| Title: | ARCHIVE-- Topics of Interest to Women, Volume 1 --ARCHIVE |
| Notice: | V1 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open. |
| Moderator: | REGENT::BROOMHEAD |
| Created: | Thu Jan 30 1986 |
| Last Modified: | Fri Jun 30 1995 |
| Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
| Number of topics: | 873 |
| Total number of notes: | 22329 |
I have a friend (whom I will call Sue). She lives in a medium/large
city in eastern Mass with her husband and year-old baby. Sue is
very close to her family and high school friends, who live about an
hour away, and visits them every week, and talks with them on the
phone daily. She works 2 days a week at some distance from her home,
and enjoys the interactions with people there a great deal. She
is happily married, and enjoys being a mother.
Sue is having a hard time connecting with other young mothers near
her home. Her close family meets many of her needs, but she finds
that she is very lonely on the days she is home by herself with
the baby. She doesn't say much about it, but I know she would love
to be able to connect with some other mothers, and to find some
playmates for her child as well.
I suggested checking out the local library and Y for toddler programs.
She did, and it turns out that many such programs are for mothers
of 2 year olds and older. I was surprised, since she was looking
for something she and her daughter could do together.
How do people do this? Not being a mother, I quickly ran out of
suggestions for someone with a year-old child! I know once Sue's
child is in pre-school, it will be easy to meet other children and
other mothers, but what do mothers of babies do (in cities) to connect
with other people?
I'd appreciate your help.
Holly
| T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 196.3 | more ideas | YAZOO::B_REINKE | Down with bench Biology | Wed Feb 11 1987 14:55 | 14 |
When the weather gets warmer she should try going for walks with
the baby in a carrage or stroller. I found this a wonderful way
to meet people about 17 years ago.
If there is a small mom and pop type store near by, the sort that
knows it's regular customers real well she could try putting up
a sign indicating that she is looking for mothers of babies
that want to get together.
She could also try and look for a local church that has young
families attending and that has a baby nursery during the services.
If she doesn't want to attend services she could try volunteering
to babysit on Sundays.
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| 196.5 | SWSNOD::RPGDOC | Dennis the Menace | Thu Feb 12 1987 15:16 | 4 | |
If she's nursing the infant, she might seek out the local La Leche
League group. There would usually be several mothers with babies
in the same age range, who may find themselves in a similar situation.
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| 196.6 | Our experiences | TSG::BRADY | Bob Brady, TSG, LMO4-1/K4, 296-5396 | Tue Jun 30 1987 12:26 | 22 |
My wife faced the same problem, although out in the 'burbs which can be even more isolating - just takes so much energy for a weary mother to pack baby + gear and drive to visit friends. Women with option/inclination to stay home for extended period with the baby seem now to be a very lonely minority...what support mechanisms there are (not enough in this culture to begin with) largely geared to those returning to work quickly. We never really solved the problem, our daughter will be preschool material in a few months. One odd resource: our one indulgence in those manic months was breakfast out on weekends...we went to a family-type pancake house where nobody minded fussy babies...and many of the "regulars" there were in our situation, at least that was some contact with outside world... In re: .5, approach La Leche with a grain of salt, they can overdo it in the direction of making mother feel she should be Total Nurturer...my wife and I used to laugh about lots of their leaflets, called them "breastfeeding porn"...lots of soft-focus shots of lovely young mother fresh from the hairdresser, surrounded with flowers, demure nursing gown, faraway dewey-eyed blissful look. They do give excellent technical information, but they could give more emphasis to mothers' needs/rest. But the other attendees might be a resource. | |||||
| 196.7 | TOPDOC::GLIDEWELL | Thu Oct 08 1987 22:58 | 16 | ||
This topic bothers me ... because almost every young mother has
the same experience as Sue in .0 and it's been like this for at
least decades. Why haven't we formed a national/local organization
to bring mothers with children together ... At least in the US,
we have Rotary, Lions, Toastmasters, Weight Watchers, ... Come to
think of it, NOW is the only US woman's organization that I know
about (of the non-professional variety).
This would be a great project for NOW, or for any mother who has
some org skills and is willing to start a local mom's club. After
all, there is a mother's of Twins organization. Suggest to Sue
that she try it; even, worse case, if it doesn't get off the ground
or go well, she will have met bunches of people in the process.
And if it does go well, and spreads, she wwill have done something
wonderful. Meigs
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| 196.8 | two | STUBBI::B_REINKE | where the sidewalk ends | Thu Oct 08 1987 23:42 | 2 |
The only other national active womens groups I know of
are la leche and some of the peace movement groups.
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