eating with someone else, calories don't count if
   you both eat the same amount.
4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER counts such as:
   Hot Chocolate, Brandy, Toast and Sarah Lee cheesecake.
5. If YOU fatten up EVERYONE ELSE around you. -- Then YOU
   look thinner.
6. Movie related foods don't count because they are simply
   part of the entire entertainment experience and not part of
   one's personal fuel, such as Milk Duds, Popcorn with extra
   butter, and Junior Mints.
-- 
************************************************
* Scotty                     *  Adapt          *
* ihnp4!killer!ozdaltx!sysop *     Enjoy       *
* "Ad Venerem Securiorem"    *        Survive  *

    and to think - I nearly didn't finish it when I saw the
    breakfast!