Conference yukon::christian_v7

    It's an interesting subject... 
    
    How about for those of us who don't have parents deserving of honor?
    
    

    I think that, in that case, we should still try to honour our parents,
    difficult though it may be (and I admit I often fall short on this
    one).
    How many of us deserve salvation? Isn't it a very good thing that we
    don't have to earn it? :-)

    Difficult question, Nance.
    
    We're not deserving of G-d's honor, grace, compassion, and mercy, and
    yet - hasn't He showered us with just that?
    
    "Honor your father and mother that you may live long in the land I am
    giving you....".  There are no conditions placed on that honor.
    
    And yet - when a parent steps out of the role of nuturer and into the
    role of abuser; what is the child to do?
    
    Very very difficult stuff.
    
    Perhaps (and I'm no expert here, just offering a thought) we honor our
    parents out of respect for G-d, even when they don't deserve our honor,
    and trust Him to heal them and bless us?
    
    tough question, Nancy....
    
    Steve
    

    *another* notes collision with the same response!
    
    wow! :-)

�    How about for those of us who don't have parents deserving of honor?

I don't think that we can deny them everything - they brought us into the 
world, and gave us what we are, humanly speaking.  We inherit both our
character and our human nature (humanity) from them; even if we are ashamed
of it, without it, we would not exist.... 

I know that there are parents [like yours, Nancy] who commit terrible
things against their children. - without the advantage of the revelation of
the Holy Spirit in their hearts.  But what would *we* be like, if He had
not made us into what we are? 

I'm not just looking for excuses for them, but rather, thinking of the
parable of the servant who was forgiven so much, and then tried to grind
fellow servant into the dust for a pittance owed him.... (Matthew 18:30). 
We haven't anything to reproach others with, compared with what God has
forgiven us. 

"Against You, You only have I sinned ..."  Psalm 51:4 


Myself, I'd like to mention my deep appreciation of my mother, who gave me
up at birth for adoption, so that I would live in a complete family (I
presume). That must have been heartbreakingly hard.  I am certain that her
prayers followed me.  I look forward to meeting her in heaven... 

I am also deeply grateful for the family who made me theirs, for the mother
and father who *are* my mother and father, as really as if I were born into
their family.  For the brother and sister, and other relations....

All God's provision.  "God sets the lonely in families" Psalm 68:6

He has been *so* good to me.  Thank You Father.

							Andrew

See note 55.3 (and maybe 55.*)  This deals with forgiving a parent.

A similar note is in 163.1 and 163.2 (but has to do more with parenting than
  being parented.

I think there were other notes entered on this subject but I didn't hunt
any further.
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Honoring the dishonorable:

Define honor.

    Yes, Mark, topic 55 deals with forgiveness...
    
    But can one forgive and not honor?
    
    As you say define honor... anybody want to take a stab at it?
    
    

    Honor - to ascribe value or worth to someone or something.
    

    
    I have learned to honor my father under the most difficult
    circumstances.  I'm still working on my mother-in-law!
    
    jeff

>    But can one forgive and not honor?

>>    Honor - to ascribe value or worth to someone or something.

Now I remember.  Didn't we exchange E-mail on this, Nance?
I think a better question for you to ask is "can one honor and
not forgive?"

Forgiveness is different than honoring.  

Perhaps in the case of a dishonorable parent, the same idea of 
"if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything" applies to
the situation.  Perhaps the idea of ascribing value to the valueless
(and is the parent *truly* without value?  and to whom?), may be in
the double negative - not dishonoring.  On the surface, I have trouble
with it, because the command is to honor - active.  But not understanding
the situation personally, it means that comment fall short of the mark.

If there is any value,then that can be ascribed to the person.  I don't
think it means throwing a birthday party, or paying tribute, but it may
mean recognizing God's hand in making you.

MM

>    I have learned to honor my father under the most difficult
>    circumstances.  I'm still working on my mother-in-law!

8^D

Hey, honoring and mothers-in-law aren't in the same commandment, Jeff!  8^D

MM (who likes his MiL)

    Hmmm don't remember mail, but do remember topic 55. :-)
    
    If honor means to give value, than since I became a Christian I've
    never not honored my parents.
    
    If honor means bestow gifts or herald, I'm in big trouble.

I'll see if I have the mail lying around - but I doubt it.
I'm sure we discussed this very thing.

MM

    	A saying I once saw.
    
    	You can tell a lot about a man by how happy his wife is, and
    	by how his children respect him.